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Education and Communications
Autobiographies

How to Write About Your Own Life

Last Updated: February 6, 2024 Approved

This article was co-authored by Stephanie Wong Ken, MFA . Stephanie Wong Ken is a writer based in Canada. Stephanie's writing has appeared in Joyland, Catapult, Pithead Chapel, Cosmonaut's Avenue, and other publications. She holds an MFA in Fiction and Creative Writing from Portland State University. There are 12 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. wikiHow marks an article as reader-approved once it receives enough positive feedback. In this case, several readers have written to tell us that this article was helpful to them, earning it our reader-approved status. This article has been viewed 162,452 times.

People choose to write about their lives for a variety of reasons, including a desire to leave a memoir for their children and future generations, to create a record for themselves so they can be reminded of their youthful adventures when they're old and forgetful, and to offer something of value to the rest of the world. Writing a memoir is a very personal experience, but if you're willing to share your life story, it can be incredibly rewarding.

Preparing to Write

Most memoirists struggle to begin their life story and are not sure where to start. Depending on your life story, you may reach out to other family members for details on a childhood memory or event. But it’s important that you also focus on your personal experiences and your recollection of a childhood memory or moment, even if it may be flawed. Often, the best memoirs are about the process of remembering an event, or are about processing a moment in the past that felt important.

Speak, Memory by Vladimir Nabokov. Nabokov is a highly regarded fiction writer, but one of his most celebrated works is his memoir of his childhood in Russia. The book is a good example of using literary prose and masterful storytelling to share a personal history.
The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion. Didion’s memoir focuses on the sudden death of her husband and the death of her adult daughter a few months later. This is a great example of using memory to inform the present, which for Didion, is colored by extreme grief and a sense of mortality.
Maus by Art Spiegelman. This is a graphic novel that uses animals to tell Spiegelman’s father memories of being imprisoned in a concentration camp during the Holocaust. Spiegelman’s use of animals in fact makes the memoir feel that much more universal and relatable.
The Woman Warrior by Maxine Hong Kingston. Kingston’s memoir of growing up as a Chinese immigrant in California combines myth, legend, and memory. Another good example of using different writing styles or approaches to write about your own life.

Why did the author choose to highlight certain events in their life in the memoir? Consider why the memoirist chose a certain section of their childhood or a specific life event as the focus of the book. For example, Didion’s book The Year of Magical Thinking focuses on the recent deaths of her husband and her daughter, while Nabokov’s Speak, Memory focuses on his childhood in Russia. One event is in the recent past while one event is in the very distant past. Yet both events have a very strong, and possibly traumatic, effect on the writers.
What were the narrator’s desires in the memoir? What was motivating the narrator to share this particular story with the reader? Often, memoirs can be cathartic for the writer. Perhaps the writer was trying to process a year of grieving and loss, as Didion does in The Year of Magical Thinking , or perhaps the writer was trying to describe a childhood in a concentration camp, as Spiegelman does in his memoir Maus . Consider the motivations of the writer for putting down their story and presenting it to readers.
How did the memoir keep the reader engaged and interested in the story? The best memoirs are honest and unflinching, with details or admissions that the writer may be afraid to make. The writer may write in a way that feels truthful, full of moments that may not make the writer look good or conflicted. But readers often respond to vulnerability in a memoir, and a writer who is not afraid to describe their failures along with their successes.
Were you satisfied with the ending of the memoir? Why or why not? Unlike an autobiography, a memoir does not need to have a linear beginning, middle, and end. Most memoirs end without any firm conclusions or end of life moments. Instead, memoirs may end with thoughts on a running theme throughout the book, or with reflections on the pivotal event or moment in the writer’s life.

Structuring Your Story

Step 1 Identify your narrator’s desire line.

Try to sum up what your narrator wants in one sentence. For example: I wanted to understand my mother’s decision to move our family to America. Or, I wanted to become healthier after a brief brush with death. Or, I wanted to explore my experiences as an air force pilot in World War II.
Be specific in your desire line and avoid vague statements. Your desire line may change as you write your memoir. But its good to have a clear desire in mind before you start writing.

Step 2 Determine the key actions and obstacles in your story.

Try to write your actions and obstacles in short sentences: To get my desire line, I did this action. But then an obstacle got in my way. So, I did this action to overcome this obstacle.
For example: To understand why my mother moved my family to the United States, I tried to track down my mother’s family in Poland. But then I couldn’t locate my mother’s family due to poor records and missing relatives. So I went on a trip to Poland to better understand my mother and her family.

Step 3 Outline the inciting incident and the ending incident.

The inciting incident is the pivotal moment in your story, where you realized your desire line. It could be a seemingly small moment, such as a brief fight with your mother, that becomes a major moment or inciting incident in your story. For example, your brief fight with your mother could be the last time you speak to her before she passes away and leaves you letters about her life in Poland. Think of the ah ha moment in your story when you realized what you wanted in your life, or where you realized you were wrong about your assumptions about a specific moment or event.
The ending incident is the moment when you achieve your desire line or want. It will also help you develop an ending for your book. It could be when you discover your mother’s reason for leaving her homeland, for example.

A story goal: The plot of any story is a sequence of events that revolve around an attempt to solve a problem or attain a goal. The story goal is what your narrator wants to achieve or the problem she wants to resolve, or her desire line.
The consequence(s): Ask yourself, What disaster will happen if the goal is not achieved? What is my protagonist afraid will happen if she doesn’t achieve the goal or solve the problem? The consequence is the negative situation or event that will result if the goal is not achieved. The combination of goal and consequence creates the main dramatic tension in your plot. It’s what makes the plot meaningful.
The requirements: These are what must be accomplished to achieve the goal. Think of it as a checklist of one or more events. As the requirements are met in the course of the novel, the reader will feel the narrator is getting closer to attaining the goal. Requirements create a sense of anticipation in the reader’s mind, as he looks forward to the narrator’s success.

You can conduct online research and use libraries, archives and record offices, newspapers, and microfilm. [7] X Research source
You may also interview “witnesses to events”. This means individuals who can share first person accounts of an event. You will then need to follow up on leads, interview people, transcribe interviews, and read a lot of material. [8] X Research source

Writing the Story

Try to organize your schedule around word count or page count. So, if you normally write about 750 words an hour, factor this in on your schedule. Or if you feel you may actually write two pages an hour, use this as an estimate in your schedule.
Determine how long it will take you on average to compose a set number of words, or number of pages, per a day. If you are working towards a final word count goal, like 50,000 words or 200 pages, focus on how many hours per a week it will take you to reach this goal. [10] X Research source

Use your plot outline to get a general sense of where your writing might be heading. But let yourself explore scenes in your rough draft. Don’t worry about writing perfect sentences or scenes. Instead, use your memory to create moments that feel true to you.

Use your grammar check (or an app like Hemingway app [12] X Research source ) to count the number of passive sentences in your manuscript. Aim for 2-4% maximum.

Step 4 Stick to informal language, unless it’s absolutely necessary to use formal terms.

It may help to identify the reading level of the ideal reader of your book. You can determine the reading level based on the grade level of your ideal reader. If you account for ESL readers, you should aim for a grade 6 or 7 reading level. If you are writing for a higher education audience, you may write at a grade 8 or 9 level. You can use the Hemingway app to determine the reading level of your draft, or other online reading level tools. [13] X Research source

Don't try to impress your listeners or put on a "reading voice". Just read a natural, slow way. Ask for a reaction from your listeners after you finish reading. Note if there were sections that felt confusing or unclear to your listeners.

Don't be afraid to cut at least 20% of the material. You can likely get rid of certain sections that go on for a bit too long and cause the reader to tune out. Don't be shy about cutting chapter sections or pages that may be deadweight.
Note if each scene in your book uses the power of the senses. Are you engaging at least one of the reader's senses in each scene? The power of enhancement through the senses (taste, touch, smell, sight, and hearing) is a trick both nonfiction and fiction writers can use to keep the reader interested.
Check the timeline of the book. Did you follow your desire line all the way through to the end of your book? Does the ending of your book leave the reader with a sense of closure or achievement?
The sentence level. Check for the transitions between paragraphs, are they smooth or jumpy? Look for any overused adverbs or terms and replace them so the sentences don't start to feel redundant.

Community Q&A

↑ https://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/roiphe/2013/01/bad_memoir_writing_rules_for_doing_it_well.html
↑ https://www.writersdigest.com/writing-articles/by-writing-goal/improve-my-writing/elements-of-an-effective-arc
↑ https://www.how-to-write-a-book-now.com/plot-outline.html
↑ https://www.huffingtonpost.com/lj-charleston/how-to-write-memoir_b_7853654.html
↑ https://www.writersdigest.com/write-better-nonfiction/8-ways-to-prepare-to-write-your-nonfiction-book-in-a-month
↑ http://www.theguardian.com/books/2010/mar/20/thirties-intimate-history-juliet-gardiner
↑ https://goinswriter.com/tips-writing-book/
↑ https://theamericanscholar.org/how-to-write-a-memoir/#.VcQ7AEJVikp
↑ https://www.hemingwayapp.com/
↑ https://readability-score.com/
↑ https://quentinschultze.com/tips-1-5-for-book-writers/
↑ https://www.writersdigest.com/getting-published/what-to-look-for-when-editing-your-manuscript

About This Article

To write a captivating story about your own life, read autobiographies and memoirs to help you understand how to structure your own story. When you’re ready to start writing, think about the major goals and motivations that define your life story, such as your desire to connect with your family or your goal of becoming a great writer. From there, consider some of the key events of your life and some of the obstacles you’ve faced. You can use these building blocks to start outlining your plot. Scroll down for more tips from our Writing co-author, including how to draft and polish up your manuscript! Did this summary help you? Yes No

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College essay

How to Write About Yourself in a College Essay | Examples

Published on September 21, 2021 by Kirsten Courault . Revised on May 31, 2023.

An insightful college admissions essay requires deep self-reflection, authenticity, and a balance between confidence and vulnerability. Your essay shouldn’t just be a resume of your experiences; colleges are looking for a story that demonstrates your most important values and qualities.

To write about your achievements and qualities without sounding arrogant, use specific stories to illustrate them. You can also write about challenges you’ve faced or mistakes you’ve made to show vulnerability and personal growth.

Start with self-reflection, how to write about challenges and mistakes, how to write about your achievements and qualities, how to write about a cliché experience, other interesting articles, frequently asked questions about college application essays.

Before you start writing, spend some time reflecting to identify your values and qualities. You should do a comprehensive brainstorming session, but here are a few questions to get you started:

What are three words your friends or family would use to describe you, and why would they choose them?
Whom do you admire most and why?
What are the top five things you are thankful for?
What has inspired your hobbies or future goals?
What are you most proud of? Ashamed of?

As you self-reflect, consider how your values and goals reflect your prospective university’s program and culture, and brainstorm stories that demonstrate the fit between the two.

Prevent plagiarism. Run a free check.

Writing about difficult experiences can be an effective way to show authenticity and create an emotional connection to the reader, but choose carefully which details to share, and aim to demonstrate how the experience helped you learn and grow.

Be vulnerable

It’s not necessary to have a tragic story or a huge confession. But you should openly share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences to evoke an emotional response from the reader. Even a cliché or mundane topic can be made interesting with honest reflection. This honesty is a preface to self-reflection and insight in the essay’s conclusion.

Don’t overshare

With difficult topics, you shouldn’t focus too much on negative aspects. Instead, use your challenging circumstances as a brief introduction to how you responded positively.

Share what you have learned

It’s okay to include your failure or mistakes in your essay if you include a lesson learned. After telling a descriptive, honest story, you should explain what you learned and how you applied it to your life.

While it’s good to sell your strengths, you also don’t want to come across as arrogant. Instead of just stating your extracurricular activities, achievements, or personal qualities, aim to discreetly incorporate them into your story.

Brag indirectly

Mention your extracurricular activities or awards in passing, not outright, to avoid sounding like you’re bragging from a resume.

Use stories to prove your qualities

Even if you don’t have any impressive academic achievements or extracurriculars, you can still demonstrate your academic or personal character. But you should use personal examples to provide proof. In other words, show evidence of your character instead of just telling.

Many high school students write about common topics such as sports, volunteer work, or their family. Your essay topic doesn’t have to be groundbreaking, but do try to include unexpected personal details and your authentic voice to make your essay stand out .

To find an original angle, try these techniques:

Focus on a specific moment, and describe the scene using your five senses.
Mention objects that have special significance to you.
Instead of following a common story arc, include a surprising twist or insight.

Your unique voice can shed new perspective on a common human experience while also revealing your personality. When read out loud, the essay should sound like you are talking.

If you want to know more about academic writing , effective communication , or parts of speech , make sure to check out some of our other articles with explanations and examples.

Academic writing

Writing process
Transition words
Passive voice
Paraphrasing

Communication

How to end an email
Ms, mrs, miss
How to start an email
I hope this email finds you well
Hope you are doing well

Parts of speech

Personal pronouns
Conjunctions

First, spend time reflecting on your core values and character . You can start with these questions:

However, you should do a comprehensive brainstorming session to fully understand your values. Also consider how your values and goals match your prospective university’s program and culture. Then, brainstorm stories that illustrate the fit between the two.

When writing about yourself , including difficult experiences or failures can be a great way to show vulnerability and authenticity, but be careful not to overshare, and focus on showing how you matured from the experience.

Through specific stories, you can weave your achievements and qualities into your essay so that it doesn’t seem like you’re bragging from a resume.

Include specific, personal details and use your authentic voice to shed a new perspective on a common human experience.

Cite this Scribbr article

If you want to cite this source, you can copy and paste the citation or click the “Cite this Scribbr article” button to automatically add the citation to our free Citation Generator.

Courault, K. (2023, May 31). How to Write About Yourself in a College Essay | Examples. Scribbr. Retrieved March 12, 2024, from https://www.scribbr.com/college-essay/write-about-yourself/

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Personal Essay Topics

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Writing Essays
Writing Research Papers
English Grammar
M.Ed., Education Administration, University of Georgia
B.A., History, Armstrong State University

A personal essay is an essay about your life, thoughts, or experiences. This type of essay will give readers a glimpse into your most intimate life experiences and life lessons. There are many reasons you may need to write a personal essay , from a simple class assignment to a college application requirement . You can use the list below for inspiration. Consider each statement a starting point, and write about a memorable moment that the prompt brings to mind.

Your bravest moment
How you met your best friend
What makes your mom or dad special
How you overcame a fear
Why you will succeed
Why you made a difficult choice
A special place
A place you try to avoid
When a friend let you down
An event that changed your life
A special encounter with an animal
A time when you felt out of place
An odd experience that didn't make sense at the time
Words of wisdom that hit home and changed your way of thinking
A person that you do not like
A time when you disappointed someone
Your fondest memory
A time when you saw your parent cry
The moment when you knew you were grown up
Your earliest memory of holiday celebrations in your home
Times when you should have made a better choice
A time when you dodged a dangerous situation
A person you will think about at the end of your life
Your favorite time period
A failure you've experienced
A disappointment you've experienced
A surprising turn of events
What you would do with power
What superpower you would choose
If you could switch lives with someone
How money matters in your life
Your biggest loss
A time when you felt you did the wrong thing
A proud moment when you did the right thing
An experience that you've never shared with another person
A special place that you shared with a childhood friend
A first encounter with a stranger
Your first handshake
Where you go to hide
If you had a do-over
A book that changed your life
Words that stung
When you had the desire to run
When you had the urge to crawl into a hole
Words that prompted hope
When a child taught you a lesson
Your proudest moment
If your dog could talk
Your favorite time with family
If you could live in another country
If you could invent something
The world a hundred years from now
If you had lived a hundred years earlier
The animal you'd like to be
One thing you'd change at your school
The greatest movie moment
The type of teacher you would be
If you could be a building
A statue you'd like to see
If you could live anywhere
The greatest discovery
If you could change one thing about yourself
An animal that could be in charge
Something you can do that robots could never do
Your most unfortunate day
Your secret talent
Your secret love
The most beautiful thing you've ever seen
The ugliest thing you've seen
Something you've witnessed
An accident that changed everything
A wrong choice
A right choice
If you were a food
How you'd spend a million dollars
If you could start a charity
The meaning of color
A close call
Your favorite gift
A chore you'd do away with
A secret place
Something you can't resist
A hard lesson
A visitor you'll never forget
An unexplained event
Your longest minute
An awkward social moment
An experience with death
Why you'll never tell a lie
If your mom knew, she'd kill you
A kiss that meant a lot
When you needed a hug
The hardest news you've had to deliver
A special morning
How to Write a Narrative Essay or Speech
What Is an Autobiography?
How to Ace Your University of Wisconsin Personal Statements
7 Law School Personal Statement Topic Ideas
Expository Essay Genre With Suggested Prompts
Tips for the Pre-2013 Personal Essay Options on the Common Application
50 Topics for Impromptu Student Speeches
24 Journal Prompts for Creative Writing in the Elementary Classroom
Writing Prompts for Elementary School Students
Tips for Writing an Essay on an Event That Led to Personal Growth
Do You Know What to Do If You Fail a Test in College?
The 2021-22 Common Application Essay Prompts
How to Write a Personal Narrative
Compose a Narrative Essay or Personal Statement
61 General Expository Essay Topic Ideas to Practice Academic Writing
Bad Essay Topics for College Admissions

How to Write an Essay about Your Life

Writing an essay about your life can be a great way to reflect on your experiences, values, and personal growth, especially if you know where to start. So, whether you’re writing a college application or an autobiographical essay, this tutorial is perfect for you!

I’m Constance, and I will show you how to write an essay about your life in five simple steps. I will give you tips, and we’ll write an example of such an essay, too!

Let’s begin!

Step 1. Plan your word count.

Planning the word count for each paragraph in your essay is a great way to organize your thoughts. As a result, it will help write any essay much quicker and simpler.

Here are three elements you must include in your essay:

The introductory paragraph
Three body paragraphs
The concluding paragraph

For example, you can follow the diagram below to distribute 300 words across the five paragraphs in a 300-word essay:

Step 2. Determine the main idea and three supporting points.

Before you write the paragraphs, you must choose a main idea that you will use as the basis of your essay.

To do this, you can consider three things in your life that you want to highlight in your essay. Then, think about why you want to talk about them. Do these three things play a significant role in your life? Do they positively or negatively affect your life?

Whatever it is, you must choose only one main idea that will overarch the three things you want to highlight in the body paragraphs. It will be your essay’s thesis .

For example, we can use this as our sample essay’s thesis: “My family, education, and personal experiences have shaped me into a responsible and interesting person.”

Next, you’ll divide the thesis using the Power of Three to keep your ideas flowing.

The Power of Three is a three-part structure that divides your thesis into three supporting points. It helps you produce your essay’s body paragraphs.

Why three? Because three is the perfect number — it’s not too many, not too few. And it always works!

For example, we could use these three supporting points for our essay:

My family plays an important role in my life.
My education has been a key to my personal growth.
My personal experiences have enriched my life in many ways.

Note that although they are all related to the main idea, “My family, education, and personal experiences have shaped me into a responsible and interesting person,” they are distinct.

Excellent! Now we’re ready for step three.

Step 3. Write the introductory paragraph.

After you get a general idea of what you want to write in your essay using the thesis and three supporting points, you can write the introductory paragraph . Here are what you need to include:

The first sentence ( introduction ) should catch your readers’ attention and make them want to know about your life. The rest of the paragraph will be your thesis and the three supporting points.

Here’s an example:

Introductory Paragraph

“Our lives are shaped by various influences that help us become who we are today. My family, education, and personal experiences have shaped me into a responsible and interesting person. My family has always provided me with invaluable guidance and support. My education has given me the skills and knowledge to pursue my passions and interests. And my personal experiences enriched my life with lessons that have molded the person I am now.”

Following the diagram above, our introductory paragraph proceeds from a general statement to more specific points, from the introduction to the thesis and its three supporting ideas.

Step 4. Write the body paragraphs.

Now that you have an introductory paragraph, you can write the body paragraphs , which will expand each supporting point into a paragraph. Here’s a diagram you can follow:

When writing a body paragraph, you will start with a topic sentence , which summarizes the entire paragraph. Then, you will explain your point and illustrate it using example/s .

Paragraph 1

“My family plays an important role in my life. They have always been there for me, providing guidance and support. I have also learned from their experiences and gained valuable insights. One example of this is when I decided to pursue a career change. I was feeling anxious and overwhelmed, but my parents and siblings were there to listen to me and give me sound advice. They helped me weigh the pros and cons and encouraged me to follow my calling.”

Note how the topic sentence gives context to the entire paragraph and briefly summarizes it. The rest explains it and illustrates the point using an example.

Paragraph 2

“My education has been a key to my personal growth. It has helped me develop skills and qualities that opened doors to opportunities. It has not only enhanced my knowledge but also helped me become a more confident and responsible individual. Pursuing professional teaching units has been a crucial part of my growth. It has helped me develop my communication and critical thinking skills and gain a deeper understanding of teaching methodologies. It has also boosted my self-esteem and empowered me to continue achieving my goal of becoming an educator.”

Paragraph 3

“My personal experiences have enriched my life in many ways. They have made me more well-rounded and given me a deeper sense of purpose and fulfillment in life. For example, volunteering has taught me the importance of giving back and has helped me develop empathy and compassion for others. I remember volunteering for various projects our church has conducted, such as educational, feeding, and gift-giving programs. Through my interactions with numerous people, I gained an understanding of the struggles they faced, and it motivated me to give back to my community in more meaningful ways.”

Note how paragraphs 1 and 2 also follow the diagram’s structured outline, which proceeds from general to specific .

Finally, we’re ready for the final step in writing an essay.

Step 5. Write the concluding paragraph.

Paraphrasing your introductory paragraph is the simplest way to write an essay’s concluding paragraph . It’s also a time-proven technique, so it’s always effective!

Let’s see how it works for our sample essay:

Concluding Paragraph

“Different factors influence our lives and help form who we are now. My family, education, and personal experiences have molded me into a responsible and interesting individual. My family constantly gives me priceless love and support. My education equips me and enables me to open doors to opportunities. And my personal experiences have imparted insights and lessons that shaped the person I am today.”

As I mentioned, our concluding paragraph only restated the points in the introductory paragraph but was worded differently.

And we’re done! I hope you learned a lot from this tutorial. Now go ahead and write your essay about your life!

Tutor Phil is an e-learning professional who helps adult learners finish their degrees by teaching them academic writing skills.

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