memoir writing for dummies

How to Write a Memoir: Examples and a Step-by-Step Guide

We start the road to writing a memoir when we realize that a story in our lives demands to be told. As Maya Angelou once wrote, “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”

How to write a memoir? At first glance, it looks easy enough—easier, in any case, than writing fiction. After all, there is no need to make up a story or characters, and the protagonist is none other than you.

Still, memoir writing carries its own unique challenges, as well as unique possibilities that only come from telling your own true story. Let’s dive into how to write a memoir by looking closely at the craft of memoir writing, starting with a key question: exactly what is a memoir?

What is a Memoir?

A memoir is a branch of creative nonfiction , a genre defined by the writer Lee Gutkind as “true stories, well told.” The etymology of the word “memoir,” which comes to us from the French, tells us of the human urge to put experience to paper, to remember. Indeed, a memoir is “ something written to be kept in mind .”

A memoir is defined by Lee Gutkind as “true stories, well told.”

For a piece of writing to be called a memoir, it has to be:

Nonfictional
Based on the raw material of your life and your memories
Written from your personal perspective

At this point, memoirs are beginning to sound an awful lot like autobiographies. However, a quick comparison of Elizabeth Gilbert’s Eat, Pray, Love , and The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin , for example, tells us that memoirs and autobiographies could not be more distinct.

Next, let’s look at the characteristics of a memoir and what sets memoirs and autobiographies apart. Discussing memoir vs. autobiography will not only reveal crucial insights into the process of writing a memoir, but also help us to refine our answer to the question, “What is a memoir?”

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Memoir vs. Autobiography

While both use personal life as writing material, there are five key differences between memoir and autobiography:

1. Structure

Since autobiographies tell the comprehensive story of one’s life, they are more or less chronological. writing a memoir, however, involves carefully curating a list of personal experiences to serve a larger idea or story, such as grief, coming-of-age, and self-discovery. As such, memoirs do not have to unfold in chronological order.

While autobiographies attempt to provide a comprehensive account, memoirs focus only on specific periods in the writer’s life. The difference between autobiographies and memoirs can be likened to that between a CV and a one-page resume, which includes only select experiences.

The difference between autobiographies and memoirs can be likened to that between a CV and a one-page resume, which includes only select experiences.

Autobiographies prioritize events; memoirs prioritize the writer’s personal experience of those events. Experience includes not just the event you might have undergone, but also your feelings, thoughts, and reflections. Memoir’s insistence on experience allows the writer to go beyond the expectations of formal writing. This means that memoirists can also use fiction-writing techniques , such as scene-setting and dialogue , to capture their stories with flair.

4. Philosophy

Another key difference between the two genres stems from the autobiography’s emphasis on facts and the memoir’s reliance on memory. Due to memory’s unreliability, memoirs ask the reader to focus less on facts and more on emotional truth. In addition, memoir writers often work the fallibility of memory into the narrative itself by directly questioning the accuracy of their own memories.

Memoirs ask the reader to focus less on facts and more on emotional truth.

5. Audience

While readers pick up autobiographies to learn about prominent individuals, they read memoirs to experience a story built around specific themes. Memoirs, as such, tend to be more relatable, personal, and intimate. Really, what this means is that memoirs can be written by anybody!

Ready to be inspired yet? Let’s now turn to some memoir examples that have received widespread recognition and captured our imaginations!

Memoir Examples

If you’re looking to lose yourself in a book, the following memoir examples are great places to begin:

The Year of Magical Thinking , which chronicles Joan Didion’s year of mourning her husband’s death, is certainly one of the most powerful books on grief. Written in two short months, Didion’s prose is urgent yet lucid, compelling from the first page to the last. A few years later, the writer would publish Blue Nights , another devastating account of grief, only this time she would be mourning her daughter.
Patti Smith’s Just Kids is a classic coming-of-age memoir that follows the author’s move to New York and her romance and friendship with the artist Robert Maplethorpe. In its pages, Smith captures the energy of downtown New York in the late sixties and seventies effortlessly.
When Breath Becomes Air begins when Paul Kalanithi, a young neurosurgeon, is diagnosed with terminal cancer. Exquisite and poignant, this memoir grapples with some of the most difficult human experiences, including fatherhood, mortality, and the search for meaning.
A memoir of relationship abuse, Carmen Maria Machado’s In the Dream House is candid and innovative in form. Machado writes about thorny and turbulent subjects with clarity, even wit. While intensely personal, In the Dream House is also one of most insightful pieces of cultural criticism.
Twenty-five years after leaving for Canada, Michael Ondaatje returns to his native Sri Lanka to sort out his family’s past. The result is Running in the Family , the writer’s dazzling attempt to reconstruct fragments of experiences and family legends into a portrait of his parents’ and grandparents’ lives. (Importantly, Running in the Family was sold to readers as a fictional memoir; its explicit acknowledgement of fictionalization prevented it from encountering the kind of backlash that James Frey would receive for fabricating key facts in A Million Little Pieces , which he had sold as a memoir . )
Of the many memoirs published in recent years, Tara Westover’s Educated is perhaps one of the most internationally-recognized. A story about the struggle for self-determination, Educated recounts the writer’s childhood in a survivalist family and her subsequent attempts to make a life for herself. All in all, powerful, thought-provoking, and near impossible to put down.

While book-length memoirs are engaging reads, the prospect of writing a whole book can be intimidating. Fortunately, there are plenty of short, essay-length memoir examples that are just as compelling.

Short Memoir Examples

“ The Book of My Life ” offers a portrait of a professor that the writer, Aleksandar Hemon, once had as a child in communist Sarajevo. This memoir was collected into Hemon’s The Book of My Lives , a collection of essays about the writer’s personal history in wartime Yugoslavia and subsequent move to the US.
“The first time I cheated on my husband, my mother had been dead for exactly one week.” So begins Cheryl Strayed’s “ The Love of My Life ,” an essay that the writer eventually expanded into the best-selling memoir, Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail .
In “ What We Hunger For ,” Roxane Gay weaves personal experience and a discussion of The Hunger Games into a powerful meditation on strength, trauma, and hope. “What We Hunger For” can also be found in Gay’s essay collection, Bad Feminist .
A humorous memoir structured around David Sedaris and his family’s memories of pets, “ The Youth in Asia ” is ultimately a story about grief, mortality and loss. This essay is excerpted from the memoir Me Talk Pretty One Day , and a recorded version can be found here .

So far, we’ve 1) answered the question “What is a memoir?” 2) discussed differences between memoirs vs. autobiographies, 3) taken a closer look at book- and essay-length memoir examples. Next, we’ll turn the question of how to write a memoir.

How to Write a Memoir: A-Step-by-Step Guide

1. generate memoir ideas.

how to start a memoir? As with anything, starting is the hardest. If you’ve yet to decide what to write about, check out the “ I Remember ” writing prompt. Inspired by Joe Brainard’s memoir I Remember , this prompt is a great way to generate a list of memories. From there, choose one memory that feels the most emotionally charged and begin writing your memoir. It’s that simple! If you’re in need of more prompts, our Facebook group is also a great resource.

2. Begin drafting

My most effective advice is to resist the urge to start from “the beginning.” Instead, begin with the event that you can’t stop thinking about, or with the detail that, for some reason, just sticks. The key to drafting is gaining momentum . Beginning with an emotionally charged event or detail gives us the drive we need to start writing.

3. Aim for a “ shitty first draft ”

Now that you have momentum, maintain it. Attempting to perfect your language as you draft makes it difficult to maintain our impulses to write. It can also create self-doubt and writers’ block. Remember that most, if not all, writers, no matter how famous, write shitty first drafts.

Attempting to perfect your language as you draft makes it difficult to maintain our impulses to write.

4. Set your draft aside

Once you have a first draft, set it aside and fight the urge to read it for at least a week. Stephen King recommends sticking first drafts in your drawer for at least six weeks. This period allows writers to develop the critical distance we need to revise and edit the draft that we’ve worked so hard to write.

5. Reread your draft

While reading your draft, note what works and what doesn’t, then make a revision plan. While rereading, ask yourself:

What’s underdeveloped, and what’s superfluous.
Does the structure work?
What story are you telling?

6. Revise your memoir and repeat steps 4 & 5 until satisfied

Every piece of good writing is the product of a series of rigorous revisions. Depending on what kind of writer you are and how you define a draft,” you may need three, seven, or perhaps even ten drafts. There’s no “magic number” of drafts to aim for, so trust your intuition. Many writers say that a story is never, truly done; there only comes a point when they’re finished with it. If you find yourself stuck in the revision process, get a fresh pair of eyes to look at your writing.

7. Edit, edit, edit!

Once you’re satisfied with the story, begin to edit the finer things (e.g. language, metaphor , and details). Clean up your word choice and omit needless words , and check to make sure you haven’t made any of these common writing mistakes . Then, once your memoir is ready, send it out !

Learn How to Write a Memoir at Writers.com

Writing a memoir for the first time can be intimidating. But, keep in mind that anyone can learn how to write a memoir. Trust the value of your own experiences: it’s not about the stories you tell, but how you tell them. Most importantly, don’t give up!

Anyone can learn how to write a memoir.

If you’re looking for additional feedback, as well as additional instruction on how to write a memoir, check out our schedule of nonfiction classes . Now, get started writing your memoir!

Sean Glatch

12 comments.

Thank you for this website. It’s very engaging. I have been writing a memoir for over three years, somewhat haphazardly, based on the first half of my life and its encounters with ignorance (religious restrictions, alcohol, and inability to reach out for help). Three cities were involved: Boston as a youngster growing up and going to college, then Washington DC and Chicago North Shore as a married woman with four children. I am satisfied with some chapters and not with others. Editing exposes repetition and hopefully discards boring excess. Reaching for something better is always worth the struggle. I am 90, continue to be a recital pianist, a portrait painter, and a writer. Hubby has been dead for nine years. Together we lept a few of life’s chasms and I still miss him. But so far, my occupations keep my brain working fairly well, especially since I don’t smoke or drink (for the past 50 years).

Hi Mary Ellen,

It sounds like a fantastic life for a memoir! Thank you for sharing, and best of luck finishing your book. Let us know when it’s published!

Best, The writers.com Team

Hello Mary Ellen,

I am contacting you because your last name (Lavelle) is my middle name!

Being interested in genealogy I have learned that this was my great grandfathers wife’s name (Mary Lavelle), and that her family emigrated here about 1850 from County Mayo, Ireland. That is also where my fathers family came from.

Is your family background similar?

Hope to hear back from you.

Richard Lavelle Bourke

I am up to my eyeballs with a research project and report for a non-profit. And some paid research for an international organization. But as today is my 90th birthday, it is time to retire and write a memoir.

So I would like to join a list to keep track of future courses related to memoir / creative non-fiction writing.

Hi Frederick,

Happy birthday! And happy retirement as well. I’ve added your name and email to our reminder list for memoir courses–when we post one on our calendar, we’ll send you an email.

We’ll be posting more memoir courses in the near future, likely for the months of January and February 2022. We hope to see you in one!

Very interesting and informative, I am writing memoirs from my long often adventurous and well travelled life, have had one very short story published. Your advice on several topics will be extremely helpful. I write under my schoolboy nickname Barnaby Rudge.

[…] How to Write a Memoir: Examples and a Step-by-Step Guide […]

I am writing my memoir from my memory when I was 5 years old and now having left my birthplace I left after graduation as a doctor I moved to UK where I have been living. In between I have spent 1 year in Canada during my training year as paediatrician. I also spent nearly 2 years with British Army in the hospital as paediatrician in Germany. I moved back to UK to work as specialist paediatrician in a very busy general hospital outside London for the next 22 years. Then I retired from NHS in 2012. I worked another 5 years in Canada until 2018. I am fully retired now

I have the whole convoluted story of my loss and horrid aftermath in my head (and heart) but have no clue WHERE, in my story to begin. In the middle of the tragedy? What led up to it? Where my life is now, post-loss, and then write back and forth? Any suggestions?

My friend Laura who referred me to this site said “Start”! I say to you “Start”!

I really enjoyed this writing about memoir. I ve just finished my own about my journey out of my city then out of my country to Egypt to study, Never Say Can’t, God Can Do It. Infact memoir writing helps to live the life you are writing about again and to appreciate good people you came across during the journey. Many thanks for sharing what memoir is about.

I am a survivor of gun violence, having witnessed my adult son being shot 13 times by police in 2014. I have struggled with writing my memoir because I have a grandson who was 18-months old at the time of the tragedy and was also present, as was his biological mother and other family members. We all struggle with PTSD because of this atrocity. My grandson’s biological mother was instrumental in what happened and I am struggling to write the story in such a way as to not cast blame – thus my dilemma in writing the memoir. My grandson was later adopted by a local family in an open adoption and is still a big part of my life. I have considered just writing it and waiting until my grandson is old enough to understand all the family dynamics that were involved. Any advice on how I might handle this challenge in writing would be much appreciated.

Memoir Writing For Dummies

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Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides hopeful writers with the tools they need to share their life stories with the world and become published authors.

With easy-to-follow, step-by-step instructions—along with helpful tips and advice on how to get published— Memoir Writing For Dummies shows you how to put pen to paper and hone the craft of writing a truly compelling memoir. You'll get advice on how to explore your memories, map out your story, perfect your plot, setting, character, and dialogue, and so much more.

Includes tips on getting over writer's block
Guides you through every step of the writing and editing processes
Covers the best ways to market a finished memoir

Packed with proven tips and writing tricks of the trade, Memoir Writing For Dummies gives you everything you need to ensure your life story is never forgotten.

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Product details, about the author, table of contents.

Part I: The First Steps to Writing a Memoir 7

Chapter 1: The Lowdown on Memoir Writing: Just the Basics 9

Chapter 2: Getting Started: What You Need to Know about Writing Your Memoir 17

Chapter 3: Understanding What Readers Expect: The Story Behind a Good Story 35

Chapter 4: Researching and Remembering: Gathering Enough Material 47

Chapter 5: Developing Ideas like the Pros 61

Part II: Telling Your Story with Pizzazz 75

Chapter 6: Giving Your Story Some Structure77

Chapter 7: Establishing the Setting and Scene 93

Chapter 8: The Character of Characters 111

Chapter 9: Making the Most of Dialogue 129

Chapter 10: Realizing the Power of Voice 153

Chapter 11: Handling Point of View 165

Chapter 12: Bold Beginnings and Fantastic Finishes 179

Part III: Revising, Editing, and Pushing Your Story to the Next Level 193

Chapter 13: Adjusting the Big Picture: Fine-Tuning Structure and Story 195

Chapter 14: Ensuring the Theme and Meaning Are What You Want 207

Chapter 15: Making Revisions 221

Chapter 16: Streamlining Your Story with Sentence-Level Edits 231

Chapter 17: Saying the Unsayable: Knowing What to Include or Exclude 251

Part IV: Sharing Your Story: A Publishing Primer 263

Chapter 18: Locating and Landing a Literary Agent 265

Chapter 19: Making Sense of Traditional Publishing and the Submission Process 281

Chapter 20: Going It Alone: Self-Publishing and E-Publishing 299

Chapter 21: Promoting Your Finished Product (and Yourself) 317

Part V: The Part of Tens 333

Chapter 22: Ten Myths about Memoirs 335

Chapter 23: Ten Reasons Memoirs Are Rejected 341

Chapter 24: Ten Tips to Writing Your First Book 347

Index 353

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Memoir Writing For Dummies

Includes tips on getting over writer's block
Guides you through every step of the writing and editing processes
Covers the best ways to market a finished memoir

Packed with proven tips and writing tricks of the trade, Memoir Writing For Dummies gives you everything you need to ensure your life story is never forgotten.

Writing a memoir means you’re author and subject, researcher and storyteller, narrator and audience. That’s a lot to ask of any writer, though a good way to begin the challenge of writing a memoir is to start a list of the most memorable events of your life. Don’t start on the actual book manuscript until you have at least a page filled with things that seem worthy of sharing — moments from your past that have universal significance, emotional resonance, or high drama. Add another half page of small moments you treasure. Those can speak surprisingly well to those larger themes, too.

About The Author

Ryan G. Van Cleave, PhD , is the author of 20 books, including creative writing textbooks, an illustrated humor book, a young adult novel, and a bestselling memoir.?He lives in Sarasota, Florida, where he works as an international speaker, a freelance writer, and the creative writing coordinator for The Ringling College of Art + Design. He has taught memoir writing at numerous universities as well as at prisons, community centers, and urban at-risk youth programs.

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With easy-to-follow, step-by-step instructions―along with helpful tips and advice on how to get published― Memoir Writing For Dummies shows you how to put pen to paper and hone the craft of writing a truly compelling memoir. You'll get advice on how to explore your memories, map out your story, perfect your plot, setting, character, and dialogue, and so much more.

Includes tips on getting over writer's block
Guides you through every step of the writing and editing processes
Covers the best ways to market a finished memoir

Packed with proven tips and writing tricks of the trade, Memoir Writing For Dummies gives you everything you need to ensure your life story is never forgotten.

ISBN-10 1118414640
ISBN-13 978-1118414644
Edition 1st
Publisher For Dummies
Publication date 26 April 2013
Language English
Dimensions 18.54 x 2.54 x 23.11 cm
Print length 384 pages
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Product description

From the inside flap.

Mine your past for great stories
Choose the best structure to highlight your story
Get your memoir published
Market your finished memoir

Expert tips and strategies to help you craft your life story and get it published!

Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon — and it's not just for celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides you with the tools you need to share your life story with the world. With easy-to-follow, step-by-step instructions — along with helpful tips and advice on how to get published — Memoir Writing For Dummies shows you how to put pen to paper and hone the craft of writing a truly compelling memoir. You'll get advice on how to explore your memories, map out your story, perfect your plot, and so much more. Packed with proven tips and writing tricks of the trade, Memoir Writing For Dummies gives you everything you need to ensure your life story is never forgotten.

Remember the past — put on your research cap and uncover your memories
Get over writer's block — find out how to deal with distractions and focus on the task
Write your first draft — develop your structure, setting, characters, and dialogue
Edit your work — explore ways to push your story to the next level and make revisions like the pros
Get published — understand the publishing process and decide which route is right for you
Market your memoir — develop strategies to get the word out about your memoir

Open the book and find:

Ways to unlock your memories
Writing exercises in each chapter to improve your manuscript
How to use metaphor and figurative language
Strategies for fine-tuning your story
Tips for editing your work
How to find a literary agent
Understanding the difference between traditional publishing and self-publishing
Ways to promote your finished product

From the Back Cover

Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon and it's not just for celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides you with the tools you need to share your life story with the world. With easy-to-follow, step-by-step instructions along with helpful tips and advice on how to get published Memoir Writing For Dummies shows you how to put pen to paper and hone the craft of writing a truly compelling memoir. You'll get advice on how to explore your memories, map out your story, perfect your plot, and so much more. Packed with proven tips and writing tricks of the trade, Memoir Writing For Dummies gives you everything you need to ensure your life story is never forgotten.

Remember the past put on your research cap and uncover your memories
Get over writer's block find out how to deal with distractions and focus on the task
Write your first draft develop your structure, setting, characters, and dialogue
Edit your work explore ways to push your story to the next level and make revisions like the pros
Get published understand the publishing process and decide which route is right for you
Market your memoir develop strategies to get the word out about your memoir

About the Author

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ For Dummies; 1st edition (26 April 2013)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Paperback ‏ : ‎ 384 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1118414640
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1118414644
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 18.54 x 2.54 x 23.11 cm
327 in Authorship Reference
465 in History of Books
1,041 in Teaching & Learning Biographies

About the author

Ryan g. van cleave.

Ryan G. Van Cleave is the author of 20+ books of his own, and through his ghostwriting, coaching, teaching, and consulting, he's responsible for dozens more. Currently, he runs the Creative Writing major at Ringling College of Art and Design in Sarasota, FL. As the Picture Book Whisperer, he helps celebrity and executive clients write and publish kidlit books.

Visit him at:

www.ryangvancleave.com

www.facebook.com/ryangvancleavebooks

www.onlypicturebooks.com

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The fast and easy way to write your memoir

Includes tips on getting over writer's block
Guides you through every step of the writing and editing processes
Covers the best ways to market a finished memoir

Packed with proven tips and writing tricks of the trade, Memoir Writing For Dummies gives you everything you need to ensure your life story is never forgotten.

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Release Date: February 4, 2013
Imprint: For Dummies
ISBN: 9781118414675
Language: English
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Memoir Writing For Dummies

By Ryan Van Cleave

( 2 ratings )

About this ebook

Includes tips on getting over writer's block
Guides you through every step of the writing and editing processes
Covers the best ways to market a finished memoir

Packed with proven tips and writing tricks of the trade, Memoir Writing For Dummies gives you everything you need to ensure your life story is never forgotten.

Ryan Van Cleave

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Book preview

Memoir writing for dummies - ryan van cleave, the first steps to writing a memoir, in this part . . ..

Although you’re excited to plunge into the actual writing of your memoir, you need to do some preparatory reading, thinking, and writing before going any further. In this part, I explain the basic characteristics of a memoir, consider the reasons for writing a memoir, discuss the best ways to gather and shape material, and outline the basic structures available to create an effective story. I also delve deeply into a host of inspiration-building writing prompts and techniques to help you think of yourself as a writer as well as get you prepared to succeed with creating your own memoir.

The Lowdown on Memoir Writing: Just the Basics

In this chapter.

arrow Recognizing the characteristics of a memoir

arrow Identifying the elements of a memoir

arrow Revising and editing your memoir

arrow Getting your memoir published

arrow Knowing why you want to write a memoir

For a long time, writing a memoir was the province of celebrities and people living in retirement homes. Thanks to an explosion of exciting memoirs written by people of all ages, the memoir as a form is now a viable way for anyone to meaningfully share their story. There’s something incredibly rewarding to finding the leisure time to think, remember, reflect, and then write about your past. In doing so, you can discover the emotional truths that create the undercurrent of your life.

technicalstuff.eps The Bowker Industry Report shows that memoirs generated $170 million in sales in 1999, and nearly $300 million a decade later. That’s a lot more than just chump change! There’s a growing audience for memoirs and that’s good news for you.

This chapter serves as your stepping stone to everything you need to know about writing your memoir. Find the information you need here, depending on where you are in the writing process, to get your story down.

Although I’ve been a teacher of writing for nearly 20 years, I’m not coming to you as a teacher now. I’m simply someone who’s been down this path before and who’s willing to share the wisdom I’ve gained and gathered throughout the years. There are no grades, no deadlines, and no penalties for mistakes. What matters is that you commit to reaching across the chasm of memory and start retrieving the deep past, then recording it faithfully and vibrantly on the page. Memory by memory, moment by moment, you’ll see a story take shape and grow into something that is a lesson in compassion, understanding, and humanity. That’s memoir.

Understanding What Makes a Memoir a Memoir

The short answer for what makes a memoir a memoir is that like a novel, it tells a story, but unlike a novel, a memoir is 100 percent truthful. But that’s an insufficient definition. A memoir also has other obligations that make it unique and distinct from other literary utterances. Understanding those differences is to understand the memoir’s strengths. To know those is to know what areas you should play up when writing your own.

remember.eps In order to be considered a memoir, your book needs to be in-line with the following:

check.png Be book length. G enerally, a memoir is between 60,000 and 120,000 words.

check.png Limit what’s included: A memoir is focused on parts or elements of a life, whereas an autobiography strives to include everything about a life, from birth to death.

check.png Be truthful. You can’t play loose and free with the truth and still be called a memoir.

check.png Use the elements of narrative. Fiction writers know how to tell a story and make it interesting. See the next section for more on this.

check.png Show desire. A story gets interesting when the main character wants something — desperately so. Be specific and clear about what your main character wants, and readers will care.

check.png Have conflict. If a character can just get what he or she wants, who cares? That’s not drama, that’s grocery shopping. It’s when a character can’t get what he or she desires that things get interesting. Tell that story and you have the makings of a strong memoir.

Check out Chapter 2 for more information about the concepts of a memoir in far greater details.

Naming the Essential Parts of a Memoir

Like any good work of art, numerous parts comprise a memoir. Getting the best end product comes from knowing and having control over all of those smaller elements. Most of what a memoirist needs are skills borrowed from the world of fiction writing, though those skills are used somewhat differently in the world of nonfiction in general, and memoir in specific. For instance, you can’t generate more conflict to heighten reader interest in a chapter if the scene you’re writing simply didn’t have that level of conflict. You can’t reinvent the past to make a better story. With fiction, you can (and should).

Some of the main elements that make up a memoir include

check.png Structure: This is the shape of your story on the page. You may assume that the structure of your story has to be chronological, from beginning to end, but you have many more options than that. See Chapter 6 for the skinny.

check.png Setting: Setting is the where and when that a story takes place. A memoir may have two, three, or even as many as 23 different settings if you traveled or moved around a lot. Setting matters because it has a direct influence on character. See Chapter 7 for details on how to create and utilize setting to best effect.

check.png Characters: Characters are the people who populate the scenes and settings of your story. Yes, they’re real-life people, but memoirists still call them characters, as novelists do. For more on why as well as how to make them come alive on the page, visit Chapter 8.

check.png Dialogue: The conversations that your characters have are called dialogue . This is a particularly tricky thing to use in memoir because memory is imperfect. Who walks around recording all conversations so you can accurately quote people later? You can discover more about the challenges and strengths of dialogue use in memoirs in Chapter 9.

check.png Voice: Voice is the unique manner in which a writer writes. It comprises distinctive decisions, such as word choice, rhythm, and the way a writer says things — taken together, voice creates a powerful effect on the reader. Interested in knowing more? Chapter 10 covers voice in depth.

check.png Point of view: The perspective through which the story is seen is called point of view . This in an important choice because it can drastically change how your story is conveyed. Read more about point of view in Chapter 11.

check.png Theme: Theme is what your memoir is about. It speaks to universal truths, core ideas, and emotional truths through the development of key scenes, moments, and tensions in your story. See more about theme in Chapter 14.

Making the Necessary Revisions and Edits to Help Your Memoir Shine

A great memoir doesn’t appear by magic, but rather it’s the result of good revision (to get the big stuff under control) and careful editing (to get the little stuff under control). How often in life do you wish you had a Do Over button? With writing, you do. You get a second, a third, or tenth chance if you require it, which is good news because you can improve the mistakes and poor decisions that you made earlier in the writing process.

remember.eps After you have a rough draft of either your entire manuscript or even just a chapter, you can begin the revision process. Revision is important because it asks you to focus on large story elements without worrying much about specific word choices or sentence-level issues. While revising, you certainly look over all of the essential parts of a memoir (which I discuss in the previous section) to make sure each is functioning well on its own as well as connecting meaningfully to the entire book. You have another obligation, though. You need to think like a reader, not the writer. You handle revision first because you may revise and remove an entire chapter or scene from a book. You don’t need to spend the extra time polishing those sentences that won’t appear in the first edition. Stay efficient revising first and then editing after. Refer to Chapter 15 for more on making revisions.

Meanwhile there is also a time to edit, which is before you finish and start thinking of publication. Editing asks you to re-examine every word choice, reevaluate sentence structure, and think about how you’re using paragraphs. Editing is a sentence-by-sentence level of attention that can feel tedious, but it’s often the difference between a promising book that gets published or not. Some of the things that occur at this level of editing are adding or improving imagery, cutting clichés, removing most adverbs and adjectives, and tightening language across the board. Refer to Chapter 16 for more on line-by-line editing.

Focusing on the End Goal: Publishing

When I was in high school, an English teacher who recognized that I devoured F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby (Scribner), William Faulkner’s As I Lay Dying (Modern Library), and John Steinbeck’s The Grapes of Wrath (Penguin Classics), gave me a copy of Ernest Hemingway’s A Moveable Feast (Scribner). I was blown away by it as fully as I’d ever been by any work of fiction. This book had grace, excitement, lovely language, melancholy, and a nearly-perfect sense of the extraordinary place Paris was in the 1920s. And most impressive to me? It was all true.

From that point on, I recognized that part of my goal of being a writer wasn’t just to write a great memoir one day, but to have people read it and hopefully be swept up by that same kind of reaction I had to Hemingway. (A tall order, I realize, but it’s okay to dream big!) I wanted others to experience the same visceral sense of wonder and awe that I did about the past with Hemingway’s book. And the way to do that is through publishing your book. It’s your avenue to finding readers and inviting them into the magic of a story only you can share. These prospective readers won’t be sneaking into your house at night, rummaging in your file drawers or peeking into your computer files in pursuit of great literature. You have to send it to them, and the best way to do so is publishing.

Attending a writers’ conference

If you want some community with people who will understand your impulse to tell stories, consider attending a writers’ conference. There are hundreds of these throughout the country to choose from. Some specialize in the type of books they talk about, and others are more general. Here are just ten of the many writers’ conferences that might suit the needs of a memoir writer. Research each online for more information.

check.png Writers in Paradise (St. Petersburg, Florida)

check.png Antioch Writers’ Workshop (Yellow Springs, Ohio)

check.png San Miguel de Allende Writers’ Conference & Literary Festival (San Miguel de Allende, Mexico)

check.png Orange County Christian Writers Conference (Fullerton, California)

check.png Wesleyan Writers Conference (Middletown, Connecticut)

check.png Stonecoast Writers’ Conference (Portland, Maine)

check.png Taos Summer Writers’ Conference (Taos, New Mexico)

check.png Green Mountain Writers Conference (Tinmouth, Vermont)

check.png ArtsQuest Memoir Writing Conference (Bethlehem, Pennsylvania)

check.png Story Circle Network’s Annual Women’s Memoir Conference (Austin, Texas)

Check out the website for the National Association of Memoir Writers ( www.namw.org). Their Writing Resources link shows many online and real-world workshops and events all around the country.

Even if you decide your target audience is small — your family, or the people of your hometown — the idea of making something publishable quality is important. It means that it’s the best that you can make it. It means you’re understandably and honestly proud of it. It means that the writing you’ve labored over is likely to be engaging, memorable, and lasting for those special readers. And if you want to reach millions like Stephen King did with his memoir On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft (Scribner), publishing a well-written, publishable-quality book is your only way to approaching that size of an audience.

tip.eps Before you seek a publisher, you may want to seek advice and feedback from your peers or even a literary agent to ensure what you have is the best that it can be. A writing critique group can be a great help in terms of getting advice on the quality of writing or receiving revision ideas (see www.ryangvancleave.com/bonuschapter.pdf for a bonus chapter on writing groups). One step further, a literary agent can take this manuscript and showcase it to publishing houses that have the infrastructure in place to print your book and distribute it to online and real-world bookstores throughout the world. Chapter 18 provides more insight about what an agent can do for you.

You have a few publishing options when you’re ready to publish your book:

check.png Traditional publishing: For the last century or so, this is the main route that authors had to seek print book publication. You write the book, send a letter of inquiry (a query letter) to a publisher, and then hope for a positive response. If the publisher likes your letter, it asks for the manuscript. If the publisher likes the manuscript, it sends you a contract, and two years later (give or take), the memoir appears in bookstores. For more information on this time-honored option, Chapter 19 awaits.

check.png Self-publishing: If you’re interested in writing, printing, and selling your own memoir, then self-publishing is a fine choice. With 211,000 self-published books appearing in 2011 alone, other authors have clearly liked this choice a great deal. If self-publishing interests you as well, see Chapter 20.

check.png E-publishing: This is a subcategory of self-publishing that’s emerged as a viable outlet for books in the past few years. An e-book isn’t a print book, but with so many people having e-readers or e-reader capabilities on their computers, getting published in an e-book format is no longer a disincentive for an author. Chapter 20 has what you need to know about this new publishing option.

No matter what publishing method you decide on, you want to promote your finished work. If you don’t promote your memoir (for example, with a website for your book, or with social media to alert people that your book is available to purchase), then people won’t know about it and won’t buy it. In today’s publishing world, publishers do very little marketing and publicity for a book unless you’re getting a huge amount of money from them upfront; this reality shifts the responsibility for book marketing and publicity duties to your shoulder. Chapter 21 offers some great suggestions for promoting your book, whether you do it on your own or hire a professional to help out with some or all of it. With more than 4,000,000 new books (or new editions of existing books) published in 2011, you need to find ways to get the attention of readers.

Answering the Question: Why Do You Want to Write a Memoir?

People ask me all the time about why I ever chose to write a memoir. Why put yourself through that? Why put your family through that? They ask — sometimes by dancing around the topic, and sometimes saying it outright — why I’m interested in sharing pain and experiencing the potential shame of revealing secrets, mistakes, and transgressions?

If you’re serious about being a memoirist, be prepared to answer these questions. You need to be able to answer them yourself, in your own words, in a way that makes sense to you. Don’t duck the hard questions. Think them through and come to a sense of peace with your reasons, no matter what they are.

tip.eps Here’s something else you’ll encounter beyond those questions — even if you obscure the names of real-world people who appear in your book, your friends and family will make great effort to figure out who is who. Whether people guess at which character is them or if you use their names and exact likenesses, they will (a) feel proud to have been immortalized in print, (b) nitpick all the things about themselves that you got wrong, (c) feel a little exploited/violated, or (d) have some other reaction that’s impossible to predict.

Here are some of the most popular and self-justifying reasons to write a memoir. See if you identify with any of them. You want to

check.png Find some kind of meaning and order to the often-chaotic swirl of existence

check.png Discover who you really are by confronting the truth(s) of your life

check.png Be the star of the show versus remain someone who stands behind a curtain offstage, or worse, stays in the audience (or even worse, never arrives to the show at all)

check.png (Re)witness the most important stages of your life

check.png Overcome fear, guilt, shame, and regret

check.png Preserve your family’s history

check.png Improve your ability to communicate with others

check.png Build self-esteem through valuing yourself and listening to your own voice

check.png Figure out who you are

check.png Become a better thinker because good writing isn’t from the seat-of-your-pants; it’s from reflecting, making connections, and creatively engaging with your material

check.png Learn how to forgive yourself

check.png Create a deep empathetic connection with readers who will learn and be inspired from your life

check.png Confess something — confession is, as they say, good for the soul

check.png Defy the aphorism it’s all been said before, because you haven’t said it

To deny the validity of memoir is to deny that the past powerfully affects the present. Whether your past is full of darkness, bright with joy, or a chiaroscuro containing both, examining that and bringing the chaos of disarray (which memories generally are) into order can change lives for the better. I’ve seen it happen many, many times. Through the writing of a memoir, you can take full possession of your life — possibly for the first time. You don’t have to be famous. You don’t even have to be a professional writer. You just have to be honest, faithful to the past, and generous in the telling. That’s memoir.

Celebrity doesn’t sell memoirs

You don’t have to be a famous person to write a memoir. Still, your memoir will probably sell more copies if you won Dancing with the Stars or if your face has graced a box of Wheaties. But simply having celebrity is no guarantee that your memoir will sell and be successful. See this for yourself from this list of celebrity memoir stinkers:

check.png Jersey Shore star Snooki’s memoir only sold 4,000 copies during its first week. (She had more than a million Twitter followers at the time, and the premiere episode of season three of Jersey Shore drew almost 8.5 million viewers.)

check.png Wikileaks founder Julian Assange’s unauthorized biography barely sold 600 copies in its first week. He received a $1.5 million advance in 2011 for this title.

check.png Actor Alec Baldwin’s A Promise to Ourselves: A Journey through Fatherhood (St. Martin’s Griffin) is reported to have sold only 13,000 hardcover copies in four years.

Although having a famous person’s name attached to a book can guarantee a few sales, a bad book is a bad book, period. After people figure that out, the sales will scream to a stop.

A well-written, honest, interesting memoir, however, can actually make you a celebrity. Amy Chua, the author of Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother (Penguin Press), received a ton of media attention over how she humorously portrayed the superiority of super-strict Chinese mothers. That attention turned into huge sales for the book and made Chua a prominent media figure.

Getting Started: What You Need to Know about Writing Your Memoir

arrow Recognizing why people write memoirs

arrow Allowing yourself to write

arrow Ignoring fame and fortune

arrow Exploring the vaults of memory

arrow Considering the role of reading

Writing a memoir is a noble endeavor that involves the author in ways that poetry, fiction, and other types of nonfiction simply don’t. With a memoir, you, the author, are front and center with the spotlight burning down from above, and the world is watching — waiting and expectant.

Question: What type of person volunteers to put him or herself under that kind of scrutiny?

Answer: Writers who want to create, discover, witness, preserve, and uncover something real and honest about themselves and their past.

What makes memoirs even more alluring is that people like to read real-life stories. Memoir isn’t just based on true events; it is true events. And thus, readers feel more is at stake.

This chapter identifies the main reasons why people yearn to write memoirs. It also covers some of the main challenges as well as the rewards memoir writers may encounter. The final part of this chapter examines the role that reading plays in any writer’s development.

Figuring Out Why Anyone Would Want to Write a Memoir

Before you set pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard), though, I want to explain why people write memoirs. They obviously write memoirs for various reasons. Knowing why you’re writing one can help determine your intended outcome. If you don’t have a clear target, you can’t expect to hit the bull’s-eye. Read on to see which one(s) resonate with you most clearly.

You’re an authority in your field (or you aspire to be one)

Say that you’ve been involved with helping senior citizens re-enter the workforce so they can have a higher standard of living, keep active and healthy, and be financially able to get better insurance than the government offers. To help the most people, you need to reach a lot of people, right? Writing a memoir that details your life and how you came to commit yourself to helping this particular demographic of citizens can do exactly that. In this hypothetical memoir, you’d probably detail a few of the most compelling stories you had about helping someone find a life-changing job at age 60 (or 70, or 80). Anyone reading the book may well take away a few how-to tips from those case studies alone, which is a good thing.

A possible outcome for a memoir like this is media coverage. A well-written memoir on any topic can net the author radio and TV interviews, magazine stories, blog write-ups, and word-of-mouth. A good memoir can help raise awareness of what you do in a very big way.

You could then follow up your memoir with a good self-help or how-to nonfiction book, and you’re even closer to cornering the market on your topic.

Here are a few other success stories where a published memoir helped establish someone as an authority on his or her topic:

check.png Elie Wiesel’s Night (Hill and Wang): It’s considered one of the bedrocks of Holocaust literature.

check.png David Pelzer’s A Child Called It : One Child’s Courage to Survive (HCI): This 1995 memoir of childhood abuse led him to write other books and become a highly-paid motivational speaker.

check.png David Mura’s Turning Japanese: Memoirs of a Sansei (Atlantic Monthly Press) and Where the Body Meets Memory: An Odyssey of Race, Sexuality & Identity (Anchor): Mura, a third-generation Japanese-American, gives educational presentations at schools, businesses, and organizations. His events combine poetry, presentation, and personal testament that tackle some of the most powerful cultural issues faced today.

You have a powerful, unique story to share

Another reason authors seek to write a memoir is to share their incredible story. Say for instance, you cured whooping cough. You took a snowboard journey across the Arctic. You won 35 blueberry pie eating contests in the past two years, and you still fit into a size zero miniskirt. You developed a blackjack strategy that helped you take Las Vegas casinos for $35 million. You swam from Hawaii to Australia . . . and you’re blind!

If you did any of these things — or something equally amazing — you should write a memoir so other people learn about it. Your barber knows, as does the fellow in the cubicle next to you at work, and maybe the kid who delivers your newspaper does too, but the rest of the world doesn’t. The rest of the world salivates for amazing real-life stories like yours. It makes everyone feel warm and squishy inside when they see the heights the human spirit can achieve.

Here are a few examples of this type of memoir:

check.png Isobella Jade’s Almost 5’4 (Gamine Press): This book details her struggles with being one of the smallest models in the business. Even more amazing was that she wrote it at the Apple Store on Prince Street in Soho, because she was homeless and living on McDonald’s dollar menu items.

check.png Ernesto Che Guevara’s The Motorcycle Diaries: Notes on a Latin American Journey (Ocean Press): This book, which has been a New York Times bestseller multiple times, details Che’s travels across South America with his biochemist friend. Together, they witnessed so much social injustice that Guevara became an iconic revolutionary for the rest of his life.

check.png Julie Metz’s Perfection: A Memoir of Betrayal and Renewal (Voice): Seven months after her husband dropped dead, she found out that he’d been cheating. So this brutally honest memoir recounts how Metz does what every cheated-on person dreams of — she hunted down and confronted every single woman. (Although the situation of being cheated on isn’t that unique, how she handled it indeed was.)

Legitimized my story: My own authority-figure experience

A few weeks after my own memoir ( Unplugged ) came out, I was invited out of the blue to do a three-hour interview with George Noory on Coast to Coast, a radio program that averages three million listeners. After the interview, the Amazon sales ranking for my book jumped from more than one million to well under 1,000 and stayed there for quite some time. And from that single interview, I got three invitations to do other radio interviews and dozens of requests for advice on my topic from regular people. Because of that single book, I have more speaking event opportunities than I can possibly do, and I’ve been on shows like Dr. Drew, Issues with Jane Velez-Mitchell, and ABC News. I’ve even had an Associated Press story on me that ran in more than 100 newspapers and appeared in 15+ countries. In essence, writing this one book made me an authority on my topic — video games and video game addiction — overnight.

If I didn’t have a book published on this subject, I wouldn’t have been featured in all those media outlets. I didn’t get any more knowledgeable on my subject by virtue of writing or publishing a book — I knew the same stuff before. But the book validated it in a public way that people understand and respect. A memoir can make you seem more legitimate in their eyes.

You want to understand/know yourself better

Self-knowledge is a great goal, and more people seek this goal as they mature. Writing a memoir is the careful observation of your inner world. Stick it out through the entire process, and you’ll have a much stronger handle on who you are, what you’re about, what you believe in, and why you’re the person you are today.

remember.eps A real benefit of this reason for writing a memoir is that publication for the masses isn’t a huge motivation. You may even choose to keep the final book-length product in the family, or amongst a select group of friends, which is no problem. Make sure you do read the chapters on publication, just in case. Told well, any memoir has value to others.

You want to document your life

If you’re like most people, around age 50 you start to realize how much you didn’t know about your parents, and their parents, and their parents, all of whom are likely no longer with you. You’ve lost access to a rich, meaningful past that is part of your family’s legacy. You don’t have to be a genius to realize that your own kids or other family members might one day feel the same way.

tip.eps You can use the writing of a memoir as an opportunity to document yourself and your experiences. Keep your story — your family’s story — immune to the ravages of time. Plus you just might build family unity, create memories, and establish traditions for generations to come along the way.

remember.eps Families with rich oral histories can benefit from this type of reason for writing a memoir. For that type of book, a lot of Q&A may be effective because it’ll capture the tempo and tenor of people’s speech. It’ll place the stories in a strong social context that you won’t have to develop as much in exposition.

You want to set the record straight

People write this type of memoir to clarify the truth of an event or series of events. For most people, this reason isn’t the main one for writing a memoir unless they were thrown out of office, accused of a sordid sex scandal, or falsely imprisoned for 11 years for a hate crime.

Although you can try to get your record-setting story out via newspapers, radio, TV, and the Internet, none of those options has the respect and lasting power of a well-published, well-written book. In fact, publishing a book that details the true account of how you didn’t do something will likely earn you plenty of media coverage, but the reverse isn’t always true. Plenty of people get a radio interview or two-minutes on a TV show to tell their side of a story, and that doesn’t lead to a book deal. So just write the book in the first place and utilize the publicity techniques in Chapter 21 to know with confidence that you’re taking the best option to revise the incorrect truth most people believe.

Some memoirists aren’t trying to show that the events are untrue, but rather set the record straight by offering the full context that created the events. Some readers and critics may see this as the author trying to absolve himself or herself of guilt or culpability, which is okay. Giving people a fuller appreciation for something that happened is a fine motive for writing a memoir.

A few examples of this type of book include

check.png Jose Baez and Peter Golenbock’s Presumed Guilty: Casey Anthony, The Inside Story (BenBella Books): Here, Anthony’s lawyer says Florida detectives should’ve realized Casey Anthony wasn’t playing with a full deck.

check.png Courtney Love’s untitled forthcoming memoir: In this tell-all, Love gives the real scoop on her life with Kurt Cobain, his suicide in 1994, her own drug problems, and her Hollywood career. Her goal is to get past all the tabloid falsehoods and literally set the record straight, as she explained to the Associated Press.

check.png Michael Vick’s Michael Vick: Finally Free (Worthy Publishing): With this memoir, Vick tries to explain how his exposure to dog fighting at age eight plus his poverty-stricken youth led him to make poor later choices, including most famously being arrested in 2007 for running an illegal dog-fighting ring.

You enjoy a challenge

Writing a memoir is a sizable challenge. Some people simply aren’t equipped to write it, at least at this specific point in their life.

But this doesn’t apply to you because you’re reading this book right now. The ones who aren’t equipped to write a memoir never get past the Oh, I’ll write it one day . . . mindset. Or they may not even formulate that thought, which they’ll never act on.

You’re proactive and seeking expert advice and tips. You’re on the right path. Now to go from the impulse to write a memoir to producing 100, 200, or 300 manuscript pages is still challenging, but it’s a different type of challenge. It’s the sort of challenge a tough deadline is at work. You can meet it, but you may have to skip watching TV all week, and you may need to put in a couple of late nights. Make those sacrifices, however, and you’re golden. You can do it.

The same is true of a memoir. Come at it with the right determination, and you’re equipped to overcome any challenges you encounter in the writing process.

You enjoy playing with language

If you enjoy solving word problems and playing word games, you may find great delight in puzzling together the words of a memoir. Just as those games have restrictions that force you to be creative and expand beyond your initial thoughts, writing a memoir insists on the same type of play to uncover/discover the actual solution. In this case, the solution is a quality, readable, enjoyable memoir.

Although you can write anything and still tickle your word puzzle-bone, a memoir may be a better choice because you have all the clues inside you.

remember.eps Any type of writing is like playing a word puzzle game. Going with one answer changes what comes before and after it; it’s all deeply interrelated. Puzzle enthusiasts thrive on the give and take, the guesswork, the rethinking required to succeed. The execution of a memoir has plenty of those things.

You find writing therapeutic

I teach writing to lots of teens and college-age kids, but the most rewarding populations of writers and would-be writers? Rape victims. At-risk youth groups. Prisoners. Trauma victims. Soldiers. Divorcees. Widows. Orphans. Groups who have had a rough shake of things for one reason or another. People whose lives are in a serious state of disrepair.

remember.eps You don’t even have to have some huge reason to feel damaged, sad, or broken — sometimes life itself is reason enough to feel that way. Languishing away with those tumultuous feelings inside you is a mistake. Writing is a wonderful option to take ownership of whatever you feel, explore it, and ideally purge yourself of those feelings so you can more forward into the future without being trapped in the past. Writing a memoir can be a self-generated, private catharsis. It’s transformative. It frees you from shame and guilt. It can quite literally change your world for the better.

remember.eps Even the most well-adjusted, fully-realized, happy and content people can find healing in writing, so don’t think you need rock star–rehab type of problems to write a memoir. Everyday problems can be assuaged via writing, too. The only thing I need to remind you of is this: Be aware of what writing serves the overall purpose of the memoir and what writing is purely for therapy. Just keep the entirely therapeutic stuff in a separate drawer. Don’t include that in your memoir. Always decide what goes in by thinking of your readers. They want to see your pain and share in what you learned, but they’re not likely to choose to sit through years of therapy with you.

You can’t help but write

If you simply love writing, you already know it. You probably have drawers full of love notes and letters and poems and other stuff you’ve scribbled over the years. You may even be writing notes or thoughts in the margins of this book as you go (not recommended, though, if you’re still in a bookstore or reading a library copy!).

Judge to criminal: Write your memoir!

I’m not the only one who seems to realize that writing a memoir is a good, healthy thing to do. When former Bristol-Myers Squibb exec Andrew Bodnar pled guilty to a white-collar crime in 2009 (providing false information to pharmaceutical regulators), Judge Ricardo M. Urbina sentenced him to writing a memoir. Yes, you read that correctly. The punishment for this criminal was a $5,000 fine, two years of probation, and the mandatory writing of his cautionary tale and mistakes in a book of at least 75,000 words.

If you’re a writer, go ahead and write. I can’t think of a better subject material than your own life, so go for it. Unleash the literary hounds!

Granting Yourself Permission to Write a Memoir

For some people, writing a memoir feels inappropriate, like they don’t deserve it. I refuse to do the we’re all as unique as snowflakes thing, but I will say this with certainty — having worked with at-risk youth groups, prisoners, seniors, and stay-at-home-moms (not to mention oodles of college and high school students) — your life does matter. You can easily forget that when you may get signals from the world that says so from time to time. The world is wrong. Your life does matter.

Somehow, far too many people feel they don’t have permission to articulate their own experiences and feelings. In the delicate framework of their own lives, their families, and their friends, they believe it’s off-limits to be so revealing. They have this vague sense of the taboo to writing their memoir.

I give you that permission.

This book gives you that permission.

Your own crucial story gives you that permission.

Through the act of writing a memoir, you can uncover a braver, stronger, more forgiving version of yourself. I’ve witnessed too many success stories to believe anything but this to be true.

The next sections offer ideas on how to make your own success story through memoir by making smart choices about what to share and what to leave out. It also acknowledges that nonfiction writers in general, and memoirists in specific, all have a lot to learn from novelists, who really know how to tell a story. With a little guidance, you can take the facts of your life and turn them into riveting, powerful, truthful prose that stands up well against any work of fiction.

Creating the reading experience of fiction with facts

Aspiring memoirists are often concerned with being stuck with the truth. You’re not stuck with the truth — you’re freed by it. You have the raw data of every single chapter already in your head. All you need to do is figure out the best way to translate that onto the page for your future readers.

Fiction writers spend a lot of time on this very issue because they want to create a seamless, compelling, convincing reading experience. They do this by managing things like time, atmosphere, tone, pace, and characterization. Memoir writers need to be cognizant of those same elements and utilize them to their best effect, too. The chapters in Part II examine many of those narrative elements and techniques, and reveal how you can make every moment that’s important to your life journey feel important to a reader, too.

tip.eps You have permission to use the techniques and tactics of fiction writers to tell your story better. Readers don’t want a laundry list of names and dates and blow-by-blow data from every moment of your life. What they want is a well-written, reflective, emotionally charged literary representation of the most crucial moments of a life.

You absolutely have my permission to aspire to that.

technicalstuff.eps You may have encountered the term creative nonfiction, which is what memoir really is. Memoir is nonfiction (true) that’s told using the creative techniques of storytelling (fiction, screenwriters, and so on). In many ways, memoir is a lot like literary journalism; however, it’s more expansive in that it covers such a wide variety of potential topics: memoir, history, documentary, biography, social criticism, personal essays, belles lettres, cultural criticism, travel writing, nature writing, and science writing.

Using elements of your life versus your entire life

People commonly feel obligated to write their entire life story if they’re going to write about themselves at all. That kind of memoir is actually an autobiography, a book that runs the entire span of a life, from birth until death. You can save that type of personal story for presidents, Bill Gates, and other people who are so famous or important that even the minutiae of their lives makes people listen.

remember.eps You have permission to exclude from your memoir the parts of your life that you don’t want to write about or that don’t fit the theme or themes you’ve chosen to focus on. Plenty of memoirs gloss over childhood, school years, or even careers in order to more quickly get to the juiciest, most relevant stuff.

warning_bomb.eps Don’t exclude events or experiences from your memoir because they’re difficult to write about, or because you’ll be embarrassed about what readers (or Grandma Jackson from Oklahoma, or your beloved Bible school teacher) might think. If you’re potentially embarrassed, that’s a sign you should include them because they’re deeply important, hard-to-put-into-words happenings. Readers will be getting a peek into the most powerful moments of your life — good, awful, silly, foolish, amazing, horrifying, whatever. They’re all good.

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Book Description Paperback. Condition: New. 1. Auflage. Language: English. Brand new Book. The fast and easy way to write your memoir Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides hopeful writers with the tools they need to share their life stories with the world and become published authors. With easy-to-follow, step-by-step instructions along with helpful tips and advice on how to get published Memoir Writing For Dummies shows you how to put pen to paper and hone the craft of writing a truly compelling memoir. You'll get advice on how to explore your memories, map out your story, perfect your plot, setting, character, and dialogue, and so much more. * Includes tips on getting over writer's block * Guides you through every step of the writing and editing processes * Covers the best ways to market a finished memoir Packed with proven tips and writing tricks of the trade, Memoir Writing For Dummies gives you everything you need to ensure your life story is never forgotten. Seller Inventory # AAH9781118414644

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ISBN: 978-1-118-41464-4 March 2013 384 Pages

Packed with proven tips and writing tricks of the trade, Memoir Writing For Dummies gives you everything you need to ensure your life story is never forgotten.

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Part I: The First Steps to Writing a Memoir 7

Chapter 1: The Lowdown on Memoir Writing: Just the Basics 9

Chapter 2: Getting Started: What You Need to Know about Writing Your Memoir 17

Chapter 3: Understanding What Readers Expect: The Story Behind a Good Story 35

Chapter 4: Researching and Remembering: Gathering Enough Material 47

Chapter 5: Developing Ideas like the Pros 61

Part II: Telling Your Story with Pizzazz 75

Chapter 6: Giving Your Story Some Structure77

Chapter 7: Establishing the Setting and Scene 93

Chapter 8: The Character of Characters 111

Chapter 9: Making the Most of Dialogue 129

Chapter 10: Realizing the Power of Voice 153

Chapter 11: Handling Point of View 165

Chapter 12: Bold Beginnings and Fantastic Finishes 179

Part III: Revising, Editing, and Pushing Your Story to the Next Level 193

Chapter 13: Adjusting the Big Picture: Fine-Tuning Structure and Story 195

Chapter 14: Ensuring the Theme and Meaning Are What You Want 207

Chapter 15: Making Revisions 221

Chapter 16: Streamlining Your Story with Sentence-Level Edits 231

Chapter 17: Saying the Unsayable: Knowing What to Include or Exclude 251

Part IV: Sharing Your Story: A Publishing Primer 263

Chapter 18: Locating and Landing a Literary Agent 265

Chapter 19: Making Sense of Traditional Publishing and the Submission Process 281

Chapter 20: Going It Alone: Self-Publishing and E-Publishing 299

Chapter 21: Promoting Your Finished Product (and Yourself) 317

Part V: The Part of Tens 333

Chapter 22: Ten Myths about Memoirs 335

Chapter 23: Ten Reasons Memoirs Are Rejected 341

Chapter 24: Ten Tips to Writing Your First Book 347

Index 353

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Memoir Writing for Dummies

Ryan g. van cleave.

Expert tips and strategies to help you craft your life story and get it published!

Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon � and it's not just for celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides you with the tools you need to share your life story with the world. With easy-to-follow, step-by-step instructions � along with helpful tips and advice on how to get published � Memoir Writing For Dummies shows you how to put pen to paper and hone the craft of writing a truly compelling memoir. You'll get advice on how to explore your memories, map out your story, perfect your plot, and so much more. Packed with proven tips and writing tricks of the trade, Memoir Writing For Dummies gives you everything you need to ensure your life story is never forgotten.

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Memoir Writing For Dummies
Memoir Writing For Dummies Paperback - March 11, 2013 by Ryan G. Van Cleave (Author) 278 ratings See all formats and editions Kindle $12.00 Read with Our Free App Paperback $14.39 36 Used from $7.54 26 New from $13.85 The fast and easy way to write your memoir Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians.
How to Write a Memoir: Examples and a Step-by-Step Guide
A memoir is defined by Lee Gutkind as "true stories, well told." For a piece of writing to be called a memoir, it has to be: Nonfictional Based on the raw material of your life and your memories Written from your personal perspective At this point, memoirs are beginning to sound an awful lot like autobiographies.
Memoir Writing For Dummies Cheat Sheet
Writing is a solitary act, so finding ways to combat the sense of loneliness is a good idea. Here are a few ways to create and develop a community to help support you in writing your memoir. Few people can appreciate the struggles a writer faces like another writer can. Take a writing course at a university, community college, or community center.
Memoir Writing For Dummies|Paperback
Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides hopeful writers with the tools they need to share their life stories with the world and become published authors.
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Find helpful customer reviews and review ratings for Memoir Writing For Dummies at Amazon.com. Read honest and unbiased product reviews from our users. ... If you are writing a memoir, or contemplating writing a memoir, you need to order this book immediately! I have read many books on memoir, and there are some good ones, but this is by far ...
Memoir Writing For Dummies Book
Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides hopeful writers with the tools they need to share their life stories with the world and become published authors.
Memoir Writing For Dummies
Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummiesprovides hopeful writers with the tools they...
Memoir Writing For Dummies Paperback
The fast and easy way to write your memoir. Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides hopeful writers with the tools they need to share their life stories with the world and become published authors.. With easy-to-follow, step-by-step instructions―along with helpful tips and ...
Memoir Writing For Dummies ebook by Ryan G. Van Cleave
The fast and easy way to write your memoir. Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides hopeful writers with the tools they need to share their life stories with the world and become published authors.. With easy-to-follow, step-by-step instructions—along with helpful tips and ...
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Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides hopeful writers with the tools they need to share their life stories with the world and become published authors.
Memoir Writing For Dummies by Ryan Van Cleave
Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides hopeful writers with the tools they need to share their life stories with the world and become published authors.
Memoir Writing For Dummies by Ryan G. Van Cleave
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Memoir Writing For Dummies: Ryan Van Cleave: 9781118414644
The fast and easy way to write your memoir. Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides hopeful writers with the tools they need to share their life stories with the world and become published authors.. With easy-to-follow, step-by-step instructions—along with helpful tips and ...
Memoir Writing For Dummies 1st Edition
Over 5 billion. Memoir Writing For Dummies 1st Edition is written by Ryan Van Cleave and published by For Dummies. The Digital and eTextbook ISBNs for Memoir Writing For Dummies are 9781118414651, 1118414659 and the print ISBNs are 9781118414644, 1118414640. Save up to 80% versus print by going digital with VitalSource.
How to Write Your Memoir in 6 Simple Steps (With Examples)
Learn more about memoirs, including famous memoir examples and key tips for writing your own memoir. Compared to other forms of nonfiction, such as third-person biography or history, memoirs reveal more about their authors and those authors' life experiences. Learn more about memoirs, including famous memoir examples and key tips for writing ...
9781118414644: Memoir Writing For Dummies
Memoir Writing For Dummies Format: Paperback Ryan Van Cleave Published by John Wiley and Sons (2013) ISBN 10: 1118414640 ISBN 13: 9781118414644 New Softcover Quantity: > 20 Seller: INDOO (Avenel, NJ, U.S.A.) Rating Seller Rating: Book Description Condition: New. Brand New. Seller Inventory # 1118414640
Memoir Writing For Dummies
The fast and easy way to write your memoir Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides hopeful writers with the tools they need to share their life stories with the world and become published authors.
Memoir Writing for Dummies by Ryan G. Van Cleave
Memoir Writing for Dummies book. Read 9 reviews from the world's largest community for readers. Learn to: Mine your past for great stories Choose the b...
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Memoir Writing For Dummies
The fast and easy way to write your memoir. Memoir writing is a growing phenomenon, and not just by celebrities and politicians. Everyone has a story to tell, and Memoir Writing For Dummies provides hopeful writers with the tools they need to share their life stories with the world and become published authors.. With easy-to-follow, step-by-step instructions—along with helpful tips and ...

How to Write a Memoir: Examples and a Step-by-Step Guide

What is a Memoir?

Check Out Our Memoir Writing Courses!

Discover Your Writing Niche

Let It Rip: The Art of Writing Fiery Prose

Writing Our Grief: How to Channel Loss into Creative Expression

How to Firm Up the “Mushy Middle” of Any Story

Writing with Consistency and Courage

Memoir vs. Autobiography

1. Structure

4. Philosophy

5. Audience

Memoir Examples

Short Memoir Examples

How to Write a Memoir: A-Step-by-Step Guide

2. Begin drafting

3. Aim for a “ shitty first draft ”

4. Set your draft aside

5. Reread your draft

6. Revise your memoir and repeat steps 4 & 5 until satisfied

7. Edit, edit, edit!

Learn How to Write a Memoir at Writers.com

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