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Being a single mom is the hardest, most empowering thing I’ve ever done

It isn’t easy—but it does teach you how strong you are.

By Sydney Hutt Updated April 27, 2022

single mom

When I told my own mother that my husband and I were splitting up , the first thing she asked me was, “Are you sure?” She’d raised my three siblings and I almost single-handedly and insisted that it was “the hardest thing she’s ever done.”

However, I didn’t take her worries too seriously. At the time, I was so jazzed on the idea of independence, too busy scream-singing The Pussycat Dolls’ “I Don’t Need a Man” in the shower that I regarded my mom’s advice about being a single mom as a bridge for Future Sydney to cross.

Related: To the mama just starting the co-parenting journey: The handoffs were the hardest part for me

Empowered Motherhood class

Well, that future came soon enough. Once I was on my own, I realized that even if I’d already felt like I was doing 90 percent of the parenting and cleaning and general household running many of us moms take upon ourselves, that 10 percent made a huge difference.

1. It’s so much harder than I thought it would be

My husband and I had a routine where he would do the kids’ bath and put them to bed so I could get a break after he got home from work. After he moved out, suddenly that was completely on me, no matter how burned-out I felt .

And not only was I doing all the work during the day, but then once they were asleep there was no one there to help me clean up the hurricane-house, or fold the endless baskets of laundry or to remember to turn the dishwasher on before bed. There was no one to get up with the kids in the middle of the night either, to help soothe their tears, or put them on the toilet , or give out Tylenol for sudden fevers or scrub puke out of the carpet. No one to pick up the prescriptions or forgotten groceries, to catch the things I’d dropped or missed. I’m not going to pretend I wasn’t overwhelmed at first.

2. It’s empowering

Last week, after I killed the second spider I’d found in my house in a matter of days, I sent my mom a triumphant text bragging about my courage. After all, I’d always been able to shriek and have a man rush to crush whatever creepy-crawly had sent me fleeing onto the furniture. In response, my mom texted me back: “Living alone is empowering because it’s not easy.”

And that’s the truth: Being forced to rely entirely on myself for the first time since I was 20 has caused me take on a level of responsibility that’s ultimately made me much, much happier (though also more wrinkly).

3. It’s lonely

One thing I really didn’t expect was the intense isolation that comes with being a single mom. When you’re married, you’re often so used to your partner’s constant presence that you can crave having the house to yourself—an evening alone seems like bliss from a distance.

But quickly I discovered that aaaall that quiet was a huge adjustment. After I put the kids down each night, I was forced to face the long, empty hours before bed that seemed impossible to fill without a companion. The silence was unnerving, and I fantasized about moving into my mom’s house where I could be sure of conversation. But I resisted, and recently, amazingly, I’ve noticed that for the first time ever I’m actually learning how to be alone—and loving it too! But, the odd time I do want to go out…

Related: Motherhood can be lonely, but I want my child to understand the importance of community

4. It’s really tough to get a night away

When I was still married, after my husband got home I’d often take off to the grocery store solo. I’d take my time and stroll down the aisles, pushing my cart like I was a celebrity and they’d closed the store just for me. Sometimes I’d stop by a friends’ house for wine and child-free conversation or go for a drive just to enjoy not reaching backwards groping blindly for a toy as nursery rhymes blare through the speakers. Now that I live alone, I’ve lost that free child-minding a marriage partner offers, and I spend more evenings on the couch yelling at MasterChef Canada than I’d like to admit.

5. The time off isn’t really “off”

Most Friday nights, my ex will swing by and pick up our kids so they can spend the weekend with him. He brings them back on Sundays, meaning I have about one full day without them. Initially, I had ALL the feelings about this arrangement. (What would I do with so much free time?!)

But it turns out, that day off is usually just me catching up on the things I didn’t get a chance to do during the week−a list that is now much longer than it used to be.

Related: What do moms do on their days off? Work

6. You compromise more

There is one fewer parent to go around now and my kids definitely feel it. They act out more than they used to and it seems they’re very aware of the fact that they outnumber me. I’m also unable now to give them each as much of that all-important individual time they enjoyed before my husband and I split. The guilt about this can weigh pretty heavy at times, but I’m learning to recognize that while I’m not giving my girls everything, I really am doing the best I can—and that has to be good enough.

Related: 10 ways to get past conflict with your co-parent

7. You compromise less

Marriage is all about compromise, whether it’s agreeing on paint colors, or household chores or how to spend your money. Since I’ve moved out on my own, I’ve discovered that there is absolute liberation in not having to consider anyone else’s opinion.

My bedroom is the girliest it’s been since I was a teenager, I have books stacked in every corner of my house and if I don’t want to wash the dishes at the end of the night I really don’t have to. My home is entirely mine and it’s a freedom I plan on savoring, along with sleeping smack-dab in the center of the bed and hogging every last pillow.

8. You begin extreme vetting of potential partners

With all this independence and empowerment, I’ve become very unwilling to give up or even share my new life with anyone. I’m being cautious. I’m wary of needing someone too much, of leaning on them instead of myself—it would probably be an easy habit to slide back into. And even now that I am seeing someone, I’ve set serious limits, most of which equal moving about as fast as frozen molasses in terms of how much time and space I’ll devote to our relationship.

I’m not looking for someone to take back that 10 percent and make my life easier—after all, it’s the tough stuff that reminds me what I’m made of.

A version of this story was published July 16, 2017. It has been updated

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The beauty of being a single mom people don't understand

The summer I was 31, I put my belongings in storage and went to Europe. I told everyone I was planning to finally finish my novel, but in reality, I was hoping to meet my future husband. I went on Tinder dates across Europe before I settled in Dublin, Ireland, for a few months. 

By the fall, I was back in the U.S. I didn’t have a husband, or a boyfriend. But I was pregnant, and committed to raising my child as a single mom . The details matter less and less with each passing year, and I try to keep them relatively opaque to preserve my daughter’s privacy. But her dad isn’t in the picture or on her birth certificate. Since the first day I saw the double pale pink line on the pregnancy test, it’s just been the two of us. And I am so grateful for that.

The author with her daughter, Lucy, as a baby.

In my 20s, I worked at a women’s magazine, primarily focused on sex and relationship content. My circle of friends was predominantly women. I saw relationships as a means to an end. By the time I hit 30 and more of my friends were becoming partnered, I felt unmoored and panicky. I was done with my life as a single woman, but unsure what I wanted for the future. I would approach dates like job interviews, trying to cast the person in front of me for the role of husband. Did he have a stable job? Great. A good relationship with his family? Awesome. Did he want kids in the future? Then I would do whatever I could to ensure we would have a second date. I didn’t have time to talk about favorite books or musical tastes or what inspired him. If he sounded good on paper, then he was the right fit for me. To me, having a partner was essential to “ladder up” in the game of life. While I knew this wasn’t a healthy approach to relationships, I also didn’t really see an alternative. I wanted a family. And a husband was the way to get it.

But then, my unexpected pregnancy changed everything — starting with my outlook.

The more things I did by myself — even things that people around me said couldn’t be done, like taking care of a newborn alone — the more I realized I didn’t need a partner. In fact, I realized that in many ways, I didn’t want one.

I went to the hospital in labor on the subway, by myself. I came home three days later, cesarean-section-sore, by myself. For the first seven months of being a parent, my daughter came everywhere with me, simply because there was no one else to watch her. Were there sleepless nights? Of course. Hours of endless Googling the afternoon she rolled off the bed onto the carpeted floor? Without a doubt. But there was also a sense of calm growing inside me. The more things I did by myself — even things that people around me said couldn’t be done, like taking care of a newborn alone — the more I realized I didn’t need a partner. In fact, I realized that in many ways, I didn’t want one.

This became more apparent as I saw how easily resentments could grow in relationships . I saw partnered friends struggle with compromises and have disagreements about child-rearing. Everything from which foods to introduce to their infants to where to send their child to day care was a topic for discussion, and often disagreement. Not needing to compromise made me rely on my own intuition and become incredibly comfortable with my own internal voice and compass. 

"I was experiencing love for the first time with my child," Anna Davies writes of her relationship with her daughter as a single mom.

I was also falling in love, and it looked nothing like what I had imagined. Instead of falling in love with a potential partner, I was experiencing love for the first time with my child. I was entranced by her opinions and her personality, the way she loved animals and sang off-key to the “Frozen” soundtrack and the millions of other things she did that were toddler-typical but also unique to her. She had mannerisms that I recognized from my own childhood pictures — a half smile, bright blue eyes — but was so very much herself. 

She was also completely dependent on me. Everything from the jobs I took to where I lived was decided within the lens of what was best for her. But rather than feel resentful, I felt empowered. I had the ability to put someone else above myself. 

Rather than feel resentful, I felt empowered. I had the ability to put someone else above myself.

In my 20s, I dated one man for six months, which is my longest romantic relationship to date. His biography — lawyer, smart, wanted kids in the future — checked all the right boxes. One night, he called me because he had sprained his wrist during a workout. “I don’t want to be by myself tonight. I think I need someone here,” he said. I remember bristling in annoyance. I had a huge work project due the next day. My plan had been to spend the weekend holed up in my apartment, alone, completing it. In fact, I had liked being by myself, without anyone interrupting me. I didn’t want to be with him, and I didn’t want anyone depending on me. But I felt the right thing to do was to put aside my own needs and go take care of him for the evening, even though I was resentful and angry.

We broke up not long after, but that experience worried me. Maybe, I thought, it was proof I wasn’t meant for relationships. His request had been so normal. Why had it made me so angry? It wasn’t until I was parenting Lucy did I realize what love without expectations felt like. I was learning to parent while learning to love, and it was a deep, intense, healing journey that would have been impossible if I had just fallen into a relationship because someone checked the right boxes.

I don’t want to say that being a solo parent is easy. It’s not. I’ve made a ton of compromises in my career to have the flexibility needed for taking care of a young child. The parent-child relationship when there’s only one parent and one child can be incredibly intense. I never want Lucy to feel responsible for my emotions, and I want her to realize that while this is a life that makes sense for me, it’s not one that makes sense for everyone. I would love her to be able to have that deep, all-consuming love with a partner that eluded me in my twenties. But I know now that it’s also fine if she doesn’t. 

Davies celebrates with her daughter, who is now 8 years old.

Today, Lucy is 8. And I know a child is very different from having a partner. But as so many of my friends’ and acquaintances’ marriages crumbled due to COVID and other factors, I’m so thankful for the stability that I was able to give Lucy by recognizing that my potential as a parent was independent of my potential as a partner.  

In the past two years, I’ve also started going on dates. I’ve lost the need to couple up, which has meant I’m a lot more genuine on dates. I’ve lost the “pick me, pick me” mentality of my 20s and finally have the perspective I needed to determine: Do I like this person? I also have confidence in knowing what is right for me. I know that I will never settle into something that isn’t the right fit, and that’s something I want Lucy to learn, too. I want her to learn she has inner strength and resolve inside her. But most of all, I want her to know that sometimes, living life out of order can be magical, empowering and exactly the right path.

Do you have a personal essay to share with TODAY? Please send your ideas to  [email protected] .

Anna Davies is a writer, editor and content strategist living in Jersey City, New Jersey, with her daughter. She has written for The New York Times, New York, Glamour and others. She loves traveling and sharing the adventures she has with her daughter on Instagram @babybackpacker . 

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Open Access

Peer-reviewed

Research Article

Growing up with a single mother and life satisfaction in adulthood: A test of mediating and moderating factors

Affiliation German Institute for Economic Research, Berlin, Germany

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* E-mail: [email protected]

Affiliation Department of Psychology, University of Warwick, Coventry, United Kingdom

  • David Richter, 
  • Sakari Lemola

PLOS

  • Published: June 15, 2017
  • https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0179639
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Table 1

Single parenthood is increasingly common in Western societies but only little is known about its long-term effects. We therefore studied life satisfaction among 641 individuals (ages 18–66 years) who spent their entire childhood with a single mother, 1539 individuals who spent part of their childhood with both parents but then experienced parental separation, and 21,943 individuals who grew up with both parents. Individuals who grew up with a single mother for their entire childhood and to a lesser degree also individuals who experienced parental separation showed a small but persistent decrease in life satisfaction into old age controlling childhood socio-economic status. This decrease was partly mediated by worse adulthood living conditions related to socio-economic and educational success, physical health, social integration, and romantic relationship outcomes. No moderation by age, gender, and societal system where the childhood was spent (i.e. western oriented FRG or socialist GDR) was found.

Citation: Richter D, Lemola S (2017) Growing up with a single mother and life satisfaction in adulthood: A test of mediating and moderating factors. PLoS ONE 12(6): e0179639. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0179639

Editor: Jacobus P. van Wouwe, TNO, NETHERLANDS

Received: November 15, 2016; Accepted: June 1, 2017; Published: June 15, 2017

Copyright: © 2017 Richter, Lemola. This is an open access article distributed under the terms of the Creative Commons Attribution License , which permits unrestricted use, distribution, and reproduction in any medium, provided the original author and source are credited.

Data Availability: Data are available from the German Socio-economic Panel Study (SOEP) due to third party restrictions (for requests, please contact [email protected] ). The scientific use file of the SOEP with anonymous microdata is made available free of charge to universities and research institutes for research and teaching purposes. The direct use of SOEP data is subject to the strict provisions of German data protection law. Therefore, signing a data distribution contract is a precondition for working with SOEP data. The data distribution contract can be requested with a form. The form is provided here: http://www.diw.de/documents/dokumentenarchiv/17/diw_01.c.88926.de/soep_application_contract.pdf . For further information the SOEPhotline at either [email protected] or +49 30 89789- 292 can be contacted.

Funding: The authors received no specific funding for this work.

Competing interests: The authors have declared that no competing interests exist.

Introduction

Single parenthood is increasingly common in Western societies, with 27.5% of children in the US currently being raised in single-parent households—more than 80% of them in households headed by single mothers [ 1 ]. Although the importance of studying the long-term consequences of single parenthood on children is clear, there is still a dearth of knowledge on the relative strength of long-term effects of single parenthood on children’s well-being at different stages of the adult life-span as well as on the involved mechanisms. Therefore, we study differences in life-satisfaction across adulthood related to differences in childhood family structure in a large representative German panel study. We focus on life-satisfaction in adulthood as a highly desirable characteristic which is assumed to play a crucial role for the populations' health, longevity, and citizenship [ 2 , 3 ].

There are three main pathways by which being raised by a single mother may produce a long-lasting impact on well-being in adulthood. First, children in single-mother households are more likely to suffer from less effective guardianship and a higher likelihood of family distress and conflicts (e.g., [ 4 ]). It is well established that two-parent families generally provide more emotional resources to children than single-parent families (e.g., [ 5 , 6 ]). In a related vein, children, whose parents divorce, exhibit slightly lower psychological well-being and social adjustment than children from stable two-parent families (e.g., [ 5 , 7 , 8 – 10 ]). The experience of parental divorce may cause further emotional distress to the child [ 5 , 11 ] and may eventually lead to an insecure attachment representation [ 5 , 12 ]. Prolonged family distress and insecure attachment representation may in turn complicate the development of social skills and make it more difficult to engage in satisfying intimate relationships which may eventually also hamper life-satisfaction during adulthood [ 12 ].

A second pathway of impact is related to the generally lower socio-economic status and increased risk of economic deprivation among children in single-mother households (e.g., [ 4 ]). Economic deprivation affects children's adjustment and well-being in multiple ways. Children from poor households are at increased risk to live in a low quality home environment and poor neighborhood conditions. They are more often exposed to harsh parental rearing practices and poor parental mental health, and they more often receive suboptimal nutrition and suffer from poor physical health [ 13 ]. Finally, economic deprivation also increases the likelihood of these children to enter careers with poor socio-economic prospects and to show poor social integration when they reach early adulthood [ 5 ].

A third pathway can be summarized as the ‘missing-father hypothesis.’ In popular science, it has been discussed that children need both a mother and a father, presuming that fathering involves distinct and necessary qualities which are particularly important for gender identity formation in boys (e.g., [ 14 , 15 ]). There is also evidence that the absence of a father is associated with an increase in antisocial behaviors in boys, including violence, criminality, and substance abuse [ 16 ] and a decrease in social adjustment in general [ 5 ].

The present study

In the present study, we examine whether general life satisfaction is lower among adults raised by a single mother than for adults raised in two-parent families. To do so, we compare the general life satisfaction of adults reared by their single mothers with respondents who grew up with both parents. As single parenthood and parental divorce are associated with parental socio-economic background and education, we statistically control for parents’ education and occupational prestige along with the respondents’ age and sex.

We expect to find a dose-response relationship, that is, that adults who spent at least part of their childhood in a two-parent family are affected less—despite the significant stresses associated with the experience of parental separation [ 5 ]. We expect a smaller decrease in general life satisfaction in this group, as the parent who left the family may still provide resources to support children when they enter adulthood—which is less likely when the parent has never lived together with the child.

Second, we test mediation models namely whether the association between childhood family structure and general adulthood life satisfaction is mediated by life outcomes that may be summarized as adulthood life success, including educational attainment, employment status, occupational prestige, net income, physical health, integration into social networks, and success in romantic relationships as there is evidence that these life-circumstances are affected in a negative way by growing up in a single parent household and/or by having experienced parental divorce [ 5 ]. We hypothesize that differences in these life circumstances during adulthood partly explain the difference in general adulthood life satisfaction between individuals who have been raised by single mothers and their counterparts who grew up with both parents.

Third, we test moderation of the effects by three possible moderating variables, age, gender, and societal system where the children grew up. Regarding age differences one might assume that the effects of single parenthood wane across the adult life-span following the general psychological principle that the longer ago a negative experience the smaller the imposed impact (e.g., [ 17 ]). Regarding gender differences we test the idea frequently echoed in popular science, namely that men who were raised by single mothers are more disadvantaged in adulthood than their female counterparts. Finally, regarding the question if different societal systems differentially affect the role of childhood family settings for adulthood life satisfaction we compare individuals who grew up in the Federal Republic of Germany and in the German Democratic Republic. The western oriented Federal Republic of Germany (FRG) and the socialist German Democratic Republic (GDR), which existed between 1949 and 1990, differed sharply in terms of several variables that may possibly be relevant for single parent families namely divorce rate, female participation in the labor market, and child day-care infrastructure. The divorce rate in the socialist GDR was nearly twice as high as in the FRG and female participation in the labor market was at 89% compared to 55% in the FRG in 1990 [ 18 ]. Even more drastic difference existed with regard to the child day-care infrastructure; more than half of the children who grew up in the socialist GDR were in regular day-care, which was free of charge, while less than 2% were in day-care in the FRG at the end of the 1980s [ 19 ]. Due to these differences we expect that children who grew up with single mothers in the socialist GDR were less disadvantaged compared to their counterparts who grew up with both parents than children who grew up with single mothers in the FRG; we expect this, as the higher divorce-rate may have reduced the stigma associated with single parenthood in the GDR, moreover, single motherhood was possibly related with relatively less economic burden in the GDR compared to the FRG.

The data are from the SOEP (Version 30), which is an ongoing, nationally representative longitudinal study of private households in Germany running since 1984. Comprehensive information about the data collection, design, respondents, variables, and assessment procedures is reported in Wagner, Frick, and Schupp [ 20 ].

The sample comprised of 26,936 adults born after 1946, of whom 24,123 adults between the ages of 17 and 66 years ( M = 37.86 years, SD = 13.50 years; 52.1% female) were analyzed in the present paper. Given the present study’s focus on the effect of single parenthood vs. growing up with both parents, we categorized the participants into three subgroups: individuals who lived with both parents up to the age of 15 ( n = 21,943), those whose parents separated and who lived with their mothers for between one and fourteen years ( n = 1539), and those who lived with a single mother up to the age of 15 ( n = 641). Data from 2813 respondents were excluded who had spent part of their childhood in different family settings (e.g., raised by the mother and a new partner, by a single father with or without a new partner, or by other relatives; among the excluded respondents there were 207 individuals who grew up with a single father for 1–14 years and 21 individuals who grew up with a single father for 15 years, respectively).

Regarding the societal system where the children grew up, in the FRG, 18,186 respondents grew up with both parents up to the age of fifteen, 1234 lived with their mothers for between one and fourteen years, and 483 lived with a single mother up to the age of fifteen. In the former GDR, 3757 respondents grew up with both parents up to the age of fifteen, 305 lived with their mothers for between one and fourteen years, and 158 lived with a single mother up to the age of fifteen.

Although life satisfaction has been measured since the very beginning of the SOEP study in 1984, the information on where respondents had spent the first fifteen years of their lives was only available for respondents who entered the panel after the year 2000. During the fourteen years of data collection, respondents reported their general life satisfaction (‘All things considered, how satisfied are you with your life in general?’) at the end of each yearly interview using an 11-point scale ranging from 0 ( completely dissatisfied ) to 10 ( completely satisfied ), a measure with high reported reliability and validity [ 21 ]. To minimize error variance and to get a global indicator of adult well-being, general life satisfaction was estimated by aggregating all data available to build a mean-score ( M = 7.33, SD = 1.49). On average, respondents provided 4.71 ( SD = 4.29; range = 1–14) data points of general life satisfaction.

When entering the panel study, respondents reported where they had grown up in the first fifteen years of their life (“How many years of your childhood (up until age fifteen) did you live with the following persons? Please round off to the nearest year”). For our analyses, we used data from the response options “with both your father and mother (biological or adoptive)” and “with your mother without a new husband or partner”.

The participants also reported their socio-economic status (SES) in childhood (i.e., their parents’ education and occupational prestige), their own SES in adulthood (i.e., employment status, occupational prestige, education, and net income), their physical health status during adulthood (the number of visits to the doctor, reverse-coded), their social integration in adulthood (number of friends, number of visits to/from friends, and number of visits to/from family members), and success in romantic relationships (their relationship status and if they were divorced). Descriptive statistics of the study variables for the three subgroups are presented in Table 1 .

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https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0179639.t001

Occupational prestige was scored from 13 to 78 using the Standard International Occupation Prestige Score index (SIOPS; [ 22 ]). Occupational prestige was not available for 5377 (22.3%) of the respondents and for 12,331 (51.1%) mothers and 7097 (29.4%) fathers of respondents. In most cases these individuals had no occupational prestige due to being homemakers or being unemployed. In rare cases, however, participants also did not know their parents’ occupation. Missing occupational prestige was scored with the lowest value possible following the rationale that being unemployed or homemaker is regarded as lower in prestige than all other paid work. Respondents’ general occupational prestige was estimated by calculating the mean of all yearly data available.

Education of parents measured when respondents entered the panel and scored from 1 to 3 (no education [ 1 ]: no school attendance, no degree obtained, other degree obtained, or respondent did not know; low education [ 2 ]: lower-track secondary school; and high education [ 3 ]: intermediate-track or upper-track secondary school). Education of respondents was scored using the International Standard Classification of Education (ISCED-1997; [ 23 ]. Prior to the analyses respondents’ ISCED-Scores were collapsed into three categories (low education [ 1 ]: ISCED-Scores 0, 1, and 2; medium education [ 2 ]: ISCED-Scores 3 and 4; and high education [ 3 ]: ISCED-Scores 5 and 6). Missing information on education ( n = 138, 0.6%) was scored as the lowest category.

Yearly data on the employment status of respondents were coded to generate a continuous index (full-time employment was coded 1.0, regular part-time employment or vocational training were coded 0.5, marginal, irregular part-time employment was coded 0.25, and not employed was coded 0.0) and collapsed into a mean score to represent the general employments status of respondents across the years they reported their life satisfaction.

The number of doctor visits as well as their generalized monthly net income in EUR were estimated by calculating the mean of all yearly data available.

Social network status was measured in the years 2003, 2008, and 2013. Respondents reported how often they “visited or were visited by neighbors, friends, or acquaintances” and how often they “visited or were visited by family members or relatives” on a 1 ( daily ) to 5 ( never ) scale. In the analysis, the scales of these variables were reversed. In addition, respondents answered the question “how many close friends would you say that you have?”. Respondents’ general social network status was estimated by calculating the mean of all data available.

Respondents’ partnership status was coded (with partner was coded 1.0, no partner was coded 0.0) and collapsed into a mean score to represent the respondent’s general relationship status across the years they reported their life satisfaction. Similarly, we coded whether respondents’ marital status was “divorced” (divorced was coded 1.0, all other marital statuses were coded 0.0) for the years they reported their life satisfaction and collapsed the data into a mean score.

Intercorrelations of all study variables are depicted in S1 Table .

In a first step, respondents’ z-standardized general life satisfaction served as the dependent variable in hierarchical multiple regression analyses. In this analysis, dummy-coded variables were used to represent the childhood family settings of the subgroups. These analyses controlled respondents’ age, age 2 , age 3 , and sex as well as parents’ education (dummy coded) and parents’ occupational prestige (standardized). Age was centered before age 2 and age 3 were calculated.

In a second step, analyses of variance were conducted to test whether indicators of adulthood life outcomes including adulthood SES, physical health, social integration, and success in romantic relationships varied significantly in the three aforementioned subgroups. Again, respondents’ age, age 2 , age 3 , and sex as well as parents’ education (dummy coded) and occupational prestige (standardized) were entered into the equations to control for these background variables.

In a third step, mediation analyses were conducted to test whether differences in adulthood life satisfaction related to childhood family structure were mediated by indicators of adulthood life outcomes including adulthood SES, physical health, social integration, and success in romantic relationships in adulthood. These possible mediators of the effect of childhood family settings on general life satisfaction were entered in three blocks. In model 1 (baseline model), parents’ education (dummy coded) and occupational prestige (standardized) were included into the equation to control for childhood SES. In model 2, respondents’ own education (dummy coded), occupational prestige (standardized), employment status (centered), and net income (standardized) were entered as one block representing adulthood SES. In model 3, respondents’ adulthood physical health (number of doctor visits, reverse coded, and centered) was entered to the equation. Finally, in model 4 respondents’ number of friends (centered), visits to/from friends (centered), visits to/from family members (centered), partnership status (centered), and having been divorced (centered) were entered as one block representing adulthood social integration and success in romantic relationships.

First, we compared the variance explained by childhood family settings (only controlling age, age 2 , age 3 , and sex) with the variance that childhood family settings explained after the control variables of model 1 (childhood SES) had been entered to the regression model. Second, we compared the variance explained by childhood family settings in model 1 (only controlling childhood SES) with the variance that childhood family settings explained after the mediators of model 2 (adulthood SES) had been entered to the regression model. Third, we compared the variance explained by the childhood family settings in model 2 with the variance that childhood family settings explained after the mediators of model 3 (model 2 mediators plus physical health) had been entered to the regression model. Finally, we compared the variance explained by the childhood family settings in model 3 with the variance that childhood family settings explained after the mediators of model 4 (model 3 mediators plus adulthood social integration and success in romantic relationships) had been entered to the regression model.

Additionally, we also evaluated indirect paths of childhood family settings on adulthood general life satisfaction via these mediators employing the Structural Equation Modeling module of stata 13. Here, all possible indirect paths were tested in individual models controlling age, age 2 , age 3 , sex, and childhood SES.

In a fourth step, we included interaction terms into the regression analyses to analyze if the effects of the childhood family structure on adulthood life satisfaction varied depending on respondents’ sex and age when completing the questionnaire following the procedure proposed by Aiken and West [ 24 ]. In addition, we tested whether associations of the different childhood family settings with general life satisfaction in adulthood differed for individuals who grew up in the FRG or the GDR.

The analyses were conducted with SPSS 20 and stata 13.

Childhood family settings and adulthood life satisfaction

The main analyses showed a significant association of the different childhood family settings with general life satisfaction. Compared to people raised by both parents, respondents reared by a single mother for between 1 and 14 years or for the entire first 15 years of their lives reported significantly lower general life satisfaction than the group reared by both parents. The effect sizes for the difference in life satisfaction between the two groups reared by a single mother and the group reared by both parents were in the small range (1–14 years: d = 0.10 p < .001, entire first 15 years: d = 0.19, p < .001). Fig 1A depicts the association between childhood family settings and adulthood life satisfaction across the adult life-span controlling for childhood SES. The values underlying Fig 1A are reported in Table 2 , Model 1. The association between childhood family settings and adulthood life satisfaction was not moderated by respondents’ age or respondents’ sex (for further details see below).

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A. Association of general life satisfaction with childhood family settings across the adult life-span controlling for respondents’ sex and childhood SES. 1B. Association of adulthood life outcomes (adulthood SES, physical health, social integration, and romantic relationship success) with childhood family settings controlling for respondents’ sex, age, and childhood SES.

https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0179639.g001

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https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0179639.t002

Childhood family settings and adulthood life circumstances

Fig 1B depicts the various domains of adult life outcomes including adulthood SES, physical health, adulthood social integration, and romantic relationship success separately for individuals who grew up with both parents, who lived with a single mother for between one and 14 years (i.e., individuals whose parents separated at some point in childhood), or who spent their first 15 years living with a single mother, controlling for childhood SES. Growing up with a single mother was associated with lower SES in childhood including lower parental education and occupational prestige (mother’s education p < .01, all other p s < .001). Growing up with a single mother was further related to the participants’ own SES in adulthood including employment status, occupational prestige, and net income. This association exhibited evidence of a dose-response relationship: individuals who spent their first 15 years living with a single mother reported lower SES in adulthood than individuals who spent between 1 and 14 years living with a single mother, who again were lower than their counterparts who lived with both parents throughout childhood, controlling for their childhood SES (all linear trends p < 0.05).

Participants who spent their first 15 years with a single mother further showed a lower degree of social integration during adulthood, including a smaller number of friends and fewer visits to/from family as well as less success in romantic relationships, including a lower probability of living with a partner and a higher probability of having been divorced, controlling for childhood SES (linear trends p < 0.05). Again the effect was somewhat stronger for participants who lived with a single mother for their first 15 years compared to their counterparts whose parents separated at some point during childhood. Generally, the effect sizes were in the modest range, and no significant association between childhood family settings and physical health (number of doctor visits, reverse-coded) and number of visits to/from friends was revealed after controlling childhood SES (see also S2 Table ).

Mediation of the effect on life satisfaction by adulthood life circumstances

Mediation analyses revealed that a large part of the variance in life satisfaction between different childhood family settings was explained by childhood SES, including differences in the education and occupational prestige of the respondents’ parents (i.e., 29% of the variance; see Table 2 , Model 1). Inclusion of respondents’ own education, occupational prestige, employment status, and net income during adulthood into the model attenuated the association of the different childhood family settings with general life satisfaction by a further 20% (Model 2). Inclusion of physical health (Model 3) attenuated the association of the different childhood family settings with life satisfaction by a further 6%. Finally, inclusion of respondents’ social integration and success in romantic relationships attenuated the association of the different childhood family settings with life satisfaction by a further 16% (Model 4). However, the differences in general life satisfaction between respondents who lived with both parents for their first 15 years of life and either group of respondents reared by a single mother remained significant in all models, even when all adulthood life circumstances were controlled for.

Evaluation of the indirect paths between ‘growing up with a single mother for 1–14 years vs. with both parents’ and general life satisfaction revealed that paths mediated by respondents’ education, employment status, physical health, and number of friends were significant (p < 0.05, see Fig 2 ). Regarding indirect paths between ‘growing up with a single mother for the entire childhood vs. with both parents’ and general life satisfaction, paths mediated by respondents’ education, employment status, occupational prestige, net income, number of friends, visits to/from family, partnership status, and experience of divorce in adulthood were significant (p < 0.05, see Fig 2 ).

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Indirect paths were estimated separately in individual models but illustrated here together in one model for presentational parsimony. All models controlled age, age2, age3, sex, and childhood SES. Values are unstandardized path coefficients with 95% confidence limits. Life satisfaction, occupational prestige and net income were standardized; employment status, physical health (number of doctor visits, reverse coded), number of friends, visits to/from family, partnership status, and having been divorced were centered.

https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0179639.g002

Moderation of the effect of life circumstances on life satisfaction by sex

Testing sex differences regarding the role of these adulthood life circumstances for life satisfaction revealed that physical health (i.e., the reverse-coded number of doctor visits; men: β = .09, t = 2.46, p > .05, women: β = .20, t = 5.80, p < .001, sex × physical health interaction: t = 2.66, p < .01) and number of friends (men: β = .05, t = 1.17, p = .241, women: β = .16, t = 4.61, p < .001, sex × number of friends interaction: t = 2.54, p < .01) were more strongly associated with life satisfaction among women who spent between 1 and 14 years of their childhood living with a single mother when compared to their male counterparts. No respective interactions with sex were found for those who spent 15 years living with a single mother.

Moderation of the effect of childhood family settings on life satisfaction by age, sex, and societal system (FGR vs. GDR)

Moderation effects of the association between childhood family settings and adulthood life satisfaction by respondents’ age and respondents’ sex were non-significant when controlling for respondents’ childhood SES (age: F (6, 24104) = 0.807, p = .564, all age × years with single mother interactions: t < 0.45, p > .656; sex: F (2, 24108) = 2.554, p = .078, sex × 1–14 years with single mother interaction: t = 1.74, p = .081, sex × 15 years with single mother interaction: t = 1.51, p = .131), indicating that the effect does not change with age and does not differ between men and women. In addition, the association between childhood family settings and adulthood life satisfaction did not differ significantly between individuals who grew up in the FGR or the GDR ( F (2, 24107) = 0.734, p = .480, Societal System × 1–14 years with single mother interaction: t = 1.14, p = .253, Societal System × 15 years with single mother interaction: t = 0.34, p = .731). This effect remained non-significant ( F (2, 13687) = 0.834, p = .453) when the sample was restricted to individuals born between 1946 and 1974 who lived for their whole childhood until the age of fifteen in the FRG or GDR, respectively.

This is the first study to show that growing up with a single mother is related to a stable although modest reduction in general life satisfaction across the adult life-span until old age when adjusting for poor childhood SES. Individuals who spent their entire first 15 years of life living with a single mother showed on average approximately twice the reduction in life satisfaction compared to individuals who spent only part of their first 15 years with a single mother, which is consistent with a dose-response relationship. This suggests that growing up with a single mother throughout all of childhood and early adolescence and the related lack of resources from the father more than outweighs the well-described negative effects related to parental separation [ 5 , 7 – 9 ].

The reduction in adulthood life satisfaction was partially mediated by the individuals’ living conditions, including their lower socio-economic status and educational level, lower physical health status, and poor social integration and romantic success in adulthood. This finding is consistent with studies on adult well-being after parental divorce [ 5 , 25 ]. The decrease in adulthood life satisfaction was not moderated by age, thus we could not find waning of the effect of single parenthood with increasing distance to childhood. This is in contrast to evidence on negative life events during adulthood including divorce, bereavement, and unemployment for which the general principle of adaptation holds positing that the impact of an negative event decreases with increasing time since the event has happened (e.g., [ 17 , 26 ]). However, and in contrast to studies on effects of negative life events during adulthood we here studied long-term effects of enduring childhood family settings which are possibly more likely to lead to long-term changes to the set-point of general life-satisfaction during adulthood. Moreover, we could not find evidence supporting the widely held notion from popular science that boys are more affected than girls by the absence of their fathers. However, we did find that in females who experienced parental separation during childhood, the effect was more strongly mediated by poor physical health and a smaller number of friends than in their male counterparts.

Finally, we did not find evidence for differential associations between growing up with a single mother in the western oriented FRG compared to the socialist GDR––this although one might expect that the higher divorce rate in the GDR could have reduced the stigma associated with single parenthood in the GDR. Moreover, one might expect that the higher rate of female participation in the work force as well as the higher number of children in day-care in the socialist GDR might have mitigated inequalities between children raised in single parent households compared to children from two-parent households in the GDR.

However, our finding of a non-significant difference between the FRG and the GDR is consistent with comparisons between children raised by single parents in states with well-established welfare systems such as Norway as compared to children from single parents from states with less well-established welfare systems such as the US who neither found any differences [ 27 ]. One explanation for the lack of differences in such comparisons can be summarized by a relative deprivation perspective which holds that existing small economic differences may still matter a lot in societies with a more even distribution of goods and which is in contrast to an absolute economic deprivation perspective [ 26 ]. A second explanation for finding no differences between the FRG and the GDR is that our respondents who grew up in the GDR responded to the study many years after the breakdown of the socialist state of the GDR in 1990. The breakdown of the socialist system has lead to many changes and new economic hardships to a part of the population [ 28 ]. It remains possible that such economic hardships might have stroke adults who grew up with a single mother more strongly than their counterparts who grew up in two-parent families as they possibly also received less support from their father while they were already adults. A third explanation for finding no differences between the FRG and the GDR is that the socio-emotional resources provided by the father were also lacking in single-parent households in the GDR. The deprivation from the father's socio-emotional resources may have outbalanced the effects of some possibly more favorable societal circumstances for single-parents in the GDR.

As a limitation of the study, it remains impossible to derive causality as growing up in a single-mother household and adulthood life satisfaction might both be influenced by a third variable such as genetic factors. In this respect, there is evidence that the risk of divorce is up to 30–40% hereditary which is mediated by personality traits such as negative affectivity [ 29 ]. In a similar vein, it is possible that the direction of the causal influence between the factors that we tested as mediators and life satisfaction are different than we have specified them. For instance it is possible that the relationship between physical health and life satisfaction is reverse involving an impact of life satisfaction on physical health.

A further limitation lies in the measurement of the childhood family settings which were reported retrospectively during adulthood. While it may be assumed that adults are able to reliably report whether they spent the entire childhood vs. only a part of their childhood with a single mother, this variable may still be subject to memory distortions. Furthermore, regarding the possible mediating factors of the effect of childhood family settings on adulthood life satisfaction, physical health could have been measured in a more sophisticated fashion. In the present study it was assessed by the number of visits to the doctor, while more objective measures of physical health such as a doctor’s examinations or physical fitness tests might have revealed different findings.

In conclusion, the present study shows that growing up with a single mother—in particular if the father is absent for the entire childhood—predicts a small but stable decrease in life satisfaction across adulthood that is partly explained by lower socio-economic status and educational achievement, inferior physical health, poor social integration, and lower likelihood of romantic relationship success in adulthood. Contrary to expectations this effect was not moderated by sex, age, or the societal system in which the childhood was spent. Thus, the differences in life satisfaction were similar for younger and older, male and female, as well as participants who spent their childhood in the western oriented FRG or in the socialistic GDR.

Future cross-cultural research comparing effects of family settings on adulthood life-outcomes in several studies from different cultures may identify macro-level protective factors that could be targeted to improve the prospects of single parents and their children.

Supporting information

S1 table. intercorrelations of study variables..

* p < .05. ** p < .01. *** p < .001.

https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0179639.s001

S2 Table. Estimated marginal means of adulthood life circumstances by childhood family settings controlling participants' sex, age, and childhood SES (z-standardized on full sample; M , SE in brackets) .

Values with different superscripts vary significantly ( p < 0.05; Bonferroni-corrected).

https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0179639.s002

S1 File. SPSS-Syntax of the main analyses. Stata-syntax of the mediation analyses.

Those not using SPSS or stata may check the included output-file.

https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0179639.s003

Author Contributions

  • Conceptualization: SL DR.
  • Data curation: DR.
  • Formal analysis: DR.
  • Methodology: SL DR.
  • Validation: SL DR.
  • Visualization: SL DR.
  • Writing – original draft: SL DR.
  • Writing – review & editing: SL DR.
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Single Mothers’ Social Issues Essay (Article)

Introduction, poverty and the well-being of single mothers, mastery and personal control, social capital, social support, and social security, universal social policy, reference list.

The subject of single motherhood has been ignored for a long time. People often struggle to meet their daily needs without caring if everybody else is leading a comfortable life. In a real sense, single mothers struggle to make ends meet. The four central themes discussed in this paper include poverty, mastery and personal control, universal social policies, and the social capital and social support of the single mothers in poverty.

In the ancient days, it was rare to find single mothers. Women would accept to be in polygamous families or in abusive marriages to have the father figure taking care of the family. However, lately, women would rather go and suffer from poverty instead of staying in abusive marriages. Single women spend most of their time hustling and trying to make ends meet.

While employment policies would seem to help the women by offering them over-time payments, the overtime has its negative effects on the social life of the single mothers, as well as their dependants. The mothers who seek overtime payments to earn additional income have insufficient time to care for their children and perform house chores. Their children are forced to learn to do some of the difficult chores at a tender age; a case of child abuse (Albelda, 2011).

Such mothers and their children have hardened up to live in a state of absolute poverty. Such families have accepted their poverty situation, and they suffer in silence because they do not know where to seek refuge. The poverty of single mothers can be explained by such factors as low wages and lack of public support (Hill, 2011, p. 2). Single mothers in poverty treat their problems as personal responsibilities, and they have developed coping strategies. Their children may not obtain full education like children from elite families, and they are not sure of their next meal.

Some of the single mothers, especially those who lack sufficient education to secure lucrative jobs, have to do manual jobs to earn for living. Reports indicate that some single mothers are molested by their employers who know that they do not have a choice, but to submit to them. Some single mothers admitted that they had sexual insults from their employers, and they feared the consequence of reporting the matter.

The little consideration given to single women living in poverty distorts the women and their families. Some of the women struggle to the extent of being hopeless. They turn from highly esteemed individuals to lowly esteemed individuals with no self-control (Ridge & Millar, 2010). The overwork leaves single mothers with no ability to obtain better job opportunities or the freedom to make better choices in life.

Some mothers have given up in life; they have no control over their lives, and therefore, relatives or privileged individuals misuse them for their benefit. The poor women have consistent exposure to stresses, and this reduces their self-esteem and life span (Eshbaugh, 2009). The single mothers living in poverty reach a point where they cannot achieve their set goals because of the difficult economic status.

They may end up suffering from depression, ulcers, high blood pressures, and some of them may be even prone to the fatal outcome. Death marks the beginning of a very difficult lifestyle for the helpless kids, who are left in the unsafe hands of relatives and the harsh world. There is a high probability that the poverty in the family will reoccur in the future if no action is taken.

It would be worthwhile if the government reviewed its antipoverty programs and upgraded the levels of benefits of the low-income earners, and especially the single women living in poverty. Other than enhancing the employment opportunities for single mothers living in poverty, the government needs to accept the fact that the nation is in a crisis (Brandy & Burroway, 2012). Their number of marriages are dilapidated, where women prefer to live singly to have their freedom.

Regardless of the cause of single parenthood, the person suffering greatly is the innocent child whose life determines the future of the nation (Johnson, Honnold, & Threlfall, 2011). The government should work towards protecting the children of single mothers and ensuring that they do not suffer from the consequences of broken marriages. The single mothers who have a heavy burden of caring for their children need help from the government.

It is important that the Aid to Families with Dependent Children (AFDC) program has played a critical role in helping single mothers living in poverty. Moreover, there is a program named Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF), which has played a critical role in strengthening the avenue between work and families of single mothers living in poverty. However, not all single mothers are aware of the above-named programs, and the government needs to invest in advertising the programs to bring general awareness to the required audience.

Single parenthood is not deliberate for all mothers. Some fateful incidences like the death of the husband, unplanned pregnancies, or rape would lead to single parenthood. However, there are those single mothers who deliberately chose to lead a single motherhood lifestyle. Modern Americans are more willing to spend a significant part of their adult life without a formal spouse. This factor contributes to rising divorce rates (Cherlin, 2009, p. 229). The mothers did it for the desire of mastering their lives.

In this case, mastering is the ability for single mothers to take full control of their lives and the lives of their children (Eshbaugh, 2009). Research indicates that most of the women who deliberately chose to live the single motherhood lifestyle had a history of abusive marriages and thus preferred living a life of poverty as long as they have sound minds.

Although teen mothers are said to demonstrate lower mastery levels as compared to matured mothers, to some extent, mastering one’s life is casual relief form stressfulness. The teen mothers can gain experience in mastering their lives as they outgrow from teenage to adulthood.

Mastering is a mechanism that enables most single mothers to cope with all life situations. The single mothers living in poverty are hardened, whereby they develop a way out every difficult situation that arises (Eshbaugh, 2009). Life is interesting, and a series of successes and failures enables people to master their lifestyles. Single women living in poverty pass the mastery ability to their children, and thus, their children can negotiate and alter difficult situations.

If subjected under similar life problems, children living in poverty with their single mother are likely to cope effectively as compared to children from rich families. Such individuals are more likely to accept different forms of family because they are not strongly affected by conventional stereotypes about family (Cherlin, 2009, p. 229). Research indicates that some of the successful individuals in the world came from very humble backgrounds that opened their minds, and this molded them from being great innovators and inventors.

Mastery has played a critical role in single mothers living in poverty. Even though the government gives financial and material assistance to poor mothers, they have also invented new ways of generating income. Single mothers living in poverty are slowly becoming less dependent on government support, and they may soon be self-reliant (Albelda, 2011). They have invented ways of generating income from underexploited self-sufficient projects.

The term poverty will soon snuff out because many single women are participating in self-employment projects. The government should take responsibility and give financial support to the projects of the mothers. Adult education and training programs would play a critical role in encouraging single women living in poverty to take part in the self-sufficiency programs instead of waiting for aid from the government.

Mastery and personal control have enabled single mothers to treat their problems as personal responsibilities. They acknowledge their problems and work tirelessly towards finding tentative or permanent solutions to the problems. Mastery has enabled single mothers living in poverty to accept their position and keep away from criticism of those trying to underestimate them.

Despite the life stresses that poor mothers go through, they have the energy to walk majestically and proclaim their positions in society (Iwata, 2007). It is upon the government to work tirelessly to enhance the sense of belonging to the single women living in poverty.

The society is the greatest determinant of the well-being of single mothers living in poverty. Social support to the single mothers living in poverty offers the mothers with the necessary network to develop social contacts outside their sphere, and meet with potential employees and acquaintances. The information obtained from social networks helps single women considerably.

They obtain new investment ideas, share their life experiences, access useful information, and obtain comfort from their peers. Social support enables poor mothers to feel a sense of belonging, and thus, social trust is strengthened (Johnson, Honnold, & Threlfall, 2011). Strengthened social trust helps in building strong community relationships and deepened mutual obligations. Gender inequalities have not been eliminated, and at present women tend to have lower incomes than men do.

In many cases, women are financially dependent on their spouses (Hill, 2011, p. 5). Social support builds unity, such that all people, regardless of their social class, can access the diversified community resources. Social capital has played a critical role in offering both social support and social power to single mothers living in poverty.

The poor mothers can access soft loans to meet their daily needs. The mothers can even use the loans to invest in small projects that would enhance their financial well-being, and thus be able to manage their needs. The single mothers living in poverty are among the minorities in the society, but the social capital projects recognize them, and the projects help in creating strong bonds between the single mothers and women of their caliber.

As stated before, the society takes the role of offer social security to single mothers living in poverty. It is upon the society to ensure the poor mothers live a comfortable life free from distresses. It is noteworthy that single mothers living in poverty are not vocal because of their tightened schedules in their daily hustles to make ends meet. They may not have access to the necessary information on the current issues. It is upon the society to find ways to get them informed of the happenings.

The information of the procedures to follow in case of a problem should be made available in the places that the poor mothers are likely to visit (Iwata, 2007). Politicians are likely to take advantage of poor mothers. They make heavenly promises to the poor mothers to win their votes, and it is upon the society to protect the single mothers living in poverty from false information.

One should remember about the stereotypes about single mothers; for instance, according to a popular misconception, these women do not seek employment and only expect support from the government (Hill, 2011, p. 4). Due to these stereotypes, they do not receive the assistance that they need.

The society and the local governments should act on behalf of the larger government to embed and protect single mothers living in poverty. The single mothers ought to have a voice to speak, and an ear to listen to them. Most importantly, the government should take an initiative to punish the reckless individuals who father children and leave the burden of caring for the children to the mothers.

It takes a couple to have a child, but the single mothers have often taken the full responsibility of caring for the child. Overall, the main objective of social policies is to improve the welfare of citizens (Petersen, Sznycer, Cosmides, & Tooby, 2012). Universal social policies would work towards protecting the rights of the child. Single mothers living in poverty strain heavily in trying to meet the needs of the children that keep on growing as the children grow older (Brandy & Burroway, 2012).

The biological fathers of the children could be somewhere “enjoying” life, whereas the mother and the child suffer in difficult life situations. While some single mothers could have chosen to be single, there must be an underlying reason, probably abusive marriages. Some Americans have often mistaken single mothers, when, they say that they deserve to live in poverty.

However, some single mothers’ husbands neglect them, some conceived at a tender age, while some single mothers’ husbands died before they could gather enough wealth to cater for the children. It is encouraging to note that single mothers have benefit entitlements from government policies.

The government also has policies to offer total assistance to single mothers living in poverty. The government has taken a great role in ensuring the existence of policies that care for the children. Children living in poverty have statutory entitlements, social insurance, and child maintenance allowances.

The universal social policies have played a critical role in ensuring that single mothers living in poverty have access to their basic needs (Ridge & Millar, 2010). However, some of those mothers have remained to live a life of poverty because of the overdependence of the government.

They never take quality time to think of a worthwhile project that can earn them some extra income to upgrade their lifestyle. It is noteworthy that the “lazy” single mothers living in poverty ought to rise and find a way to generate extra cash other than their entitlements by the government. Also, the scholars state that the development and realization of the social policy largely depend on the norms and values, which are encouraged in the society (Petersen et al., 2012).

From the discussions, it is evident that single mothers are a minority group in society, and they need recognition and protection. The society and the government should invent and invest in long-lasting solutions to alleviate poverty. The solutions would relieve the government from the burden of overdependence on financial support, and this will consequently relieve the taxpayer.

Albelda, R. (2011). Time binds: US antipoverty policies, poverty, and the well-being of single mothers. Feminist Economics, 17 (4), 189-214.

Brandy, D., & Burroway, R. (2012). Targeting, universalism, and single-mother poverty: A multilevel analysis across 18 affluent democracies. Demography, 49 (1), 719-746.

Cherlin, A. (2009). The Origins of the Ambivalent Acceptance of Divorce. Journal Of Marriage & Family , 71 (2), 226-229.

Eshbaugh, E. (2009). Socioeconomic predictors of mastery among mothers in poverty. Journal of Poverty , 13 (1), 426-440.

Hill, K. (2011). Single Mothers – How are They Doing?. Journal Of Organizational Culture, Communications & Conflict , 15 (1), 1-10.

Iwata, M. (2007). Identifying the poor: Analysis of impoverished single-mother households. Journal of Poverty , 11 (3), 29-45.

Johnson, J.A., Honnold, J.A., Threlfall, P. (2011). Impact of social capital on employment and marriage among low-income single mothers. Journal of Sociology & Social Welfare , 38 (4), 9-31.

Petersen, M., Sznycer, D., Cosmides, L., & Tooby, J. (2012). Who Deserves Help? Evolutionary Psychology, Social Emotions, and Public Opinion about Welfare. Political Psychology , 33 (3), 395-418.

Ridge, T., & Millar, J. (2010). Following families: Working lone-mother families and their children. Social Policy & Administration, 45 (1), 85-97.

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Bibliography

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Essay on “The Roles of a Single Mother”

Mothers are arguably some of the best multi-taskers in the world today. The sheer amount of responsibilities they need to juggle makes them a combination of nurturer, caregiver, teacher, nurse, cheerleader, disciplinarian and more. I would know—I’m a mother, myself. If there is something even more challenging than being a mother, though, it is being a single mother with no parents to help you out. My situation is a little different from other single mothers, however. Aside from the aforementioned roles, I also took on the additional roles of full-time student and part-time worker. Thankfully, I’ve learned enough from the University of Hard Knocks with respect to balancing school and family life. Most of my time is devoted to caring for my children. My studies take second place, with work coming in third and the remaining fraction of my time left for the rest.

Unfortunately, juggling all of the things I’ve mentioned above does not necessarily translate into calmness and ease all the time. In fact, it often leads to role strain. There are times when I actually wish I had help in the form of a helpmate—someone who could look after the kids while I sought that much-needed break. My children are precious to me, yet there are admittedly days when they seem semi-precious. This most often happens when their needs prevent me from keeping up with my homework. Sometimes, my assignments have to take a backseat to more pressing needs like feeding them, cleaning them or helping them with their own assignments. My social life is almost non-existent as a result of this (Szakaly, “Role Strain in Caregiving”).

The good news is that my part-time job doesn’t really feel like work. In fact, it feels more like an interesting diversion —a chance to go out and meet new people and help someone out. The benefits work both ways: the people I reach out get their needs met and I get the chance to forget my own problems for a while (Howe, “Meeting the Challenge of Being a Single Mom”). It is also a great opportunity for me to connect with someone other than my kids and it helps me grow in a fun way.

Then there are the rough days when the frustration sets in . During these dark times, I continuously remind myself of my reason for doing this precarious balancing act: to provide a better life for my kids. When they are sleeping, I take the time to ground myself, to pray and to ask God for the strength to do what is right (Szakaly, “Role Strain in Caregiving”). At first glance, it would seem as if I am the sum of these statuses and nothing more. Most people look at me and see a struggling mother, a part-time worker and a student, and rightly so, for these things are part of my current life. However, I am working hard to be more than just them. I know that God put me on Earth for a reason. Part of my life’s meaning comes from discovering that reason and living it out to the best of my ability. One day, I will not only live out my potential—I will transcend it as well.

In closing, I see my status as a single mother as a supreme challenge . It tests my conviction and my courage on a daily basis to the point where I question and doubt myself. Nevertheless, all it takes is a prayer and one look at my sleeping children to get me back on track. As God has showed me time and time again, it is in dying to myself daily and in trusting Him completely that I discover the person that I really am and the life that I am truly meant to live .

Works Cited

Howe, Michele. “Meeting the Challenge of Being a Single Mom.” Powertochange.com. Power to Change Ministries, n.d. Web. 26 April 2012. Szakaly, Jennifer. “Role Strain in Caregiving.” Jenniferszakaly.hubpages.com. Hubpages, n.d. Web. 26 April 2012.

Is It Just That Actors and Professional Athletes Are Paid So Much?

Throughout the history, there always existed and exists a kind of people who would rather count somebody else’s money than earn a little bit of their own. The difference between the past and the present is that previously this idea was called “envy” and was treated correspondingly; nowadays it is called something like “just redistribution…

Argumentative Essay on Children Copying Behavior of Adults

Children have always been copying their parents’ behavior. It is very easy to notice. Three-year-old girl criticizes her doll for the same faults she was punished earlier. She copies not only her mother’s words, but even mimics and gestures. Parents’ behavior is taken for the model: “I want to do exactly what my mother does”….

Fashion Makes You a Victim, Fashion Makes You a Star

Every single year when a new fashion season starts, fashion capitals of the world turn into Meccas for the followers of the latest trends. The greatest fashion houses present their collections, top designers set the trends, photographers and models work hard in an attempt to make people fill their wardrobes with the stuff they don’t…

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Opinion: Single mothers like me are easy scapegoats. But the case for marriage is a myth

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I am happier as a single mother than I ever was as a married one. Despite the fact that 47% of Americans think single mothers are bad for society, becoming one made my life and my children’s lives much better. This was made clear to me during the COVID-19 shutdown, when my kids were in third grade and kindergarten and Zoom school would often drive all three of us to tears. I was making near poverty-level wages, still trying to dig myself out of the debt of divorce and the cost of living.

At one point a friend texted me to ask how things were going. “I can’t imagine doing this pandemic as a single mother,” she said.

I took a breath and looked around my house. The light was pouring in through the windows, my cat was asleep on my lap. I was working hard and exhausted and afraid. But I was also so happy because for the first time in my life, I had the space to do the work I loved.

Burbank, CA - January 10: Husband and wife Xavier Coelho-Kostolny and Beccy Quinn pose for a portrait on Wednesday, Jan. 10, 2024 in Burbank, CA. (Jason Armond / Los Angeles Times)

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Court-mandated 50/50 custody meant my ex was doing his share of the online schooling and child rearing. My friend’s husband had been ignoring their kids to focus on his sourdough starter project. By the next year, she too was a single mother.

Single mothers have been blamed for everything including crime rates , school shootings and poverty . Alone and without a man, they are the specter of our cultural anxiety. People wring their hands and wonder who their sons will look up to without husbands around. As if sons can’t love and admire their mothers and see them as models for humanity.

Single mothers are more likely than married women to be poor and to face the pressures of the wage gap, and the lack of affordable child care and healthcare in the U.S. But single mothers themselves are not the cause of these deficiencies; we are merely a byproduct.

Although I chose to be a single mother, our society often doesn’t acknowledge that many single parents were forced into that situation due to issues such as abusive partners, incarceration and lack of reproductive rights. Single mothers are easy scapegoats for problems they didn’t create. We are shoved into poverty through systemic problems and then blamed for it.

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA--AUG. 29, 2019--At Roybal Learning Center in Los Angeles, Robert Montgomery teaches a "transition to college math and statistics" class to 12th graders.The course, developed in partnership with the CSU, includes review of essential math skills. (Carolyn Cole/Los Angeles Times)

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In “ The Blueprint to Save America ,” the Republican Study Committee ’s fiscal report from June 2022, the group repeatedly emphasizes that marriage and family should be the focus of government spending instead of the social safety net. The report argues that it’s being a single parent ( specifically a single mother , as they never mention single fathers) that tends to lead to poverty. The solution? Force people into marriage in the name of fiscal responsibility. This follows a pattern: The Moynihan Report from 1965 and George W. Bush’s Healthy Marriage Initiative also pushed for women and mothers to enter into marriages, rather than advocating for funding a social safety net.

But often walking out of single motherhood into marriage is like walking from one cage into a slightly bigger one. Reports smearing single mothers are ubiquitous, but we rarely consider that marriage itself can be a form of entrapment. For example, husbands add seven hours of domestic labor per week for their wives, while a wife reduces her husband’s labor by an hour a week. Additionally, almost 20% of American marriages involve some form of physical violence, with emotional abuse even more prevalent. Women do more child-rearing and more adjusting of their careers to accommodate family and domestic partnership. And there is a lot of evidence that supports the idea that divorced women are happier. Not to mention that single mothers have more leisure time and get more sleep than their married counterparts.

illustration of a woman on a picnic blanket being swarmed by storks carrying babies

I chose to be child free. (The correct response is ‘Congratulations!’)

The pressure to procreate comes from so many directions I’m considering pitching a “Walking Dead” spinoff where the child free are the living and everyone else are zombies trying to turn us.

Aug. 19, 2023

I am not surprised that single mothers are seen as a negative for society. Free women are destabilizing. Their existence, their radical happiness upsets our cultural ideas of what love and family ought to look like. I am glad it does.

As a single mother, I’ve been forced to build a new kind of life for myself. I own my own house and I’ve filled it with pets, books and friends. I do less housework than I did when I was married. I realize part of this is the privilege of being able to find work that pays my mortgage and puts food on the table. But part of it is the equality I gained through 50/50 custody, which gave me time to work — something I never had when I was carrying the bulk of the emotional and physical labor during my marriage.

Experiences of single motherhood are vast and diverse. When I was broke and struggling in the early days of single motherhood, I would remind myself that I’d been poor before. But what I had never been was free. And in 2024, that feels radical.

Lyz Lenz is a mother, journalist and author. Her new book, “ This American Ex-Wife ,” will be published Tuesday.

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Single Mothers US

5 Ways To Write Scholarship Essay As A Single Mother

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Last Updated on January 22, 2024 by Lori Pace

When it comes to crafting a compelling scholarship essay, every word and idea matters. Single mothers, in particular, face unique challenges that can make this task even more daunting. However, with determination and the right guidance, you can overcome these obstacles and shine through your essay. One crucial aspect of a winning scholarship essay is a clear and persuasive thesis statement that encapsulates your goals and aspirations. This is where thesis writing help can play a pivotal role. Seeking assistance from experienced professionals or mentors can assist you in articulating your thoughts and objectives effectively, increasing your chances of securing the financial support you need for a brighter future. So, don’t hesitate to reach out for thesis writing help as you embark on this journey toward educational success.

If you’re a single parent with dependent children, going to college doesn’t have to be just a pipe dream. But before that, you have to pass the “test” to achieve a scholarship if you want to reduce the financial pressure. So, in this article, we’ll talk about the top 5 ways to write a scholarship essay for single moms and other things to keep in mind.

Single Mothers’ Facts

There is around 43 percent of college students in the United States are single mothers, according to the Institute for Women’s Policy Research. Almost 88% of single mothers have incomes that fall below the poverty line.

scholarship essay for single moms

Single mothers who go to college and acquire a degree are often saddled with more debt than their peers who do not. Single parents, on the other hand, had an average of $3,800 more debt than students without children. This is nearly $5,000 more debt than students without children of the same gender.

It’s an undeniable fact that acquiring a college degree increases your salary significantly. Those with a bachelor’s degree earn 66% more than those with a high school diploma throughout the course of their career. Below are the top 5 ways to write scholarship essay for single moms.

5 ways to write scholarship essay for single moms

Follow directions.

Reading scholarship application essays, according to Shore, is the most frustrating part of the process. What this implies is paying attention to any formatting or length limits, as well as responding to the question.

A good rule of thumb to follow when writing an essay is to focus on responding directly to the question that was posed. “Longer doesn’t always equate to higher quality. The essay will be boring to both the writer and the reader if the former is the case.”

Get Personal and Be Specific

Experts suggest that the most important part of a successful scholarship essay is to make it personal and include powerful details. In a sea of academic essays that may be tedious to readers who are sifting through hundreds or even thousands of submissions, an essay that seems authentic and offers insights into the applicant’s deeper character will stand out. To be considered for a scholarship from any reputable organization, the scholarship essay writer recommends students submit a scholarship application. This includes multiple essays outlining their academic goals, aspirations for future employment, and other relevant information. The social justice-focused nonprofit foundation provides more than 60 scholarships to deserving post-secondary students in the Northwest.

Tell a Story in Your Scholarship Essay

Monica Matthews, author of the scholarship guide, “ How to Win College Scholarships ,” believes that an outstanding essay catches the reader’s attention from the first sentence.

In order to get their audience interested, students should use a hook that is both personal and concrete “Mathews sent that.”. Judges can’t assess a person’s true character just by hearing them mention how they’ve benefited others. Essays with lasting impact are those that use interesting details to describe personal experiences that are based on real-life events. Experts advise students to consider the essay’s structure and how it might entice a reader. The story should reflect the student’s life.

Customize Your Scholarship Essay

essay about single mother

The use of a previously written essay for a different application may be permissible and even smart in some situations. Students, on the other hand, should exercise caution, according to experts. Colleen Paparella Ganjian, an independent educational consultant and founder of DC College Counseling in Virginia, noted in an email that “many students try to re-purpose writings from the admissions process for scholarship essays, and the result ends up being so-so.” When writing an essay, students should focus on answering the exact question they are being asked and the organization they are applying to.

Don’t Make Yourself Customized to the Reader

Many students feel the need to exhibit a certain version of themselves in scholarship applications and essays. Not always necessary. Shore says scholarship applicants must be themselves. Mandee Heller Adler, founder, and CEO of Florida-based Overseas College Counselors says personalizing oneself may appeal to nontraditional or international students .

“Share your traditions, culture, and experiences. If you’re a foreign candidate, minority, or non-traditional student, don’t “Americanize” your application “Heller Adler emailed it. “The goal is to stand out among scholarship hopefuls. Don’t be afraid to delve into your heritage to better understand your identity.”

It’s not easy for anyone to pay for their child’s college education, but it’s especially challenging for single moms. Whether you’re returning to school or starting your academic career from scratch, there are numerous resources to help you succeed. Even though scholarships for single moms are available, we at College Rank can help you streamline your college search. There are a number of factors to consider while choosing a college to attend. These can include the type and cost of education you desire.

Lori Pace

Lori Pace is a single mother of three daughters ages 7 and under. As a working mom from home, she balances kids, work and two crazy dogs with humor and love. Follow Lori as she honestly gives tips and advice based on her own experiences as a single mom!

essay about single mother

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  • Single Parent Essays

Single Parent Essays (Examples)

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Parenting the single parent is.

What are these advantages? Simply put, everything that the single-parent household does not have. Again, this is not to indicate that automatically a single parent home is worse than a two-parent home. But when the parents are involved in their children's lives, are non-abusive, and are relatively happy with each other, then virtually all of the negative effects of growing up in and being part of a single-parent home go away. Often the single parent turns to family members (and in particular their parents) to assist with child-care. "Any parent who can prove that they have brought up their children to adulthood and that said children a) have completed their education, learning something in the process, b) have not died in an accident or through neglect, c) are basically healthy, d) have no criminal record, e) have obtained and maintained employment for a period of one year, should be recompensed….

Anderson, Digby. "Dead Issues." National Review. Jan 29, 1996 v48 n1 p49(2)

Bradbury, Bettina. "Single parenthood in the Past." Historical Methods. Fall, 2000. v33. i4. p211.

Carlin, David. "The single-parent trap: how our culture's mindless pursuit of freedom has made us ignore the obvious." Christianity Today, May 16, 1994 v38 n6 p35(2)

Dornbusch, Sanford; Herman, Melissa & Lin, I-Chun. "Single Parenthood." Society. July-August 1996 v33 n5 p30(3)

Parenting Being a Single Parent

In addition to the psychological stressors, single parenting can also cause social pressures. The single parent lacks enough time or energy to meet potential new partners or to develop existing friendships. Similarly, the child may suffer socially by falling in with the wrong crowd at school to make up for the lack of attention experienced at home. Both parent and child might find themselves feeling socially isolated because of the unique pressures of single parenting. Financially, single parenting can be a burden. The costs of childrearing are often too difficult for two parents, let alone for one. When the single parent is forced to work long hours to be able to afford basic living expenses, both child and parent suffer. Therefore, single parenting can leave a family in debt and cause the child to be unable to attend the college or university of his or her choice. Single parenting can cause a….

Single Parent Families

parent families caused by adoption by a single parent and divorce. A two parent family will always be considered the perfect family as it allows for a male and female role model. However, life is not always perfect and a changing society is creating new family dynamics within the community. From a two parent family structure the scene is changing to a single parent family created through divorce, lack of marriage and in some circumstances choice. Yet, psychologists remain firm on the fact that it is the two parent family that is the most successful. Still, since the family structure is changing and we have to deal with single parent families we must aim to understand the different dynamics of the single parent families. Analysis: Common Factors in Single Parenting Most of the research done on single parent families is focused on the mother as the primary caretaker. However, trends are….

1. Demo, DH, & Cox, M.J. (2000). Families with children: A review of research in the 1990s. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 62, 876-895.

2. Hamner, Tommie, and Turner, Pauline H. (1985). Parenting in Contemporary Society. Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey: Prentice-Hall.

3. Lansford, J.E., Ceballo, R., Abbey, A., & Stewart, A.J. (2001). Does family structure matter? A comparison of adoptive, two-parent biological, single-mother, stepfather, and stepmother households. Journal of Marriage and Family, 63, 840-851.

Single Parent Problems

Overview Single-parent families, by definition, are families having a single parent as the head of the family either by choice, as a consequence of death of the other partner, or divorce. It is important to note that over the last two decades, single parent families have been on the increase – effectively resulting in family structure changes. As a matter of fact, as Strong, DeVault, and Cohen (2010) point out, “in the United States, as throughout the world, single parent families have increased and continue to grow in number” (p. 468). Various research studies conducted in the past have clearly demonstrated that single parent families face more challenges than two-parent families. This text will identify some of the more prominent challenges that have been identified. Further single parenting resources and some of the solutions to the identified challenges will be highlighted. Discussion Stereotypes and Discrimination It is important to note, from the onset, that….

Single Parent Love Life and Influence on Their Children

Dating and Sexual Behavior Among Single Parents of Young Children and Effect on Their Children Among the different difficulties encountered by single parents with young kids, a prominent one is dealing with possible trade-offs between personal romance and parenting. Usually, single parents have a primary responsibility to caring for and raising young children; however, this may be accompanied by a longing for a sexual/romantic partner, as well. Trade-off-related difficulties are especially prominent when children are too young and dependent (e.g. toddlers and babies) (Konner, 2010). Apart from time requirements linked with acquiring a partner, a parent will also be concerned with regard to any interference to their young child's emotional and social growth. This paper aims at determining the effect of sexual behavior/dating by single parents on young children, by reviewing relevant literature. Single parent dating and sexual behavior A single-parent family with young and dependent children constitutes a social niche that is….

Goldscheider, F., Kaufman, G., & Sassler, S. (2009). Navigating the "new" marriage market: How attitudes toward partner characteristics shape union formation. Journal of Family Issues, 30, 719-737.

Gray, P. B., & Garcia, J. R. (2013).Evolution and human sexual behavior. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press.

Gray, P. B., Garcia, J. R., Crosier, B. S., & Fisher, H. E. (2015). Dating and Sexual Behavior Among Single Parents of Young Children in the United States. Journal Of Sex Research, 52(2), 121-128. doi:10.1080/00224499.2014.941454

Konner, M. (2010).The evolution of childhood. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press.

Opportunities to Assist Single-Parent Families Although Every

Opportunities to Assist Single-Parent Families Although every single-parent family is unique, they all share the same challenges that are associated with life in the 21st century, as well as many that are more acutely manifested by virtue of their single-parent status. The traditional two-parent family has been increasingly replaced with single-parent families in recent years, and in some inner-city communities, they are the norm rather than the exception. Single-parent families exist everywhere though, of course, and while the reasons for this condition include death and divorce, they also include abandonment and temporary but lengthy absences of one of the parents. Despite a growing body of research concerning the effects of single-parent status on family members, there remains a relatively paucity of research from the perspective of the family members, as well as how American society views this issue. To gain some new insights in this area, this paper provides a….

Usdansky, M.L. (2009, May). A weak embrace: Popular and scholarly depictions of single-parent families, 1900-1998. Journal of Marriage and Family, 71(2), 19-21.

Ziol-Guest, K.M. & DeLeiere, T. (2006, Winter). The allocation of food expenditure in married -- and single-parent families. The Journal of Consumer Affairs, 40(2), 111-119.

Walker, L.J. & Hennig, K.H. (1997, January). Parent/child relationships in single-parent families. Canadian Journal of Behavioural Science, 29(1), 37-39.

Children From Single Parent Homes

This method presents only evidence of whether there is a difference in the mean of two groups, so in this case showed there to be a difference in the mean level of substance abuse in children from one and two parent families. This type of analysis is a simpler method than regression, and may be ample to answer the research question of whether there is increased risk for those in single parent families. It would also appear to be able to offer some insight as to whether there was a gender-based difference in substance abuse. This would however require confirmation using a one-tailed t-test between the mean for boys and girls from single parent families. The main drawback from this study's approach to the statistical analysis is that it does not allow for removal of confounding variables. This means that as there may be an association between single parent….

Biblarz, T.J. & Gottainer, G. (2004). Family structure and children's success: A comparison of widowed and divorced single-mother families. Journal of Marriage and Family, 62(2): 533-548.

Kuntsche, E.N. & Silbereisen, R.K. (2004). Parental closeness and adolescent substance use in single and two-parent families in Switzerland. Swiss Journal of Psychology, 63(2): 85-92.

O'Hare, B. (No date). The Rise - and fall? - of Single Parent Families. Retrieved on September 14, 2008, at  http://www.prb.org/Articles/2001/TheRiseandFallofSingleParentFamilies.aspx .

Spencer, N. (2005). Does material disadvantage explain the increased risk of adverse health, educational, and behavioral outcomes among children in lone parent households in Britain? A cross sectional study. BMJ, 59: 152-157.

Effects of Single Parenting on the Academic Achievement of Children

Parenting on the Academic Achievement of Children Single parenting effects The term family refers to a group of at least two people who are related by birth, marriage, or adoption and who share resources, responsibility for decisions, values and goals, and have a commitment to one another over time (Nelson, 1992). Families provide for emotional, physical, and economic mutual aid to their members. However, the family-system in the United States has undergone some radical changes. From the late 1960's to the 1990's the proportion of U.S. children being raised in two-parent homes dropped significantly, from approximately 85% in 1968 to 69%, whereas the proportion of children living in single-parent homes nearly doubled (United States Department of Justice, 2011). Since the 1970's nearly a third of family households with children are maintained by a single parent and nine out of ten times that parent is a woman. Single-parent families with only one….

Astone, N.M., & McLanahan, S.S. (1991). Family structure, parental practices, and high school completion. American Sociological Review, 56(3), 309-320.

Balcom, D. (1998). Absent fathers: Effects on abandoned sons. Journal of Men's Studies, 6(3),

Bornstein, M. (Ed.) (1995). Handbook of parenting, Vol 3, Status and social condition of parenting. NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum.

Role Therapist Working Single Parent Families

Therapist to Single-Parents Therapists serve many roles in their careers. However, when working with single-parent families, that role gets multiplied. When working with single parents, therapists need to be aware of all of the resources available to the parent and to the children (Kazdin, Whitley, & Marciano, 2006). The therapist needs to be a source of information. They need to be prepared with financial assistance information, with psychological skills for talking to both the parent and the children, and they also need to be aware of the community that the single parent is living in (Weltner, 2004). A therapist wears enough hats as it is, but when working with single-parent families this role becomes all that more important as they become the parent's complete support system. Single-parent families are not as financially stable as those families that have two parents contributing to everything (Weltner, 2004). Having two incomes may sometimes not feel….

References:

Weltner, J.S. (2004). A structural approach to the single-parent family. Family Process, 21(2), 203-210. doi: 10.1111/j.1545-5300.1982.00203.x

Kazdin, A.E., Whitley, M., & Marciano, P.L. (2006). Child-therapist and parent-therapist alliance and therapeutic change in the treatment of children referred for oppositional, aggressive, and antisocial behavior. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 47(5), 436-445. doi: 10.1111/j.1469-7610.2005.01475.x

Target Population Is Single Parents and Low-Income

Target population is single parents and low-income parents in Sacramento County and Northern California. The goals are to emphasize the benefits that could be derived from raising children in two -parents households compared to a single parent home. The Sacramento is the 6th largest city in California and 35th largest city in the United States with the estimated population of 477,892 in 2011. (The Healthy Marriage Project. 2011). Before 2005, the number of single parents and divorce trends in the Sacramento exceed the national average. Major factors leading to the issues include poverty, and drug abuse. Other risk factors include out-of-wedlock births, which are increasingly high among African-American (65%) and Hispanic (54%). The elationship Skill Centers aims to deliver quality of life to undeserved population in the community. The elationship Skill Centers serves the Sacramento city, which is the capital city of the state of California. The elationship Skills Center….

Amato, P.R. & Beattle, B. (2010). Does the unemployment rate affect the divorce rate? An analysis of state data 1960 -- 2005. Social Science Research, 40,(3):705 -- 715.

The Healthy Marriage Project. (2011).Final Evaluation Report for the Healthy Marriage Project: Summary of Process and Outcomes. Sacramento, CA.

Center for Control and Disease Prevention (2012), Marriage and Divorce. National Center for Health Statistics. USA.

Hansen, L. (2013, March 28). 9 Negative effects divorce reportedly has on children. The Week. Retrieved from:  http://theweek.com/article/index/242059/9-negative-effects-divorce-reportedly-has-on-children

Special Strengths and Challenges of the Single-Parent

Special Strengths and Challenges of the Single-Parent Family Special Challenges and Strengths of the Family Headed by a Single Parent The objective of this work in writing is to answer questions including what special challenges does the family headed by a single parent face and what special strengths or assets do they have. This work will answer as to whether these are typical challenges and strengths witnessed in this type of family and will provide advice for a family headed by a single parent. Now, more than ever in history there are many families headed by a single parent. These single-parent families face many challenges but they also have special strengths that help them to overcome these challenges and ultimately that bond these families in a unique way. Single-Parent Families Challenges One of the primary challenges faced by the family headed by a single parent is one relating to finances. The single-parent family generally does….

Bibliography

Bailey, S.J. (2001) Building Strong Single-Parent Families. Montana State University Extension Service. Retrieved from:  http://msuextension.org/publications/HomeHealthandFamily/MT200110HR.pdf 

DeFrain, J. (2005) The Strengths and Challenges of Single-Parent Families After Divorce. A paper to be presented at the Mexican International Family Strengths Conference, June 1st 2- 3rd, 2005, in Cuernevaca, Mexico. Retrieved from:  http://www.ciesas.edu.mx/proyectos/mifs2005/papers/keynotes/john_de_frain.pdf

Challenges of a Single Parent Living on Campus

The single parent living on campus is in a unique position unlike any other student in college today. The single parent, typically a young female, is determined and motivated to succeed in college. Even if her grades are not the best (how could they be with her time divided between caring for herself, studying, going to class, and caring for her baby?), but she plans to stick with it because she sees obtaining her degree as her only way out for herself and for her baby. Getting her credentials will allow her to get a respectable job with a respectable salary. Then she will be able to think about things like daycare and housing. At the moment, however, she relies on the assistance of friends from class, individual students who are willing to lend a helping hand and give her the assistance she requires so that she can get to….

Parenting Program for Women and

There are many of these individuals, and it is time that this is changed. Parents often look away from these kinds of problems, or they spend their time in denial of the issue because they feel that their child will not be harmed by parental involvement with drugs or alcohol. Some parents have parents that were/are addicts themselves, and some are so busy with their lives that they do not actually realize that their child has any kind of problem with the lifestyle of the parent until it becomes so severe that it cannot be overlooked, or until it is brought to their attention by police, the school, or someone else that has seen it first hand. Parents are not the only ones that overlook this issue, though. Sometimes siblings and friends also see problems that they ignore, do not understand, or do not talk to anyone about, and the school….

Aleman-Padilla, L. 2002. Babies First gets last word on infant care Hundreds recognize groups contribution at fourth annual event. The Fresno Bee.

Anderson, D. 2004. Funding cuts impact health services. Precinct Reporter.

Anderson, S.A. (2000). How parental involvement makes a difference in reading achievement. Reading Improvement.

Baker, P.L. (2000). I didn't know: discoveries and identity transformation of women addicts in treatment. Journal of Drug Issues, 30, 863-881.

Parent With a Young Child and a

parent with a young child and a demanding job -- whether it is a mother or a father -- has challenges that a family with both parents on board does not experience, in most cases. And when you add to the equation the fact that the single parent in this case is a male in the U.S. Army, there are complications and serious work-life balance issues to be addressed. After all, the health and care of the child in question must be at the top of the list of priorities, along with the employment of the father and the balance of the conflicting challenges and issues. As a single dad with a young child, I already face challenges when it comes to raising my child, providing a good home and good health for the child; but in addition I am in the U.S. Army and my duties and responsibilities necessarily….

Works Cited

Britt, T.W., Adler, A.B., and Castro, C.A. (2006). Military Life: The military family. Chicago,

IL: Greenwood Publishing Group.

Lieke, L, Brummelhuis, T., and Van Der Lippe, T. (2010). Effective Work-Life Balance

Support for Various Household Structures. Human Resource Management, 49(2), 173-193.

Parents Raise Children Adequately Single

132). hen women reported that their desire for greater social support was satisfied, the outcomes reported for their children improved dramatically. The negative associations with single parenting thus have more to do with the circumstances that can give birth to single parenting, or are attached to single parenting because of the way our society is structured. In society, we have come to regard the nuclear family as the norm and single parents do not always have the multigenerational support that could give their children positive role models of both genders that they may have in previous eras. Single parents are more likely to be female, and females are traditionally underpaid for their labor. Additionally companies are not always willing to make accommodations for male or female single parent's need for flexible schedules. But the problem is not with single parenting; rather the problem is with how our society views parenthood in….

Burden, Dianne S. "Single Parents and the Work Setting: The Impact of Multiple Job and Homelife Responsibilities." Family Relations. Vol. 35. No. 1. The Single Parent Family. Jan., 1986. pp. 37-43

Hanson, Shirley M. "Single Parents and the Work Setting: The Impact of Multiple Job and Homelife Responsibilities." Family Relations. Vol. 35. No. 1. The Single Parent Family. Jan., 1986. pp. 125-132.

DeLeire, Thomas & Ariel Kalil. "Good things come in 3's: Single-parent multigenerational family structure and adolescent adjustment." Harris Graduate School of Public Policy Studies. Oct 2001. 4 Apr 2008.  http://www.spc.uchicago.edu/prc/pdfs/deleir02.pdf 

Walker, Victoria. Pagewise. 2002. 4 Apr 2008. http://www.essortment.com/all/singleparentfa_rcsc.htm

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parent families caused by adoption by a single parent and divorce. A two parent family will always be considered the perfect family as it allows for a male and…

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This method presents only evidence of whether there is a difference in the mean of two groups, so in this case showed there to be a difference in…

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Therapist to Single-Parents Therapists serve many roles in their careers. However, when working with single-parent families, that role gets multiplied. When working with single parents, therapists need to be aware…

Grant Proposal

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Target population is single parents and low-income parents in Sacramento County and Northern California. The goals are to emphasize the benefits that could be derived from raising children in…

Special Strengths and Challenges of the Single-Parent Family Special Challenges and Strengths of the Family Headed by a Single Parent The objective of this work in writing is to answer questions…

Family / Marriage

The single parent living on campus is in a unique position unlike any other student in college today. The single parent, typically a young female, is determined and motivated…

There are many of these individuals, and it is time that this is changed. Parents often look away from these kinds of problems, or they spend their time in…

parent with a young child and a demanding job -- whether it is a mother or a father -- has challenges that a family with both parents on…

132). hen women reported that their desire for greater social support was satisfied, the outcomes reported for their children improved dramatically. The negative associations with single parenting thus have more…

six women facing the sea with their arms raised in heart hands

Embracing single life: Love, intimacy and family beyond the couple

She’s 70 and has lived alone her entire adult life.

But when she told the world that this was by choice — and that she was happy and fulfilled — the response was overwhelming. Her personal story, and more than three decades of research on single people around the world, had struck a chord. 

“I’ve written lots and lots of things, both academic and more popular, and nothing has gotten the reaction of that essay,” said social scientist Bella DePaulo , a foremost scholar on single life and academic affiliate of the Department of Psychological & Brain Sciences at UC Santa Barbara. Her article published in HuffPost ahead of the release of her new book  “Single at Heart: The Power, Freedom, and Heart-Filling Joy of Single Life” (Apollo, 2023) garnered a firestorm of responses. More than a hundred people wrote her personal emails describing how they had never felt so validated. The impact of her research is also seen in the 1.7 million views of her 2017  TedX talk, where she debunked the idea that marriage leads to happiness.

DePaulo describes herself as “single at heart,” a term she coined to challenge the notion that single life is something people settle for. Rather, she has shown through her research that for the single at heart, “being unpartnered is key to their most joyful, fulfilling, authentic and psychologically rich life.”

Bella DePaulo wears a gray suit

Bella DePaulo

Bella DePaulo (Ph.D., Harvard University) has always been single and always will be.

Using survey data from more than 20,000 people from over 100 countries, and drawing from research by other social scientists, DePaulo shows that contrary to conventional wisdom, those who embrace single life grow happier over time and are better situated to navigate old age than those who built their lives around romantic relationships.

“The research shatters the stereotype that single people are all sad and lonely and that as they get older, they get even more lonely, sad and isolated,” she said. “For people who love being single, who are embracing single life and investing in it, there are all sorts of rewards.”

One critical advantage to embracing single life she noted is that the single at heart have the freedom to travel and live how and where they want. They also typically experience stronger friendships that have been prioritized over the years, report lower rates of loneliness at all ages, and more often commit to their communities and causes. Intimacy as well may look different for single people because they define it on their own terms and embrace concepts of love that encompass more than just romantic relationships.  

People who want to be single, DePaulo emphasized, will often invest in their friends and the people who mean a lot to them. “They end up having what I call ‘the ones’ instead of ‘the one,’” she said. 

DePaulo points to research that shows that on average when couples move in together and when they marry, they become more insular. They become more focused on each other and they see their friends and family less often. “People who are coupled, especially in committed couples or marriages, are really focused on each other, and that may seem romantic, and it can be,” she added.

“But they are also losing out on bigger, broader notions of love, intimacy and family. People who are single at heart understand that love encompasses far more than just romantic love. They understand that intimacy can include sexual intimacy, but it also includes emotional intimacy. They understand that family can be the people we typically think of as family, but it also can include the people we choose to treat as family, the people who are most meaningful to us.

book cover

“I think of it not as a lesser life or a more limiting life, but a more expansive life.”

There is, however, one element of being single that DePaulo decries: the stigma around it, the strong social pressure against it and the tax privileges denied to it. Part of her project extends beyond research and into social change as calls into question these social inequities and exclusions. As she tries to move the dial on perceptions and protections for single people, she sees it as part of the same movement as feminism, gay marriage and LGBTQ rights.    

“It’s part of this bigger project of people getting to be who they really are and live their best, most fulfilling lives,” she added.

Debra Herrick Associate Editorial Director (805) 893-2191 [email protected]

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