Descriptive Paragraph- The person I Dislike Most Paragraph | Short & Long | 100, 150, 200 and 300 Words.

The person I Dislike Most Paragraph edumantra.net

There could be anyone from your neighbour to, a distant family member, or even an acquaintance irritating you. Well, today we’re going to be talking about the person I dislike most. Read short and long the person I dislike most paragraph. These are helpful for students in various classes.

The Person I Dislike most Paragraph- 100 Words. Based on a bad Student.

Sudeep, a fellow student, is someone I strongly dislike due to his bad habits . He possesses behaviors that are bothersome and unpleasant to be around. He often engages in disruptive actions during class, causing distractions and hindering the learning environment . Additionally, Sudeep has a habit of being disrespectful towards both teachers and peers, which creates tension and negativity. His lack of discipline and disregard for rules further adds to my disapproval. Interacting with Sudeep is challenging and unpleasant, as his actions impact the overall classroom experience. However, despite my dislike for him, I try to maintain a sense of understanding and focus on my own growth and positive relationships. It’s important to remember that everyone has their own struggles and challenges, and perhaps with time, Sudeep can change his ways for the better.

Person I Dislike most Paragraph edumantra.net

  • Paragraph on Can Artificial Intelligence Replace Human Intelligence
  • Paragraph on Deforestation
  • Amazing Paragraph on Dog
  • Paragraph on Elephant
  • Paragraph About English

The Person I Dislike most Paragraph- 150 Words Based on a bad Neighbour.

Mr. Rizwan, my neighbor, is the person I dislike the most. He has a habit of being inconsiderate and causing trouble for others. He frequently plays loud music late into the night, disrupting the peace in our neighborhood. Despite numerous requests from other neighbors, he shows no regard for our need for a quiet environment. Additionally, Mr. Rizwan is careless with his garbage disposal, often leaving trash outside his house, which attracts pests and creates an unsightly environment. His lack of respect for communal spaces and the well-being of others frustrates me greatly. Interacting with Mr. Rizwan is challenging as he seems indifferent to the inconvenience he causes. I believe it is crucial to be considerate and respectful towards our neighbors, and I find it disheartening that Mr. Rizwan disregards these principles. Despite my dislike for him, I strive to maintain a peaceful coexistence and hope that he becomes more mindful of his actions in the future.

Paragraph on the Person I Dislike Most- 300 Words. Based on a Bad Class Fellow.

Sandy is the person whom I hate most. He is lazy and idle. He does not value time. He shirks work. He is most irregular and unpunctual. He is always late for school. He never comes with his homework. He is always standing on the bench. He is his own enemy. He is always in the company of bad boys. He commits mistakes after, mistakes. He is great mischief- monger. He always indulges in gossips, He wastes his time. He is quite careless. He is never serious. He is a fool of the first water. His parents are very much sick of him. They are fed up with his antics and pranks. The neighbours come to his parents with complaints against him. They are always tired of him because of his misbehavior and bad manners. He is a cunning fellow, putting the blame at others’ doors. Fie never admits his fault. He pretends to be innocent and harmless. In reality, he is a rogue and a knave. He fails in every home-test. He has been in the same class for the last three years. When he is asked the cause of the repeated ‘failures, he smiles like a ruffian and replies that he is gaining experience. He is strengthening his foundation. May God save us from his bad influence! His very shadow is full of hatred. He is given to bad habits. He drinks and gambles. He is a vagabond. He is not fit to be called a true friend of anyone. He is extremely quarrelsome. He is a source of constant trouble to others. He shrugs his shoulders in irresponsibility. He is a great nuisance. He is an all-time headache. He has been caned time and again by the Principal of the school. He has been punished by his parents. There is the least improvement in him. He is incorrigible. May God give him sense and wisdom!

Related Posts

Appreciation of poem The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost edumantra.net

100 Ways to Say «I Hate You» intelligently

Two people quarrel

Addressing animosity or contempt towards another person is a challenging predicament that requires delicacy and tact. In our journey of life, we encounter individuals with whom we simply don’t gel, and that’s okay. It’s crucial to remember that when dealing with someone you dislike, it’s always better to express yourself honestly but respectfully. It is not about causing hurt, but about communicating our feelings without allowing negativity to rule our behavior. Here are 100 examples of phrases to say to someone you dislike while maintaining dignity and respect. But remember: somethimes is better to say one of the expression from the list we say when don’t know what to say , except something rude.

  • «Our views differ greatly, and I find it hard to connect with you.»
  • «I respect your right to your opinion, even though I don’t agree with it.»
  • «I think it’s best if we keep our interactions professional.»
  • «Our personalities seem to clash. Maybe we’re better off keeping some distance.»
  • «I feel uncomfortable around you, and I would like to limit our contact.»
  • «It’s challenging for me to engage with you positively.»
  • «I believe it’s best for both of us if we minimize our contact.»
  • «I feel a sense of friction between us that I’d rather avoid.»
  • «Our perspectives don’t align, and it’s causing unnecessary stress.»
  • «I find it difficult to have a constructive conversation with you.»
  • «Our interactions often leave me feeling upset.»
  • «I would prefer if we could maintain a professional relationship.»
  • «I have a hard time appreciating our differences.»
  • «I think we would both benefit from spending less time together.»
  • «I would like to keep our relationship strictly professional.»
  • «I find it challenging to understand your viewpoint.»
  • «Our disagreements are causing me stress.»
  • «I have a hard time finding common ground with you.»
  • «I feel we would both be happier with some distance between us.»
  • «Our personalities don’t seem to gel.»
  • «I don’t think we are bringing out the best in each other.»
  • «I think our interactions often end in misunderstandings.»
  • «I’d prefer if we could maintain our distance.»
  • «Our constant disagreements are tiring.»
  • «I think we would do well to keep our interactions minimal.»
  • «I struggle with the negativity that comes from our arguments.»
  • «It seems like our relationship is causing more harm than good.»
  • «I find it difficult to have productive discussions with you.»
  • «Our constant differences are causing me stress.»
  • «I believe it’s healthier for both of us if we keep some distance.»

A quarrel between a boy and a girl

The above examples may serve as a guide, but they should be adapted to fit your specific situation and the person you’re speaking to. Remember, it’s all about expressing your feelings honestly without resorting to aggression or spitefulness. And that, dear reader, is the key to maintaining our dignity and peace, even in the face of dislike or hatred.

  • «Our communication often leads to confusion. I’d prefer if we minimized our interactions.»
  • «We have fundamentally different outlooks, making it hard for me to connect with you.»
  • «I struggle to see eye-to-eye with you.»
  • «Our frequent confrontations leave me feeling drained.»
  • «Our chemistry doesn’t seem to be in harmony.»
  • «We have distinct personalities that don’t align well.»
  • «Our interactions often result in conflicts that I’d rather avoid.»
  • «I feel it’s best to keep our personal and professional lives separate.»
  • «Our constant disagreements are causing unnecessary tension.»
  • «I prefer if we could maintain a respectful distance from each other.»
  • «Our lack of mutual understanding often leads to disagreements.»
  • «It would be healthier for me to limit my exposure to our negative interactions.»
  • «We seem to have contrasting perspectives that lead to frequent clashes.»
  • «Our continued arguments are affecting my peace of mind.»
  • «I think it’s best if we stick to formal communication.»
  • «Our personal differences seem to create a hostile environment.»
  • «I find our constant bickering unproductive.»
  • «I struggle to find common ground with you, which is causing me distress.»
  • «I believe we are both adding to a negative atmosphere.»
  • «Our differing opinions seem to lead to more conflict than agreement.»
  • «We’re not on the same wavelength, and it’s leading to misunderstandings.»
  • «Our interactions don’t seem to promote a positive environment.»
  • «We seem to be more in disagreement than agreement.»
  • «I find our conflicting personalities hard to reconcile.»
  • «We tend to see things from opposing viewpoints, leading to friction.»
  • «Our conflicting beliefs cause more disagreements than productive conversations.»
  • «I’d rather keep our relationship strictly professional to avoid misunderstandings.»
  • «We seem to have different values that often clash.»
  • «I struggle to maintain a harmonious relationship with you.»
  • «Our personal differences are causing more conflict than necessary.»
  • «I find our lack of mutual understanding tiring.»
  • «Our constant battles are wearing me down.»
  • «We don’t seem to be able to communicate without conflict.»
  • «Our constant clashing is draining my energy.»
  • «We often misunderstand each other, leading to conflicts.»
  • «I find it difficult to maintain a positive outlook during our disagreements.»
  • «We appear to be at odds more often than not.»
  • «Our conflicting attitudes cause unnecessary tension.»
  • «We don’t seem to be able to have a conversation without arguing.»
  • «Our differing perspectives lead to more friction than understanding.»
  • «I struggle to cope with our constant differences.»
  • «Our opposing viewpoints are causing a strain on our relationship.»
  • «We often fail to see eye-to-eye, leading to conflicts.»
  • «Our constant differences in opinion are creating a stressful environment.»
  • «We don’t seem to be able to communicate effectively.»
  • «I find our disagreements more exhausting than constructive.»
  • «We seem to struggle to maintain a harmonious interaction.»
  • «I feel drained by our frequent arguments.»
  • «Our personal differences are causing too much strain.»
  • «Our conflicting ideologies are creating a hostile atmosphere.»
  • «We seem to misunderstand each other more often than not.»
  • «I find our conflicting personalities too stressful.»
  • «We seem to disagree more often than we agree.»
  • «I struggle to find commonality with you.»
  • «Our frequent clashes are exhausting me.»
  • «We have fundamentally different beliefs that lead to more conflict than agreement.»
  • «I find our constant arguments more tiring than beneficial.»
  • «Our contrasting ideologies are causing unnecessary friction.»
  • «We don’t seem to have the same wavelength, leading to misunderstandings.»
  • «I find it stressful to constantly be at odds with you.»
  • «Our contrasting attitudes are creating a negative environment.»
  • «We often clash on most issues, causing tension.»
  • «I find our continual disagreements draining.»
  • «Our differing perspectives often result in misunderstandings.»
  • «We seem to have different expectations and viewpoints that lead to arguments.»
  • «I struggle to maintain a positive interaction with you.»
  • «We seem to be at constant odds, which is causing me stress.»
  • «Our conflicting personalities are creating an unproductive environment.»
  • «We often misinterpret each other, leading to unnecessary conflicts.»
  • «Our constant friction is causing me distress, and I would prefer to limit our interaction.»

Navigating a relationship with someone you dislike can be tricky. The aim should be to express your feelings without instigating further conflict. It’s about setting boundaries that protect your mental and emotional health. Although these examples provide a template, remember, each situation is unique, and you must tweak the responses accordingly. Take a step back, evaluate your feelings, and choose words that are true to your sentiments without crossing the line into hostility.

  • What to say to a girl who's feeling down (phrases)
  • Navigating the Delicate Path: What to Say When Someone is Sick
  • What to Say to Someone Who is Dying (emotional phrases)
  • 75+ phrases to “Thank You” in different ways
  • What to Say Instead of "Thank you": 50 Engaging Ways to Express Gratitude
  • 50 Things to Say to Someone Going Through Hard Times

Meeting friends on the street

Everyday Health Logo

All About Hate: Definition, Health Effects, and How to Cope With It

Seth Gillihan, PhD

Hatred is a real and powerful emotion that can cause serious damage to the person who feels it as well as to whatever or whomever the hate is focused on. It’s complicated and often deep-rooted, which can make it difficult to heal.

“Hate stems from personal perceptions of powerlessness or experience in which we feel injured or mistreated by others,” says Stephanie Carnes, PhD, LCSW , a therapist in New York City. “Sometimes hatred can even be rooted in a perceived threat to our survival as individuals, which naturally triggers a strong emotional response.”

What Is Hate?

The word “hate” is thrown around more often than the actual emotion is felt. The statement “I hate broccoli” is rarely accompanied by the strong negative emotion of true hatred.

Even strong feelings of anger or disgust are not the same as hate. “Hate is a profoundly intense and enduring dislike for someone or something. Hate can be tenacious, and often has roots in mistrust, fear, or (lack of) individual power, and vulnerability,” says Dr. Carnes.

It can be hard to distinguish hate from other powerful negative emotions that you may be feeling at the same time. Some psychologists say what makes hate different is that it’s directed toward who or what someone or something is, rather than what they’ve done. In a review of research on hate published in 2018 , the authors say anger and revenge come from wanting to change a behavior or situation, or to fix or repay a wrong. But with hate, you believe the person or thing on the receiving end can’t be changed, and you want to eliminate or destroy it.

Common Questions & Answers

Hate is a strong negative emotion. A hate crime is a violent or threatening action committed because of bias against a particular group. The legal definitions vary by jurisdiction, according to the Justice Department , but targets of hate crimes are often immigrants, people of color, or members of the LGBTQ+ community.

What Causes Hate?

Hate rarely arises from a single experience or event unless the event is traumatizing or could be interpreted as a threat to a person's livelihood or safety.

“It’s possible to hate an employer who breaks an agreement and threatens termination if an individual refuses to work on weekends. It’s possible for an individual to hate a bully or a person who threatens them with physical harm,” explains Gideon Javna, LCSW , a therapist in private practice in Richmond, Virginia.

Hate can be something you’re taught when you’re part of a group that perceives a threat from another group of people.

“Perception is not always reality. If an individual hates a group of people based on stories told by their peers, it’s important to challenge these stories with exposure and education,” says Javna.

Types of Hate

Hate can be directed externally — at another person, a group of people, or even a situation or an idea. It can also be directed internally, at yourself.

General Hate

Hate that’s directed externally is typically caused by a personal threat or experience that triggers a strong sense of fear, mistrust, loss of power, or vulnerability. The feeling of hatred can be specific or more general. You may hate your alcoholic father because of how he treats you when he’s drinking, or you may hate alcohol in general, because of the role it’s played in your experiences.

“When we become intensely critical of ourselves, we may experience self-hatred, in which the narratives we tell about ourselves are saturated with negativity and contempt,” Carnes explains. Self-hate may arise when you fail to meet expectations you or others have for yourself. It can be based on things like your appearance, your performance at school or at work, or the way you interact and relate with others. It may not have any basis in reality.

Systemic Hate

There are countless situations around the world in which a culture or group views another culture or group as a threat. The feelings of hate aren’t necessarily directed at a specific person, but at the group as a whole. Racism, xenophobia, nativism, anti-semitism, bigotry, and homophobia are examples of systemic hate. “Hate is founded on a diffuse sense that members of a target group are inferior, threatening, or have negative intentions,” says Carnes.

Internalized Hate

Internalized hate is a form of self-hate that arises as a by-product of systemic hate. “Internalized hatred can occur when an individual from a minority community experiences a form of broadly defined hate so pervasively that those perceptions of inferiority become internalized as their own internal narrative,” explains Carnes.

Symptoms of Hate and How Hate Affects Your Health

Little research has been done to analyze hate’s specific symptoms or physical effects. But hate often coincides with other strong emotions, like anger, humiliation, or powerlessness, all of which take a toll. Hate can manifest in a person's behavior and psychology in a number of ways.

Angry or Violent Outbursts

Hate and anger are different emotions, but strong feelings of hate can lead to angry outbursts or violence. “Some research has linked strongly negative emotions, including hate, to heightened cortisol levels and overstimulation of the nervous system,” says Carnes. This overstimulation can manifest as a “fight or flight” response, leading to yelling or physically lashing out.

Anxiety is an emotion that can come from fear , and  research indicates hate is often rooted in fear. People who experience high levels of hate may also be more likely to experience anxiety.

Self-hating feelings like worthlessness are one of the symptoms doctors use to diagnose depression , according to the National Institute of Mental Health. When hate is directed outward, the emotion often arises when a person feels helpless, which is another symptom of depression.

Other Mental Health Diagnoses Like PTSD

When hatred comes from a traumatic event or experience, it’s quite possible that the person also has post-traumatic stress disorder . According to the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs , people with PTSD are more likely to respond to any stressful situation with feelings of anger.

How to Prevent Hate

Carnes and Javna say self-awareness is key to preventing or coping with hate. Identify what or who triggers hate in you, and ask yourself why.

For instance, maybe you hated a certain teacher because they humiliated you in front of the class, and you felt powerless to remedy the situation. You may find yourself hating teachers or school in general, even without a specific threat or chance that you’ll be humiliated again.

Therapy can help you identify and address this type of learned emotional response based on specific triggers. “When we have the opportunity to process, make meaning, and heal from our old psychological wounds, we are more likely to employ healthy coping skills in situations that may provoke intense emotional responses,” says Carnes.

When it comes to systemic hate, studies indicate education may help change behaviors and attitudes with school-based programs to prevent behaviors like bullying , online harassment, racism, and discrimination.

Teaching acceptance, both at school and at home, is also among the strategies promoted by the Southern Poverty Law Center as a way to end systemic hate. Others include:

  • Examine your own prejudices.
  • Put pressure on community and political leaders.
  • Build connections with people outside your normal social group.
  • Support victims of hate.
  • Speak out within your personal network and through social media against acts of hate.

How to Cope With Hate

Awareness of your emotions is the first step to coping with hate inside you. When you feel it, start by soothing your central nervous system. Carnes suggests taking a walk, playing with a pet, listening to music, or breathing deeply.

She then suggests asking yourself these questions to assess the feelings you experienced:

  • Why did this emotion arise at this moment?
  • Have I felt like this before?
  • What emotions might lie beneath the surface?
  • What thoughts do I experience around this emotion?
  • What are the common situations in which I experience hate, and perhaps more importantly, why these situations?
  • Could my past experiences of fear, trauma, or rejection be shaping the way I view this hated individual or situation?

“This exploration can be challenging, especially when hate is rooted in personal pain, trauma, or unhealed psychological wounds,” Carnes emphasizes. Coping methods like expressive writing, talk therapy, or spiritual practice are effective options.

When Hate Is Healthy and When It’s Not

Javna points out that it’s okay to feel any of our emotions. It is a normal human experience to feel hatred at times, and you don't have to force yourself to feel differently or try to erase the feelings, especially if they're directed toward someone who seriously hurt you.

But hate can cause negative consequences for each of us and for society as a whole. Says Carnes, “Unlike some emotions that can become catalysts for motivation or empowerment, hate is a heavy, burdensome emotion that can become toxic.”

Research on hate shows that when it’s experienced within a group, it can feel self-protective and reassuring. A study looking at online white supremacist groups found that people who join them can turn feelings of fear and shame into power, pride, and belonging.

While that might sound positive, the research shows hate is negative overall — leading to more division, conflict escalation, and violence.

“Even if the roots of hatred feel justified, the negative net effects on physical and mental health impede our ability to experience fulfillment, connection, and well-being,” Carnes says.

Resources We Trust

Many organizations help people learn to manage strong emotions and fight systemic hate. Here are some of Everyday Health’s top resources.

Emotions Anonymous

This is a 12-step recovery program to help anyone experiencing emotional difficulties.

Human Rights Campaign

Find resources here to support and reduce hate and violence against the LGBTQ+ community.

Southern Poverty Law Center

This 50-year-old organization has resources for tracking and working to reduce hate and discrimination in America.

Favorite Online Support Network

Health Unlocked: Anxiety and Depression Support

This social network created by the Anxiety & Depression Association of America offers support for people experiencing anxiety and depression in conjunction with hate.

Favorite Apps

Sponsored by the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, this app helps service members and veterans manage PTSD.

Practice meditation and mindfulness to work with your emotions and manage stress.

Ahead: Emotions Coach

Learn to manage anger and other strong emotions.

Favorite Video

What We Can Do About the Culture of Hate

Get inspired by the TED Talk given by the activist and author Sally Kohn.

Editorial Sources and Fact-Checking

Everyday Health follows strict sourcing guidelines to ensure the accuracy of its content, outlined in our editorial policy . We use only trustworthy sources, including peer-reviewed studies, board-certified medical experts, patients with lived experience, and information from top institutions.

  • Fischer A et al. Why We Hate. Emotion Review . 2018.
  • Shapiro JL. We Hate What We Fear: Interpersonal Hate From a Clinical Perspective. The Psychology of Love and Hate in Intimate Relationships . 2016.
  • Depression. National Institute of Mental Health . 2021.
  • PTSD: National Center for PTSD. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs.
  • Losinski M et al. Schools as Change Agents in Reducing Bias and Discrimination: Shaping Behaviors and Attitudes. Journal of Child and Family Studies . 2019.
  • Ten Ways to Fight Hate: A Community Response Guide. Southern Poverty Law Center . August 14, 2017.
  • Gottschalk S. Accelerators, Amplifiers, and Conductors: A Model of Tertiary Deviance in Online White Supremacist Networks. Deviant Behavior . 2020.
  • Learn About Hate Crimes. U.S. Department of Justice . July 21, 2023.

Cart

  • SUGGESTED TOPICS
  • The Magazine
  • Newsletters
  • Managing Yourself
  • Managing Teams
  • Work-life Balance
  • The Big Idea
  • Data & Visuals
  • Reading Lists
  • Case Selections
  • HBR Learning
  • Topic Feeds
  • Account Settings
  • Email Preferences

How to Work with Someone You Hate

Working with someone you hate can be distracting and draining. Pompous jerk, annoying nudge, or incessant complainer, an insufferable colleague can negatively affect your attitude and performance. Instead of focusing on the work you have to do together, you may end up wasting time and energy trying to keep your emotions in check and attempting […]

Working with someone you hate can be distracting and draining. Pompous jerk, annoying nudge, or incessant complainer, an insufferable colleague can negatively affect your attitude and performance. Instead of focusing on the work you have to do together, you may end up wasting time and energy trying to keep your emotions in check and attempting to manage the person’s behavior. Fortunately, with the right tactics, you can still have a productive working relationship with someone you can’t stand.

  • Amy Gallo is a contributing editor at Harvard Business Review, cohost of the Women at Work podcast , and the author of two books: Getting Along: How to Work with Anyone (Even Difficult People) and the HBR Guide to Dealing with Conflict . She writes and speaks about workplace dynamics. Watch her TEDx talk on conflict and follow her on LinkedIn . amyegallo

Partner Center

  • Bipolar Disorder
  • Therapy Center
  • When To See a Therapist
  • Types of Therapy
  • Best Online Therapy
  • Best Couples Therapy
  • Best Family Therapy
  • Managing Stress
  • Sleep and Dreaming
  • Understanding Emotions
  • Self-Improvement
  • Healthy Relationships
  • Student Resources
  • Personality Types
  • Guided Meditations
  • Verywell Mind Insights
  • 2023 Verywell Mind 25
  • Mental Health in the Classroom
  • Editorial Process
  • Meet Our Review Board
  • Crisis Support

'I Hate People:' Why You Feel This Way and What to Do

Sanjana is a health writer and editor. Her work spans various health-related topics, including mental health, fitness, nutrition, and wellness.

essay for someone you hate

Verywell / Theresa Chiechi

Reasons Why You Might Hate People

Consequences of hating people, coping strategies if you hate people.

It isn't uncommon to hear people say that they hate people. The reality is that no one likes every single person they’ve met. Most people can probably name a few people that they don’t particularly like. However, some people reach a stage where they get so annoyed , hurt, or frustrated with people or circumstances that they feel like they hate everyone. 

Feeling this way can make it difficult for you to go about your life and interact with people on a day-to-day basis. It can cause a lot of conflict in your relationships with family , friends, colleagues, and other people in your life. Hate is also an intense emotion that can take a toll on your health.

This article explores some of the reasons why you might feel like you hate people, how this emotion can affect your physical and mental health, as well as some coping strategies that may be helpful. 

What causes you to hate people? There are a number of reasons, but some possible explanations for why you might feel this way include:

  • Stress: Stress can make you feel overwhelmed, panicky, irritable, and even angry. Prolonged stress can lead to angry outbursts, which can escalate to the point where you feel like you hate everyone.
  • Social anxiety: Social anxiety can make it difficult for you to interact with people and lead to emotions like nervousness, fear, embarrassment, and distress. In some cases, people with social anxiety may even react to situations that make them uncomfortable with anger and hatred.
  • Introverted personality: While some people tend to be outgoing and gregarious, others prefer to keep to themselves. If you’re an introvert , socializing with people outside your immediate circle can be emotionally draining. Sometimes, this can lead to agitation and hatred of people and situations outside your comfort zone.
  • Ideological differences: Having different political , religious, cultural, or social beliefs and values as others can cause you to feel angry with, and perhaps hateful toward, others whom you feel are “against” you, says Kristen Farrell Turner , PhD, a psychologist and educator at Pritikin Longevity Center. Turner says an “us versus them” mentality can induce angry, hateful feelings.

If you feel this way, you might also wonder if it is normal to hate people so much. It is absolutely normal to dislike people or have negative feelings about them. Disliking spending time with others or just generally preferring to be alone can be signs of personality traits like introversion.

However, feelings of constant, pervasive, and intense hatred for others may be a sign of something more serious. If your hatred is causing distress, leading to isolation, and negatively affecting your mental well-being, it is important to take a closer look at the causes and consider talking to a mental health professional.

A person who hates people is sometimes called a misanthrope. While it is not a mental disorder, misanthropy may sometimes be a sign of a mental health condition, such as anxiety, depression, or antisocial personality disorder.

Turner describes how hate can adversely affect your mental and physical health. 

Impact on Mental Health

Hatred is a very extreme feeling that, compared with other often-related unpleasant feelings like anger or frustration, leaves little, if any, room for connectedness or empathy. 

Kristen Farrell Turner, PhD

Furthermore, feeling hatred toward others will rob you of enjoyable life experiences. Not only does hatred require a great deal of cognitive and emotional energy, it also inhibits you from connecting with others and enriching your life.

Hatred may also involve the feeling of disgust, and if you are disgusted with everyone, you want nothing to do with them. When you take connectedness and empathy off the table, you definitely reduce your cognitive and emotional coping options.

Impact on Physical Health

Hatred is a distressing feeling that requires a lot of emotional energy . Distressing feelings often prompt people to seek unhealthy self-soothing behaviors, such as eating comfort foods or using alcohol or other substances to suppress and avoid their distress.

These feelings may also be combined with a tendency to withdraw from healthy activities such as exercising and spending time with supportive friends and family. 

Also, suppose one experiences the feeling of hate often coupled with the sympathetic nervous system’s fight or flight response . In that case, that person might eventually experience some long-term consequences of chronic stress, such as systemic inflammation. 

So, whether through unhealthy self-soothing to cope with the feeling or long-term sympathetic nervous system activation, chronically feeling hatred toward others could adversely affect your health. 

What should you do if you hate people? It can be a distressing and often isolating way to feel, so it is important to take steps to improve your outlook on humanity. Learning to recognize cognitive distortions and negative thinking can help, as can learning to be more empathetic toward others.

Turner suggests some strategies that can be helpful if you feel like you hate everyone:

  • Avoid all-or-nothing thinking: If your hatred toward others is rooted in a disagreement with them about a specific issue, try to remember that you can disagree–and even be angry–with others without hating them. Just because you strongly disagree with someone else’s beliefs or behavior does not mean that person is all bad. This type of thinking is called all or nothing thinking , and it is irrational. Remind yourself that your feelings of hate are about the issue, not the person.
  • Avoid generalizing: If your hatred toward others focuses on a group of people, such as people of a certain race , region, or religion, your thinking is irrational because you are generalizing. You are lumping an entire group of people into one “bad” category and making assumptions about them based on a demographic characteristic.
  • Practice empathy: Nuance and empathy are antidotes to irrational thoughts. It’s important to understand that no one is all good or all bad. Putting yourself in someone else’s shoes, while not always easy, can go a long way toward increasing empathy and reducing hate. Just as you have your reasons for your beliefs and behaviors, so do others. 
  • Prioritize self-care: It’s important to prioritize your needs and take care of yourself. For instance, if you are stressed out, you may need to make changes to your life to better cope. Or, if you are an introvert, you may need to set boundaries that help make you more comfortable. 
  • Seek therapy: Therapy can help you explore your feelings and understand why you hate everyone. It can also help you be more empathetic, build healthy relationships, and develop alternative coping skills.

Get Help Now

We've tried, tested, and written unbiased reviews of the best online therapy programs including Talkspace, Betterhelp, and Regain. Find out which option is the best for you.

A Word From Verywell

Frequently experiencing anger, frustration, or discomfort can make you feel like you hate everyone. These emotions can take a toll on your mental and physical health, and make life a lot less enjoyable for you. Practicing empathy can help you change your mindset and make things more pleasant for you.

By Sanjana Gupta Sanjana is a health writer and editor. Her work spans various health-related topics, including mental health, fitness, nutrition, and wellness.

How To Interact With Someone Who Hates You

When someone hates you, the reasons can vary widely, from an old friendship that was broken up by a disagreement or a misunderstanding to opposing values  or even prejudice . Regardless of the reason, being hated can hurt. Below, we’ll explore some of the potential effects of feeling hated by someone, along with actions you can take to try and resolve the situation.

The potential effects of being hated

Our drive to feel accepted by our peers is an evolutionary mechanism. In the early days of humankind, social acceptance correlated with the safety available in community, since individuals were generally not able to survive on their own. Even today, research suggests a correlation between strong social support and  better mental and physical health . This evolutionary history is likely at least part of why it can be so painful to be rejected or even hated by someone now. 

Feeling hated by someone can also be taxing if it’s a person we have to deal with regularly, like a neighbor or coworker. Trying to navigate your daily life while you face negativity or even hostility from someone can make everything more difficult. 

What to do about someone who hates you

It’s important to remember that improving the situation isn’t always possible, and sometimes simply dealing with the matter by working through your own feelings may be necessary. Often times, a person who hates someone else has that hatred from their own problems, not yours, like negative feelings and internal struggles, or from snap judgments that they don’t care to rectify. Other times, if a person hates you, improving the situation isn’t worth the effort, such as if you rarely encounter the person in your daily life, or if it would be emotionally unsafe to engage with them about the issue. However, if you have to regularly interact with someone who hates you, you might be able to implement some of the strategies below to at least defuse the hostility between you and move your relationship in a positive direction. These tend to be some of the ways successful people deal with someone who hates them. Remember that it’s generally advisable to avoid engaging with this person at all if it seems unsafe for you to do so. 

Find out the cause of their feelings

If it’s safe for you to do so, you might approach the situation by directly, politely asking the person why they have a problem with you. Perhaps there was a past incident that you’d forgotten about but that continues to bother them. Or, it could be that they misunderstood something you said or did, or that they made incorrect assumptions about who you are or what you stand for. Perhaps you took what they saw as constructive criticism as a purposeful insult, and they don’t hate you at all. If the other person seems open to a calm, civil discussion, the two of you may be able to iron out the issue by apologizing for any past hurts, clarifying any disconnections, and agreeing to disagree where necessary; this may be the best course of action. Even if they’re not receptive, you can feel confident that you did what you could to try and resolve the problem and set healthy boundaries.

Examine your own behavior and your own feelings

As mentioned earlier, there are many different reasons why one person might hate another. In many cases, it has more to do with the individual holding the hateful feelings than the one who is the target of them. That said, it could also be that the other party has some grounds to dislike you. If you truly don’t know why they might feel this way, it could be worth taking a step back and examining your own behavior as objectively as possible. Cultivating self-awareness as you deal with someone who hates you can be crucial.

If they’re part of your social circle, do you make them feel excluded and ignore or interrupt them when they speak? If you work with them, are you adding tasks to their plate or taking credit for projects they’ve done? If they’re your neighbor, are you frequently being disruptive at late hours? Sometimes, things that deeply bother one person might go unnoticed by another, so thinking critically about your interactions with the individual who hates you can inspire you to make some reasonable shifts that may make them feel more heard, comfortable, or respected. You might even ask your friends or family members for their honest perspective on the situation. It’s possible you did absolutely nothing wrong, but it can still be important to seek the objective truth of the situation.

Avoid conflict when experiencing negative feelings

If you’re unable to figure out or resolve the issue this person has with you, it’s usually in your best interest to simply avert additional conflict with them going forward. If you can avoid interacting with them at all, it may be best for everyone. If you have to interact with this individual, keeping things as calm and civil as possible could be the most beneficial course of action. Try to stay positive, maintain self-confidence, and find peace with the situation.

Some people who feel hatred toward others might try to pick fights with them. If you experience this, you might try and focus on deescalation through empathy, patience, and rationality. If you encounter them in a place of school or work and they deliberately try to provoke you, you may be able to report them to a manager or administrator. In general, there’s no point in fighting back, and it can have consequences. The ability to be the bigger person is an attribute that many successful people have.

Shift your focus

Fixating on why someone hates you can be unproductive at best and mentally harmful at worst. If there’s nothing you can do about the situation, you might benefit from simply shifting your focus in a more positive direction. As one study on the topic suggests, prioritizing positivity can predict “a host of well-being outcomes” , so you may find yourself feeling better and enjoying life more if you can accentuate the positives in your life instead of the negative. Putting your mental energy toward people and activities you love instead of worrying about or experiencing fear regarding one person who doesn’t like you may be a more effective and beneficial approach for your life.

Respect their boundaries

If someone has shown or expressed that they don’t enjoy being around you and aren’t open to discussing or resolving the issue, it’s usually best to respect their boundaries. If they don’t want to spend time with you, you could avoid making plans with them or signing up to work on projects with them, for example. Even if you disagree with them, complying with someone’s reasonable boundaries can be a sign of basic respect. This isn’t just the case when a person hates you; it can also be vital to respect boundaries in relationships with a friend or family member.

How therapy can help when someone hates you

As covered above, suspecting or knowing that someone actively hates you can affect your mental health. If you’re looking for support in processing and coping with these feelings, meeting with a therapist could be beneficial. They can provide you with a safe space to express your emotions, understand your own feelings, and control any symptoms of anxiety or rumination you may be experiencing as a result of this situation. They can also teach you strategies for improving your self-esteem, along with skills for interpersonal communication and conflict resolution. In other words, they can act as trusted support for those who find themselves in difficult social situations.

Not everyone has the opportunity to connect with a qualified therapist who can meet their needs nearby. In cases like these, online therapy can represent a valuable alternative. With an  online therapy platform like BetterHelp, you can get matched with one of tens of thousands of licensed therapists. You can then connect with your therapist via phone, video call, and/or in-app messaging from the comfort of home without the hassle or time cost of commuting to and from a physical office. Research suggests that online therapy can offer  similar benefits  to in-person therapy in many cases, so it may be worth exploring if you’re interested in this format. See below for client reviews of BetterHelp counselors.

Counselor reviews

"She is simply amazing! In my experience, she understands my language and position, and she gives me feedback to expand on that position. I've experienced so much growth with her. My understanding of myself, how I interact with the world around me, and how/who I would like to be moving forward has developed so much with her help. Thank you so much!!!"

"Sharon Valentino has helped me through so much! Since we started working together, just a few months ago, I already feel like I have more power and control over my life. I have let go of some very painful things, I have moved away from abusive relationships and really gaining skills and tools I need to keep myself safe and happy. She has taught me that I have the power to control my thoughts, my anxiety, and most of all my company. I really like how direct she is, it helps me get grounded and connect to myself. I can't wait to see where I am after working with her a year!!!"

Frequently asked questions

How do successful people deal with someone hating them?

Many successful people are aware that not everyone is going to like them, and they usually understand that hatred often says more about the person holding those feelings than the person receiving them. That being said, another common quality of many successful people is self-awareness and the ability to take constructive criticism. If there’s any useful feedback to be had from the people who dislike them, they’re likely to consider it seriously.

What are some of the ways successful people deal with people hating them?

Some potentially effective approaches could include facing the situation directly and calmly, but not forcing a resolution if there is resistance. Successful people might also aim to act with patience and empathy and to make room for open, honest, constructive communication. 

How do you live with someone who hates you?

Perhaps some rules or boundaries can be put in place to preserve the peace, or maybe an apology needs to be made for a past conflict. If this doesn’t work, it may be worth reconsidering your living situation if possible. 

If you’re experiencing abuse of any kind from someone you live with or anyone in your life, you can contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) for immediate support, advice, and assistance.

How do you deal with someone who doesn't like you at work?

Working with someone you don’t get along with can be difficult, because you usually don’t have control over how much you have to see or interact with them. You can try approaching them calmly and directly to ask what the problem is and inquire as to whether there’s anything you can do to resolve it. If not, you might choose to agree to disagree with them and make a pact to remain as civil as possible. 

What does hatred do to a person?

Hatred may be associated with rumination, stress, and anxiety, which may all be linked to negative physical and mental health outcomes.

What causes extreme hatred?

Extreme hatred is often caused by internal feelings of insecurity, feelings of inadequacy, a fear of abandonment, or by other deep hurt and pain from the past. 

How do you deal with toxic friends?

Toxic friendships may be characterized by manipulation, put-downs, guilt, negativity, deceit, or other harmful interactions. If you’re experiencing a friendship like this, talking to your friend about how their actions are making you feel is usually a recommended first step. If they show no signs of changing their behavior, the best course of action to take next is usually to create distance and limit contact by setting and enforcing safe boundaries for yourself. 

Why do I attract toxic friends?

Codependency and low self-esteem are two of the most common reasons for continually seeming to attract toxic friends. To clarify, though, people do not necessarily “attract” toxic individuals, but instead may frequently settle for unhealthy relationships. 

Is it OK to distance yourself from family?

Painful though it may be, there are instances in which taking some distance from family may be necessary. Speaking with your family members about conflict or harmful behaviors they’re exhibiting can be a first step, and setting healthy boundaries for yourself can be a second. If these methods are unsuccessful over time, if your mental health is being negatively affected, and/or if you feel unsafe, it might be time to distance yourself from them.

  • How To Get Over Your Ex-Boyfriend And Rediscover Yourself Medically reviewed by Julie Dodson , MA
  • How To Stop Talking To Someone Who Is Unhealthy For You Medically reviewed by Julie Dodson , MA
  • Relationships and Relations

Anna Katharina Schaffner Ph.D.

The Truth About Self-Hatred

And how we can overcome it..

Posted January 17, 2023 | Reviewed by Michelle Quirk

  • How Can I Manage My Anger?
  • Find a therapist to heal from anger
  • It is too devastating for children to acknowledge that their parents might not be competent or may be cruel.
  • Self-hatred is a childhood survival strategy, but it no longer serves us in our adult life.
  • It is possible to move from self-hatred to self-compassion.

Melanie Wasser/Unsplash

The truth about self-hatred , and its more subtle cousins low self-worth, low self-esteem , and low confidence , is well-known but seldom talked about. It’s an uncomfortable topic.

Altricial vs. Precocial Species

In their early years, and indeed throughout most of their childhood , human children completely depend on their caregivers. In biological terms, we are what is called an "altricial species." Altricial birds or mammals give birth to helpless offspring. Their newly hatched or born young tend to emerge into this world with their eyes closed. They are usually immobile, lack fur or down, and can’t gather food on their own. Humans are perhaps the most altricial species there is: We remain dependent on those who are in charge of our well-being to fulfill our physical and emotional needs for much longer than other mammals.

So-called "precocial" animals, by contrast, give birth to young whose eyes are open, who have hair or down and large brains, and who are almost immediately mobile. They can flee from or defend themselves against predators relatively quickly after birth.

Why does that matter in psychological terms? It matters because, consciously or unconsciously, we are aware of our abject dependency as naked and helpless infants. Consequently, the thought that there might be something wrong with our parents—that they might not have our best interests at heart, that they might be lacking in their capacity to care for us, that they might be unloving or even behave actively aggressive and destructive toward us—is existentially threatening. In fact, it is so terrifying that we defend against it with all our might. Our psychological apparatus does all it can to keep us from knowing and feeling this truth.

Blaming Ourselves

At the heart of our defence strategy against such knowledge is the construction of narratives about ourselves and others that are more bearable. Paradoxically, then, if we feel unloved; are constantly criticized, mocked, or rejected; or are the victims of sexual abuse , we prefer to blame ourselves rather than our parents. The conscious acknowledgment of our parents’ incompetency or cruelty is simply too devastating. Psychologically, it feels much safer for us to turn the criticism inward rather than outward and to blame ourselves for the misfortunes we suffer.

In their wise and wonderful book Quotes to Live By (2022), the philosopher collective of the School of Life puts it this way:

A categorical fact of psychological life is the disinclination of any child to think that there is something wrong with its parents, even when there very much is; it will go to almost any lengths to prevent the idea emerging that its parents may be mentally unwell or fundamentally brutish.…It prefers to hate itself rather than get angry with those who have let it down.

The authors also put their finger on what that means in more concrete terms: As children, we replace righteous anger with shame . For anger simply feels too dangerous an option:

Small children naturally turn injury done to them into dislike of themselves. They ask not so much, ‘Why does my parent fail to care for me?’ as, ‘How might I have failed this admirable person?’ They hate themselves rather than doubting those who should be protecting them; shame replaces anger. It feels, on balance, like the safer option.

Whilst the strategy to blame and dislike ourselves might be a sad but sensible survival mechanism in childhood, it does, of course, turn into a truly debilitating handicap in adulthood. When we are grown up, at last able to fend for and take care of ourselves and to select partners and friends who are loving and kind, our self-hatred no longer serves us. But, by then, it has become habitual. It is the devil we know. We continue to explain our ancient shame about not having been loved enough with the narrative that we are not loveable, that there is something wrong with us at our core, that we are, fundamentally, bad people.

In addition, when we suffer from self-hating thoughts, we often tend to layer another layer of pain on the original pain—a process that, in acceptance and commitment therapy , is called "dirty pain." We hate ourselves for hating ourselves. We feel ashamed for feeling shame. We simply cannot understand why we have such a distorted and unhealthy relationship to ourselves, why we cannot be confident and happy like other people.

When we finally seek therapy to work on these dysfunctional patterns of thinking and feeling, many of us touch base with that repressed anger. We may feel very bitter about our parents and the ways in which they have failed us for a while. Sometimes, we may remain stuck in the anger phase for a very long time.

From Anger to Sadness

And yet anger, too, is merely a developmental stage in the healing process. While it is deeply necessary to dwell in the land of rage for a while, it is not desirable to become a permanent denizen. Anger is energizing, and a driver, and it can be tempting to hold onto it. But only when we are finally ready to let it go do we arrive at the core emotion : sadness. Allowing ourselves to feel our own sadness about what has happened to us can be powerfully healing. Sadness is honest, real, and clean pain.

essay for someone you hate

Once we are able to allow ourselves to be sad, we are beginning to feel again. For self-hatred, and that is another important point, is largely a cognitive phenomenon—thoughts, evaluations, judgments. These are also, in addition to being a dysfunctional habit, a defence against feeling—and especially against feeling our sadness.

Acceptance and Self-Compassion

Yet, beyond sadness, finally, lies what we truly strive for, the reward for our cognitive and emotional understanding of what has happened to us: acceptance and self-compassion.

We may, then, describe the stages of self-hatred and how to overcome it as follows:

  • Emotional and/or physical injury inflicted by our caregivers in childhood
  • The conversion of rightful anger into shame as a measure of self-protection
  • The normalization of narratives of unworthiness and unlovability
  • The discovery of the origins of our negative core beliefs and self-stories (often in therapy)
  • A period of anger
  • A period of sadness
  • True understanding, acceptance, and self-compassion.

This is only the theory, of course. In practice, our developmental and healing processes are never that neat and linear. And nor can we demarcate the various stages quite so tidily. They are all interrelated and may often overlap with one another. We may also vacillate wildly between the different phases, making great progress one day and feeling like we are back to square one the next. We may dance or zigzag back and forth between those stages. Nobody, moreover, is able to feel acceptance and practice self-compassion all the time—we all have bad days or may be thrown off our path temporarily by life’s many curve balls.

But what I want to say is this: Wherever you may be on this journey from self-hatred to self-compassion, know that change is possible. As difficult and painful as the process may be, the rewards are more than worth the effort. Imagine what your life would feel like if you were able to let go of your hateful self-talk most of the time and to replace it with a compassionate and wise inner voice . Imagine the peace that would reign in your inner empire, and what you would be able to do without your self-destructive inner noise. How differently you could show up in your life. Hold on to that vision, and simply continue to take one step at a time.

Anna Katharina Schaffner Ph.D.

Anna Katharina Schaffner, Ph.D. is a burnout and executive coach and the author of Exhausted: An A-Z for the Weary .

  • Find a Therapist
  • Find a Treatment Center
  • Find a Psychiatrist
  • Find a Support Group
  • Find Teletherapy
  • United States
  • Brooklyn, NY
  • Chicago, IL
  • Houston, TX
  • Los Angeles, CA
  • New York, NY
  • Portland, OR
  • San Diego, CA
  • San Francisco, CA
  • Seattle, WA
  • Washington, DC
  • Asperger's
  • Bipolar Disorder
  • Chronic Pain
  • Eating Disorders
  • Passive Aggression
  • Personality
  • Goal Setting
  • Positive Psychology
  • Stopping Smoking
  • Low Sexual Desire
  • Relationships
  • Child Development
  • Therapy Center NEW
  • Diagnosis Dictionary
  • Types of Therapy

March 2024 magazine cover

Understanding what emotional intelligence looks like and the steps needed to improve it could light a path to a more emotionally adept world.

  • Coronavirus Disease 2019
  • Affective Forecasting
  • Neuroscience

Home — Essay Samples — Life — Emotions & Feelings — Hate

one px

Hate Essays

Choosing a topic.

For an argumentative essay on hate, you might consider topics like the impact of hate speech on society, the role of hate in fueling discrimination, or the effectiveness of hate crime legislation.

If you're writing a cause and effect essay , you could explore topics such as the roots of hate, the consequences of hate on mental health, or the connection between hate and violence.

For an opinion essay , you might want to delve into topics like the importance of addressing hate in our communities, the role of hate in shaping personal identity, or the impact of hate on relationships.

Finally, if you're working on an informative essay , you could consider topics such as the psychology of hate, the history of hate groups, or the cultural manifestations of hate.

  • Hate speech should be regulated to protect marginalized communities.
  • The media plays a significant role in perpetuating hate and prejudice.
  • Understanding the psychological roots of hate can lead to more effective interventions.
  • Hate is a complex and pervasive emotion that has the power to shape our thoughts, actions, and relationships.
  • In today's society, hate seems to be on the rise, fueling divisions and conflicts across communities.
  • As a deeply ingrained emotion, hate has the ability to influence our perceptions and behaviors in profound ways.
  • The impact of hate on society is undeniable, and it's crucial that we continue to address this issue through education, legislation, and community action.
  • Hate is a destructive force that has the power to tear communities apart, but by understanding its origins and effects, we can work towards a more inclusive and compassionate society.
  • As we navigate the complexities of hate, it's clear that the path to healing and understanding requires a collective effort to confront and dismantle the roots of prejudice and discrimination.

Now that you have some ideas to get started, it's time to dive into your essay on hate and explore the many facets of this powerful emotion.

Hate: a Word Surrounded by Controversy 

For what reason do i hate myself , made-to-order essay as fast as you need it.

Each essay is customized to cater to your unique preferences

+ experts online

Mass Resistance: Formation of Hate Groups and Their Impact on Society

The extreme effects of love and hate in romeo and juliet, a play by william shakespeare, hate speech should not be tolerated inside school campus, hate speech and the need to restrict it, let us write you an essay from scratch.

  • 450+ experts on 30 subjects ready to help
  • Custom essay delivered in as few as 3 hours

A Jesuit Response to The Prevailing Climate of Divisiveness, Hate and Intolerance

How the hate in george orwell’s book 1984 mirrors the hate in modern america, relevant topics.

  • Forgiveness

By clicking “Check Writers’ Offers”, you agree to our terms of service and privacy policy . We’ll occasionally send you promo and account related email

No need to pay just yet!

We use cookies to personalyze your web-site experience. By continuing we’ll assume you board with our cookie policy .

  • Instructions Followed To The Letter
  • Deadlines Met At Every Stage
  • Unique And Plagiarism Free

essay for someone you hate

KathySteinemann.com: Free Resources for Writers and Poets

Word lists, cheat sheets, and sometimes irreverent reviews of writing rules. kathy steinemann is the author of the writer's lexicon series..

essay for someone you hate

More Than 200 Ways to Say “Hate”: A Word List for Writers

Hate Words

When I recently asked fellow writers for their repetitive-word nemeses , I was surprised to find hate on the list. However, a Google search for hate produces billions of results.

Orson Welles expressed an opinion about hate: “I hate television. I hate it as much as peanuts. But I can’t stop eating peanuts.”

And then there’s the perspective of Steve Martin: “I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.”

Witty observations. But if your WIP seems anything but witty because it’s overrun by hate , read on for ways to squelch it.

See also [ bad ] [ because ] [ just ] [ that ] [ very ]

Emotion Beats and Physical Manifestations

If you have room in your WIP, try showing instead of telling by revealing characters’ hate with emotional responses.

  • avoiding eye contact
  • baring one’s teeth
  • orienting feet and torso away from the object of one’s hate
  • clenching one’s jaw
  • compressing one’s lips
  • touching one’s nose
  • crossing one’s arms and/or legs
  • repeatedly checking one’s watch or phone
  • flaring one’s nostrils
  • forcing a smile or laugh
  • forcing eye contact
  • increasing one’s physical distance
  • ignoring the object of one’s hate
  • leaning away
  • poking tongue into one’s cheek
  • making fists of one’s hands
  • touching the hollow at the base of one’s neck
  • pressing one’s lips together
  • narrowing one’s eyes
  • folding one’s arms
  • tensing one’s forearm muscles
  • going red in the face
  • refusing to shake hands or to hug another character (could also be a side effect of germophobia or safety measures)
  • constricting pupils — an involuntary response that would require close quarters for a character to notice.

For more options, consult a body language dictionary . (As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.)

Other Ways to Show Hate

Scrutinize the following paragraphs. Do you recognize the dislike or hate in each one?

Stephanie, who was the only server on the diner’s early shift, spit in Donald’s coffee every time she prepared it. He never seemed to notice, so today she upped the ante and poured his café au lait into a dirty mug previously used by a sniffling customer with a cough. Wouldn’t it be karma for Donald if the runny-nosed customer had something serious?

Walter picked up the cat by the scruff of the neck and held it as far from his body as his short arms could reach. He couldn’t bring himself to wring its neck, but he could certainly throw it outside with the rest of its mangy kin.

The wallpaper in the living room reeked of cigarette smoke and mold. And the carpet — who in their right mind would ever install a wall-to-wall leopard-print shag? To say nothing of the gaudy family room and rusty plumbing. Really? Time to switch realtors.

Conversation often provides the most direct route to convey character emotion:

“How many times have I asked you not to play country-and-western music while I’m driving? Turn it off. Now!”

“Look, miss, I asked for the pasta without mushrooms. Take it back to the kitchen.”

“Why did we have to move to Alaska? It’s too freakin’ cold. Why couldn’t you find a job in California or Arizona?”

“A date with that loser? You gotta be kidding. He gives me the creeps.”

Instead of hateful consider these adjectives. Exercise caution with multiple descriptors, though. Stacked modifiers exasperate readers.

A to M abhorrent, abominable, abysmal, appalling, atrocious, awful, beastly, contemptible, dastardly, deplorable, despicable, detestable, disgraceful, disgusting, distasteful, dreadful, foul, heinous, hideous, horrendous, horrible, horrid, ignoble, ill-natured, iniquitous, insufferable, intolerable, loathsome, low, malevolent, malicious, malignant, monstrous

N to W nasty, nauseating, obnoxious, odious, offensive, putrid, rancorous, repellant, reprehensible, repugnant, repulsive, revolting, rotten, scandalous, sickening, stomach-turning, terrible, unacceptable, unbearable, unpalatable, unspeakable, venomous, vile, villainous, wicked

Similes and Metaphors

Like overused words, too many similes and metaphors attract attention — and not in a good way. However, an inventive turn of phrase often withstands the test of time to become so popular that future generations label it as cliché.

Maybe you can find seeds in these phrases to create your own innovative expressions that become the clichés of tomorrow.

a furnace burning in one’s craw

a paroxysm coursing through one’s veins

an all-consuming fire

an incipient pathogen

electric animosity

filling one’s throat with bitterness

inescapable as death

like a malignant tumor

malevolence personified

one’s constant companion

poisonous passion

sinister as the snake in the garden of Eden

soul slayer

Red often symbolizes hate. However red also represents a number of other emotions, including the opposite of hate: love.

Rather than rely on the symbolism of color, leverage it to produce conflict. For example, create a protagonist who hates green, and introduce a character who deliberately wears green clothing or paints a room green.

Scents provide another way to add conflict. Try one or more of the following.

B to S body odor, burnt _____, Camembert cheese, chickens, cigarette smoke, coffee, garbage, gardenias, garlic, Gruyere cheese, hay, limburger cheese, meat, Roquefort cheese, roses, stinky socks

Shapes and Symbols

Everyone recognizes the swastika. Unfortunately, extremists and supremacists have created so many hate emblems that I could fill pages with them. Search Google for symbols of hate to see what I mean. If you need a symbol for your writing, choose something familiar or create one that suits your world.

The Versatility of Verbs and Phrasal Verbs

Rather than hate, a character might:

Intense Emotion

A to V abhor, castigate, contemn [dated], despise, detest, harass, intimidate, loathe, reject, scorn, shun, spurn, vilify

Less Intense Emotion

B to S beat down, beat up, belittle, berate, denigrate, deride, disdain, dislike, glare at, grimace, insult, mock, pick apart, rebuke, reproach, sneer at

Hate can range from mild dislike to abject loathing. If you need a replacement noun, consider one of these.

A to V abhorrence, animosity, antipathy, contempt, detestation, disgust, dudgeon, loathing, malevolence, malignance, rancor, revulsion, venom, vitriol

A to R acrimony, animus, antagonism, aversion, bitterness, dislike, disrelish, distaste, enmity, hostility, ill feeling, ill will, malice, odium, repugnance, resentment

Props aren’t only for plays and movies. They add dimension to prose and poetry as well. Could one of these augment your WIP?

B to M boss or supervisor, bully, cat or dog that digs up _____, dating app glitch, divorce lawyer, ex-[boss, boyfriend, girlfriend, landlord, lover, spouse], false rumors, impolite salesclerk, intimidating texts, lost luggage, missing mail or parcel, mother-in-law

N to T neighbor’s car alarm that goes off repeatedly during the night, news anchor, no-contact or restraining order, one-star book review, politician, rapist, rude delivery person, serial killer, social media meme, stepchild, stepparent, tailgater, tattoo(s) of a terrorist group or hate movement, termination of employment

Clichés and Idioms

Sometimes repetitions in a WIP are the result of clichés or idioms such as these. Replace them if appropriate, remembering that dialogue doesn’t always follow the rules.

I hate to break it to you but: I’m sorry but

I hate to eat and run: I have an appointment; I’m running late

love-hate relationship: ambivalence, conflicted feelings

to hate like sin: denounce, eschew, revile, scorn

to hate on someone/something: attack, censure, deprecate, execrate, ridicule

to hate someone’s guts: abhor, despise, detest, loathe

Are You Interested in More Word Lists and Writing Tips?

If you haven’t done so already, please subscribe to my blog . (The link will take you to the subscription widget at the top left of this post.)

I usually post two to five times monthly, and you can discontinue your subscription at any time.

8 thoughts on “ More Than 200 Ways to Say “Hate”: A Word List for Writers ”

Love these helpful word Kathy, and I enjoy your examples too 🙂

Thanks, Debby!

I am now armed and ready!

With an evil grin and a glint in your eye? 😉

Thanks for this, Kathy. On a slightly different topic, I find an overabundance of smiling characters in my work in progress. I don’t know if it is as glaring as it seems, but I was curious if you’d done a blog post about that at some point?

Thanks, Pete. How about these?

https://kathysteinemann.com/Musings/ways-to-say-laughed/ https://kathysteinemann.com/Musings/smiles/

Extremely helpful! Thank you, Kathy.

My pleasure, Pete.

Comments are closed.

10 Successful Harvard Application Essays | 2021

Our new 2022 version is up now.

Our 2022 edition is sponsored by HS2 Academy—a premier college counseling company that has helped thousands of students gain admission into Ivy League-level universities across the world. Learn more at www.hs2academy.com . Also made possible by The Art of Applying, College Confidential, Crimson Education, Dan Lichterman, Key Education, MR. MBA®, Potomac Admissions, Prep Expert, and Prepory.

essay for someone you hate

AcceptU is the #1 rated college admissions consulting group. With a team composed entirely of former college admissions officers, AcceptU advises families on all aspects of the college planning process, from early profile-building to strategy and essay editing. More than 90% of our past students are admitted to at least one of their top three choices and AcceptU clients achieve 4x higher rates of admission to highly selective colleges. Learn more at www.AcceptU.com and schedule an introductory call with an AcceptU advisor today.

Successful Harvard Essay

I had never seen houses floating down a river. Minutes before there had not even been a river. An immense wall of water was destroying everything in its wake, picking up fishing boats to smash them against buildings. It was the morning of March 11, 2011. Seeing the images of destruction wrought by the earthquake and tsunami in Japan, I felt as if something within myself was also being shaken, for I had just spent two of the happiest summers of my life there.

In the summer of my freshman year, I received the Kikkoman National Scholarship, which allowed me to travel to Japan to stay with a host family in Tokyo for ten weeks. I arrived just as the swine flu panic gripped the world, so I was not allowed to attend high school with my host brother, Yamato. Instead, I took Japanese language, judo, and karate classes and explored the confusing sprawl of the largest city in the world. I spent time with the old men of my neighborhood in the onsen, or hot spring, questioning them about the Japan of their youth. They laughed and told me that if I wanted to see for myself, I should work on a farm.

The next summer I returned to Japan, deciding to heed the old men’s advice and volunteer on a farm in Japan’s northernmost island, Hokkaido. I spent two weeks working more than fourteen hours a day. I held thirty-pound bags of garlic with one hand while trying to tie them to a rope hanging from the ceiling with the other, but couldn’t hold the bags in the air long enough. Other days were spent pulling up endless rows of daikon, or Japanese radish, which left rashes on my arms that itched for weeks. Completely exhausted, I stumbled back to the farmhouse, only to be greeted by the family’s young children who were eager to play. I passed out every night in a room too small for me to straighten my legs. One day, I overslept a lunch break by two hours. I awoke mortified, and hurried to the father. After I apologized in the most polite form of Japanese, his face broke into a broad grin. He patted me on the back and said, “You are a good worker, Anthony. There is no need to apologize.” This single exchange revealed the true spirit of the Japanese farmer. The family had lived for years in conditions that thoroughly wore me out in only a few days. I had missed two hours of work, yet they were still perpetually thankful to me. In their life of unbelievable hardship, they still found room for compassion.

In their life of unbelievable hardship, they still found room for compassion.

When I had first gone to Tokyo, I had sought the soul of the nation among its skyscrapers and urban hot springs. The next summer I spurned the beaten track in an attempt to discover the true spirit of Japan. While lugging enormously heavy bags of garlic and picking daikon, I found that spirit. The farmers worked harder than anyone I have ever met, but they still made room in their hearts for me. So when the tsunami threatened the people to whom I owed so much, I had to act. Remembering the lesson of compassion I learned from the farm family, I started a fund-raiser in my community called “One Thousand Cranes for Japan.” Little more than two weeks later, we had raised over $8,000 and a flock of one thousand cranes was on its way to Japan.

essay for someone you hate

Professional Review by AcceptU

This essay is very clean and straightforward. Anthony wisely uses imagery from a well-known historic event, the 2011 tsunami, to set the scene for his story. He visited Japan for two summers and provides depth about what he learned: In his first summer, he explored Tokyo and studied the language and culture; in his second summer, he lived in rural Japan and worked long hours on a farm.

We like to see how applicants learn, grow or change from the beginning to the end - and Anthony rightfully spends more time describing the hard work and lifestyle of farming and what he learned from this experience.

The beauty of the essay actually lies in its simplicity. Admittedly, it is not a groundbreaking or original essay in the way he tells his story; instead, Anthony comes across as someone who is very interesting, hardworking, intellectually curious, dedicated, humble and likable - all traits that admissions officers are seeking in applicants.

We like to see how applicants learn, grow or change from the beginning to the end - and Anthony rightfully spends more time describing the hard work and lifestyle of farming and what he learned from this experience. Anthony concludes with a reference to his opening paragraph about the tsunami, and impresses the reader with his fundraising to help victims.

It is not necessarily missing, but perhaps a sentence or two could have been added to explain why Anthony was in Japan in the first place. What was his connection to the country, language or culture? Does it tie into an academic interest? If so, that would make his already strong essay even stronger in the eyes of admissions officers.

acceptu_button

Sponsored by Bridge to College, a data company that matches students to colleges that are an academic, financial, and social fit. We provide services to students, families, high schools, and colleges to support all of their admissions needs. Visit https://bit.ly/bridge-to-college-successful-essays for more information on the new platform, sign up for updates and consultations, and learn more about what we do.

Find Bridge to College on Social Media: Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | LinkedIn

I entered the surprisingly cool car. Since when is Beijing Line 13 air-conditioned? I’ll take it. At four o’clock in the afternoon only about twenty people were in the subway car. “At least it’s not crowded,” one might have thought. Wrong. The pressure of their eyes on me filled the car and smothered me. “看看!她是外国人!”(Look, look! She’s a foreigner!) An old man very loudly whispered to a child curled up in his lap. “Foreigner,” he called me. I hate that word, “foreigner.” It only explains my exterior. If only they could look inside.…

I want to keep reading because there is something she is saying about her identity--be it performative or actual--that I am curious about.

They would know that I actually speak Chinese—not just speak, but love. They would know that this love was born from my first love of Latin—the language that fostered my admiration of all languages. Latin lives in the words we speak around the world today. And translating this ancient language is like watching a play and performing in it at the same time. Each word is an adventure, and on the journey through Virgil’s Aeneid I found that I am more like Aeneas than any living, dead, or fictional hero I know. We share the intrinsic value of loyalty to friends, family, and society. We stand true to our own word, and we uphold others to theirs. Like Aeneas’s trek to find a new settlement for his collapsed Troy, with similar perseverance I, too, wander the seas for my own place in the world. Language has helped me do that.

If these subway passengers understood me, they would know that the very reason I sat beside them was because of Latin. Even before Aeneas and his tale, I met Caecilius and Grumio, characters in my first Latin textbook. In translations I learned grammar alongside Rome’s rich history. I realized how learning another language could expose me to other worlds and other people—something that has always excited me. I also realized that if I wanted to know more about the world and the people in it, I would have to learn a spoken language. Spanish, despite the seven years of study prior to Latin, did not stick with me. And the throatiness of French was not appealing. But Chinese, more than these other traditional languages, intrigued me. The doors to new worlds it could open seemed endless. Thus I chose Chinese.

If these subway passengers looked inside me, they would find that my knowledge of both Latin and Chinese makes me feel whole. It feels like the world of the past is flowing through me alongside the world of the future. Thanks to Latin, Chinese sticks in my mind like the Velcro on the little boy’s shoes in front of me. If this little boy and his family and friends could look inside, they would understand that Latin laid the foundation for my lifelong commitment to languages. Without words, thoughts and actions would be lost in the space between our ears. To them, I am a foreigner, “外国人” literally translated as “out-of-country person.” I feel, however, more like an advena, the Latin word for “foreigner,” translated as “(one who) comes to (this place).” I came to this place, and I came to this country to stay. Unfortunately, they will not know this until I speak. Then once I speak, the doors will open.

essay for someone you hate

Professional Review by Bridge to College

Your college essay should serve two purposes: allow the reader to gain insights about you that they are not able to do in other parts of your application and provide an example of your writing abilities. To the former, you are hoping to demonstrate five soft skills that most colleges are at least implicitly interested in gleaning, those that indicate your capacity to be a good student at their institution.

Alex arrives at both goals in an interesting way. Without seeing the rest of her application, I can only assume that she is possibly interested in pursuing a major in a language (if she is pursuing a major in an applied math, this essay would be extremely interesting) and she has likely participated in some kind of team sport to demonstrate the soft skill of teamwork. To be honest, as someone who speaks five languages myself and studied Latin in undergrad, I don’t necessarily agree with her assessment of the languages. BUT I’m interested. I want to keep reading. She isn’t supposed to get everything right in this essay; she’s supposed to demonstrate a capacity for learning. And she does that.

I want to keep reading because there is something she is saying about her identity--be it performative or actual--that I am curious about. With our work in college access and admissions, we’ve only worked in underserved communities, be they students of color or girls interested in STEM or first-generation college students or more. People make an assumption that we are exploiting these identities into sob stories that admissions readers will immediately hang on to. We’re not doing that. We are encouraging students to write about something similar to what Alex did—describe how your identity has created a learning opportunity or a moment of resilience or determination. Alex seems like someone who is well resourced: her access to certain text; language curricula and the amount of time she spent studying those languages; even her sentence structure, gives that away. But her openness to adapt with humility is a critical skill that is so necessary to be a great student, and unfortunately a skill that many students miss.

For the second goal, she does a tremendous job of demonstrating her writing abilities. Her sentence structures are varied and there aren’t egregious mistakes in grammar and spelling. The last two sentences of the second paragraph sold me on her skill-level and personhood. I also really appreciated that she wasn’t shying away from what she has been able to access as far as her schooling. Alex is smart, witty, and well-traveled, and you’re going to know it. I love that.

The essay works as an introduction to who she is and her soft skills, as well as a demonstration of her writing abilities.

CEO and Founder of Bridge to College

bridge to college button

Elite Educational Institute has been helping students reach their academic goals through test preparation, tutoring, and college consulting services since 1987. Learn more at www.eliteprep.com .

When I was a child, I begged my parents for my very own Brother PT-1400 P-Touch Handheld Label Maker to fulfill all of my labeling needs. Other kids had Nintendos and would spend their free time with Mario and Luigi. While they pummeled their video game controllers furiously, the pads of their thumbs dancing across their joysticks, I would type out labels on my industrial-standard P-Touch with just as much zeal. I labeled everything imaginable, dividing hundreds of pens into Ziploc bags by color, then rubber-banding them by point size. The finishing touch, of course, was always a glossy, three-eighths-inch-wide tag, freshly churned out from my handheld labeler and decisively pasted upon the numerous plastic bags I had successfully compiled.

Labeling became therapeutic for me; organizing my surroundings into specific groups to be labeled provides me with a sense of stability. I may not physically need the shiny color-coded label verifying the contents of a plastic bag as BLUE HIGHLIGHTERS—FAT, to identify them as such, but seeing these classifications so plainly allows me to appreciate the reliability of my categorizations. There are no exceptions when I label the top ledge of my bookshelf as containing works from ACHEBE, CHINUA TO CONRAD, JOSEPH. Each book is either filtered into that category or placed definitively into another one. Yet, such consistency only exists in these inanimate objects.

Thus, the break in my role as a labeler comes when I interact with people. Their lives are too complicated, their personalities too intricate for me to resolutely summarize in a few words or even with the 26.2 feet of laminated adhesive tape compatible with my label maker. I have learned that a thin line exists between labeling and just being judgmental when evaluating individuals. I can hardly superficially characterize others as simply as I do my material possessions because people refuse to be so cleanly separated and compartmentalized. My sister Joyce jokes freely and talks with me for hours about everything from the disturbing popularity of vampires in pop culture to cubic watermelons, yet those who don’t know her well usually think of her as timid and introverted. My mother is sometimes my biggest supporter, spouting words of encouragement and, at other instances, my most unrelenting critic. The overlap becomes too indistinct, the contradictions too apparent, even as I attempt to classify those people in the world whom I know best.

For all my love of order when it comes to my room, I don't want myself, or the people with whom I interact, to fit squarely into any one category.

Neither would I want others to be predictable enough for me to label. The real joy in human interaction lies in the excitement of the unknown. Overturning expectations can be necessary to preserving the vitality of relationships. If I were never surprised by the behaviors of those around me, my biggest source of entertainment would vanish. For all my love of order when it comes to my room, I don’t want myself, or the people with whom I interact, to fit squarely into any one category. I meticulously follow directions to the millimeter in the chemistry lab but measure ingredients by pinches and dashes in the comfort of my kitchen. I’m a self-proclaimed grammar Nazi, but I’ll admit e. e. cummings’s irreverence does appeal. I’ll chart my television show schedule on Excel, but I would never dream of confronting my chores with as much organization. I even call myself a labeler, but not when it comes to people. As Walt Whitman might put it, “Do I contradict myself? / Very well, then I contradict myself, / (I am large, I contain multitudes.).”

I therefore refrain from the temptation to label—despite it being an act that makes me feel so fulfilled when applied to physical objects—when real people are the subjects. The consequences of premature labeling are too great, the risk of inaccuracy too high because, most of the time, not even the hundreds of alphanumeric digits and symbols available for entry on my P-Touch can effectively describe who an individual really is.

essay for someone you hate

Professional Review by Elite Prep

Amusing yet insightful, perhaps the most outstanding quality of Justine’s personal statement lies in the balance she strikes between anecdotal flourish and honest introspection. By integrating occasional humour and witty commentary into an otherwise lyrical and earnest self-reflection, Justine masterfully conveys an unfettered, sincere wisdom and maturity coveted by prestigious universities.

Justine breaks the ice by recalling a moment in her childhood that captures her fervent passion for labelling. When applying to selective academic institutions, idiosyncrasies and peculiar personal habits, however trivial, are always appreciated as indicators of individuality. Justine veers safely away from the temptation of “playing it safe” by exploring her dedication towards organizing all her possessions, a dedication that has followed her into adolescence.

She also writes from a place of raw honesty and emotion by offering the rationale behind her bizarre passion. Justine's reliance on labelling is underpinned by her yearning for a sense of stability and order in a messy world—an unaffected yearning that readers, to varying degrees, can sympathize with.

She also writes from a place of raw honesty and emotion by offering the rationale behind her bizarre passion. Justine’s reliance on labelling is underpinned by her yearning for a sense of stability and order in a messy world—an unaffected yearning that readers, to varying degrees, can sympathize with. She recognizes, however, it would be imprudent to navigate all facets of life with an unfaltering drive to compartmentalize everything and everyone she encounters.

In doing so, Justine seamlessly transitions to the latter, more pensive half of her personal statement. She extracts several insights by analyzing how, in staunch contrast with her neatly-organized pencil cases, the world is confusing, and rife with contradictions. Within each individual lies yet another world of complexity—as Justine reflects, people can’t be boiled down into “a few words,” and it’s impossible to capture their character, “even with the 26.2 feet of laminated adhesive tape compatible with [her] label maker.”

In concluding, Justine returns back to the premise that started it all, reminding the reader of her take on why compartmentalizing the world would be an ultimately unproductive effort. The most magical part of Justine’s personal statement? It reads easily, flows with imagery, and employs a simple concept—her labelling practices—to introduce a larger, thoughtful conversation.

essay for someone you hate

The best compliment I ever received was from my little brother: “My science teacher’s unbelievably good at telling stories,” he announced. “Nearly as good as you.” I thought about that, how I savor a good story the way some people savor last-minute touchdowns.

I learned in biology that I’m composed of 7 × 10 27 atoms, but that number didn’t mean anything to me until I read Bill Bryson’s A Short History of Nearly Everything. One sentence stayed with me for weeks: “Every atom you possess has almost certainly passed through several stars and been part of millions of organisms on its way to becoming you.” It estimates that each human has about 2 billion atoms of Shakespeare hanging around inside—quite a comfort, as I try to write this essay. I thought about every one of my atoms, wondering where they had been and what miracles they had witnessed.

My physical body is a string of atoms, but what of my inner self, my soul, my essence? I've come to the realization that my life has been a string as well, a string of stories.

My physical body is a string of atoms, but what of my inner self, my soul, my essence? I’ve come to the realization that my life has been a string as well, a string of stories. Every one of us is made of star stuff, forged through fires, and emerging as nicked as the surface of the moon. It frustrated me no end that I couldn’t sit down with all the people I met, interrogating them about their lives, identifying every last story that made them who they are.

I remember how magical it was the first time I read a fiction book: Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone. I was duly impressed with Quidditch and the Invisibility Cloak, of course, but I was absolutely spellbound by how much I could learn about Harry. The kippers he had for breakfast, the supplies he bought for Potions—the details everyone skimmed over were remarkable to me. Fiction was a revelation. Here, at last, was a window into another person’s string of stories!

Over the years, I’ve thought long and hard about that immortal question: What superpower would you choose? I considered the usual suspects—invisibility, superhuman strength, flying—but threw them out immediately. My superhero alter ego would be Story Girl. She wouldn’t run marathons, but she could walk for miles and miles in other people’s shoes. She’d know that all it takes for empathy and understanding is the right story.

Imagine my astonishment when I discovered Radiolab on NPR. Here was my imaginary superpower, embodied in real life! I had been struggling with AP Biology, seeing it as a class full of complicated processes and alien vocabulary. That changed radically when I listened, enthralled, as Radiolab traced the effects of dopamine on love and gambling. This was science, sure, but it was science as I’d never heard it before. It contained conflict and emotion and a narrative; it made me anxious to learn more. It wasn’t that I was obtuse for biology; I just hadn’t found the stories in it before.

I’m convinced that you can learn anything in the form of a story. The layperson often writes off concepts—entropy, the Maginot Line, anapestic meter—as too foreign to comprehend. But with the right framing, the world suddenly becomes an open book, enticing and ripe for exploration. I want to become a writer to find those stories, much like Jad Abumrad and Robert Krulwich from Radiolab, making intimidating subjects become familiar and inviting for everyone. I want to become Story Girl.

By combining her previous interest with her newfound love for biology, Carrie is able to highlight how her past experiences have assisted her in overcoming novel challenges. This portrays her as a resilient and resourceful problem-solver: traits that colleges value heavily in their students.

Carrie begins her essay with a fondly-remembered compliment from her brother, introducing her most passionate endeavor: storytelling. By recalling anecdotes related to her love of stories, she establishes herself as a deeply inquisitive and creative person; someone whose greatest virtue is their unfettered thirst for knowledge. Curiosity is greatly prized by colleges, and Carrie’s inclusion of this particular value encourages admissions officers to keep reading.

Going on to explore the intersections between stories and science, Carrie reveals her past difficulties with AP biology; that is, until she learnt about the amazing stories hidden within the subject. By combining her previous interest with her newfound love for biology, Carrie is able to highlight how her past experiences have assisted her in overcoming novel challenges. This portrays her as a resilient and resourceful problem-solver: traits that colleges value heavily in their students.

Carrie ends her essay with her belief that through stories, everything is possible. She expounds on her future ambitions in regards to storytelling, as well as her desire to make learning both fun and accessible to everyone via the power of stories. By comparing her goals to that of a superhero, Carrie is able to emphasise her enthusiasm for contributing to social change. Most importantly, Carrie’s ambitions show how she can contribute to the Harvard community positively, making her a strong applicant.

Dan Lichterman

As an admission essay specialist , Dan Lichterman has been empowering students to find their voice since 2004. He helps students stand out on paper, eliminating the unnecessary so the necessary may speak. Drawing upon his storytelling background, Dan guides applicants to craft authentic essays that leap off the page. He is available for online writing support within the US and internationally. To learn more and schedule a brief complimentary consultation visit danlichterman.com.

I have a fetish for writing.

I’m not talking about crafting prose or verses, or even sentences out of words. But simply constructing letters and characters from strokes of ink gives me immense satisfaction. It’s not quite calligraphy, as I don’t use calligraphic pens or Chinese writing brushes; I prefer it simple, spontaneous, and subconscious. I often find myself crafting characters in the margins of notebooks with a fifty-cent pencil, or tracing letters out of thin air with anything from chopsticks to fingertips.

"One's handwriting," said the ancient Chinese, "is a painting of one's mind." After all, when I practice my handwriting, I am crafting characters. My character.

The art of handwriting is a relic in the information era. Why write when one can type? Perhaps the Chinese had an answer before the advent of keyboards. “One’s handwriting,” said the ancient Chinese, “is a painting of one’s mind.” After all, when I practice my handwriting, I am crafting characters.

My character.

I particularly enjoy meticulously designing a character, stroke by stroke, and eventually building up, letter by letter, to a quote person­alized in my own voice. Every movement of the pen and every drop­let of ink all lead to something profound, as if the arches of every "m" are doorways to revelations. After all, characters are the build­ing blocks of language, and language is the only vehicle through which knowledge unfolds. Thus, in a way, these letters under my pen are themselves representations of knowledge, and the delicate beauty of every letter proves, visually, the intrinsic beauty of know­ing. I suppose handwriting reminds me of my conviction in this vi­sual manner: through learning answers are found, lives enriched, and societies bettered.

Moreover, perhaps this strange passion in polishing every single character of a word delineates my dedication to learning, testifies my zeal for my conviction, and sketches a crucial stroke of my character.

"We--must--know ... " the mathematician David Hilbert's voice echoes in resolute cursive at the tip of my pen, as he, addressing German scientists in 1930, propounds the goal of modern intellectu­als. My pen firmly nods in agreement with Hilbert, while my mind again fumbles for the path to knowledge.

The versatility of handwriting enthralls me. The Chinese devel­oped many styles -- called hands -- of writing. Fittingly, each hand seems to parallel one of my many academic interests. Characters of the Regular Hand (kai shu), a legible script, serve me well during many long hours when I scratch my head and try to prove a mathematical statement rigorously, as the legibility illuminates my logic on paper. Words of the Running Hand (xing shu), a semi-cursive script, are like the passionate words that I speak before a committee of Model United Nations delegates, propounding a decisive course of action: the words, both spoken and written, are swift and coherent but resolute and emphatic. And strokes of the Cursive Hand (cao shu) resemble those sudden artistic sparks when I deliver a line on stage: free spontaneous, but emphatic syllables travel through the lights like rivers of ink flowing on the page.

Yet the fact that the three distinctive hands cooperate so seamlessly, fusing together the glorious culture of writing, is perhaps a fable of learning, a testament that the many talents of the Renaissance Man could all be worthwhile for enriching human society. Such is my methodology: just like I organize my different hands into a neat personal style with my fetish for writing, I can unify my broad interests with my passion for learning.

“...We -- will -- know!” Hilbert finishes his adage, as I frantically slice an exclamation mark as the final stroke of this painting of my mind.

I must know: for knowing, like well-crafted letters, has an inherent beauty and an intrinsic value. I will know: for my versatile interests in academics will flow like my versatile styles of writing.

I must know and I will know: for my fetish for writing is a fetish for learning.

essay for someone you hate

Professional Review by Dan Lichterman

We learn that he expresses his innermost self through an art that has become a relic within the information age. As we peer into his mind, we learn something essential about Jiafeng's character–that he is irrepressibly drawn to the intricate beauty of pure learning.

Jiafeng’s essay succeeds by using the metaphor of handwriting, and it’s immense physical satisfaction, to showcase the unbounded pleasure of pursuing knowledge. We can visualize spontaneously crafted letters filling his notebooks. We see him trace Chinese characters into air by chopstick and fingertip. We learn that he expresses his innermost self through an art that has become a relic within the information age. As we peer into his mind, we learn something essential about Jiafeng’s character–that he is irrepressibly drawn to the intricate beauty of pure learning.

Jiafeng goes on to reveal that his intellectual pursuit has been shaped by not one but three Chinese styles of handwriting, each reflecting a distinct element of his intellectual growth. We see Jiafeng’s logic when engaged in mathematical proof, rhetorical flair when speaking before Model United Nations, and improvisational spark when delivering lines on stage. He presents these polymath pursuits as united by writing, indicating to readers that his broad interests are all an expression of the same principle of discovery. By the time readers finish Jiafeng’s essay they have no doubts regarding the pleasure he derives from learning–they have experienced him enacting this celebration of thought throughout every line of this well-crafted personal statement.

Dan Lichterman Button

Crimson Education is the world’s most successful US/UK university admissions consultancy. A member of the NACAC and the IACAC, the company counts US News & World Report and Times Higher Education as its partners. Crimson's students work with expert tutors and mentors to gain admission to the Ivy League, Stanford, MIT, Caltech, Duke — as well as Oxford, Cambridge and other world leading institutions in the UK — at 4x the general applicant rate. Crimson’s unique model of support sees students work one-on-one with Ivy League and other top school graduates on every aspect of their application, from their academics to their extracurriculars, personal statements and supplemental essays. The company is led by co-founder and CEO Jamie Beaton, who at only 26, has completed an undergraduate dual degree at Harvard, an MBA at Stanford, is an Oxford Rhodes Scholar. In February 2022, Jamie will release his first book: “ACCEPTED! Secrets to Gaining Admission To The World's Top Universities.

“Ella, what did you think of Douglass’s view on Christianity?” I gulped. Increasingly powerful palpitations throbbed in my heart as my eyes darted around the classroom – searching for a profound response to Dr. Franklin’s question. I took a deep breath while reaching the most genuine answer I could conjure.

“Professor, I don’t know.”

Dr. Franklin stared at me blankly as he attempted to interpret the thoughts I didn’t voice. My lack of familiarity with the assigned text wasn’t a consideration that crossed his mind because he was familiar with my past contributions to class discussions. I was a fervent critic of the corrupted culture behind Christianity of the Puritans in Hawthorne’s “Young Goodman Brown” and modern evangelicals involved in the puzzling divinity of Donald Trump. He arched his flummoxed brows as he began to open his mouth.

“Professor, what I mean is that I’m not sure whether or not I even have a say on Douglass’s statements on Christianity in his Narrative of the Life.”

In class, I often separated the culture of Christianity from the religion. To tie these immensely disparate concepts as one and coin it as Christianity would present fallacies that contradict with the Christianity I knew. Lack of tolerance and hostility were products of humans’ sinful nature – not the teachings of Christ. People were just using Christianity as an excuse to exalt themselves rather than the holy name of Jesus. These were the “facts.”

My greatest realization came when Douglass declared Christian slave-holders as the worst slave-holders he ever met because of their deceptive feign of piety and use of Christianity to justify the oppression of their slaves. I realized that I couldn’t bring myself to raise the same argument that I used to convince myself that my Christianity of love was the only true Christianity. To Douglass, Christianity was the opposite. I didn’t want to dismiss his story. People use this sacred religion to spread hatred, and to many, this is the only Christianity they know. Their experiences aren’t any bit falser than mine.

Christianity isn’t the only culture that harbors truth that transcends the “facts.” America’s less of a perfect amalgamation of different ethnic cultures and more of a society severed by tribal conflicts rooted in the long established political culture of the nation. Issues such as racism, white privilege, and gender disparity are highly salient topics of current political discussion. However, during a time when people can use online platforms with algorithms that provide content they want to see, we fail to acknowledge the truth in other people’s experiences and express empathy.

My protective nature drives my desire to connect with different people and build understanding. To do so, however, I step outside my Korean American Southern Baptist paradigm because my experiences do not constitute everyone else's.

As a Korean-American in the South, I am no stranger to intolerance. I remember the countless instances of people mocking my parents for their English pronunciation and my brother’s stutter. Because their words were less eloquent, people deemed their thoughts as less valuable as well. I protect my family and translate their words whenever they have a doctor’s appointment or need more ketchup at McDonald’s. My protective nature drives my desire to connect with different people and build understanding. To do so, however, I step outside my Korean American Southern Baptist paradigm because my experiences do not constitute everyone else’s.

Excluded from the Manichaean narrative of this country, I observe the turmoil in our nation through a separate lens - a blessing and a curse. Not only do I find myself awkwardly fixed in a black vs. white America, but I also fail to define my identity sandwiched between Korean and American. In the end, I find myself stuck amongst the conventional labels and binaries that divide America.

“You seem to work harder than most to understand other people’s points of view,” Dr. Franklin said after I shared these thoughts to the class.

“I find this easier because I spent my childhood assuming that my culture was always the exception,” I replied. As an anomaly, accepting different truths is second nature.

essay for someone you hate

Professional Review by Crimson Education

At a time in which the Black Lives Matters movement was sweeping America and racial tension was at a high, Ella was able to offer a powerful and brave perspective: how she feels to be neither Black nor White. The true strength of this essay is its willingness to go where people rarely go in college essays: to race, to politics and to religion.

This is a trait that exists in a powerful independent thinker who could push all kinds of debates forwards - academic ones or otherwise.

Her dedication to her religion is evident - but so is her willingness to question the manipulation of the word ‘Christianty’ for less than genuine purposes. It requires intellectual bravery to ask the hard questions of your own religion as opposed to succumbing to cognitive dissonance. This is a trait that exists in a powerful independent thinker who could push all kinds of debates forwards - academic ones or otherwise.

Her word choice continues to emphasize bravery and strength. “I protect my family” inserts Ella as the shield between her family and the daily racism they experience in the south because of their accents and heritage. Her humorous quirks show the insidious racism. She even needs to shield her family from the humble request for some more Ketchup at McDonalds! Imagine if one is nervous to ask for some more Ketchup and even such a mundane activity becomes difficult through the friction of racial tension and misunderstanding. This is a powerful way to deliver a sobering commentary on the real state of society through Ellen’s lived experiences.

She demonstrates her intellectual prowess in her discussion of somewhat high-brow topics but also grounds herself in the descriptions of her daily acts of kindness.

She connects major societal debates (Trumpism for example) with daily experiences (her translations at the doctor’s office) with a gentle but powerful cadence. She demonstrates her intellectual prowess in her discussion of somewhat high-brow topics but also grounds herself in the descriptions of her daily acts of kindness.

Creatively Ella weaves numerous literary devices in and out of her story without them being overbearing. These include alliteration and the juxtaposition of longer sentences with shorter ones to make a point.

Her final dialogue is subtle but booming. “....my culture was the exception”. The reader is left genuinely sympathetic for her plight, challenges and bravery as she goes about her daily life.

Ella is a bold independent thinker with a clear social conscience and an ability to wade in the ambiguity and challenge of an imperfect world.

Crimson Education Button

College Confidential is your gateway to real, unfiltered guidance about applying to college and exploring majors and careers. CC is powered by our community of real students, parents, and admissions professionals.

"Paint this vase before you leave today," my teacher directed as she placed foreign brushes and paints in my hands. I looked at her blankly. Where were the charts of colors and books of techniques? Why was her smile so decidedly encouraging? The sudden expectations made no sense.

She smiled. "Don't worry, just paint."

In a daze, I assembled my supplies the way the older students did. I was scared. I knew everything but nothing. And even in those first blissful moments of experimentation, it hurt to realize that my painting was all wrong. The gleam of light. The distorted reflection. A thousand details taunted me with their refusal to melt into the glass. The vase was lifeless at best.

As the draining hours of work wore on, I began wearing reckless holes in my mixing plate. It was my fourth hour here. Why had I not received even a single piece of guidance?

At the peak of my frustration, she finally reentered the studio, yawning with excruciating casualness. I felt myself snap.

"I barely know how to hold a brush," I muttered almost aggressively, "how could I possibly have the technique to paint this?"

She looked at me with a shocked innocence that only heightened the feeling of abandonment. "What do you mean you don't have the technique?"

It was as though she failed to realize I was a complete beginner.

And then suddenly she broke into a pitch of urgent obviousness: "What are you doing! Don't you see those details?? There's orange from the wall and light brown from the floor. There's even dark green from that paint box over there. You have to look at the whole picture," she stole a glance at my face of bewilderment, and, sighing, grabbed my paint,stained hand. "Listen, it's not in here," she implored, shaking my captive limb. "It's here." The intensity with which she looked into my eyes was overwhelming.

I returned the gaze emptily. Never had I been so confused…

But over the years I did begin to see. The shades of red and blue in gray concrete, the tints of Phthalo in summer skies, and winter’s Currelean. It was beautiful and illogical. Black was darker with green and red, and white was never white.

I began to study animals. The proportions and fan brush techniques were certainly difficult, but they were the simple part. It was the strategic tints of light and bold color that created life. I would spend hours discovering the exact blue that would make a fish seem on the verge of tears and hours more shaping a deer’s ears to speak of serenity instead of danger.

As I run faster into the heart of art and my love for politics and law, I will learn to see the faces behind each page of cold policy text, the amazing innovation sketched in the tattered Constitution, and the progressiveness living in oak-paneled courts.

In return for probing into previously ignored details, my canvas and paints opened the world. I began to appreciate the pink kiss of ever-evolving sunsets and the even suppression of melancholy. When my father came home from a business trip, it was no longer a matter of simple happiness, but of fatigue and gladness' underlying shades. The personalities who had once seemed so annoyingly arrogant now turned soft with their complexities of doubt and inspiration. Each mundane scene is as deep and varied as the paint needed to capture it.

One day, I will learn to paint people. As I run faster into the heart of art and my love for politics and law, I will learn to see the faces behind each page of cold policy text, the amazing innovation sketched in the tattered Constitution, and the progressiveness living in oak-paneled courts.

It won’t be too far. I know that in a few years I will see a thousand more colors than I do today. Yet the most beautiful part about art is that there is no end. No matter how deep I penetrate its shimmering realms, the enigmatic caverns of wonder will stay.

essay for someone you hate

Professional Review by College Confidential

My favorite college essays begin with one moment in time and end by tying that moment into a larger truth about the world. In this essay, Elizabeth uses this structure masterfully.

This essay is a great example of a create essay. It's real strength, however, lies in showing how the writer pursues her goal despite frustration and grapples with universal questions.

The essay opens with dialogue, placing the reader right in the middle of the action. She shares only the details that make the scene vivid, like the holes in her mixing plate and her teacher’s yawn. She skips backstory and explanations that can bore readers and bog down a short essay. The reader is left feeling as though we are sitting beside her, staring at an empty vase and a set of paints, with no idea how to begin.

The SPARC method of essay writing says that the best college essays show how a student can do one (or more) of these five things: Seize an opportunity, Pursue goals despite obstacles, Ask important questions, take smart Risks, or Create with limited resources. This essay is a great example of a “create” essay. It’s real strength, however, lies in showing how the writer pursues her goal despite frustration and grapples with universal questions.

As the essay transitions from the personal to the universal, her experience painting the vase becomes a metaphor for how she sees the world. Not only has painting helped her appreciate the subtle shades of color in the sunset, it has opened her up to understand that nothing in life is black and white. This parallel works especially well as a way to draw the connection between Elizabeth’s interest in political science and art.

Written by Joy Bullen, Senior Editor at College Confidential

College Confidential Button

At KEY we take a long-term, strategic approach centered on each individual student’s best interests. Working with our college-bound students beginning in Grade 8, we guide them in establishing a strong foundation of academics to build their unique profiles of co-curricular and extracurricular activities, academic direction, and professional skills. We aspire to give each of our students the best opportunity to thrive within their current education environment and beyond. For a free consultation about our services and more, please visit our website .

When I failed math in my sophomore year of high school, a bitter dispute engulfed my household -- “Nicolas Yan vs. Mathematics.” I was the plaintiff, appearing pro se, while my father represented the defendant (inanimate as it was). My brother and sister constituted a rather understaffed jury, and my mother presided over the case as judge.

In a frightening departure from racial stereotype, I charged Mathematics with the capital offences of being “too difficult” and “irrelevant to my aspirations," citing my recent shortcomings in the subject as evi. dence. My father entered a not guilty plea on the defendant's behalf, for he had always harbored hopes that I would follow in his entrepreneurial footsteps -- and who ever heard of a businessman who wasn't an accomplished mathematician? He argued that because I had fallen sick before my examination and had been unable to sit one of the papers, it would be a travesty of justice to blame my "Ungraded” mark on his client. The judge nodded sagely.

With heartrending pathos, I recalled how I had studied A-Level Mathematics with calculus a year before the rest of my cohort, bravely grappling with such perverse concepts as the poisson distribution to no avail. I decried the subject's lack of real-life utility and lamented my inability to reconcile further effort with any plausible success; so that to persist with Mathematics would be a Sisyphean endeavor. Since I had no interest in becoming the entrepreneur that my father envisioned, I petitioned the court for academic refuge in the humanities. The members of the jury exchanged sympathetic glances and put their heads together to deliberate.

Over the next year, however, new evidence that threw the court's initial verdict into question surfaced. Languishing on death row, Mathematics exercised its right to appeal, and so our quasi-court reconvened in the living room.

In hushed tones, they weighed the particulars of the case. Then, my sister announced their unanimous decision with magisterial gravity: "Nicolas shouldn't have to do math if he doesn't want to!" I was ecstatic; my father distraught. With a bang of her metaphorical gavel, the judge sentenced the defendant to "Death by Omission"-- and so I chose my subjects for 11th Grade sans Mathematics. To my father's disappointment, a future in business for me now seemed implausible.

Over the next year, however, new evidence that threw the court's initial verdict into question surfaced. Languishing on death row, Mathematics exercised its right to appeal, and so our quasi-court reconvened in the living room.

My father reiterated his client's innocence, maintaining that Mathematics was neither "irrelevant" nor "too difficult." He proudly recounted how just two months earlier, when my friends had convinced me to join them in creating a business case competition for high school students (clerical note: the loftily-titled New Zealand Secondary Schools Case Competition), I stood in front of the Board of a company and successfully pitched them to sponsor us-- was this not evidence that l could succeed in business? I think I saw a tear roll down his cheek as he implored me to give Mathematics another chance.

I considered the truth of his words. While writing a real-world business case for NZSSCC, l had been struck by how mathematical processes actually made sense when deployed in a practical context, and how numbers could tell a story just as vividly as words can. By reviewing business models and comparing financial projections to actual returns, one can read a company's story and identify areas of potential growth; whether the company then took advantage of these opportunities determined its success. It wasn't that my role in organizing NZSSCC had magically taught me to embrace all things mathematical or commercial -- I was still the same person -- but I recognized that no intellectual constraints prevented me from succeeding in Mathematics; I needed only the courage to seize an opportunity for personal growth.

I stood up and addressed my family: “I’ll do it.” Then, without waiting for the court’s final verdict, I crossed the room to embrace my father: and the rest, as they (seldom) say, was Mathematics.

essay for someone you hate

Professional Review by KEY Education

For some, math concepts such as limits, logarithms, and derivatives can bring about feelings of apprehension or intimidation. So, Nicolas’s college essay reflecting on his personal conflict coming to terms with Mathematics offers a relatable, down-to-earth look at how he eventually came to realize and appreciate the importance of this once-dreaded subject. Not only does Nicolas’s statement use a unique, engaging approach to hook the reader in, but also he draws various connections from Mathematics to his relationship with his family, to his maturation process, and to his extracurricular involvement. A number of factors helped Nicolas’s statement add color to his application file, giving further insight into the person he is.

Nicolas’s choice of Mathematics as the focusing lens is effective for a number of reasons. Firstly, it is genuine and approachable. It is not about some grandiose idea, event, or achievement. Rather, it is about a topic to which many students—and people for that matter—can relate. And from this central theme, Nicolas draws insightful linkages to various aspects of his life. At the outset of his essay, Mathematics is presented as the antagonist, or as Nicolas skillfully portrays, the “defendant”. However, by the end of his piece, and as a demonstration of his growth, Nicolas has come to a resolution with the former defendant.

Adding to the various connections, Nicolas presents his case, literally, in an engaging manner in the form of a court scene, with Nicolas as the plaintiff charging the defendant, Mathematics, with being too difficult and irrelevant to his life.

Through Nicolas’s conflict over Mathematics, we gain a deeper understanding of his relationship with his father and the tension that exists in Nicolas fulfilling his father’s wishes of following in his entrepreneurial footsteps. His father’s initial attempts at reasoning with him are rebuffed, however Nicolas later acknowledges that he “considered the truth of his words” and eventually embraces his father, signifying their coming to a resolution with their shared understanding of each other. Furthermore, Nicolas connects his evolved understanding of Mathematics to his important organizational role in creating the business-focused New Zealand Secondary Schools Case Competition, acknowledging how “mathematical processes actually made sense when deployed in a practical context, and how numbers could tell a story just as vividly as words can.” As he states, “I needed only the courage to seize an opportunity for personal growth,” which he ultimately realizes.

Adding to the various connections, Nicolas presents his case, literally, in an engaging manner in the form of a court scene, with Nicolas as the plaintiff charging the defendant, Mathematics, with being too difficult and irrelevant to his life. Bearing in mind word count limitations, what would have been interesting to explore would be deeper insights into each of the connections that Nicolas drew and how he applied these various lessons to other parts of his life.

Nicolas employs a number of characteristics essential for a successful essay: a theme that allows for deeper introspection, an engaging hook or approach, and a number of linkages between his theme and various aspects of his life, providing insight into who he is and how he thinks.

essay for someone you hate

HS2 Academy is a premier college counseling company that has helped thousands of students gain admission into Ivy League-level universities across the world. With a counseling team of passionate educators with over 100 years of combined experience, we pride ourselves in helping high schoolers achieve their college dreams. Since results matter most, entrust your future to the leader in college admissions with a consistent track record of success.

Successful Harvard Essay by Abigail Mack

Abigail gained national attention after reading her application essay on TikTok earlier this year, with over 19.9 million views on the first video. Her essay helped her to recieve a rare likely letter in the most competitive Harvard application cycle in history with a less than 4 percent acceptance rate, and now she uses her platform to help other college hopefuls navigate the application process. Watch her read the beginning of her essay here and check out her other writing tips on her TikTok .

I hate the letter S. Of the 164,777 words with S, I only grapple with one.

I hate the letter “S”. Of the 164,777 words with “S”, I only grapple with one. To condemn an entire letter because of its use 0.0006% of the time sounds statistically absurd, but that one case changed 100% of my life. I used to have two parents, but now I have one, and the “S” in “parents” isn’t going anywhere.

“S” follows me. I can’t get through a day without being reminded that while my friends went out to dinner with their parents, I ate with my parent. As I write this essay, there is a blue line under the word “parent” telling me to check my grammar; even Grammarly assumes that I should have parents, but cancer doesn’t listen to edit suggestions. I won’t claim that my situation is as unique as 1 in 164,777, but it is still an exception to the rule - an outlier. The world isn’t meant for this special case.

The world wouldn’t abandon “S” because of me, so I tried to abandon “S”. I could get away from “S” if I stayed busy; you can’t have dinner with your “parent” (thanks again, Grammarly) if you’re too busy to have family dinner. Any spare time that I had, I filled. I became known as the “busy kid”- the one that everyone always asks, “How do you have time?” Morning meetings, classes, after school meetings, volleyball practice, dance class, rehearsal in Boston, homework, sleep, repeat. Though my specific schedule has changed over time, the busyness has not. I couldn’t fill the loss that “S” left in my life, but I could at least make sure I didn’t have to think about it. There were so many things in my life that I couldn’t control, so I controlled what I could- my schedule. I never succumbed to the stress of potentially over-committing. I thrived. It became a challenge to juggle it all, but I’d soon find a rhythm. But rhythm wasn’t what I wanted. Rhythm may not have an “S”, but “S” sure liked to come by when I was idle. So, I added another ball, and another, and another. Soon I noticed that the same “color” balls kept falling into my hands- theater, academics, politics. I began to want to come into contact with these more and more, so I further narrowed the scope of my color wheel and increased the shades of my primary colors.

Life became easier to juggle, but for the first time, I didn’t add another ball. I found my rhythm, and I embraced it. I stopped running away from a single “S” and began chasing a double “S”- passion. Passion has given me purpose. I was shackled to “S” as I tried to escape the confines of the traditional familial structure. No matter how far I ran, “S” stayed behind me because I kept looking back. I’ve finally learned to move forward instead of away, and it is liberating. “S” got me moving, but it hasn’t kept me going.

I wish I could end here, triumphant and basking in my new inspiration, but life is more convoluted. Motivation is a double edged sword; it keeps me facing forward, but it also keeps me from having to look back. I want to claim that I showed courage in being able to turn from “S”, but I cannot. Motivation is what keeps “S” at bay. I am not perfectly healed, but I am perfect at navigating the best way to heal me. I don’t seek out sadness, so “S” must stay on the sidelines, and until I am completely ready, motivation is more than enough for me.

essay for someone you hate

Professional Review by HS2 Academy

There's an honesty here as she reveals to the reader her attempts at filling this void in her life by constantly keeping busy. It's further satisfying to see these attempts at committing to various activities evolve into what she terms a double

Abigail’s essay navigates one of the most delicate sorts of topics in college applications: dealing with personal or family tragedy. Perhaps the most common pitfall is to take a tragic event and effuse it with too much pathos and sense of loss that the narrative fails to reveal much about the author’s own personality other than the loss itself. In short, a “sob story.” However, Abigail’s essay adeptly skirts this by utilizing wit and a framing device using the letter “S” to share a profoundly personal journey in a manner that is engaging and thought-provoking.

Rather than focus purely on the loss of one of her parents to cancer, Abigail reflects on her life and the adjustments she has had to make. It is particularly poignant how she expresses the sense that her life with only one remaining parent seems somehow anomalous, that the constant reminders of the completeness in the familial structures of others haunts her.

What also makes this essay all the more intriguing is how we get a glimpse into her internal life as she learns to cope with the loss. There’s an honesty here as she reveals to the reader her attempts at filling this void in her life by constantly keeping busy. It’s further satisfying to see these attempts at committing to various activities evolve into what she terms a “double S,” or “passion,” as she discovers things that she has become passionate about. Perhaps this essay could have been strengthened further by giving the reader a sense of what those passions might be, as we’re left to speculate based on the activities she had mentioned.

Lastly, we see a sense of realism and maturity in Abigail's closing reflection. It’s easy to end an essay like this with a sense of narrative perfection, but she wisely concedes that “life is more convoluted.” This poignant revelation gives us a window into her continuing struggles, but we are nonetheless left impressed by her growth and candor in this essay.

HS2 Button

collegeMission is an undergraduate admissions consulting firm focused solely on helping applicants craft their best admissions essays to gain acceptance at top academic institutions. collegeMission's elite admissions consultants have assisted thousands of applicants in successfully pursuing their educational dreams. As accomplished writers and graduates of prestigious universities, our consultants are uniquely qualified to guide you through brainstorming, outlining, and writing your college essays so that the admissions committees take notice. To learn more or schedule a free brainstorming session, visit www.collegemission.com or email [email protected].

I learned the definition of cancer at the age of fourteen. I was taking my chapter 7 biology test when I came upon the last question, “What is cancer?”, to which I answered: “The abnormal, unrestricted growth of cells.” After handing in the test, I moved on to chapter 8, oblivious then to how earth-shattering such a disease could be.

I learned the meaning of cancer two years later. A girl named Kiersten came into my family by way of my oldest brother who had fallen in love with her. I distinctly recall her hair catching the sea breeze as she walked with us along the Jersey shore, a blonde wave in my surrounding family's sea of brunette. Physically, she may have been different, but she redefined what family meant to me. She attended my concerts, went to my award ceremonies, and helped me study for tests. Whenever I needed support, she was there. Little did I know that our roles would be reversed, forever changing my outlook on life.

Kiersten was diagnosed with Stage II Hodgkin's lymphoma at the age of 22. Tears and hair fell alike after each of her 20 rounds of chemotherapy as we feared the worst. It was an unbearable tragedy watching someone so vivacious skirt the line between life and death. Her cancer was later classified as refractory, or resistant to treatment. Frustration and despair flooded my mind as I heard this news. And so I prayed. In what universe did this dynamic make any sense? I prayed to God and to even her cancer itself to just leave her alone. Eventually, Kiersten was able to leave the hospital to stay for six weeks at my home.

But the beauty that resulted from sympathizing as opposed to analyzing and putting aside my own worries and troubles for someone else was an enormous epiphany for me. My problems dissipated into thin air the moment I came home and dropped my books and bags to talk with Kiersten. The more I talked, laughed, smiled, and shared memories with her, the more I began to realize all that she taught me.

My family and I transformed the house into an antimicrobial sanctuary, protecting Kiersten from any outside illness. I watched TV with her, baked cookies for her, and observed her persistence as she regained strength and achieved remission. We beat biology, time, and death, all at the same time, with cookies, TV, and friendship. Yet I was so concerned with helping Kiersten that I had not realized how she helped me during her battle with cancer.

I had been so used to solving my problems intellectually that when it came time to emotionally support someone, I was afraid. I could define cancer, but what do I say to someone with it? There were days where I did not think I could be optimistic in the face of such adversity. But the beauty that resulted from sympathizing as opposed to analyzing and putting aside my own worries and troubles for someone else was an enormous epiphany for me. My problems dissipated into thin air the moment I came home and dropped my books and bags to talk with Kiersten. The more I talked, laughed, smiled, and shared memories with her, the more I began to realize all that she taught me. She influenced me in the fact that she demonstrated the power of loyalty, companionship, and optimism in the face of desperate, life-threatening situations. She showed me the importance of loving to live and living to love. Most of all, she gave me the insight necessary to fully help others not just with intellect and preparation, but with solidarity and compassion. In this way, I became able to help myself and others with not only my brain, but with my heart. And that, in the words of Robert Frost, “has made all the difference.”

essay for someone you hate

Professional Review by collegeMission

Nikolas is candid, writing about how he could solve problems intellectually, but struggled to cope emotionally during Kiersten's diagnosis and treatment. Ultimately, he finds his way and gains a deeper perspective on life, and thus shares a story of overcoming and of complex intellectual and emotional growth.

Nikolas uses an unexpected approach in this essay, sharing a story of someone else’s struggle, as he highlights change within himself. The emotions and connection that he felt for Kiersten, his older brother’s girlfriend, are quite powerful, as is his recognition of his own attempt to navigate his way through the experience. Nikolas is candid, writing about how he could solve problems intellectually, but struggled to cope emotionally during Kiersten’s diagnosis and treatment. Ultimately, he finds his way and gains a deeper perspective on life, and thus shares a story of overcoming and of complex intellectual and emotional growth.

Nikolas’ use of imagery is terrific. We first see it in the essay when he describes one of his first impressions of Kiersten, with her blonde hair flowing in the wind by the Jersey Shore and how that contrasted with the dark hair of his family. That description then flows as we read the next paragraph, where he talks about the impact of her cancer. “Tears and hair fell alike after each of her 20 rounds of chemotherapy as we feared the worst.” Instead of explicitly sharing everyone’s heartbreak, through details that heartbreak becomes so very evident.

One missing piece here is an explanation of why Kiersten stayed with Nikolas’ family rather than returning home to her own family. Maybe a quick explanation would have helped the reader make sense of her location, and create an even stronger linkage with Nikolas and his family. Additionally, Nikolas might have taken one more step toward the end of the essay to connect this newfound emotion to other parts of his life. The final paragraph feels slightly repetitive, and a compelling route could have been to show how he went on to embrace the idea of “loving to live and living to love.” Nonetheless, Nikolas reveals that he is capable of growing through adversity, a character trait that this admissions committee clearly appreciated.

collegeMission Button

  • Conjunctions
  • Prepositions

Describing Words for Hate: Examples & More

essay for someone you hate

Hate is a powerful emotion that can consume us, fueling negativity and animosity. As a writer, I understand the importance of finding the right words to accurately convey the intensity of hate. In this article, I’ll be exploring a range of adjectives that can aptly describe this intense feeling. Whether you’re looking to express your own emotions or seeking to add depth to your writing, these adjectives will help you capture the essence of hate.

From seething to loathing, the English language offers a plethora of adjectives that perfectly encapsulate the intensity of hate. By using these descriptive words, you can create vivid and evocative descriptions that resonate with your readers. In this article, I’ll not only provide you with a comprehensive list of hate-related adjectives, but I’ll also provide examples to illustrate how they can be used effectively in sentences. So, let’s dive in and explore the world of adjectives for hate together.

Table of Contents

How to Describe hate? – Different Scenarios

When it comes to describing hate, finding the right words can accurately convey its intensity and depth. Let’s explore various scenarios where hate can manifest and the adjectives that best capture its essence.

  • Personal Hate
  • Social Hate
  • Political Hate
  • Online Hate
  • Historical Hate

By using these descriptive adjectives, you can effectively convey the intensity and complexity of hate in different contexts. Remember, words have power, and choosing the right ones can help create a more nuanced understanding of this powerful emotion.

Now that we have explored the various scenarios where hate can be described, let’s delve into some practical examples that illustrate how these adjectives can be used in sentences.

Describing Words for hate in English

Hate is a powerful emotion that can be difficult to express in words. However, finding the right adjectives can help us articulate and understand this intense feeling more effectively. In this section, I’ll share some descriptive words that can help convey the intensity and depth of hate in English.

1. Intense Hate:

  • Vicious:  Brutally cruel, savage, merciless.
  • Vitriolic:  Filled with bitter hatred, venomous.
  • Searing:  Burning with intense dislike, scorching.
  • Unrelenting:  Merciless, never-ending, obsessive.
  • Consuming:  All-encompassing, devouring, destructive.

2. Personal Hate:

  • Scornful:  Disdainful, mocking, contemptuous.
  • Loathing:  Intense disgust and dislike, abhorrence.
  • Bitter:  Filled with resentment and anger, unforgiving.
  • Vindictive:  Seeking revenge, wanting to inflict harm.
  • Envious:  Jealous and resentful of another’s success or happiness.

3. Social Hate:

  • Prejudicial:  Based on preconceived opinions and biases, discriminatory.
  • Bigoted:  Intolerant of others’ beliefs or practices, narrow-minded.
  • Xenophobic:  Fearful and hateful of foreigners or strangers.
  • Chauvinistic:  Patriotically prejudiced against outsiders, arrogant.
  • Misogynistic:  Hatred or prejudice against women.

4. Political Hate:

  • Ideological:  Driven by strong political beliefs, often extreme.
  • Dogmatic:  Inflexible and intolerant of opposing views.
  • Demagogic:  Appealing to emotions and prejudices, manipulative.
  • Totalitarian:  Seeking complete control and suppressing dissent.
  • Divisive:  Creating hostility and conflict between groups.

5. Online Hate:

  • Anonymous:  Hiding behind anonymity to express hateful views.
  • Abusive:  Using insulting and harmful language.
  • Trolling:  Intentionally provoking others with inflammatory comments.
  • Cyberbullying:  Using electronic communication to harass and intimidate others.
  • Doxing:  Sharing someone’s private information online to harm them.

6. Historical Hate:

  • Genocidal:  Intent on destroying an entire group of people.
  • Oppressive:  Systematically suppressing and exploiting a group.
  • Racist:  Hatred or prejudice based on race or ethnicity.
  • Classist:  Hatred or prejudice based on social class.
  • Sexist:  Discrimination or prejudice based on sex or gender.

By using these adjectives, we can paint a more vivid picture of the different contexts in which hate can arise. It is important to note that hate is a strong and negative emotion, and using these words can help us better understand its impact on individuals, societies, and historical events. Teaching children about these words in an age-appropriate manner can promote empathy, tolerance, and understanding.

Remember, words have power, and choosing the right ones can make a difference in how we communicate and comprehend complex emotions like hate. By expanding our vocabulary and using descriptive adjectives, we can foster a more nuanced understanding of the intensity and impact of hate.

Examples of Descriptive Words for Hate in English

Adjectives for hate.

Hate is a strong and powerful emotion that can manifest in various contexts. It’s important to have the right words to accurately describe the intensity of hate. In this section, I’ll provide a list of adjectives for hate categorized into positive and negative descriptions. Let’s explore them further:

Positive Adjectives for Hate with 12 Example Sentences

When describing hate in a positive light, we mean to express intense dislike or aversion towards something or someone. Here are some examples of positive adjectives that can be used to describe hate:

Negative Adjectives for Hate with 5 Example Sentences

On the other hand, negative adjectives for hate describe the destructive and harmful aspects of this powerful emotion. Here are some examples:

Words have the power to convey the depth and intensity of emotions like hate. By using these adjectives, we can better understand and describe the impact of hate in various situations. It’s important to promote empathy, tolerance, and understanding in order to overcome hate and create a more harmonious society.

Synonyms and Antonyms with Example Sentences

Synonyms for hate.

When it comes to describing intense negative emotions like hate, it’s important to have a wide range of vocabulary at our disposal. Here are some synonyms for hate that can help to paint a more accurate picture of the intensity and depth of this emotion:

  • Loathe – I loathe the taste of brussels sprouts.
  • Despise – I despise people who are dishonest.
  • Detest – I detest having to wake up early in the morning.
  • Abhor – I abhor cruelty towards animals.
  • Dislike intensely – I dislike intensely the sound of nails on a chalkboard.

Antonyms for hate

While hate is a powerful and negative emotion, it’s also important to consider its opposite. Here are some antonyms for hate that can provide a contrasting perspective:

  • Love – I love spending time with my family.
  • Adore – I adore cuddling with my pet.
  • Like – I like the taste of chocolate.
  • Appreciate – I appreciate all the support I’ve received.
  • Enjoy – I enjoy listening to music.

Choosing the right words to describe our emotions is crucial in promoting empathy, understanding, and communication. Whether it’s using synonyms to capture the intensity of hate or exploring the antonyms to highlight the opposite emotions, having a diverse vocabulary helps us convey our feelings accurately.

When teaching children about emotions, it is important to introduce them to a variety of words to express their feelings. This not only expands their vocabulary, but it also helps them develop self-awareness and empathy for others.

In the next section, we’ll delve into some examples of how these adjectives can be used in sentences to provide context and further understanding.

Table: Synonyms for hate

Table: Antonyms for hate

By teaching children a wide range of emotions, including both positive and negative ones, we equip them with the necessary language skills to express themselves and understand others. This fosters a sense of empathy and emotional intelligence, essential qualities for healthy relationships and effective communication.

Understanding the power of hate and the impact it can have on individuals and society is crucial. Throughout this article, we have explored the different contexts in which hate can arise, including personal, social, political, online, and historical situations. By using descriptive adjectives, we have been able to capture the intensity and depth of this emotion.

By providing a list of synonyms and antonyms for hate, along with example sentences, we have given readers a more nuanced understanding of how hate can be experienced and expressed. It is important to have a wide range of emotions, both positive and negative, to develop empathy and emotional intelligence.

In our quest to find the right words to accurately convey hate, we must also remember the importance of teaching children about emotions. By educating them about the full spectrum of emotions, we can help them navigate their own feelings and develop a greater understanding and empathy for others.

The words we choose to describe hate matter. They allow us to communicate our experiences and emotions more effectively, fostering deeper connections and understanding in our relationships and communities.

Related Posts

essay for someone you hate

Describing Words for Cow: Examples & Synonyms

When it comes to describing cows, there is a wide…  Read More » Describing Words for Cow: Examples & Synonyms

essay for someone you hate

Descriptive Adjectives for Trees: Positive and Negative

When it comes to describing the beauty and majesty of…  Read More » Descriptive Adjectives for Trees: Positive and Negative

essay for someone you hate

Describing Words for Daughter: Examples and Adjectives

When it comes to describing our daughters, words often fall…  Read More » Describing Words for Daughter: Examples and Adjectives

Stanford University

Search form

What to do if you dislike writing research or academic papers.

BY DAVID GUTIERREZ

Unfortunately, even if you hate writing academic papers more than anything else in the world, you still have to do it if you want to graduate successfully. However, it is possible to alter one’s attitude towards something – often to a greater degree than you may believe. Here are some techniques that can make writing your next academic assignment bearable, if not outright pleasant.

1.    Take breaks

Taking regular breaks is important in any kind of work, and writing is no exception. Divide your assignment into a number of reasonably small parts and promise yourself to take a break after you successfully complete each of them. Both the parts and the breaks may be as large or small as it is useful for your situation. For example, if you write an essay, you can take 5-minute breaks every 200 words. If you write something more substantial, both the parts and the breaks can be larger. Do something pleasant in the course of your breaks – this will motivate you to complete each part faster.

2.    Eliminate distractions

When you do something you hate, every potential distraction is twice as enticing as it usually is. This means that if you are surrounded by distractions while you write your academic paper, you are likely to get distracted all the time. To prevent this, single out the things that are likely to attract your attention as you work and remove them from you. If it is structure and general layout of the paper that give you trouble, consider custom term papers for sale. Block distracting websites using Leechblock or RescueTime, turn off notifications, switch off your smartphone, block out the external noises by some music in your earphones.

3.    Find a writing place that works for you

If you do something you hate, you should at least do it somewhere you feel comfortable. Where it exactly depends on your preferences: some like to work at home, others prefer a nice café; still others find it inspiring to work in the park. Take your pick.

4.    Don’t try to write like somebody else

One of the reasons why you may hate writing is because you believe that you shouldn’t write in your own voice. You think you need to imitate either someone else or to write in an affected manner that has little in common with your own way of thinking and writing. Most likely, you are wrong, and your writing will only be improved if you choose to follow your heart and write the way you like.

5.    Practice

Another reason why students hate writing academic assignments is that they are not very good at writing. The reverse is true as well – once you learn how to write more or less well, you start feeling pleasure doing it. Do a bit of practice writing assignments of the type you have to write most often. Who knows? Perhaps, it will grow on you.

6.    Don’t be perfectionistic

Perfectionism is equally deadly both for enjoyment received from writing and the results achieved. Don’t try to make every sentence perfect – it is impossible. Write reasonably well, don’t go crazy correcting what you’ve already written because you will never finish doing it.

Learning to love writing is hard and long work, and we don’t claim that everybody is capable of doing it at first attempt. But making writing pleasant is achievable – and you can do it.

David Gutierrez has worked in the field of web design since 2005. Right now he started learning Java in order to get second occupation. His professional interests defined major topics of his articles. David writes about new web design software, recently discovered professional tricks and also monitors the latest updates of the web development.

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.

Stanford University

  • Stanford Home
  • Maps & Directions
  • Search Stanford
  • Emergency Info
  • Terms of Use
  • Non-Discrimination
  • Accessibility

© Stanford University , Stanford , California 94305 .

  • Skip to main content
  • Keyboard shortcuts for audio player

Shots - Health News

  • Your Health
  • Treatments & Tests
  • Health Inc.
  • Public Health

Mental health care is hard to find, especially for people with Medicare or Medicaid

Rhitu Chatterjee

A woman stands in the middle of a dark maze. Lights guide the way for her. It illustrates the concept of standing in front of a challenge and finding the right solution to move on.

With rates of suicide and opioid deaths rising in the past decade and children's mental health declared a national emergency , the United States faces an unprecedented mental health crisis. But access to mental health care for a significant portion of Americans — including some of the most vulnerable populations — is extremely limited, according to a new government report released Wednesday.

The report, from the Department of Health and Human Services' Office of Inspector General, finds that Medicare and Medicaid have a dire shortage of mental health care providers.

The report looked at 20 counties with people on Medicaid, traditional Medicare and Medicare Advantage plans, which together serve more than 130 million enrollees — more than 40% of the U.S. population, says Meridith Seife , the deputy regional inspector general and the lead author of the report.

Medicaid serves people on low incomes, and Medicare is mainly for people 65 years or older and those who are younger with chronic disabilities.

The report found fewer than five active mental health care providers for every 1,000 enrollees. On average, Medicare Advantage has 4.7 providers per 1,000 enrollees, whereas traditional Medicare has 2.9 providers and Medicaid has 3.1 providers for the same number of enrollees. Some counties fare even worse, with not even a single provider for every 1,000 enrollees.

"When you have so few providers available to see this many enrollees, patients start running into significant problems finding care," says Seife.

The findings are especially troubling given the level of need for mental health care in this population, she says.

"On Medicare, you have 1 in 4 Medicare enrollees who are living with a mental illness," she says. "Yet less than half of those people are receiving treatment."

Among people on Medicaid, 1 in 3 have a mental illness, and 1 in 5 have a substance use disorder. "So the need is tremendous."

The results are "scary" but "not very surprising," says Deborah Steinberg , senior health policy attorney at the nonprofit Legal Action Center. "We know that people in Medicare and Medicaid are often underserved populations, and this is especially true for mental health and substance use disorder care."

Among those individuals able to find and connect with a provider, many see their provider several times a year, according to the report. And many have to drive a long way for their appointments.

"We have roughly 1 in 4 patients that had to travel more than an hour to their appointments, and 1 in 10 had to travel more than an hour and a half each way," notes Seife. Some patients traveled two hours each way for mental health care, she says.

Mental illnesses and substance use disorders are chronic conditions that people need ongoing care for, says Steinberg. "And when they have to travel an hour, more than an hour, for an appointment throughout the year, that becomes unreasonable. It becomes untenable."

"We know that behavioral health workforce shortages are widespread," says Heather Saunders , a senior research manager on the Medicaid team at KFF, the health policy research organization. "This is across all payers, all populations, with about half of the U.S. population living in a workforce shortage."

But as the report found, that's not the whole story for Medicare and Medicaid. Only about a third of mental health care providers in the counties studied see Medicare and Medicaid patients. That means a majority of the workforce doesn't participate in these programs.

This has been well documented in Medicaid, notes Saunders. "Only a fraction" of providers in provider directories see Medicaid patients, she says. "And when they do see Medicaid patients, they often only see a few."

Lower reimbursement rates and a high administrative burden prevent more providers from participating in Medicaid and Medicare, the report notes.

"In the Medicare program, they set a physician fee rate," explains Steinberg. "Then for certain providers, which includes clinical social workers, mental health counselors and marriage and family therapists, they get reimbursed at 75% of that rate."

Medicaid reimbursements for psychiatric services are even lower when compared with Medicare , says Ellen Weber , senior vice president for health initiatives at the Legal Action Center.

"They're baking in those discriminatory standards when they are setting those rates," says Steinberg.

The new report recommends that the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS) take steps to increase payments to providers and lower administrative requirements. In a statement, CMS said it has responded to those recommendations within the report.

According to research by Saunders and her colleagues at KFF, many states have already started to take action on these fronts to improve participation in Medicaid.

Several have upped their payments to mental health providers. "But the scale of those increases ranged widely across states," says Saunders, "with some states limiting the increase to one provider type or one type of service, but other states having rate increases that were more across the board."

Some states have also tried to simplify and streamline paperwork, she adds. "Making it less complex, making it easier to understand," says Saunders.

But it's too soon to know whether those efforts have made a significant impact on improving access to providers.

CMS has also taken steps to address provider shortages, says Steinberg.

"CMS has tried to increase some of the reimbursement rates without actually fixing that structural problem," says Steinberg. "Trying to add a little bit here and there, but it's not enough, especially when they're only adding a percent to the total rate. It's a really small increase."

The agency has also started covering treatments and providers it didn't use to cover before.

"In 2020, Medicare started covering opioid treatment programs, which is where a lot of folks can go to get medications for their substance use disorder," says Steinberg.

And starting this year, Medicare also covers "mental health counselors, which includes addiction counselors, as well as marriage and family therapists," she adds.

While noteworthy and important, a lot more needs to be done, says Steinberg. "For example, in the substance use disorder space, a lot of addiction counselors do not have a master's degree. And that's one of their requirements to be a counselor in the Medicare program right now."

Removing those stringent requirements and adding other kinds of providers, like peer support specialists, is key to improving access. And the cost of not accessing care is high, she adds.

"Over the past two decades, [in] the older adult population, the number of overdose deaths has increased fourfold — quadrupled," says Steinberg. "So this is affecting people. It is causing deaths. It is causing people to go to the hospital. It increases [health care] costs."

  • Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services
  • mental health
  • Search Please fill out this field.
  • Manage Your Subscription
  • Give a Gift Subscription
  • Newsletters
  • Sweepstakes
  • Entertainment

10 Surprising Facts About 10 Things I Hate About You as Movie Turns 25 (Exclusive)

PEOPLE spoke with director Gil Junger for the movie's 25th anniversary about casting Heath Ledger, Julia Stiles' natural dance talents and more

essay for someone you hate

10 Things I Hate About You is 25!

In honor of the 1999 teen comedy's silver anniversary, PEOPLE spoke with director Gil Junger , who recalled being offered the chance to helm 10 Things — but only accepting on the condition that he could present the material with the maturity caliber he felt it deserved.

"Two weeks after I got the movie, I said, 'I just want you guys to know what I'm doing with this film. I am not going to make a high-school movie for you.' And they're like, 'What?' " recalls Junger, 69, of his directorial debut. "I said, 'I am going to direct a character-driven movie about relationships with a strong emotional core. And those people in the movie, in those relationships, are just going to happen to be in high school.' "

Co-written by Karen McCullah and Kirsten Smith and adapted from William Shakespeare's Taming of the Shrew , 10 Things I Hate About You follows high-school senior Kat Stratford ( Julia Stiles ), a high-achieving, sharp-tongued loner who takes the world at face value and dreams of leaving her West Coast town for Sarah Lawrence College in New York.

At home, she is constantly compared to her perky, popular younger sister Bianca ( Larisa Oleynik ) by their overprotective single father Walter (Larry Miller). Kat's world is soon turned upside down by the arrival of Patrick Verona (the late Heath Ledger ), an edgy new student who makes her look inside herself in a way she has been hesitant to for so long.

Buena Vista/courtesy Everett Collection

As Junger — who, through The Breakthru Company , offers audition workshops and courses — tells PEOPLE of the lasting impact of 10 Things , "I think it resonates today as it did then, because when I was shaping the character of Kat, I wanted her to be smart. I wanted her to be irreverent. I wanted her to not fold to the peer pressure that all teenagers do."

"I didn't necessarily want her to be arrogant, but I wanted her to [know] she is special and doesn't need to prove herself to anyone; total self-acceptance, at that young age," he adds, admitting he was more like the character of Cameron James ( Joseph Gordon-Levitt ) himself as a teenager.

"I was trying to design a woman that did not reflect myself at that age, because I was like, 'Oh my God. I would twist myself into a pretzel to make someone think I was cool,' " Junger explains.

While you're still waiting on an invitation to Bogey Lowenstein's party, read on for 10 things you might not know about 10 Things I Hate About You , in honor of the film's 25th anniversary.

Buena Vista/Getty Images

1. Junger wanted Ledger for the part of Patrick "basically before he even spoke."

Before meeting Ledger, who died in 2008 at age 28 , "I had already read over 200 guys" for the role of bad-boy Patrick, says Junger, while the casting department had "probably read close to 2,000."

"And I had a phenomenal casting director in Marcia Ross, who knew she wouldn't settle either," he tells PEOPLE, explaining that they had three and a half weeks before beginning the film shoot and hadn't yet cast Patrick.

"[Heath] walked in the room in one of these big casting sessions ... I swear on my parents' life, I thought, 'If this f---er can speak English, I'm going to cast him,' " Junger recalls. "He just had an energy that was undeniable ."

2. Katie Holmes and James Van Der Beek were initially considered for the lead roles.

Katie Holmes and James Van Der Beek "were big stars" on Dawson's Creek (which, perhaps coincidentally, is a show that Miller's character hilariously references in 10 Things ) at the time filming began — and Junger even met with them early on about the lead roles of Kat and Patrick.

After being told by an executive that Holmes, now 45, and Van Der Beek, now 47, "might be a good, safe choice to garner an audience," Junger says he asked to be "trust(ed) to direct this movie."

"I said, 'Please give me the opportunity to find total unknowns that'll blow you away,' " he recalls. "And I said, 'I am good at casting — at least give me the opportunity to present the cast that I want, and I'll present them to you and then you can say yes or no. And if it turns out to be the Dawson's Creek kids, then fine, but at least give me the chance.' "

Buena Vista/Getty

3. Junger declined to hire a dialect coach for Ledger.

The filmmaker tells PEOPLE that one day after he cast Ledger, someone at the Walt Disney Company asked, "Would you like me to add X thousands of dollars into the budget for a line item for Heath's dialect coach?"

"And I said, 'Why does he need a dialect coach?' 'To speak with the American accent,' " Junger recalls. "I just paused for a second and I went, 'Why would you possibly want him to speak with an American accent when his accent is so magical?' "

After the individual asked him, "What's an Australian doing in Seattle?", Junger says he told them, "Dude, let me handle this."

4. An "A-plus-list" choreographer was offered to help Stiles with her table-dance scene — but Stiles declined.

Junger was dating Paula Abdul at the time of making 10 Things , and thought maybe he could leverage her choreography skills to help Stiles, now 43, with the scene in which she dances on a table at Bogey Lowenstein's (Kyle Cease) party, to "Hypnotize" by the Notorious B.I.G.

" I said, 'I have a connection with a very good choreographer.' I didn't say who it was — [I said], 'I can get an A-plus-list choreographer to come up and choreograph an incredible dance number for you,' " he says. "And also, that for me would give me the confidence that it's going to be amazing because it's a choreographer of star quality."

"And then Julia, 17, looked at me and she said, 'Yeah, no, I don't need that. I can dance.' I said, 'Well, it's actually a pretty important number. Don't you want a pro who choreographs for movies and shows and things?' " Junger continues. "She just looked at me — no arrogance, just pure, subtle confidence — and said, 'No, I can dance.' "

"And just the way she said it, I was like, 'Oh, okay. Absolutely, you can dance,' " he adds. "And I was mesmerized by how incredible she was."

Buena Vista;Getty

5. Junger fought for Ethan Peck to play Patrick in the 10 Things TV show.

Junger says Ethan Peck was a "brand-new" actor at the time of his casting on the 10 Things TV show , which ran for one season on ABC Family from 2009 to 2010, but Junger saw something in him for the role of Patrick.

"There was just something about his person that I felt drawn to. And I fought the president of the network to get that guy," he adds of Peck, now 38, who is the grandson of the late Gregory Peck and currently stars as Spock on Star Trek: Strange New Worlds .

"He was a special guy," Junger says.

6. A pole was built on set just for Ledger to slide down during his entrance for the "Can't Take My Eyes Off of You" scene.

One of the most famous scenes in 10 Things is when Patrick declares his affection for Kat, serenading her from the bleachers during her soccer practice, backed by the Padua High School marching band.

And his entrance was extra poignant — and extra deliberate.

"In the beginning when he pushed the sound controllers up in the observation deck, and then he walked out of that building and then slid down that pole ... there was no pole there. I added that pole," Junger tells PEOPLE. "I said to Heath, 'I think it would be cool if I could put a pole there,' or obviously have someone put a pole there ... I said, 'Would you be cool kind of sliding down the poll in a very Fred Astaire kind of romantic way?' He says, 'Oh yeah, sure, dude. Done.' "

"Literally the first take, he steps out, grabs the pole, slides down like he's a professional freaking dancer. He just had it," the director adds.

7. Stiles and Gordon-Levitt dated on set.

Junger previously revealed that Stiles and Gordon-Levitt, 43, dated during the time of filming , but insists that he never considered them for one another's love interests in the movie as a result.

"I offered Joseph the role [of Cameron] because I was very familiar with his work from 3rd Rock from the Sun and I was a sitcom director," he says. "And I just felt that he could play that somewhat nervous, somewhat anxious, sweet soul, that innocence of that age, and he killed it."

8. Stiles filmed the famous emotional "10 Things" poem scene in one take.

Junger tells PEOPLE that watching Stiles perform the emotional "10 Things" poem scene near the end of the film — which took only one take — "was easily one of the most beautiful, powerful, emotional experiences I've ever witnessed as a director."

As someone who likes "to be close to the actors" on set, Junger was very near Stiles during the scene, "riding on the front of the dolly." And the moment almost backfired due to his own reaction to the tearjerking scene , which made him put his hands over his nose and mouth.

"I was gasping for air, crying, shaking ... [but] no way was I going to ruin this f---ing take. And the instant she was done and I let it linger for a bit, I took my hand away and I said, 'Cut,' and I jumped from that thing and Julia jumped into my arms and we hugged each other," he says.

Junger adds, "It was one of the most magical moments I've ever experienced in direction, and I've directed some extremely talented people, but that was just everything ... it was one of the best performances I've ever seen in my entire life."

Buena Vista

9. A follow-up film has been in the works for over 15 years.

Before Ledger died, Junger says he was going to offer him the opportunity to star in a follow-up film called 10 Things I Hate About Me , which Junger says he wanted to have a similar "tone" as the first movie, though it might be "hard to connect" now as the film "has morphed" in his mind.

"Now I'm going to change it. But it was going to be a film that explored and exploded the myths of suicide ," he tells PEOPLE. "And because I have danced in that arena and I've been there, and I know that mental health , mental illness , depression , suicidal ideation is rampant. And it's way more prevalent than anyone knows."

10. Junger has been approached for a 10 Things musical stage adaptation.

Given all the memorable musical moments in the movie (including cameos from bands Letters to Cleo and Save Ferris), PEOPLE asked Junger whether there has ever been talk of a 10 Things live adaptation, in the vein of other teen classics like Heathers , Clueless , Mean Girls and Bring It On that have made their way to the stage.

"I was contacted by a Broadway producer who literally was exploring doing exactly that, and they called me to see if I would bless it. They said, 'We want to turn 10 Things into a musical , and we think it'll be extraordinary. Would you direct it?' "

Richard J. Cartwright/Courtesy of Gil Junger

Junger didn't hesitate to say he'd "of course" be on board to lead the production, but he "never heard anything more about it," noting that the "Disney legal system" may have had something to do with the holdup. (A rep for Disney hasn't responded to PEOPLE's request for comment.)

"I guess they didn't have the vision that this younger Broadway producer had, because it should've been ... it still could. The movie resonates so powerfully still today," he says.

10 Things I Hate About You — which also starred Allison Janney , Andrew Keegan , Gabrielle Union , David Krumholtz , Susan May Pratt and more — is streaming on Hulu and Disney+.

Related Articles

  • pop Culture
  • Facebook Navigation Icon
  • Twitter Navigation Icon
  • WhatsApp icon
  • Instagram Navigation Icon
  • Youtube Navigation Icon
  • Snapchat Navigation Icon
  • TikTok Navigation Icon
  • pigeons & planes
  • newsletters
  • Youtube logo nav bar 0 youtube
  • Twitch logo twitch
  • Netflix logo netflix
  • Hulu logo hulu
  • Roku logo roku
  • Crackle Logo Crackle
  • RedBox Logo RedBox
  • Tubi logo tubi
  • Facebook logo facebook
  • Twitter Navigation Icon x
  • Instagram Navigation Icon instagram
  • Snapchat Navigation Icon snapchat
  • TikTok Navigation Icon tiktok
  • WhatsApp icon whatsapp
  • Flipboard logo nav bar 1 flipboard
  • RSS feed icon rss feed

Complex Sites

  • complexland

Work with us

Complex global.

  • united states
  • united kingdom
  • netherlands
  • philippines
  • complex chinese

terms of use

privacy policy

cookie settings

california privacy

public notice

accessibility statement

COMPLEX participates in various affiliate marketing programs, which means COMPLEX gets paid commissions on purchases made through our links to retailer sites. Our editorial content is not influenced by any commissions we receive.

© Complex Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Complex.com is a part of

Why Do Y'all Hate Caitlin Clark So Much?

Is it a race thing? Do people believe she's overrated? Do people think she's too cocky? The Complex Sports team sat down to answer questions on why people hate Caitlin Clark.

Female basketball player in Iowa uniform walking on court, focus on player #22

We've never seen a generational (yes, generational) talent like Caitlin Clark be this polarizing of a figure in sports early in a career. You may combat that statement by mentioning a guy like LeBron James, who has a significant amount of haters but the majority of those haters have a great deal of respect for him as well. His hate was also built up over time. When it comes to Caitlin Clark, there's been a lot of hate and disrespect off the bat. Fans are going to be fans and say whatever they want whether it's based off facts or opinions but when former and current players are piling on as well, you have to stop and evaluate the situation. 

You don't have to like Caitlin Clark or her play style but you definitely have to recognize and acknowledge what she's done for the game of women's basketball. No other college athlete in the past 25 years has transcended their sport like Clark has. Women's college basketball is at its peak in popularity right now and that's on the back of Clark. As Dawn Staley said after the national championship, Clark is undisputedly one the greatest of all time in the sport but not everyone likes to hear that. 

Let us briefly go down some of the responses from the legends of women's basketball to Caitlin's play on the court. Sheryl Swoopes tried to invalidate her scoring record with incorrect statements, Diana Taurasi sent a warning to Clark about her future in the WNBA, Breanna Stewart said Clark needed a championship to be considered an all-time great, and Lynette Woodard said Clark didn't break her scoring record because Clark didn't play with men's basketball and without a 3-point line. These are four legends in women's basketball refusing to uplift someone who has helped changed the game instead they're nitpicking her legacy. Clark on the other hand is quick to acknowledge the groundwork that was laid before her. 

So why do so many people disrespect Caitlin Clark? Is it a race thing? Do people believe she's overrated? Do people think she's too cocky? The Complex Sports sat down to answer some of these questions. 

Female basketball player in Iowa uniform walking on court, focus on player #22

If you don’t rock with Caitlin Clark game you’re just a FLAT OUT HATER!!!!! Stay far away from them people!! PLEASE — LeBron James (@KingJames) April 7, 2024

Is it a Race Thing?

Iowa women's basketball team in uniform on the court during a game, one player in a wheelchair

It’s hard to say that it isn’t considering the country we live in. Whether people want to admit it or not, almost everything in this country can be boiled down to race and privileges that white Americans benefit from that African Americans historically don’t benefit from. Add in the extra layer of African American women notoriously being underrepresented and marginalized and the conversation surrounding Caitlin Clark’s greatness can become even more complex. Especially considering the legends that she is being compared to and even placed ahead of are predominantly African American women, as well as the two teams she has faced in the national title in consecutive years were lead by predominantly African American women rosters and faces. 

With all of that being said, I do think that she unfairly became the face of an online race war that she didn’t ask for. She doesn’t speak negatively about anybody, isn’t disrespectful, but somehow she has become the lightning rod of race debates on X (Twitter) by merely being great at basketball. The hate that she has received is misplaced, in my opinion. - Kam  

Let's be honest, we're all on social media. We've all seen the discourse when it's come to Iowa playing against LSU or South Carolina. I'm all for Black people winning and achieving great things ESPECIALLY my favorite coach Dawn Staley but when it comes to evaluating Caitlin Clark, race should not be a factor. We get it, she's a midwest white girl cooking everyone in a sport dominated by Black people. We get it, she plays at a predominantly white school with white teammates but it's weird to make a race thing when she's done nothing but show respect to everyone including Black stars like Angel Reese. When Reese was getting criticized for mocking Clark's hand gesture in front of her during last year's national championship, Clark came out and said she didn't deserve the criticism she was getting. - Zion 

Is It Because Her Name Is in Conversations With All-Time Greats?

Three UConn basketball players on court celebrating, with one making an "OK" gesture

Listen, you always have to respect the legends that came before you. Caitlin said that herself. All the greats like Maya Moore, Sheryl Swoopes, Lynette Woodard, Breanna Stewart, Diana Taurasi, and many other names have set the foundation but a foundation is created to be built upon. Caitlin is a talent we've never seen before. She's producing numbers that we have never seen before and quite frankly, she's playing with less talent than a lot of these names. Iowa is no mid-major and they still collect top 100 talent in America but compared to the likes of UConn, LSU, and South Carolina, there's a big gap in recruiting. 

Yes, she didn't win a ring but can we add context to that? I'm sure if she went to UConn or SC, she'd have a ring but she's nearly willed her team on her back to a championship in back-to-back years. We can't deny her greatness. She's broken nearly every scoring record in the sport. Let's not penalize her for a team award in college when she's proved her greatness. It's annoying to see greats like Sheryl Swoopes, Lynette Woodard, Diana Taurasi, and Breanna Stewart not embrace Clark for what she's done. - Zion 

Most definitely. When somebody is breaking records and being compared to icons that we grew up watching and generations before us saw build a sport to prominence, there will always be some sort of pushback against new names being thrown in the conversation. It’s no different than LeBron James being added in the GOAT convo as his career progressed and passing the likes of Kobe Bryant, Magic Johnson, Larry Bird in the eyes of the public and other icons to be placed at the table with Michael Jordan. When somebody comes along that passes the iconic names of the past, it will inevitably lead to some uncomfortable conversations, and possibly even over-the-top hate. - Kam 

take notes diana taurasi, breanna stewart, and lynette woodward. THIS is how u give flowers and empower woman’s hoops pic.twitter.com/cj0jBhCyYn — Teddy💛 (@Teddy_20) April 7, 2024

Do You Think She's Too Cocky?

Female basketball player in uniform with "IOWA 22" running on court during a game

To be honest, I don’t think she is cocky enough. Angel Reese is cocky, and has earned the right to be with the resume and body of work she has amassed in her four years in college. She is one of the most dominant and decorated players of a generation and delivered a national title to LSU when they had never won one before. And truth be told, I think the game is better when you have a dynamic personality like Angel Reese in it, it’s much more entertaining. If Caitlin Clark were just as cocky as Reese, it would be well deserved and well within her right. The fact that she hardly speaks at all from what we see tells me she isn’t as cocky as she could be. Lord knows if I were as good as any of these women at basketball, I would be unbearable on the court, and even to my detractors on social media. - Kam

NO! We are the same basketball fans that celebrate and laugh at Steph Curry's shimmy & gallop down court after threes. We praise Kobe and Michael Jordan for their killer mentality and always wanting to smack talk. Heck, we compare Anthony Edwards to MJ because of it! We are the same fans that criticize players for being too friendly in basketball culture today. Caitlin Clark's on-court gestures and confidence is what we ask for daily so why would we hold it against her. She's competitive and she has earned the right to talk her talk because at the end day, you can't stop her. - Zion 

Is it Because You Think She's Overrated or Overhyped?

Person lying on the floor with confetti, hands behind head, celebrating a basketball victory

I just don't get how you can call her overrated. She just averaged 32-7-9 with every defense keying in on her. She's a talent we've never seen before in the women's game. She's brought attention to the game like nobody else. Like Dawn Staley said, she's one of the greatest to ever play. All the record-breaking television ratings included games revolving around Caitlin Clark. Sure, she doesn't have a ring but that doesn't away from what she's done for the game and what she's produced on the court. 

I mean, she dropped 18 points in the first quarter of a national championship game against undefeated South Carolina. You'd think the discourse would be about her performance. Nope, most people were complaining that refs were blatantly favoring Iowa. Instead of uplifting a great performance, we are finding ways to belittle it. - Zion

I honestly think she is appropriately rated. Whether you think she is the GOAT is your own prerogative, but she has forced her way into the conversation and is not out of place. The NCAA’s all-time leading scorer for men’s and women’s basketball as well as one of the greatest passers we have seen means she belongs in the conversation. Factor in that she took a program that had one Final Four appearance in their programs history before she arrived to two consecutive national championship games, it’s hard to see how you can slight her. She might not have won the national title, but you can’t say she isn’t a winner. 

She defeated an undefeated South Carolina team in a Final Four, got even with the LSU team that beat her in the national title to advance to the Final Four this year, and then bested the player most directly compared to her in Paige Bueckers to reach the national championship this season. If you are trying to slight her and knock her down, I don’t understand it. If you recognize her greatness while also believing somebody like Breanna Stewart or Maya Moore or Sheryl Swoopes or Candance Parker is better, you’re not wrong at all. - Kam

SHARE THIS STORY

Sign up for the

Complex Newsletter

Your leading source for what’s now and what’s next in Music, Style, Sports, and Pop Culture.

By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you’re agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our

Latest in Sports

The sports radio host says he relates to Drake's plight.

| BY TARA MAHADEVAN

Stephen A. Smith Chooses Drake Over Kendrick Lamar: 'Everybody Always Trying to Come at Drake'

Booker was mentioned alongside Jayson Tatum and CJ McCollum as the person in the viral video getting the toupee.

| BY MARK ELIBERT

Devin Booker Responds to Fans Claiming He Got a Toupee in Viral Video

Joshua Holloway, then 17, accused Morant of assault.

| BY JAELANI TURNER-WILLIAMS

Ja Morant Was Defending Himself When He Punched Teen, Tennessee Judge Declares

We sat down with baseball legend Alex Rodriguez to discuss becoming a baseball manager one day, the Minnesota Timberwolves and Anthony Edwards, MLB’s new golden era of talent, the Yankees and much more.

| BY KAMERON HAY

Alex Rodriguez Explains How Yankees Will Win World Series, Talks Anthony Edwards as Face of NBA

From Tyler, the Creator x Louis Vuitton sneakers to Damoflage jackets, the legendary women’s basketball coach is so fly she has earned herself a new nickname, Louis Vuitton Dawn.

| BY MIKE DESTEFANO

Dawn 'Louis Vuitton Dawn' Staley Is the Most Stylish Basketball Coach We’ve Ever Seen

Is it a race thing? Do people believe she's overrated? Do people think she's too cocky? The Complex Sports team sat down to answer questions on why people hate Caitlin Clark.

| BY ZION OLOJEDE

People have speculated that Meek was the rapper whose name was redacted in a February lawsuit against Diddy.

| BY BRAD CALLAS

Meek Mill Calls Out Antonio Brown for Allegedly DMing Young Girl After Former NFL Star Made 'No Diddy' Joke

The news comes in the wake of an underwhelming freshman season at USC, where Bronny averaged 4.8 points, 2.8 rebounds and 2.1 assists in 19 minutes a game.

Bronny James to Declare for NBA Draft, Enter NCAA Transfer Portal

Coach Dawn Staley said she believes trans women should be included in women's sports during a recent press conference.

USC Women's Basketball Head Coach Shares Her Support for Trans Women Athletes

The 'Curious Mike' host's "no, that's definitely tough" reaction is definitely getting a lot of traction.

| BY JOSE MARTINEZ

Nobody Was Expecting to See Nuggets' Michael Porter Jr. Have Former Adult Film Star Lana Rhoades on His Podcast

Gen Z wants student loan forgiveness without any accountability. It doesn't work that way.

Blanket cancellation does nothing to combat the problem of the student loan crisis. it would only serve as a further incentive for students to attend colleges they can’t afford..

My generation has a political problem. We gravitate toward quick fixes for massive problems that plague our country. The generation raised on instant gratification, to little surprise, is looking for the same in politics and government.

On no other issue is this more apparent than the student loan crisis. Rather than targeting the root of the problem of federally subsidized student loans, President Joe Biden has instead pushed forward the Band-Aid fix of blanket student debt cancellation in order to score a cheap political win with America's youth. 

On the 2020 campaign trail, candidate Biden championed his plan to "immediately cancel a minimum of $10,000 of student debt per person." That empty promise appears to have worked the first time around, as he captured 65% of the Gen Z vote , compared with Trump’s 31%.

So is it any surprise that Biden's promise to eliminate student debt went on to be one of his administration's major policy moves? That might be why 77% of voters ages 18-29 said student debt relief was a motivating factor for their turnout in the midterm elections.

Gen Z's support for Biden's student debt plan is maddening

On the issue of student loans, Gen Z broadly favors blanket debt cancellation similar to Biden’s proposed plan. Almost 60% of those born in 1997 or later support the plan that has since been struck down by the Supreme Court , compared with just 46% of all voters in swing states.

Maddeningly enough, that same Bloomberg News/Morning Consult survey reveals Gen Z is far less literate on the details of the plan than other generations, with 42% reporting they had heard “not much” or “not at all” of the plan, compared with just 30% of all other voters in swing states.

Why I'm not voting: I'm not voting for Trump or Biden. You want my vote? Choose better candidates.

I struggle to come up with a term to describe my generation on this issue besides “entitled.” Not only are we broadly in favor of other people paying off our debts, a majority of whom do not hold a bachelor's degree or higher, we don’t even have the decency to be more aware of the issue than generations that are more likely to have already paid off their loans.

A sobering truth for young Americans needs to be heard. You do not have the right to demand other people pay off your poor financial decisions. 

Gen Z should push Congress to find a long-term solution

Biden’s plan was not only unwise but also unconstitutional at its core, as highlighted by the Supreme Court when it struck down the plan last June . While I think this course of action is unwise and immoral, Gen Z has a better chance of accomplishing debt relief through Congress, which is responsible for the power of the purse.

Gen Z isn't going away: Don't believe the narrative that Gen Z will vote Biden. My generation is up for grabs.

Blanket cancellation does nothing to combat the problem of the student loan crisis. In fact, it would only serve as a further incentive for students to attend colleges they can’t afford, obtaining degrees that give them little chance of allowing them to pay off the debt they accrued in the process.

Congressional efforts are much better geared toward legislation curtailing the federal student lending programs that have gotten us into this mess in the first place.

The problem is federal involvement in student loans

Our government’s involvement in the student debt crisis is clearly unacceptable. Federal lending programs now offer aid to the vast majority of students.

A 2017 study from the Federal Reserve indicates that for every dollar of federal student loans an institution receives, it's able to raise the cost of attendance by 60 cents. 

In a time when 37% of graduates report being unable to afford their monthly loan repayment , a short-term fix like cancellation will do nothing to prevent future generations from suffering the same fate. Young voters should look to other methods to sway their vote for actual change on the issue, not false promises attempting to bribe them. 

Gen Z should concentrate our efforts on voting for candidates who promise actual change on the issue, or better yet, take personal responsibility for financial decisions. Understanding your financial decision in attending college, rather than blaming politicians for not stealing other people’s money to pay your debt, is a much better use of your time and will lead to better results for your future. 

Dace Potas is an Opinion fellow for USA TODAY. A graduate from DePaul University with a degree in political science, he's also president of  the Lone Conservative , the largest conservative student-run publication in the country .

  • Share full article

Advertisement

Supported by

I Hate Running. I Trick My Brain Into Doing It Anyway.

When your mind hates running even more than your body does, you have to strategize.

An illustration of a person running in front of a natural landscape wearing a baseball hat, T-shirt and shorts with an AirPod in his visible ear. A dog runs by his side.

By Erik Vance

It’s common knowledge in my household that Monday at 5:55 a.m. is the worst time of the week. That’s because Monday is a running day, and I hate running.

I have always hated running. In elementary school, I dreaded the mile run test and was always in the back with my fellow gym class rejects. In college, I was the only baseball player who could stretch a double into a single.

I’m 6 feet 7 inches tall and overly leggy, with knees that wobble in six different directions when I run. And yet, it’s crucial — especially in middle age — to challenge one’s body with a little intense exercise every week.

I don’t have access to a pool or lake, my ceilings are too low for trampolines and doing more than one HIIT workout per week quickly gets boring. Running offers intensity while distracting me with pretty scenery. Besides, 20 minutes later, I feel amazing.

After years of tinkering with ways to start running, I have finally come up with a three-part recipe for learning to tolerate this horrible form of exercise.

But before you start, make sure you are doing fun movements on other days. If your only exercise is running and, like me, you hate it, you won’t stick with it. Walk if you like that, swim if it’s your jam. I have a kickboxing dummy, a pull-up bar and some battle ropes that I genuinely look forward to using. Don’t make every workout a slog.

Hack No. 1: Reprogram your brain.

In past stories for the Well desk, we have mentioned the importance of “ reward bundling .” That’s a fancy term for treating yourself every time you do something that you don’t want to. But what we haven’t said is that reward bundling can actually train your brain as if you were a drooling dog.

Here’s how it works: One of my favorite podcasts is a movie review show called “The Rewatchables,” with Bill Simmons. I listen so often that I feel like Bill and his crew are actually my friends. But I never allow myself to listen unless I am running or getting ready to run. Ever.

This was essential, because in the short term, I started to look forward to running just so I could hang out with my imaginary friends and get their takes on “Forrest Gump” or whatever. And over time, something strange happened. I would wake up feeling dead set against running, flip on the podcast and suddenly be in the mood.

Psychologists call this either “classical conditioning” or “that thing that Ivan Pavlov did to his dogs when he pressed a buzzer before dinnertime .” Eventually, every time he did, the dog drooled. Humans are susceptible to this as well; it’s a key part of the placebo effect and modern marketing .

“I love it, it’s like a ritual,” Dr. Luana Colloca, a psychology professor at the University of Maryland and an expert in classical conditioning and placebo effects, said of my method.

Dr. Colloca said that she does something similar, except with smell. Every time she starts a Peloton session, she lights a lemon-scented candle. Now, just smelling that scent subtly puts her in the mood to ride.

Even when she’s not really feeling like exercising, she said, “it’s sort of an automatic response.”

Hack No. 2: Take breaks, but follow the plan.

I was raised to believe that runners run. They don’t walk — that’s for walkers. So I usually run up the small hill near my house and then down a big hill. But on the way back up that monster, I occasionally (OK, fine, almost always) walk.

Every time I slow down or rest, it feels and sounds like failure, often because I’m muttering expletives. But Chris Beedie, a sports psychologist and professor at Kent University, said that I need to realign my thinking.

“We’re not living in the 1970s anymore. There’s no ‘walking is a sign of weakness,’” he chided. “It’s a structured part of your movement.”

If you want to go for a 40-minute run, Mr. Beedie said, plan your timed breaks beforehand, perhaps every 10 minutes. Or plan to take them whenever your heart rate rises to a certain level or when you reach a hill.

Almost all of the serious marathoners he talks to take breaks at some point, and those breaks can even make for faster times overall. However, stopping altogether is not great for the body, he said, so I should try to at least walk. And presumably save my breath by not cursing at the pavement.

Hack No. 3: Get a dog.

Some days, even podcasts and promises of breaks aren’t enough to get me out the door. For that, I have Snitch, a slightly dopey, highly enthusiastic dog who waits at my door every Monday at 5:55 a.m.

Snitch needs exercise like Cookie Monster needs sugar , and if I don’t take her running, there’s a good chance she will take it out on my shoes.

Research suggests that dog owners (especially ones in Scandinavia ) may live longer than the rest of us, presumably because furry friends make us happier and more active. And while some are skeptical of this , I would argue it’s all about the kind of dog you get.

If you are looking for a running partner pet, I recommend a breed that’s athletic, but not too athletic. A pug is no good, but don’t make my mistake either. Snitch is a husky/beagle/gazelle mix who once lasted 16 miles on a set of mountain trails and looked ready for another 16. She’s exhausting. Find a middle ground — friendly with a dash of lazy.

In the end, I can’t promise that you will ever come to enjoy running. I’ve been doing it for two years now and I still mostly hate it. But every now and then, with the sun coming over the mountains, my buddy Bill in my ear and Snitch frolicking like an unhinged hyena at my side, I’m glad I made the effort.

Erik Vance is a staff editor for The Times’s Well desk, where he focuses on coverage of fitness and a healthy lifestyle. More about Erik Vance

A Guide to Becoming a Better Runner

Training to run a marathon? Here’s how to get ready . Preparing to run a shorter distance ? Here’s some guidance .

When your mind hates running even more than your body does, you have to strategize. Try these three hacks .

Starting a new running habit  doesn’t have to be hard — all it takes is comfortable shoes, a willingness to move and the right food to fuel up .

Whether you’re an experienced runner  or don’t know where to start, a running routine is critical. These tips will help you establish one .

Are you lacing up your running shoes after a long break? Follow these tips to get your groove back .

Shin splints. Achilles tendinitis. Runner’s knee. Dangers abound for runners, but there are ways to prevent them .

IMAGES

  1. How to Say I Hate You! 150+ Creative Ways to Say

    essay for someone you hate

  2. Pin on Another Love Story Gone Wrong

    essay for someone you hate

  3. (PDF) Hate speech

    essay for someone you hate

  4. 10 Things I Hate About You Relationships Analysis Free Essay Example

    essay for someone you hate

  5. 004 Essay Example Love And Hate ~ Thatsnotus

    essay for someone you hate

  6. Essay on Hate Speech

    essay for someone you hate

VIDEO

  1. Send this to someone you hate 🫠 #markielucas #shorts

COMMENTS

  1. A very long insult. : r/copypasta

    A very long insult. You useless piece of shit. You absolute waste of space and air. You uneducated, ignorant, idiotic dumb swine, you're an absolute embarrassment to humanity and all life as a whole. The magnitude of your failure just now is so indescribably massive that one hundred years into the future your name will be used as moniker of ...

  2. Personal Narrative: I Hate You: [Essay Example], 476 words

    Get original essay. One of the main reasons why I hate Sarah is her betrayal of our friendship. We had been best friends since high school, sharing everything from secrets to dreams. I trusted her with my deepest thoughts and emotions, believing that she would always have my back. However, as we grew older, Sarah changed.

  3. What's the Purpose of Hate?

    Hate is the cause of our suffering and our bereavement. It's also what motivates us to stand up for ourselves and those who can no longer speak because their lives were brutally cut short ...

  4. Descriptive Paragraph- The person I Dislike Most Paragraph

    There could be anyone from your neighbour to, a distant family member, or even an acquaintance irritating you. Well, today we're going to be talking about the person I dislike most. Read short and long the person I dislike most paragraph. These are helpful for students in various classes. The Person I Dislike most Paragraph- 100 Words.

  5. What to Say to Someone You Hate (100 phrases)

    Maybe we're better off keeping some distance.». «I feel uncomfortable around you, and I would like to limit our contact.». «It's challenging for me to engage with you positively.». «I believe it's best for both of us if we minimize our contact.». «I feel a sense of friction between us that I'd rather avoid.».

  6. Hate: Definition, Health Effects, and Why People Hate

    Even strong feelings of anger or disgust are not the same as hate. "Hate is a profoundly intense and enduring dislike for someone or something. Hate can be tenacious, and often has roots in ...

  7. How to Work with Someone You Hate

    Buy Copies. Working with someone you hate can be distracting and draining. Pompous jerk, annoying nudge, or incessant complainer, an insufferable colleague can negatively affect your attitude and ...

  8. 'I Hate People:' Why You Feel This Way and What to Do

    Stress: Stress can make you feel overwhelmed, panicky, irritable, and even angry. Prolonged stress can lead to angry outbursts, which can escalate to the point where you feel like you hate everyone. Social anxiety: Social anxiety can make it difficult for you to interact with people and lead to emotions like nervousness, fear, embarrassment ...

  9. [Essay] The Person I Hate Most

    The Person I Hate Most. There are lots of people you meet in your life. It is not necessarily that you like them all. I categorize people by three types. The first one, is which you like the most, the second one is which you don't like and the third one are the people who have absolutely no influence on your life.

  10. How To Interact With Someone Who Hates You

    If you have to interact with this individual, keeping things as calm and civil as possible could be the most beneficial course of action. Try to stay positive, maintain self-confidence, and find peace with the situation. Some people who feel hatred toward others might try to pick fights with them. If you experience this, you might try and focus ...

  11. The Person I Dislike Essay Example (600 Words)

    The Person I Dislike. Hate is a very strong word. So it feels a little awkward to say that I hate a particular person. But there are certain types of people who are easy to be disliked. There are lots of people I met in my life, it is not necessary that I like all of them. I categorize the people in three types.

  12. 338 Words Essay on The Person I Hate the Most

    338 Words Essay on The Person I Hate the Most. Article shared by. Hate is a very strong word. So it feels a little awkward to say that I hate a particular person. But there are certain types of people who are easy to hate. For me, such people include hypocrites, people who abuse women and children, people who gossip and backbite, and people who ...

  13. The Truth About Self-Hatred

    Self-hatred is a childhood survival strategy, but it no longer serves us in our adult life. It is possible to move from self-hatred to self-compassion. The truth about self-hatred, and its more ...

  14. ≡Essays on Hate. Free Examples of Research Paper Topics, Titles

    The Extreme Effects of Love and Hate in Romeo and Juliet, a Play by William Shakespeare. Essay grade: Satisfactory. 1 page / 301 words. Romeo And Juliet Essay Outline Introduction Introduction to the theme of love and hate in Romeo and Juliet Thesis statement: Love and hate can drive people to extreme actions.

  15. More Than 200 Ways to Say "Hate": A Word List for Writers

    baring one's teeth. orienting feet and torso away from the object of one's hate. clenching one's jaw. compressing one's lips. touching one's nose. crossing one's arms and/or legs. repeatedly checking one's watch or phone. flaring one's nostrils. forcing a smile or laugh.

  16. Good Things Happen to People You Hate: Essays

    Rebecca Fishbein. For lovers of Sloane Crosley and Samantha Irby, this hilarious and raw essay collection paints a recognizable and relatable portrait of life in the early aughts. Former Senior Editor for Gothamist Rebecca Fishbein's adult life has been a dramatic reflection of New York media itself—constantly evolving in unexpected ways ...

  17. 10 Successful Harvard Application Essays

    I hate the letter "S". Of the 164,777 words with "S", I only grapple with one. ... Nikolas uses an unexpected approach in this essay, sharing a story of someone else's struggle, as he ...

  18. Essay On Hating Your Friends

    Essay On Hating Your Friends. 1228 Words5 Pages. On Hating Your Friends. This might not be a constant in many people's lives, but I'm sure you might have experienced at some point. Maybe you were a teen and had a friend who suddenly you couldn't recognize anymore, they became shallow and reckless about pretty much everything; maybe you ...

  19. Describing Words for Hate: Examples & More

    Here are some synonyms for hate that can help to paint a more accurate picture of the intensity and depth of this emotion: Loathe - I loathe the taste of brussels sprouts. Despise - I despise people who are dishonest. Detest - I detest having to wake up early in the morning. Abhor - I abhor cruelty towards animals.

  20. an essay to insult someone : r/copypasta

    ADMIN MOD. an essay to insult someone. You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. I wager you couldn't empty a boot of excrement were the instructions on the heel. You are a canker. A sore that won't go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you.

  21. 8 Tips for Students Who Hate Essay Writing to Improve

    When you can do it easily by talking, you can do it just as easily through writing. Photo, fotografierende. Talk Out Loud: Only because you hate writing does not mean you cannot articulately present the concept. You might have a pretty good understanding and plenty of opinions on the topic.

  22. What to Do If You Dislike Writing Research Or Academic Papers

    1. Take breaks. Taking regular breaks is important in any kind of work, and writing is no exception. Divide your assignment into a number of reasonably small parts and promise yourself to take a break after you successfully complete each of them. Both the parts and the breaks may be as large or small as it is useful for your situation.

  23. I Hate Essays & What Should I Do If I Hate Essay Writing: Answers from

    Write down how much you hate it, then start writing an essay; I want to say that you are allowed to hate essay writing. It's okay; all your feelings are normal. Just don't let them live in your head rent-free. Write them down and release all the stress you feel. Your emotional well-being comes first, and your essay comes second.

  24. Mental health care is hard to find, especially if you have ...

    "Yet less than half of those people are receiving treatment." Among people on Medicaid, 1 in 3 have a mental illness, and 1 in 5 have a substance use disorder. "So the need is tremendous."

  25. '10 Things I Hate About You' Turns 25: 10 Facts You May ...

    10 Things I Hate About You is 25! In honor of the 1999 teen comedy's silver anniversary, PEOPLE spoke with director Gil Junger, who recalled being offered the chance to helm 10 Things — but only ...

  26. Why Do Y'all Hate Caitlin Clark So Much?

    His hate was also built up over time. When it comes to Caitlin Clark, there's been a lot of hate and disrespect off the bat. Fans are going to be fans and say whatever they want whether it's based ...

  27. Opinion

    1025. By José Andrés. Mr. Andrés is the founder of World Central Kitchen. Leer en español. In the worst conditions you can imagine — after hurricanes, earthquakes, bombs and gunfire — the ...

  28. Gen Z wants to end student debt. You don't get off that easy

    On the 2020 campaign trail, candidate Biden championed his plan to "immediately cancel a minimum of $10,000 of student debt per person." That empty promise appears to have worked the first time ...

  29. Consumers Hate 'Price Discrimination,' but They Sure Love a Discount

    Consumers Hate 'Price Discrimination,' but They Sure Love a Discount. The Wendy's debacle is a warning shot for brands: If you want to play with prices, make sure to communicate why and whom ...

  30. I Hate Running. I Trick My Brain Into Doing It Anyway

    Hack No. 2: Take breaks, but follow the plan. I was raised to believe that runners run. They don't walk — that's for walkers. So I usually run up the small hill near my house and then down a ...