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Quest scholarship college essay example – questbridge program.

• The Albert Team
• Last Updated On: March 1, 2022

This is a college essay submitted by a student who now attends Northwestern University. This student is a Quest Scholar at Northwestern. The student was awarded with a full-ride scholarship. As you read this Quest Scholarship college essay example, think about your own personal experiences and what you could write about if you are eligible for the scholarship. You can learn more about the Quest Scholarship here .

This is a solid personal essay for several reasons:

• The opening paragraph frames the story and presents to the reader a frustrating situation with his younger brother that leads the reader into the second paragraph with an anticipated even more acutely personal insight into this student’s life. A potentially stronger opening would have been starting with his mother’s condition and remaining focused with the main topic as this opening paragraph is a bit of a tangent in the grand scheme of things.
• The second paragraph demonstrates the reader’s understanding of his mother’s condition. It paints a vivid picture with the reader of the condition, demonstrating to an admissions counselor that not only has this student had to overcome extenuating circumstances, but also that he fully understands the nature of his mother’s condition.
• The third paragraph digs deep as the student reflects on what he has learned from watching his mother suffer the effects of MS through the years. He closes the paragraph strongly with a takeaway of what he has learned to value the most from watching his mother endure her MS condition through the years.
• Finally, the student concludes by wrapping the essay together nicely. The reader finishes reading the essay with a comprehensive understanding of the student’s life experience, how he has learned from this experience, and a bigger picture understanding of the human condition. This is vital. Strong admissions essays often have a message that provide admissions officers with insights of the student’s understanding of the human condition. These essays are often acutely personal and feature an overall theme—in this case, hardship and how the student came to terms with it.

Throughout my life I have encountered many circumstances that have shaped me into the person I am today. I started life in a small house outside of Mackinaw, Illinois. I lived in that house for eleven years, and while I was there I became the oldest of four children. That in itself has been an experience, teaching me a lot about being an example and impacting my views on responsibility. I have a brother who, quite frankly, is the worst behaved kid I know. He lies, steals, and misbehaves compulsively. Academically he is not much better. He was held back in first grade due to a refusal to do homework, and has barely scraped by ever since, consistently getting D’s and F’s. Miraculously, he is now in eighth grade, but he still is not doing much better academically or behaviorally. He is actually very smart; he just refuses to do work which is why he fails. At home he fights with my younger brother and sister and pushes my patience to its limits constantly. Through it all there is a silver lining. He has taught me tolerance and patience. I have learned to deal with other people and annoyances through my experiences with Brock, and find that I am generally harder to anger than others. The lessons in patience that I have learned from Brock have helped me a lot in working with others, and have contributed greatly to my successes in academics, but no single person or experience has impacted my outlook on life as much as my Mom.

Right around my tenth year, when my parents started looking into building a house in the country so my dad could have a shed to work on tractors in, my mom started having problems with her vision. It was often blurry, and she frequently suffered bouts of double vision. She went to several doctors, and numerous specialists, seeking a diagnosis. Eventually one came. Multiple Sclerosis. Abbreviated as MS, multiple sclerosis is ravaging disease affecting the nervous system. MS is caused when the myelin sheaths of nerve axons in the brain and spinal cord are damaged, causing scar tissue to form. The scar tissue hinders neural impulses, thus interfering with commands sent from the brain to motor nerves throughout the body. Eventually, problems with movement and balance develop. The progression of the disease is different for each patient and sometimes leads to an early death, but almost always leads to major disabilities.

Since her diagnosis, my mom’s condition has only worsened. Her double vision went away after a few months and has not returned since, but other complications have risen. Since then, little by little, I have watched my mom lose much of her ability to walk. Today at the age of forty, she walks almost everywhere with a cane. She has been told by her doctor not to drive because of slowed reaction times. Any time we go somewhere where there will be a lot of walking, she uses a wheelchair. Essentially, MS has forced my mom to age at a much greater pace than any human should have to endure. Remarkably though, in these eight years, I have never once heard her complain. Never once has she shown us any sign of self-pity. Instead, she has remained strong, accepting what fate has dealt her. In my parents’ room, she keeps a saying in a picture frame. It reads, “What is, is actual. What might be, simply is not. I must not therefore query God as though he has robbed me of things that are not.” It took me a while to understand exactly what it meant, but once I did I realized that my mom lives her life largely by the quote’s meaning. She realizes that she has MS, and nothing is going to change that, and so she accepts it and keeps going. It takes a special kind of person to do that; I do not think that many people would deal with it as well as my mom has.

Through my mom’s actions, she has taught me that no problem that I could possibly have merits complaint, because, truthfully, nobody cares. Everybody has problems in life, and no amount of complaining will ever change that. If everyone was like my mom I sincerely believe this world would be a better place. Aside from her refusal to complain, I have gained something else from my mom’s attitude. She has taught me the value of our talents and abilities, and that they should be used to their fullest while we possess them. She has inspired me to do my best in everything, and because of that I have been very successful. I love my mom for what she has been through and what she has taught me.

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Essay topics.

All first-year applicants will complete a few Yale-specific short answer questions. These required questions are slightly different based on the application platform an applicant chooses. The 2023-2024 Yale-specific questions for the Coalition Application, Common Application, and QuestBridge Application are detailed below.

Short Answer Questions

Applicants submitting the Coalition Application , Common Application , or QuestBridge Application  will respond to the following short answer questions:

• Students at Yale have time to explore their academic interests before committing to one or more major fields of study. Many students either modify their original academic direction or change their minds entirely. As of this moment, what academic areas seem to fit your interests or goals most comfortably? Please indicate up to three from the  list provided.
• Tell us about a topic or idea that excites you and is related to one or more academic areas you selected above. Why are you drawn to it? (200 words or fewer)
• What is it about Yale that has led you to apply? (125 words or fewer)

Applicants applying with the QuestBridge Application will complete the questions above via the Yale QuestBridge Questionnaire, available on the Yale Admissions Status Portal after an application has been received.

Applicants submitting the Coalition Application or Common Application  will also respond to the following short answer questions, in no more than 200 characters (approximately 35 words):

• What inspires you?
• If you could teach any college course, write a book, or create an original piece of art of any kind, what would it be?
• Other than a family member, who is someone who has had a significant influence on you? What has been the impact of their influence? 
• What is something about you that is not included anywhere else in your application?

Applicants submitting the Coalition Application or Common Application will respond to one of the following prompts in 400 words or fewer. 

1. Reflect on a time you discussed an issue important to you with someone holding an opposing view. Why did you find the experience meaningful?

2. Reflect on your membership in a community to which you feel connected. Why is this community meaningful to you? You may define community however you like.

3. Reflect on an element of your personal experience that you feel will enrich your college. How has it shaped you?

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We are a dedicated College Partner

Stanford is committed to providing access and opportunity for high achieving, low-income students. Since 2006, we have been a dedicated QuestBridge partner. We are proud of the many outstanding QuestBridge Finalists and College Prep Scholars who are current Stanford students and those who are now Stanford alumni.

How to Apply

Learn about application requirements and the National College Match on Stanford’s QuestBridge College Partner page .

Stanford QuestBridge Supplement

In the supplement, we ask several short questions (limit 50 words each), and because the QuestBridge Application is so comprehensive, we ask just one essay question: Virtually all of Stanford's undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate—and us—get to know you better. (250-word maximum)

Frequently Asked Questions

If i participate in questbridge, do i need to apply for financial aid from stanford.

Yes; all applicants to Stanford, including those participating in the National College Match, must submit financial aid application documents to Stanford in order to receive a financial aid notification.

If you ranked Stanford in the Match, please submit the CSS Profile and federal tax forms by November 1. Please complete the FAFSA as soon as it is available and submit it no later than February 15. Visit Stanford’s  National College Match Scholarship Package page   and Stanford’s  QuestBridge College Partner page   for more information.

I submitted a QuestBridge Application to Stanford. Do I also need to submit a Common Application?

No; If you submitted a QuestBridge Application to Stanford through the National College Match or QuestBridge Regular Decision, there is no need to submit a Common Application. Your QuestBridge application is your Stanford application.

We will not review an additional application. If you need to provide us with significant updates, you will have an opportunity to do so on your student portal.

I am a QuestBridge Finalist, but I am not participating in the Match. Can I apply to Stanford under Restrictive Early Action?

Yes; however, you must submit a Common Application. Your application fee will be waived when you select the “QuestBridge Finalist” option in the Stanford fee waiver section.

Since the ACT or SAT is not required for Stanford this year, how can I let Stanford know if I want my scores considered?

In your Stanford QuestBridge Supplement there is a question asking whether you would like Stanford to consider ACT or SAT scores in the review of your application.

If you are not able to take the ACT or SAT, your application will not be at a disadvantage. If you have already taken the ACT or SAT, and you feel that your scores are a positive reflection of your academic preparedness, then you are welcome to self-report them. Your application will not be at a disadvantage if you choose not to report your scores.

National College Match

Is stanford’s match binding.

Yes; Stanford’s Match is binding. If you are matched with Stanford, congratulations and welcome! We look forward to having you join our community. As a reminder, under QuestBridge guidelines, Finalists who match to a binding institution through the National College Match are to withdraw their applications from other colleges and universities.

Does Stanford have a maximum number of students they accept through the Match?

No; the Match is a partnership to provide access and opportunity for high achieving, low-income students. Stanford reviews applications holistically and works to create a strong and diverse cohort of Match Finalists. In previous years we have matched anywhere between 65-90 students, the number of matches can vary each year. Stanford’s partnership with QuestBridge is more than just the Match. Many outstanding QuestBridge Finalists and non-Finalists are admitted in Regular Decision.

Will Stanford consider Finalists for the Match if their Parent Contribution (PC) is above $0?

Stanford's financial aid is need-based; therefore, we are focusing our Match efforts on students whose families are determined to have a Parent Contribution (PC) of $0.

However, Stanford is committed to meeting the full demonstrated need of all admitted students seeking financial aid, including those who apply through Restrictive Early Action or Regular Decision. You can estimate your financial aid using Stanford’s Net Price Calculator .

Can I rank Stanford in the Match and apply to other schools through their early action or early decision rounds?

No; similarly, you cannot apply to Stanford under Restrictive Early Action and at the same time apply to other colleges through the Match. Please see QuestBridge's Early Application Policy .

Can I submit an Arts Portfolio if I am applying to Stanford through the Match?

No; the Match timeline does not align with the Arts Portfolio review process.

If I participate in the National College Match will I have the opportunity to participate in an optional alumni interview?

No; the Match timeline does not align with the Alumni Interview schedule.

Stanford admission interviews are optional, assigned randomly according to local alumni availability and can be declined without negatively affecting the application. Finalists who rank Stanford but do not match to a binding college will automatically be considered in Regular Decision and may be offered an interview at that time.

Can I submit an additional letter of recommendation in addition to the letter(s) included in the QuestBridge application?

It is not a requirement or an expectation that students will submit additional letter(s) of recommendation in addition to the two letters we receive with your QuestBridge application.

If you would like to send an additional letter from a school official please have them email it directly to [email protected]

I am an undocumented/DACA student. Can I apply to Stanford through the Match?

Yes; Stanford welcomes applications from undocumented/DACA students through the National College Match. Visit our How Aid Works page for undocumented applicants.

I am an international citizen studying in the U.S. with a visa. Can I apply to Stanford through the Match?

No; Stanford does not review applications from international citizens through the National College Match. We encourage international citizens to apply to Stanford through QuestBridge Regular Decision.

Withdrawing Your Application

How do i withdraw my application from consideration.

To remove Stanford from your rankings for the Match, contact QuestBridge. After the Match, if you would like to withdraw your application from consideration in Regular Decision, log in to your Stanford portal and submit the "Withdraw Application" form.

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QuestBridge Applicants

Let’s get started.

With the goal of enrolling a diverse class of the most talented students from across the country and around the world, our processes and policies are carefully designed to evaluate each applicant based on individual merits and potential to succeed at Rice.

* Dates are for 2020-2021 application cycle

Application Materials

• September Last applicable ACT (optional)
• Sep. 26 QuestBridge Application due to QuestBridge
• October Last applicable SAT (optional)
• OCT. 12 College ranking list due to QuestBridge
• OCT. 18 QuestBridge Finalists notified
• Rice Supplement to the QuestBridge Application
• Architecture portfolio (Architecture applicants only)
• 2023-2024 FAFSA
• 2023-2024 CSS Profile
• 2022 Federal Tax Returns and Forms
• Nov. 3 Request an Alumni interview (optional)
• Nov. 20 Complete a Rice Senior Interview (optional)
• Dec. 1 Match Day decision notification
• Dec. 6 Deadline to choose Early Decision
• Dec. 10 QuestBridge Regular Decision form due (non-matched, non-ED applicants only)
• Decision Plan Verification Form
• QuestBridge Midyear Report
• Test Scores (optional)
• See QuestBridge college partner page
• Jan. 6 Request an Alumni Interview (optional)
• Feb. 1 2024-2025 FAFSA

QuestBridge Profiles

Meet a few of our own Rice Quest Scholars and hear how participation in QuestBridge impacted their college journey.

Noemi Moreno

Bradley ramsey, arielle noah.

QuestBridge FAQS

Application Policies & Procedures

First-year domestic applicants are those who will complete high school by the end of the current academic year and hold one of the following citizenship or residency statuses:

• U.S. citizenship
• Permanent Residency
• Undocumented who do not hold DACA status but have resided in the U.S. for an extended period of time
• Refugee/Asylee

Students enrolled in concurrent high school and college courses are considered first-year candidates.

Students who have elected to take time off from schooling between graduating from high school and enrolling in college are considered first-year candidates.

Completion of a high school diploma (or an equivalent) prior to enrollment is required for all new incoming students.

Rice requires a $75 nonrefundable application fee. Students requesting an application fee waiver from Rice should respond to the fee waiver prompts provided in the Common Application or Apply Coalition with Scoir. Those students participating in the QuestBridge program automatically qualify for application fee waivers from Rice.

The Rice supplement offers you the opportunity to share more about yourself. This is your chance to tell us why you are interested in Rice and what you would like to pursue as a student here. We also want you to elaborate on your experiences and achievements to share what you would bring to our community.

Essay Prompts (2023-2024)

1. Please explain why you wish to study in the academic areas you selected. 150 word limit.

2. Based upon your exploration of Rice University, what elements of the Rice experience appeal to you? 150 word limit.

3. Please respond to one of the following prompts to explore how you will contribute to the Rice community (optional):

• The Residential College System is at the heart of Rice student life and is heavily influenced by the particular cultural traditions and unique life experiences each student brings. What life experiences and/or unique perspectives are you looking forward to sharing with fellow Owls in the residential college system? 500 word limit.
• Rice is strengthened by its diverse community of learning and discovery that produces leaders and change agents across the spectrum of human endeavor. What perspectives shaped by your background, experiences, upbringing, and/or racial identity inspire you to join our community of change agents at Rice? 500 word limit.

One of Rice's long-standing traditions is “The Box,” a question on our application where we ask all of our applicants to share an image of something that appeals to them. The Box gives you the opportunity to present us with an image that shares something about yourself, your interests or what is meaningful to you. This image is not used for evaluative purposes in the application, but allows you to put your stamp on the application about who you are aside from what you have achieved. Be sure to choose an image that speaks for itself and does not need an explanation. The Box must be a two-dimensional image that is uploaded in the Common Application or Apply Coalition with Scoir, or uploaded in the Rice Admission Student Portal.

Applicants interested in Shepherd School of Music must submit additional materials depending on their area of study. All application materials must be completed by December 1. Music applicants are not eligible to apply through QuestBridge or Early Decision. Admitted students must pursue the music program for at least one year before changing schools. For more information, please visit the Shepherd School of Music Admission page.

Applicants interested in the School of Architecture must submit a portfolio of creative work. Portfolios should be uploaded via your Rice Admission Student Portal. Note: Submissions exceeding the specifications listed below will not be accepted.

The portfolio should demonstrate creative potential and is not expected to be architectural in focus nor professional in quality. It may include examples of sketches, paintings, photography, models, etc. Examples of mechanical or computer drafting are strongly discouraged. The School of Architecture does not accept CDs or DVDs.

Portfolio specifications:

• PDF file labeled with applicant name (example: JaneDoe.pdf)
• 15 MB maximum file size
• Page size should be horizontally oriented A4 or Letter (8.5” x 11”); images should be between 150dpi and 300 dpi
• The first page should be a cover/title page with the applicant’s name
• Content can be up to 10 pages (not including the title page); more than one image or work can be included per page
• Captions of images with title, year of execution, media, and size are encouraged. A one to two sentence description is also acceptable.

For more information about the program, please visit their website.

Architecture Essay Prompts

1. Why are you determined to study architecture? Could you please elaborate on your past experiences and how they have motivated you to apply to Rice University and the School of Architecture in particular? 250 words.

2. Please expand on relevant experiences and motivations outside of your academic trajectory that have inspired you to study architecture, focusing on aspects that are not accommodated by other prompts in the application. 250 words.

Applicants interested in the Department of Art under the School of Humanities may submit a portfolio of creative work. If you would like to submit a portfolio, it should be uploaded via your Rice Admission Student Portal. Note: Submissions exceeding the specifications listed below will not be accepted.

The portfolio should demonstrate creative potential and is not expected to be professional in quality. It may include examples of sketches, paintings, photography, models, etc. The Department of Art does not accept CDs or DVDs, but can access URLs to Vimeo or social media pages provided within the portfolio.

• The first page/file should be a cover/title page document with the applicant’s name
• 1 GB maximum file size
• Images should be at least 2000 pixels on the longest dimension and between 150 dpi and 300 dpi
• Content can be up to 10 files (not including the title page); more than one image or work can be included per file
• Submissions of durational and/or moving-image work(s), no matter how many, cannot be longer than five (5) minutes total

To upload your portfolio, access your Rice Admission Student Portal, scroll down to the Art Portfolio section and click “Edit Portfolio”.

Early Decision Plan

Early Decision is a binding decision plan designed for students who have selected Rice as their first choice. Students may initiate applications to other colleges under nonbinding plans but must withdraw those applications if admitted to Rice. Students who apply Early Decision must submit their materials by November 1. Admission decisions will be released by mid-December.

All admission decisions are final. There are three admission outcomes from Early Decision; the admission committee will:

• Defer - Deferred applicants are considered with the Regular Decision pool.
• Deny - Denied applicants will not be considered with Regular Decision pool, but are welcome to re-apply in the following application cycle.

It is important to note that, if admitted under Early Decision, a candidate must withdraw all other college applications, may not submit any additional applications after accepting the offer, and must accept Rice’s offer of admission by submitting an enrollment deposit by January 1.

Those accepted under Early Decision who demonstrate financial aid eligibility and submit all required materials by the deadline will receive a financial aid package at the time of admission.

Regular Decision Plan

Regular Decision is a non-binding decision plan. Students who apply Regular Decision must submit their materials by January 4. Admission decisions will be released by April 1.

All admission decisions are final. There are three admission outcomes from Regular Decision; the admission committee will:

• Waitlist – Applicants who are offered a place on the waitlist may elect to be considered for admission if space in the class becomes available.
• Deny – Denied applicants are welcome to re-apply in the following application cycle.

Regular Decision applicants who are offered admission must submit an enrollment deposit by May 1.

Those accepted under Regular Decision who demonstrate financial aid eligibility and submit all required materials by the deadline will receive a financial aid package at the time of admission.

Rice is one of the original QuestBridge university and college partners (starting in 2004), and we are now one of only 45 university and college partners with a proven commitment to providing access to low-income students. Programs Rice supports include the College Prep Conferences (typically held in May and June) and the National College Match program which runs October through December. The National College Match is open to all U.S. Citizens and Permanent Residents OR students, regardless of citizenship, currently attending high school in the United States. Music applicants are not eligible to apply through QuestBridge.

Essay Prompts for students using the QuestBridge application (2023-2024)

One of Rice's long-standing traditions is “The Box,” a question on our application where we ask all of our applicants, including students using the QuestBridge application, to share an image of something that appeals to them. Read more about The Box under the Rice supplement tab.

For more information about applying to Rice through QuestBridge, please visit QuestBridge’s Rice University page or contact us directly at [email protected].

Official Transcripts

Official high school/secondary school transcripts must include grades from 9th through 11th grade as well as courses being taken in the 12th grade. Early Decision applicants are encouraged to submit first marking period grades, when they become available. Regular Decision applicants will be required to submit mid-year grades from 12th grade, when they become available.

Applicants studying in an international exam-based curriculum, must submit:

• All official high school transcripts
• Final exam results (for example IGCE/GCSE, CBSE X/AISSCE X)
• Predicted exam results, if available

Official high school transcripts must be submitted by your high school via the application platform (Common App or Apply Coalition with Scoir), through an online ordering system or eTranscript service , or sent via postal mail directly to the Office of Admission. Transcripts will not be accepted by fax or email.

National Student Clearinghouse (SPEEDE server)

Scribbles (ScribOrder)

Cambridge Assessment International Education (CIE Direct)

For USPS Courier: Rice University Office of Admission-MS 17 P.O. Box 1892 Houston, TX 77251-1892

For DHL/Fedex EXPRESS Couriers (common for international): Rice University Office of Admission-MS 555 6100 Main St. Houston, TX 77005

Course Requirements

Rice seeks students who demonstrate intellectual vitality through their course selection and their grade performance. Most applicants will challenge themselves by taking advantage of the rigorous coursework available to them. At a minimum, students must complete the following.

• At a minimum, the natural science and engineering divisions require trigonometry or precalculus and both chemistry and physics. Students may substitute a second year of chemistry or biology for physics.
• Students admitted with curriculum deficiencies will be asked to complete the required work by taking high school or college-level courses during the summer before enrollment at Rice.

Testing Policy

Rice will allow first-year and transfer student applicants to undergraduate degree-seeking programs to submit SAT or ACT test scores, if they choose. Students who are unable to submit test scores or prefer not to submit test scores will be given full consideration in the admission selection process.

While standardized tests have long served to provide an external benchmark of college-readiness that provides meaningful information about a student’s preparedness for the rigors of a Rice education, they are merely one factor of many that are considered in the admission process. As is consistent with our holistic review, students will be given full consideration with the information they have provided regardless of their decision to submit their test scores.

Students wishing to provide additional exams for admission consideration are welcome to submit these to our office. These exams are purely optional and at the discretion of the students to submit. We want students to have every opportunity to showcase their strengths and academic achievements where possible.

• AP Exams, IB Exams, or AICE Exams: Students may opt to self-report AP, IB or AICE exam scores in the testing section of the Common Application, Apply Coalition with Scoir, or QuestBridge National College Match Application. These scores show mastery of content knowledge in specific subjects and may be eligible for undergraduate course credit once a student enrolls.
• Predicted IB Diploma and A-Levels: Students enrolled in IB and A-Level curricula whose schools submit predicted scores for admission consideration are expected to complete their exams and submit final results prior to enrolling. Should conditions related to the pandemic not allow for students to sit for their IB or A-Level examinations, Rice will accept the scores provided by the examination boards.

General Testing Policy

Students applying to Rice University will not be required to submit SAT or ACT for admission consideration. Students wanting to show their college readiness and academic strengths may choose to submit SAT, ACT, AP, or IB test scores.

• ACT or SAT: Rice does not have a preference for students to submit one test over the other. If an applicant submits both an SAT and an ACT score, the committee will consider the test that best enhances their application.
• Superscore: When reviewing SAT and ACT scores, we use the highest score from each section across all administrations. We encourage students to report all scores knowing that we will recombine the sections to get the best possible set of scores for each candidate.
• Writing and essay sections: The ACT Essay and SAT Writing section are not required and not considered for admission. Writing or essay section scores are not visible as part of the admission evaluation process. This policy will not be affected in light of the cancellation of the SAT Writing section instituted by the College Board.
• Self-reported Scores: Students have the option to submit self-reported scores if they are graduating from a high school within the U.S. or submit official scores. Admitted students who choose to enroll at Rice will be required to submit official test scores prior to matriculation.
• Official Test Scores: To be considered official, scores must be sent directly from the testing organization. Rice’s College Board code, including TOEFL, is 6609 and our ACT code is 4152.

Please refer to our Class Profile for more information on the academic profile of admitted students.

Candidates must submit letters of recommendation from their counselor and two teachers.

Counselor Letter of Recommendation

The counselor letter of recommendation serves to highlight the accomplishments of a student within the context of their high school. The letter must come from an applicant’s assigned school counselor, college counselor, principal, or headmaster. Applicants will not be disadvantaged if their high school structure and counselor’s caseload does not allow students the opportunity to build a personal relationship with their counselor.

Teacher Letters of Recommendation

The two teacher recommendations serve to highlight the applicant’s academic strengths and contributions in the classroom. Both of these recommendations should be from teachers of core academic subjects, and ideally one recommendation would relate to the applicant's intended area of study. Though not a requirement, we would prefer letters come from teachers who have taught the student for a full course.

Supplemental Letters of Recommendation

The required counselor recommendation and two teacher recommendations provide the Admission Committee with all the information we need to make an informed admission decision. However, if someone has unique and personal knowledge about an applicant's accomplishments or talents, the applicant may have that individual submit a supplemental recommendation. For example, this could include an employer, supervisor, coach, mentor, or another teacher. Supplemental recommendations must include the applicant’s full name, date of birth, or applicant ID and should be submitted through the application platform or to [email protected].

We recommend an interview for first-year applicants, though they are optional and not guaranteed. Interviews are a great way to communicate your knowledge about Rice and an excellent opportunity to showcase academic and personal successes while learning more about the campus experience. An inability to schedule an interview will not negatively impact your application.

All interviews for the 2023 - 2024 application cycle will be conducted virtually. A trained alumnus or current Rice University senior will virtually meet with you to learn more about your accomplishments and academic interests and to answer your questions about studying at Rice.

A limited number of interviews with current Rice University seniors will be available beginning in late August through our campus visit website . You do not need to have submitted your admission application to schedule an interview with a current senior, but interview slots are on a first-come, first-served basis. Please follow the deadlines below when scheduling an interview with a current senior.

If you are unable to schedule an interview with a Rice senior, you will still have the opportunity to request an interview with a member of the Rice Alumni Volunteers for Admission (RAVA). Due to limited availability, you will need to submit your application for admission before requesting an interview with RAVA. Then access your online applicant portal and request your virtual interview by the deadlines below.

*Please note that you may only complete one interview. We have no preference between completing an interview with a Rice senior or a RAVA. In years of exceptionally high demand for interviews, all requests may not be fulfilled. We will try to match students who request an interview by the priority deadline first.

Rice University has concluded our participation in the Rice/Baylor Medical Scholars program.

We remain committed to supporting our current cohorts as they finish their studies at Rice and matriculate into Baylor College of Medicine. However, we will no longer accept new applications to the Rice/Baylor Program.

With Rice’s location situated next to the world-renowned Texas Medical Center, our students benefit from opportunities to work with leading researchers and medical professionals and are exceedingly successful pursuing their aspirations in medicine and healthcare. We will continue to advise students on the many avenues and pathways to becoming healthcare professionals, including the traditional medical school application process.

You will be notified via email how to access your Rice Admission Student Portal which is designed to assist you in tracking our receipt of your application materials and to communicate your final admission decision. The only valid notification of an admission decision is a formal communication from the Rice University Office for Enrollment. We reserve the right to close your application if you are admitted under a binding Early Decision plan at another institution.

Need-Based Financial Aid

We know that one of the biggest factors in determining the right school is affordability. Because we believe talent deserves opportunity, Rice offers need-blind admission to domestic students. This means we do not consider finances when we review the application. Additionally, Rice meets 100 percent of demonstrated need – without loans – through the Rice Investment, one of the most notable financial aid programs in the country. For more information about need-based financial aid and the Rice Investment, please visit our Office of Financial Aid website.

Merit-Based Scholarships

The Office of Admission offers merit-based scholarships to incoming first year students who distinguish themselves academically and personally within our highly competitive group of admitted students. These scholarships are based solely on merit and financial need is not taken into consideration. There is no separate application or interview required; the Admission Committee automatically considers all admitted students, both domestic and international, on the basis of the student’s application for admission. About 20% of admitted students are offered a merit scholarship each year. Students awarded a merit-based scholarship will be notified at the time of admission.

Advanced Placement (AP) Exams

Rice University awards transfer credit for the Advanced Placement (AP) Program, which enables high school students to earn transfer credit for college-level courses taken in high school upon completion of AP examinations with a score of 4 or 5. For more information about the AP transfer credit process, please visit the Advanced Placement (AP) Credit page.

International Baccalaureate (IB) Exams

Rice University awards transfer credit for International Baccalaureate (IB) examinations for students who hold the International Baccalaureate Diploma and have obtained a score of 6 or 7 on higher level exams. For more information about the IB transfer credit process, please visit the International Baccalaureate (IB) Credit page.

International Exams

Students who complete various international exams with a grade of A or B may receive transfer credit. These exams include A-Levels, the Abitur, CAPE, CEGEP (Science Option), French Baccalauréat (Science Option), Italian Maturita, and Swiss Federal Maturity Certificate. For more information about the international exams transfer credit process, please visit the International Exam Credit page.

Transfer/Dual Credit

The Office of the Registrar evaluates courses taken at other regionally accredited colleges or universities (or their foreign equivalent) that are appropriate to the Rice curriculum for potential transfer credit.

Transfer credit will not be awarded for courses included on a student’s high school transcript and used to satisfy high school graduation requirements, i.e. dual credit courses. Only those students who have more than 20 college preparatory courses may have the Office of the Registrar consider for Rice credit their college courses taken in high school. For more information about the transfer credit process, please visit the Transfer Credit page.

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Scholarship Essays

QuestBridge National College Match Scholarship Essay Sample

We are interested in learning more about you and the context in which you have grown up, formed your aspirations and accomplished your academic successes. please describe the factors and challenges that have most shaped your personal life and aspirations. how have these factors caused you to grow.

A sea of smiling and eager faces awaited before me as I stood on the stage, waiting for the final word - eruption. I grinned as I imagined myself sitting on my dad's lap in the living room of our one bedroom apartment as a video of volcanoes played from a rented library cassette. Occasionally I would question him on unfamiliar terms or why things worked how they did and as he braided my hair, he explained the functions of a volcano and its effects on the earth. At the end of the final letter, I saw the judge smile at me and announce the new 5th grade Spelling Bee Champion. I looked out at the crowd and noticed two missing smiles, my mother's and my father's.

Growing up, there were numerous absences by my parent's, but there was never an absence of love. With one car and my dad working days and nights and my mom working days to support the family, I understood that I wouldn't have the same experiences as other children. When I left Nepal at two, we had to sacrifice some cultural ties. My mother left the family she was expected to care for and my father left his duties as the eldest son so that we could come to America and have the chance for better opportunities. After my father got his Master's degree in Belgium while we stayed in a crowded apartment with my uncle and his family, we obtained travel Visas and moved to America so he could continue his education and where we once again had to share a one bedroom apartment with four adults, two kids, and a baby. We knew our hardships now would be worth the trouble, but that was not the case. As time went on, it became harder for my dad to handle school and keep a job. With my mom working in a humid Laundromat with minimum English, my dad quit school so that our family had enough money to sustain ourselves.

As I continued to go to school, we eventually moved into a two bedroom apartment for ourselves; however, the location was not what most consider ideal. Living near the Detroit area influenced me on a cultural and mental level. I can still remember all the news about violence and a particular one of a man committing suicide just a floor above us. At the time, I didn't know what his reason was but I knew that it was because of unhappiness. Being a child, I couldn't imagine living a truly unhappy life even through all the hardships I endured and it opened my eyes to the realities of the world and what people face on a daily basis. As the violence and poverty around us continued, my parents refused to let us go out other than for school. There was an instance in which my older brother and I were in the elevator along with two men coming home from elementary school and I can still vividly hear them call us derogatory names as we just had to stand and listen. While that moment certainly seems negative, it has impacted me in a positive way. It made me realize that I am indeed different from other people but it shouldn't be something to be ashamed of. I learned that there are people who will hurt me but there are many more who will make up for it.

What may seem as misfortunes for my family, I view as inspirations to strive in my education. Even religiously, I have viewed books as important since stepping on one is considered a horrible sin. I know that my education has put my parents in a bind of wanting to stay here for me and wanting to go back to Nepal. Unable to attend their own parents' funerals, I witnessed them argue more about money every day, which is what pushes me for success. I know there are many families in Nepal who believe our efforts were to no avail, but I know that I can prove them wrong and serve as a role model for children, especially girls who are not expected to attend college, that no matter what the circumstances, a higher education is not out of reach and that sometimes, sacrifices are needed for a greater good. While I certainly did not experience the best childhood, it has been a journey that's enabled me to grow into the positive and understanding person I am today and I hope to continue that journey myself and help other children on their own. I hope to invest in the future of other children's educations as my family, teachers, friends, and hopefully you will in mine!

Original Source: Essay Forum

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Essay Coaching

The college essay is sometimes thought of as the most important part of your college applications because it allows your true voice to shine through. For low-income students, telling your story through the essay is crucial to providing admissions officers with a full picture of what obstacles you may have endured while achieving academic success.

We are excited to offer this new award to all College Prep Scholars. Trained QuestBridge Scholars and QuestBridge staff will offer personalized feedback on the essay you submit for the College Prep Scholars Program. This could mean that your main college essay is polished and ready well before your senior year!

Similar essay review from other agencies can cost upwards of $200 , but the QuestBridge Essay Coaching award seeks to ensure that low-income students are able to access essay review services free of charge.

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Essays that Worked

As we’ve done on occasion through the years, Hamilton is proud to present a few exceptional admission essays written by members of the latest class of incoming students. These essays offer a glimpse into the diverse backgrounds and experiences, as well as the writing talents, so many students bring to College Hill.

Aubrey Wallen ’26

Lakeland, tenn..

75,000 flipped pages. 11,520 packed boxes. 6 school maps. 

I began measuring my life in flipped pages, packed boxes, and school maps when I was 6. As my family and I flitted between states and coasts for my father’s job over the last decade, I shielded myself with fantasy novels. With my head propped on the baseboard near my nightlight and a book held up in front of me by aching arms, I would dance in whimsical forests, fight daring battles, and rule dangerous courts long after dark. In my fantastic universe, I could take turns being the queen, the knight, the hero, and even the villain. These books helped me express the happiness, anger, sadness, and queerness I could not have even begun to imagine alone.

The characters I discovered in novels as I toured libraries and Barnes & Noble stores in strip malls around the country taught me resilience and empowered me to nourish my strengths. Mare Barrow showed me the power of determined women, and I unapologetically strove for academic excellence and obtained a GPA of 4.4. Tane, from The Priory of the Orange Tree , inspired me to push the limits of my own body, so I’ve traversed approximately 1,544 miles in cross-country races and practices. Evelyn Hugo’s unapologetic character compelled me to want to embrace and feel free with my queerness rather than shelter it away in a shameful corner. Even further, this year I am adding a third dimension to my love of fantasy by interpreting Mrs. White in my school’s production of Shuddersome and The Monkey’s Paw with assistance from Anne of Green Gables, my first fictional idol, who massively influenced my personality and tendency for dramatics. But above all, Leigh Bardugu, my favorite author, gave me permission to even dare to write and to dream that I can. 

What began as a safety net in my adolescence has grown to something more, a true passion for English and all that it can express. Language is power and I wish to wield it like a mighty sword. I want to be the puppetmaster, the speaker, and the leader in a world that is crafted in ink. I want to be a New York Times bestseller and to know that whatever I do is impactful and that it creates a difference, no matter how small. I want to walk down a crowded street and see “my book” spread open in a passing person’s hands, as they refuse to put it down, just like I did so many times in the hallways of my middle school. A writer, a college professor, a publishing lawyer: I want it all, the riots of failure, and the pride of success. 

Without the assistance of literature, I wouldn’t be who I am today. If I hadn’t grown up fueled on library hauls I wouldn’t have discovered that I love English. I wouldn’t get shivers when I fret for a favorite character or celebrate their triumphs, be as ready to face obstacles, or be as adventurous as I am. Without the moves around the country and back, I wouldn’t have become so resilient and open to change, so adaptable to life, but most importantly I wouldn’t have become so in love with language. With every move I burrowed in books, and with every book I became me. Literature has made me in every way, and the only way I can repay it is to become the penman. 

Nicholas “Cole” Wassiliew ’26

Bethesda, md..

I dreaded their arrival. The tyrannical cicadas swarmed DC and neighboring areas in 1987, 2004, and again in 2021. I was freaking about Brood X, the worst of them all. Brood X is a cluster of cicadas that descend on Washington, D.C., every 17 years. I live in the epicenter of their swarm. Cicadas battled with mosquitoes for first place in the top tier of the human annoyance pyramid. I hate these off-brand cockroaches.

For 17 years, cicadas live underground feasting off of sap, running free of danger. Then, they emerge and face the real world. That sounds familiar. I have lived in the same house, in the same town, for 17 years, with my parents feeding me pasta and keeping me safe.

Is it conceivable that I have more in common with cicadas than I previously thought? Cicadas have beady, red eyes. After a year of enduring Zoom classes, attending tele-health appointments, and spending too much time on social media and video games, I too feel a little blurry-eyed and disoriented. But what about their incessant hum and perpetual noise? That is not me. OK, maybe I do make protein shakes with a noisy blender at all hours of the day. Maybe I do FaceTime vehemently with friends, blare music while I shower, and constantly kick a ball around both inside the house and out.

At least I do not leave damaged wings, shedded skin, or rotting carcasses everywhere. Smelly soccer socks on the clean carpet after a long practice? Check. Pools of turf in the mudroom after sliding all over the field? You got it. Dirty dishes and trail mix stains after accidentally sitting on a mislaid M&M are hardly as abhorrent as cicada remains, right?

The more I reflected, the more I realized these bugs and I are more alike than different. After 17 years of being cooped up, we are both antsy to face new experiences. Of course, cicadas want to broaden their wings, fly, and explore the world, even if it means clumsily colliding into people’s faces, telephone poles, and parked cars. Just like I want to shed my skin and escape to college, even if it means getting lost on campus or ruining a whole load of laundry. Despite all my newbie attributes, I am proceeding to the next phase of my life whether I am ready or not.

Only the hardiest of cicadas survive their emergence and make it to trees to mate, lay eggs, and ensure the existence of their species. I want to be a tenacious Brood X cicada. I will know what it means to travel into the wrong classroom before getting laughed at, bump into an upperclassman before dropping textbooks everywhere, fail an exam after thinking I aced it. I may even become the cicada of the lecture hall by asking a professor for permission to go to the bathroom. Like cicadas, I will need time to learn how to learn.

No matter what challenge I undergo that exposes and channels my inner-cicada, novice thought process, I will regroup and continue to soar toward the ultimate goal of thriving in college.

When I look beyond our beady red eyes, round-the-clock botherment, and messy trails, I now understand there is room for all creatures to grow, both cicadas and humans. Cicadas certainly are on to something ... Seventeen years is the perfect amount of time to emerge and get ready to fly.

Catherine “Cate” van den Beemt ’26

Freeland, md..

I was born to two moms. One, my biological mom, Meredith. One, my mom who adopted me, Mary. Because they were a same-sex couple, the law required that Mary adopt me in order to be my parent. They used Sperm Donor 3311. All I know about my “father” is that he didn’t have a familial history of cancer, he has a twin brother who is 6'4", and he studied math in school. This is all background information; I don’t even know his name. He doesn’t know mine, nor does he know that I even exist. People often ask “What does your father do for a living?” and I’m forced to respond “I actually have two moms,” triggering reactions like that of my driving instructor, “Oh, well that must be different.” I’m 17-years-old and still don’t know how to respond to these comments. 

When I was 5, Mary, who had been sick for a long time with leukemia, passed away, and my life was turned upside down. I was old enough to understand grief, and yet I still question why it happened. It was terrifying seeing my mom break down while saying, “Mom died last night.” I wonder what I missed out on and carry guilt that I don’t remember much about Mary, because we just didn’t have enough time together. Many say grief gets easier with time, however, I think the way you grieve just changes over time. 

The world kept spinning and, in 2011, my biological mom met another woman, who soon became my stepmom. However, to me, Kerry is also my mom. No longer do I reveal the fact that I have two moms; now I get reactions to the fact that I have three. 

Not knowing my father doesn’t leave a void in my life. “Dad” didn’t sing “there was an old lady who swallowed a fly” and tickle me when the old lady swallowed the spider, my moms did. He didn’t take me to Gunpowder Friends Meeting where I shook hands and spent time with 80-year-old friends from the retirement home, my moms did. He didn’t console me when I began crying at the dry-erase board at school because it reminded me of white boards Mom wrote on when she was unable to talk. He didn’t teach me that love is love. He didn’t teach me who I was becoming, my moms did that. 

I’ve never known my father or that I was supposed to have one , so why would I think my life is any different from the so-called “norm?” If there’s one thing I have learned from my parents, it’s that I have developed a love for difference. I openly accept all those around me and excitedly anticipate the relationships that I will build in my future. There is no such thing as a normal family structure, and my upbringing has given me that greater world view. My moms have raised me to believe that I can accomplish anything. There are still limits, though. My family chooses not to travel to Jamaica because we aren’t accepted there. Before each family vacation, we must research to see if it is a gay-friendly place. I don’t know the answers to questions about my dad’s side of the family. But I don’t let those kinds of things get to me because instead I can talk about the people who raised me. The world is changing as we speak. “Normal” is fading, but it has already disappeared for me. I don’t want anything different than the family I have, and I own that every day

Daniel “Deni” Galay ’26

London, england.

“The difference between an anti-personnel and an anti-tank mine is not that complicated,” I am told casually, in halting Russian, by a boy even younger than I am during a walk through the Chechen mountains. I am freshly 14 and visiting my father’s homeland for the first time, unfamiliar with the harsh realities that kids half my age already know ironclad. My guide points out the areas where the grass is overgrown and the fruit trees abundant. People and animals alike know to avoid them; someone has learned of landmines the hard way. It shouldn’t surprise me — the scars of war on this rugged country are omnipresent — but it is so jarringly different from my life in London that it is nevertheless hard to digest.

It also differs from my father’s rosy stories about his childhood in Katyr-Yurt, stories that made me wish to swim carefree in icy rivers, devour handfuls of fresh sour cherries straight from the tree, and see nights dense with stars. I still experience these beauties of place, but my eyes are now open to the less romanticized parts, both enriching and complicating my connection to my family’s past. Suddenly, too, I am made uncomfortably aware of the conflicting layers of my familial identity. It is the Russian of my Muscovite, Jewish mother that I grew up speaking at home. Yet the Chechen children speak in broken Russian, and the grownups who are more fluent in it are not keen to communicate in the enemy’s language. Seeing the ugly scars of war, both physical and psychological, I cannot help but feel like an intruder, ashamed not only of my Russianness but also of my city-boy naivete. Despite this shame, I yearn to discover what it means to be Chechen, to see their home through their eyes, and through this desire, I begin to feel a deep connection all of my own to this beautiful, fraught land. 

In Moscow, my new awareness of conflicting identities only intensifies, but now on account of the maternal side of my heritage. Relatives there largely see Chechens as terrorists and raise an eyebrow when they hear where I have spent my summer. Babushka’s neighbour, a nurse who witnessed the carnage from the theatre siege in Moscow, turns away disgustedly when she overhears me relate the beauty of the mountains and the notable generosity of the people. Once again, I register the fear and distrust of “the other” that reigns in the more homogeneous cultures in Russia, making me appreciate the diversity of London all the more. 

When I return there, I cannot slip back into life as normal as I have done after past summers. I find myself pondering the question of identity and the way people interpret their own past, informed just as much by collective emotion and memory as by fact. The cosmopolitanism of London is just as I remembered it, but the things I loved about it I now see in a new light. I had always revelled in the fact that, despite our differences in heritage, my peers and I had seen each other as the same — bound together by being Londoners first and foremost. Now I am interested in conversations that I would never have considered previously, wanting not only to share my newfound experiences but also learn about the personal histories of my friends, many of whom, like me, are the children of immigrants to the UK. When did they come to explore and interrogate their own complicated identities? How did these discoveries make them feel? What does it mean to carry the stories, the poetry, and the pain of so many places within them? Questions like these, which were so important for me to answer about myself, also became a powerful place from which to understand more deeply the people around me and the complex world we share.

Zachary Yasinov ’26

Syosset, n.y..

I know that I had prepared well for this moment. For two arduous months, I readied my fingers for an exciting concert. No anxiety could undermine my confidence in my preparation, and my piano recital’s success was “in the bag.” I selected three pieces for my repertoire: the ambience of Erik Satie’s Gymnopedie No. 1 as the opener, a somber contemplation of Beethoven’s First Movement of the Moonlight Sonata , and Bach’s light and surreal Prelude in C Major for the conclusion.

My shining moment arrived, and I strode purposefully toward the piano. The building in which my performance was held was new, but its dwellers were old. Respect and prestige permeated the atmosphere as I took each stride to my seat. As I sat down, the chair creaked and moaned as if in sympathy with the audience’s aching desire to hear me play. I prepared my sheet music and commenced my epic moment.

Never was such an exhilarating performance heard. All of the little techniques and tricks that I practiced were executed perfectly. I captured the dynamics I wanted to express in Satie’s phonological experiment with each chord to which I applied varying pressure. Moving onto one of Beethoven’s most famous works, I crafted the cascading arpeggios of each new chord, which resonated unity uninterrupted in me and in the audience. When I concluded with the airy prelude from Bach’s Well-Tempered Clavier , the room swelled with bliss. Having poured my heart and soul into each piece, I beamed with pride.

As customary for a stellar show, I rose to bow to the audience to thank them for their eruption of applause. Flowers were thrown, cheers elicited, and standing ovations bestowed. From the subsiding din came a faint question to rain on my parade: “Could you play something more lively, darling, say, a Neil Diamond song?”

I work on weekends at a long-term-care facility, and my geriatric audience, although a pleasure with whom to interact, can be brutally honest. Begrudgingly, I thanked Mrs. Hersch for her request, promised her better next time, and stewed in my own irrelevance. Going home that day, my feathers were ruffled. How could any civilized listener, after such a superb medley, disregard such time-honored compositions? The notion was absurd.

Yet perhaps more outlandish, as I later acknowledged, was my visceral reaction to the events that had transpired. Why did I react hesitantly to a simple request made in earnestness? It would have been easier, in fact, to practice “Sweet Caroline” than to break my fingers over Beethoven’s work. Then, in my moments of introspection, I concluded that my choice of musical pieces mattered little as long as my audience enjoyed them. Whether it meant recreating the most tortured and heinously composed pop song or a masterfully crafted Romantic concerto, I vowed to play them all.

Throughout my life, my adult mentors have succored me with platitudes when most needed, which laid the foundation for my confidence. Yet, while working with people who have lived five times longer than I have, experiencing so much more than I can imagine, I know that the world does not revolve around my tastes and interests. I’m okay with that. Thus, for a couple of hours each day in the living room, unlucky family members passing by are subjected to the torment of my tenth run-through of “Sweet Caroline” as I prepare for my next recital for an audience that has taught me more about personal preferences, and myself, than I anticipated.

Katherine “Katy” Appleman ’26

Pittsburgh, pa..

I have never felt such palpable emotion, such profound grief emanating from a space, as I did while hiking through the forest fire scorch in Philmont, New Mexico. A universe had once existed under the protection of these Ponderosa Pine, now black and crusted, turning brittle in the wind. It was a landscape that didn’t sing its laments, but whispered of its loss through every pile of scalded timber and skinny, wavering shadow cast by the hollow towers of ash.

I felt prepared when I made the decision to become a scout. I love nature and camping. I love the Scouts BSA program. I love the people. I was definitely not prepared, however, for the numerous challenges I would face during my years as a scout.

I was the first female “boy scout” in my town, which continues to be both my greatest honor and a constant reminder of the isolation and insecurity that comes with being any “first.” I became a symbol, whether for good or bad, and my actions not only spoke of me, but of the future young women in Scouts BSA. I felt like an imposter.

I wasn’t a strong-willed leader like those who usually have “first” stitched into their title. My seventh-grade acting career did little to veil a shy and insecure girl who crumbled at overheard comments on how I didn’t belong or how girls like me were poisoning BSA’s spirit. As time passed, I found myself waiting to develop the toughened heart that the leaders that I knew held. As my troop and I backpacked in Philmont Scout Ranch this past summer, my doubts and insecurities seemed to echo from this inky forest.

Coming from Pittsburgh, I had expected the kind of desert with raspy air and coat hanger cacti. Nothing quite shattered this expectation as much as putting on my last pair of dry socks before the fourth day of downpours. We navigated steep cliffs and vibrant meadows, and pulled ourselves up peak after peak. As the sun set on one of our final evenings, the flat, mountain-ornamented horizon gave way to a modest footpath, daring into a new forest. This forest, differing from the field of burnt pines we had seen prior, had burned several decades ago. The fire had cleared everything and had left its signature singed onto the bottom 10 feet of every tree. The forest floor was clean. Wild grasses with accents of purple and blue flowers blanketed the ground below the pines like snow, which had fallen while the world was asleep, completely untouched and extending to infinity. Above the burnt limbs of the trees, thick bundles of green needles soared into the sky.

Not long after Philmont, I was awarded my Eagle Rank, the culmination of my experience as a scout. I believe that my time in Scouts BSA has been the first to the forest that is my life. Though scars remain from my experience, new change and strength have flourished out of the damage.

I have come to the conclusion that it is not always the fierce leader who becomes a “first.” It is the extra hours. It is finding a way to listen to criticism and try harder, rather than feel the thorns. It is using one’s own feeling of isolation to see others who feel alone. It is the act of going through the fire and staying with it, allowing it to advance you, which changes people who dare to be a “first” into the leaders that they go down in history as being.

As I think back on my experience in Philmont, the first forest we saw, this blackened graveyard, is what I picture. I remember the charcoaled ground so vividly, but more so, I remember the soft purple wildflowers hidden in the desert soil. Though few and far between, against the grieving timber, they were stars.

Claire Lazar ’26

New york, n.y..

I’m 6. The sounds of hornpipe and laughter drift across the gymnasium-turned-cafeteria-turned-auditorium. Mum caught me dancing to some of her old Irish tapes — the Chieftains, Sinead O’Connor. She asked me if I wanted to do it for real. I said sure and went back to dancing. Now a freckled woman digs around in a cardboard box and pulls out a pair of dusty, worn black shoes. “Don’t worry,” she says, “you’ll learn eventually.” The shoes are too big; they sag at the toes. I approach the stage. Twenty-five pairs of eyes fix on me. In a room bustling with motion, everything stands still. It doesn’t matter that I feel like a clown in an ill-fitting costume. All that matters is the dancing.

I’m 9. I sit in the hallway of the Times Square Marriott watching girls in big wigs and sparkly dresses run around, squawking like glamorous, unhinged chickens. In my tartan skirt and simple bun, I feel like an ugly duckling. The bobby pins dutifully securing my bun in place make my scalp ache. My hands slide to my shoes. They’re too tight. Mum put them on her feet to “try and stretch them out a little.” I pass some over-enthusiastic dance moms who put the “mother” in “smother.” I reach the stage. A hundred pairs of eyes fix on me. In a hotel bustling with motion, everything stands still. It doesn’t matter that I’m out of place. All that matters is the dancing.

I’m 12. My brain won’t stop flipping through disastrous scenarios as I stand with my teammates in a hotel in Orlando, Florida. We’ve trained for months, sacrificed everything for this moment. I try to think of happy things: the pride on Dad’s face when he watches me dance, the freedom of flying across a stage on invisible wings. We recite our steps like a poem, the sequences like a song that carries us through an ocean of fiddles, pipes, and drums. My parents sacrificed a lot to send me here. I want to make them proud. I want to make myself proud. We approach the national stage. A thousand pairs of eyes fix on me. In a world bustling with motion, everything stands still. It doesn’t matter that I feel like a fraud. All that matters is the dancing.

I’m 15. An Irish accent lilts through the ballroom of the World Championships. It sounds like mashed potatoes and Sunday bests and the green hills of home that I know so well. We mutter a prayer. I’m not sure I believe in God, though I should. I look at my partner and wish we were more than friends. She smiles. I don’t think God believes in me. We ascend the stage. A million pairs of eyes fix on me. In a universe bustling with motion, everything stands still. It doesn’t matter that I’ll never be enough. All that matters is the dancing.

I’ll be 18. Murmuring voices will hover in the air of the gymnasium-turned-cafeteria-turned-auditorium. A little girl will approach me timidly, wearing a very old tartan skirt. I’ll reach out softly, adjusting her bun to soothe her aching scalp. Then, I’ll slide my hands toward her feet, toward a pair of small, dusty shoes. “You’ll learn,” I’ll say. They’ll sag at the toes, but I’ll reassure her: “Don’t worry. You’ll grow into them.” Then, she and I will look at my own beloved shoes. They’ll be worn, but I’ll tell her the creases are like a map, evidence of the places I’ve been, the heartbreaks I’ve suffered, the joy I’ve danced. My life is in these shoes. We’ll hear the music begin to play, the tide of fiddles, and pipes, and drums. I’ll take her hand and, with a deep breath, we’ll climb the stage. “Ahd mor.” It won’t matter that this is the end. All that has ever mattered is the dancing.

Katherine “Kat” Showalter ’26

Los altos, calif..

The black void descends toward the young girl standing in the grassy field. It slowly creeps up on her, and as it reaches for her perfectly white dress … Swipe . I quickly wipe away the paint without a thought except for panic. Before I realize what I have done, the black droop becomes an ugly smear of black paint. The peaceful picture of the girl standing in the meadow is nowhere to be seen. Even though I successfully avoid having the spilled paint touch the dress, all I can focus on is the black smudge. The stupid black smudge . As I continue to stare at the enemy in front of me, I hear Bob Ross’s annoyingly cheerful voice in my head: “There are no mistakes, only happy accidents.” At this moment, I completely disagree. There is nothing happy about this, only frustration.

Actually, there is one other emotion: excitement . Don’t get me wrong; I’m not excited about making a mistake and definitely not happy about the accident. But I am thrilled at the challenge. The black smudge is taunting me, challenging me to fix the painting that took me hours to do. It is my opponent, and I am not planning to back off, not planning to lose.

Looking back at the painting, I refuse to see only the black smudge. If lacrosse has taught me one thing, it is that I will not be bested by my mistakes. I snatch my picture and run downstairs, carefully setting it against the living room window. The TV newscaster drones in the background, “California continues to be engulfed in flames as the fires continue to burn.” I slowly step back from my painting. California fires , I think, as I look up into the blood-orange sky. California Fires! I look at the painting, imagining the black smudge not as a black void, but smoke creeping up on the girl as she watches the meadow burn.

I grab my painting and run back to my room. The orange sky casts eerie shadows as I throw open my blinds. My hands reach first toward the reds, oranges, and yellows: reds as rich as blood; oranges as beautiful as California poppies; yellows as bright as the sun. I splatter them on my palette, making a beautiful assortment of colors that reminds me of one thing: fire. A rich, beautiful, bright thing, but at the same time, dangerous. My hand levitates toward the white and black. White, my ally: peaceful, wonderful, simple white . Black, my enemy: annoying, frustrating, chaotic black . I splat both of them onto a different palette as I create different shades of gray.

My brush first dips into red, orange, and yellow as I create the flame around the girl. The flame engulfs the meadow, each stroke of red covering the serene nature. Next is the smoke, I sponge the dull colors onto the canvas, hazing over the fire and the trees, and, most importantly, hiding the smudge.

But it doesn’t work. It just looks like more blobs to cover the black smudge. What could make the gray paint turn into the hazy clouds that I have been experiencing for the past several days? I crack my knuckles in habit, and that’s when a new idea pops into my head. My calloused fingers dip into the cold, slimy gray paint, which slowly warms as I rub it between my fingers. My fingers descend onto the canvas, and as they brush against the fabric, I can feel the roughness of the dried paint as I add the new layer. As I work, the tension from my body releases. With each stroke of my fingers, I see what used to be the blobs turn into the thing that has kept me inside my house for weeks. As I lift my last finger off the canvas, I step back and gaze at my new creation. I have won.

These essays were published in the Fall 2022  Hamilton magazine and illustrated by Andrew Vickery. These essays follow four similar collections from the Class of 2022 ,  Class of 2018 , Class of 2012 , and Class of 2007 .

College Essay Writing Tips

The Hamilton Admission Team offers these tips for you to consider when sitting down to write your college application essays.

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Nail the Questbridge College Prep Scholars Essays

• The structure.  Introduce your topic briefly (approximately 25 words maximum).  Provide a reasonable transition that logically flows into your thesis.  Your thesis is simply your answer to their question.  Use at least 150 words to elaborate and provide “proof” for your thesis. Use the last 25 words to close out with a conclusion.  Do your best to use all 200 words.
• The topic.  Remember, this short essay is focused on intellectual curiosity .  That means, focus on an academic topic.  Don’t “dumb down” your language when discussing a theory or concept.
• The tone.  Your goal is to convey authentic interest and engagement in the subject matter.  Use compelling language without going overboard.  For example, most students wouldn’t legitimately gush about linear algebra.
• The proof.  Don’t just tell, you need to show.  Provide meaningful examples to exemplify your interest.  It’s helpful to link the topic to your intended major.  This makes logical sense, and it allows you to provide examples from Honors or AP/IB coursework, workshops, lectures, summer research, on-campus clubs, online courses, community college courses, or internships.
• Political affiliation (immigrants rights, women’s rights, global climate, etc.)
• Mental Health (depression, suicide rates, anxiety, etc.)
• Access to 4-year Colleges
• Health Issues
• Gender Issues
• Socioeconomic Issues
• Race, Ethnicity, or Culture
• Sexual Orientation
• Convey Impact.  The goal is not to simply declare that something caused you to change your perspective.  You must provide reasonable and logical “proof” to explain how your changed opinion or perspective impacted you.  In other words, what was the outcome of your new perspective?  Did it cause you to join a group?  Lead a movement?  Change your lifestyle?  Confirm you future major?
• Convey Intellectual Depth.  Focus on a topic that conveys critical analysis, introspection, and reflection.  How did you arrive at your new perspective?  Describe the mental process you engaged in, and how you eventually arrived at your new position or perspective.
• Link to Scholarly Pursuits or Future Career Plans.  If this experience shifted or solidified your intended college major, tell them.  As well, did this new perspective compel you to consider a future career?  Remember, this is a “College Prep” program, so stay within the overall theme.
• You can’t pick and choose!  You must respond to all four (4) subtopics in this prompt.  Respond in the order in which they are listed.
• Begin with describing the context "in which you have grown up."  This context could include your family background, immigrant status, culture, etc. 
• Don’t underestimate the fact that Questbridge programs are geared exclusively for low-income students.  That means you should place particular emphasis on how your family’s socioeconomic status impacted you.  The impact may be academically (did you attend a low-performing school or a Title 1 campus?); health-wise (did your family lack healthcare benefits?); residence (apartment rental, sharing home with other families?), or regarding college preparation (lack of tutors, lack of AP courses, lack of test prep programs, etc.).  These are just examples.
• Make sure to list succinct factors, and then focus on providing details related to these factors.  For example, if attending a low-performing school was a significant factor, elaborate on that topic and provide concrete details on how that factor impacted your performance and/or aspirations.
• They are assuming the factors you listed are indeed aligned with your academic pursuits, personal life, and aspirations.
• “Aspirations” may include academic, career, community service, or civic-minded goals.  Make sure to include both short-term and long-term goals.  Utilize persuasive language that indicates you have a solid plan and the means to actualize this plan.
• Most importantly, listing challenging factors or obstacles is not enough.  End your essay with describing how these factors positively influenced and impacted your goals.  If you need examples, see my infographic on how to “flip” a negative to a positive.
• “Helping you grow” can refer to intellectual or psychological growth.  It can be represented by a new mindset, perspective, or attitude. 
• Bottom line, they are looking for candidates who have experienced adversity but have come out #winning.

Posted March 17th, 2020 by Quetzal Mama

Quetzal Mama

Quetzal Mama is a national resource for students and families from historically underrepresented groups seeking exceptional college advisement and support. We provide coaching programs, college boot camps, award-winning books, a popular blog, workshops and webinars, and a host of free services to get students into the BEST colleges.

Choose Your Test

Sat / act prep online guides and tips, 177 college essay examples for 11 schools + expert analysis.

College Admissions , College Essays

The personal statement might just be the hardest part of your college application. Mostly this is because it has the least guidance and is the most open-ended. One way to understand what colleges are looking for when they ask you to write an essay is to check out the essays of students who already got in—college essays that actually worked. After all, they must be among the most successful of this weird literary genre.

In this article, I'll go through general guidelines for what makes great college essays great. I've also compiled an enormous list of 100+ actual sample college essays from 11 different schools. Finally, I'll break down two of these published college essay examples and explain why and how they work. With links to 177 full essays and essay excerpts , this article is a great resource for learning how to craft your own personal college admissions essay!

What Excellent College Essays Have in Common

Even though in many ways these sample college essays are very different from one other, they do share some traits you should try to emulate as you write your own essay.

Visible Signs of Planning

Building out from a narrow, concrete focus. You'll see a similar structure in many of the essays. The author starts with a very detailed story of an event or description of a person or place. After this sense-heavy imagery, the essay expands out to make a broader point about the author, and connects this very memorable experience to the author's present situation, state of mind, newfound understanding, or maturity level.

Knowing how to tell a story. Some of the experiences in these essays are one-of-a-kind. But most deal with the stuff of everyday life. What sets them apart is the way the author approaches the topic: analyzing it for drama and humor, for its moving qualities, for what it says about the author's world, and for how it connects to the author's emotional life.

Stellar Execution

A killer first sentence. You've heard it before, and you'll hear it again: you have to suck the reader in, and the best place to do that is the first sentence. Great first sentences are punchy. They are like cliffhangers, setting up an exciting scene or an unusual situation with an unclear conclusion, in order to make the reader want to know more. Don't take my word for it—check out these 22 first sentences from Stanford applicants and tell me you don't want to read the rest of those essays to find out what happens!

A lively, individual voice. Writing is for readers. In this case, your reader is an admissions officer who has read thousands of essays before yours and will read thousands after. Your goal? Don't bore your reader. Use interesting descriptions, stay away from clichés, include your own offbeat observations—anything that makes this essay sounds like you and not like anyone else.

Technical correctness. No spelling mistakes, no grammar weirdness, no syntax issues, no punctuation snafus—each of these sample college essays has been formatted and proofread perfectly. If this kind of exactness is not your strong suit, you're in luck! All colleges advise applicants to have their essays looked over several times by parents, teachers, mentors, and anyone else who can spot a comma splice. Your essay must be your own work, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting help polishing it.

And if you need more guidance, connect with PrepScholar's expert admissions consultants . These expert writers know exactly what college admissions committees look for in an admissions essay and chan help you craft an essay that boosts your chances of getting into your dream school.

Check out PrepScholar's Essay Editing and Coaching progra m for more details!

Want to write the perfect college application essay? Get professional help from PrepScholar.

Your dedicated PrepScholar Admissions counselor will craft your perfect college essay, from the ground up. We'll learn your background and interests, brainstorm essay topics, and walk you through the essay drafting process, step-by-step. At the end, you'll have a unique essay that you'll proudly submit to your top choice colleges.

Don't leave your college application to chance. Find out more about PrepScholar Admissions now :

Links to Full College Essay Examples

Some colleges publish a selection of their favorite accepted college essays that worked, and I've put together a selection of over 100 of these.

Common App Essay Samples

Please note that some of these college essay examples may be responding to prompts that are no longer in use. The current Common App prompts are as follows:

1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story. 2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? 3. Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome? 4. Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you? 5. Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others. 6. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

7. Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

Now, let's get to the good stuff: the list of 177 college essay examples responding to current and past Common App essay prompts. 

Connecticut college.

• 12 Common Application essays from the classes of 2022-2025

Hamilton College

• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2026
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2022
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2018
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2012
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2007

Johns Hopkins

These essays are answers to past prompts from either the Common Application or the Coalition Application (which Johns Hopkins used to accept).

• 1 Common Application or Coalition Application essay from the class of 2026
• 6 Common Application or Coalition Application essays from the class of 2025
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2024
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2023
• 7 Common Application of Universal Application essays from the class of 2022
• 5 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2021
• 7 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2020

Essay Examples Published by Other Websites

• 2 Common Application essays ( 1st essay , 2nd essay ) from applicants admitted to Columbia

Other Sample College Essays

Here is a collection of essays that are college-specific.

Babson College

• 4 essays (and 1 video response) on "Why Babson" from the class of 2020

Emory University

• 5 essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) from the class of 2020 along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on why the essays were exceptional
• 5 more recent essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on what made these essays stand out

University of Georgia

• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2019
• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2018
• 10 Harvard essays from 2023
• 10 Harvard essays from 2022
• 10 Harvard essays from 2021
• 10 Harvard essays from 2020
• 10 Harvard essays from 2019
• 10 Harvard essays from 2018
• 6 essays from admitted MIT students

Smith College

• 6 "best gift" essays from the class of 2018

Books of College Essays

If you're looking for even more sample college essays, consider purchasing a college essay book. The best of these include dozens of essays that worked and feedback from real admissions officers.

College Essays That Made a Difference —This detailed guide from Princeton Review includes not only successful essays, but also interviews with admissions officers and full student profiles.

50 Successful Harvard Application Essays by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson—A must for anyone aspiring to Harvard .

50 Successful Ivy League Application Essays and 50 Successful Stanford Application Essays by Gen and Kelly Tanabe—For essays from other top schools, check out this venerated series, which is regularly updated with new essays.

Heavenly Essays by Janine W. Robinson—This collection from the popular blogger behind Essay Hell includes a wider range of schools, as well as helpful tips on honing your own essay.

Analyzing Great Common App Essays That Worked

I've picked two essays from the examples collected above to examine in more depth so that you can see exactly what makes a successful college essay work. Full credit for these essays goes to the original authors and the schools that published them.

Example 1: "Breaking Into Cars," by Stephen, Johns Hopkins Class of '19 (Common App Essay, 636 words long)

I had never broken into a car before.

We were in Laredo, having just finished our first day at a Habitat for Humanity work site. The Hotchkiss volunteers had already left, off to enjoy some Texas BBQ, leaving me behind with the college kids to clean up. Not until we were stranded did we realize we were locked out of the van.

Someone picked a coat hanger out of the dumpster, handed it to me, and took a few steps back.

"Can you do that thing with a coat hanger to unlock it?"

"Why me?" I thought.

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame. Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally. My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed. "The water's on fire! Clear a hole!" he shouted, tossing me in the lake without warning. While I'm still unconvinced about that particular lesson's practicality, my Dad's overarching message is unequivocally true: much of life is unexpected, and you have to deal with the twists and turns.

Living in my family, days rarely unfolded as planned. A bit overlooked, a little pushed around, I learned to roll with reality, negotiate a quick deal, and give the improbable a try. I don't sweat the small stuff, and I definitely don't expect perfect fairness. So what if our dining room table only has six chairs for seven people? Someone learns the importance of punctuality every night.

But more than punctuality and a special affinity for musical chairs, my family life has taught me to thrive in situations over which I have no power. Growing up, I never controlled my older siblings, but I learned how to thwart their attempts to control me. I forged alliances, and realigned them as necessary. Sometimes, I was the poor, defenseless little brother; sometimes I was the omniscient elder. Different things to different people, as the situation demanded. I learned to adapt.

Back then, these techniques were merely reactions undertaken to ensure my survival. But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The question caught me off guard, much like the question posed to me in Laredo. Then, I realized I knew the answer. I knew why the coat hanger had been handed to me.

Growing up as the middle child in my family, I was a vital participant in a thing I did not govern, in the company of people I did not choose. It's family. It's society. And often, it's chaos. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, optimism, and preparedness. My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence.

What Makes This Essay Tick?

It's very helpful to take writing apart in order to see just how it accomplishes its objectives. Stephen's essay is very effective. Let's find out why!

An Opening Line That Draws You In

In just eight words, we get: scene-setting (he is standing next to a car about to break in), the idea of crossing a boundary (he is maybe about to do an illegal thing for the first time), and a cliffhanger (we are thinking: is he going to get caught? Is he headed for a life of crime? Is he about to be scared straight?).

Great, Detailed Opening Story

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame.

It's the details that really make this small experience come alive. Notice how whenever he can, Stephen uses a more specific, descriptive word in place of a more generic one. The volunteers aren't going to get food or dinner; they're going for "Texas BBQ." The coat hanger comes from "a dumpster." Stephen doesn't just move the coat hanger—he "jiggles" it.

Details also help us visualize the emotions of the people in the scene. The person who hands Stephen the coat hanger isn't just uncomfortable or nervous; he "takes a few steps back"—a description of movement that conveys feelings. Finally, the detail of actual speech makes the scene pop. Instead of writing that the other guy asked him to unlock the van, Stephen has the guy actually say his own words in a way that sounds like a teenager talking.

Turning a Specific Incident Into a Deeper Insight

Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

Stephen makes the locked car experience a meaningful illustration of how he has learned to be resourceful and ready for anything, and he also makes this turn from the specific to the broad through an elegant play on the two meanings of the word "click."

Using Concrete Examples When Making Abstract Claims

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally.

"Unpredictability and chaos" are very abstract, not easily visualized concepts. They could also mean any number of things—violence, abandonment, poverty, mental instability. By instantly following up with highly finite and unambiguous illustrations like "family of seven" and "siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing," Stephen grounds the abstraction in something that is easy to picture: a large, noisy family.

Using Small Bits of Humor and Casual Word Choice

My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed.

Obviously, knowing how to clean burning oil is not high on the list of things every 9-year-old needs to know. To emphasize this, Stephen uses sarcasm by bringing up a situation that is clearly over-the-top: "in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed."

The humor also feels relaxed. Part of this is because he introduces it with the colloquial phrase "you know," so it sounds like he is talking to us in person. This approach also diffuses the potential discomfort of the reader with his father's strictness—since he is making jokes about it, clearly he is OK. Notice, though, that this doesn't occur very much in the essay. This helps keep the tone meaningful and serious rather than flippant.

An Ending That Stretches the Insight Into the Future

But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The ending of the essay reveals that Stephen's life has been one long preparation for the future. He has emerged from chaos and his dad's approach to parenting as a person who can thrive in a world that he can't control.

This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. These are the qualities of successful college students, who will be able to navigate the independence college classes require and the responsibility and quasi-adulthood of college life.

What Could This Essay Do Even Better?

Even the best essays aren't perfect, and even the world's greatest writers will tell you that writing is never "finished"—just "due." So what would we tweak in this essay if we could?

Replace some of the clichéd language. Stephen uses handy phrases like "twists and turns" and "don't sweat the small stuff" as a kind of shorthand for explaining his relationship to chaos and unpredictability. But using too many of these ready-made expressions runs the risk of clouding out your own voice and replacing it with something expected and boring.

Use another example from recent life. Stephen's first example (breaking into the van in Laredo) is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people." It would be great to see how this plays out outside his family, either in the situation in Laredo or another context.

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Example 2: By Renner Kwittken, Tufts Class of '23 (Common App Essay, 645 words long)

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver. I saw it in my favorite book, Richard Scarry's "Cars and Trucks and Things That Go," and for some reason, I was absolutely obsessed with the idea of driving a giant pickle. Much to the discontent of my younger sister, I insisted that my parents read us that book as many nights as possible so we could find goldbug, a small little golden bug, on every page. I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Then I discovered a real goldbug: gold nanoparticles that can reprogram macrophages to assist in killing tumors, produce clear images of them without sacrificing the subject, and heat them to obliteration.

Suddenly the destination of my pickle was clear.

I quickly became enveloped by the world of nanomedicine; I scoured articles about liposomes, polymeric micelles, dendrimers, targeting ligands, and self-assembling nanoparticles, all conquering cancer in some exotic way. Completely absorbed, I set out to find a mentor to dive even deeper into these topics. After several rejections, I was immensely grateful to receive an invitation to work alongside Dr. Sangeeta Ray at Johns Hopkins.

In the lab, Dr. Ray encouraged a great amount of autonomy to design and implement my own procedures. I chose to attack a problem that affects the entire field of nanomedicine: nanoparticles consistently fail to translate from animal studies into clinical trials. Jumping off recent literature, I set out to see if a pre-dose of a common chemotherapeutic could enhance nanoparticle delivery in aggressive prostate cancer, creating three novel constructs based on three different linear polymers, each using fluorescent dye (although no gold, sorry goldbug!). Though using radioactive isotopes like Gallium and Yttrium would have been incredible, as a 17-year-old, I unfortunately wasn't allowed in the same room as these radioactive materials (even though I took a Geiger counter to a pair of shoes and found them to be slightly dangerous).

I hadn't expected my hypothesis to work, as the research project would have ideally been led across two full years. Yet while there are still many optimizations and revisions to be done, I was thrilled to find -- with completely new nanoparticles that may one day mean future trials will use particles with the initials "RK-1" -- thatcyclophosphamide did indeed increase nanoparticle delivery to the tumor in a statistically significant way.

A secondary, unexpected research project was living alone in Baltimore, a new city to me, surrounded by people much older than I. Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research. Whether in a presentation or in a casual conversation, making others interested in science is perhaps more exciting to me than the research itself. This solidified a new pursuit to angle my love for writing towards illuminating science in ways people can understand, adding value to a society that can certainly benefit from more scientific literacy.

It seems fitting that my goals are still transforming: in Scarry's book, there is not just one goldbug, there is one on every page. With each new experience, I'm learning that it isn't the goldbug itself, but rather the act of searching for the goldbugs that will encourage, shape, and refine my ever-evolving passions. Regardless of the goldbug I seek -- I know my pickle truck has just begun its journey.

Renner takes a somewhat different approach than Stephen, but their essay is just as detailed and engaging. Let's go through some of the strengths of this essay.

One Clear Governing Metaphor

This essay is ultimately about two things: Renner’s dreams and future career goals, and Renner’s philosophy on goal-setting and achieving one’s dreams.

But instead of listing off all the amazing things they’ve done to pursue their dream of working in nanomedicine, Renner tells a powerful, unique story instead. To set up the narrative, Renner opens the essay by connecting their experiences with goal-setting and dream-chasing all the way back to a memorable childhood experience:

This lighthearted–but relevant!--story about the moment when Renner first developed a passion for a specific career (“finding the goldbug”) provides an anchor point for the rest of the essay. As Renner pivots to describing their current dreams and goals–working in nanomedicine–the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” is reflected in Renner’s experiments, rejections, and new discoveries.

Though Renner tells multiple stories about their quest to “find the goldbug,” or, in other words, pursue their passion, each story is connected by a unifying theme; namely, that as we search and grow over time, our goals will transform…and that’s okay! By the end of the essay, Renner uses the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” to reiterate the relevance of the opening story:

While the earlier parts of the essay convey Renner’s core message by showing, the final, concluding paragraph sums up Renner’s insights by telling. By briefly and clearly stating the relevance of the goldbug metaphor to their own philosophy on goals and dreams, Renner demonstrates their creativity, insight, and eagerness to grow and evolve as the journey continues into college.

An Engaging, Individual Voice

This essay uses many techniques that make Renner sound genuine and make the reader feel like we already know them.

Technique #1: humor. Notice Renner's gentle and relaxed humor that lightly mocks their younger self's grand ambitions (this is different from the more sarcastic kind of humor used by Stephen in the first essay—you could never mistake one writer for the other).

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver.

I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Renner gives a great example of how to use humor to your advantage in college essays. You don’t want to come off as too self-deprecating or sarcastic, but telling a lightheartedly humorous story about your younger self that also showcases how you’ve grown and changed over time can set the right tone for your entire essay.

Technique #2: intentional, eye-catching structure. The second technique is the way Renner uses a unique structure to bolster the tone and themes of their essay . The structure of your essay can have a major impact on how your ideas come across…so it’s important to give it just as much thought as the content of your essay!

For instance, Renner does a great job of using one-line paragraphs to create dramatic emphasis and to make clear transitions from one phase of the story to the next:

Suddenly the destination of my pickle car was clear.

Not only does the one-liner above signal that Renner is moving into a new phase of the narrative (their nanoparticle research experiences), it also tells the reader that this is a big moment in Renner’s story. It’s clear that Renner made a major discovery that changed the course of their goal pursuit and dream-chasing. Through structure, Renner conveys excitement and entices the reader to keep pushing forward to the next part of the story.

Technique #3: playing with syntax. The third technique is to use sentences of varying length, syntax, and structure. Most of the essay's written in standard English and uses grammatically correct sentences. However, at key moments, Renner emphasizes that the reader needs to sit up and pay attention by switching to short, colloquial, differently punctuated, and sometimes fragmented sentences.

Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research.

In the examples above, Renner switches adeptly between long, flowing sentences and quippy, telegraphic ones. At the same time, Renner uses these different sentence lengths intentionally. As they describe their experiences in new places, they use longer sentences to immerse the reader in the sights, smells, and sounds of those experiences. And when it’s time to get a big, key idea across, Renner switches to a short, punchy sentence to stop the reader in their tracks.

The varying syntax and sentence lengths pull the reader into the narrative and set up crucial “aha” moments when it’s most important…which is a surefire way to make any college essay stand out.

Renner's essay is very strong, but there are still a few little things that could be improved.

Connecting the research experiences to the theme of “finding the goldbug.”  The essay begins and ends with Renner’s connection to the idea of “finding the goldbug.” And while this metaphor is deftly tied into the essay’s intro and conclusion, it isn’t entirely clear what Renner’s big findings were during the research experiences that are described in the middle of the essay. It would be great to add a sentence or two stating what Renner’s big takeaways (or “goldbugs”) were from these experiences, which add more cohesion to the essay as a whole.

Give more details about discovering the world of nanomedicine. It makes sense that Renner wants to get into the details of their big research experiences as quickly as possible. After all, these are the details that show Renner’s dedication to nanomedicine! But a smoother transition from the opening pickle car/goldbug story to Renner’s “real goldbug” of nanoparticles would help the reader understand why nanoparticles became Renner’s goldbug. Finding out why Renner is so motivated to study nanomedicine–and perhaps what put them on to this field of study–would help readers fully understand why Renner chose this path in the first place.

4 Essential Tips for Writing Your Own Essay

How can you use this discussion to better your own college essay? Here are some suggestions for ways to use this resource effectively.

#1: Get Help From the Experts

Getting your college applications together takes a lot of work and can be pretty intimidatin g. Essays are even more important than ever now that admissions processes are changing and schools are going test-optional and removing diversity standards thanks to new Supreme Court rulings .  If you want certified expert help that really makes a difference, get started with  PrepScholar’s Essay Editing and Coaching program. Our program can help you put together an incredible essay from idea to completion so that your application stands out from the crowd. We've helped students get into the best colleges in the United States, including Harvard, Stanford, and Yale.  If you're ready to take the next step and boost your odds of getting into your dream school, connect with our experts today .

#2: Read Other Essays to Get Ideas for Your Own

As you go through the essays we've compiled for you above, ask yourself the following questions:

• Can you explain to yourself (or someone else!) why the opening sentence works well?
• Look for the essay's detailed personal anecdote. What senses is the author describing? Can you easily picture the scene in your mind's eye?
• Find the place where this anecdote bridges into a larger insight about the author. How does the essay connect the two? How does the anecdote work as an example of the author's characteristic, trait, or skill?
• Check out the essay's tone. If it's funny, can you find the places where the humor comes from? If it's sad and moving, can you find the imagery and description of feelings that make you moved? If it's serious, can you see how word choice adds to this tone?

Make a note whenever you find an essay or part of an essay that you think was particularly well-written, and think about what you like about it . Is it funny? Does it help you really get to know the writer? Does it show what makes the writer unique? Once you have your list, keep it next to you while writing your essay to remind yourself to try and use those same techniques in your own essay.

#3: Find Your "A-Ha!" Moment

All of these essays rely on connecting with the reader through a heartfelt, highly descriptive scene from the author's life. It can either be very dramatic (did you survive a plane crash?) or it can be completely mundane (did you finally beat your dad at Scrabble?). Either way, it should be personal and revealing about you, your personality, and the way you are now that you are entering the adult world.

Check out essays by authors like John Jeremiah Sullivan , Leslie Jamison , Hanif Abdurraqib , and Esmé Weijun Wang to get more examples of how to craft a compelling personal narrative.

#4: Start Early, Revise Often

Let me level with you: the best writing isn't writing at all. It's rewriting. And in order to have time to rewrite, you have to start way before the application deadline. My advice is to write your first draft at least two months before your applications are due.

Let it sit for a few days untouched. Then come back to it with fresh eyes and think critically about what you've written. What's extra? What's missing? What is in the wrong place? What doesn't make sense? Don't be afraid to take it apart and rearrange sections. Do this several times over, and your essay will be much better for it!

For more editing tips, check out a style guide like Dreyer's English or Eats, Shoots & Leaves .

What's Next?

Still not sure which colleges you want to apply to? Our experts will show you how to make a college list that will help you choose a college that's right for you.

Interested in learning more about college essays? Check out our detailed breakdown of exactly how personal statements work in an application , some suggestions on what to avoid when writing your essay , and our guide to writing about your extracurricular activities .

Working on the rest of your application? Read what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying .

Want to improve your SAT score by 160 points or your ACT score by 4 points? We've written a guide for each test about the top 5 strategies you must be using to have a shot at improving your score. Download it for free now:

The recommendations in this post are based solely on our knowledge and experience. If you purchase an item through one of our links PrepScholar may receive a commission.

Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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