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The Love Hypothesis Quotes

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The Love Hypothesis Quotes That Will Tug on Your Heartstrings

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The realm of romance novels has been shaken by a sensational entrant. Ali Hazelwood's The Love Hypothesis stepped onto the scene and rapidly captured the hearts of readers around the globe. Amongst its many charms, the quotes from this novel have resonated deeply, echoing themes of love, science, and the complexity of human relationships. As we delve into the memorable The Love Hypothesis quotes , we not only celebrate a literary treasure but also explore the profound impact that a well-crafted phrase can have on its audience.

In this comprehensive guide, we'll unveil the most poignant and stirring quotes from The Love Hypothesis . We aim to not only spotlight these gems but to also provide the context that makes them shimmer with meaning. With calculated precision to optimize for today's ever-evolving SEO landscape, let's explore the quotes that have enthralled so many readers, each one a catalyst for reflection, inspiration, and perhaps even personal revelation.

Exploring the Charm of The Love Hypothesis

Ali Hazelwood’s debut novel, The Love Hypothesis , has not only enchanted readers with its vibrant characters and witty narrative but also with its treasury of quotes that are as insightful as they are endearing. Set against the backdrop of the academic world, The Love Hypothesis weaves a tale of fake relationships turning into something unexpectedly genuine. Yet, it's the quotes that carry the essence of the novel, capturing fundamental human emotions and intellectual ponderings with elegance and relatability.

The Intersection of Love and Science

One of the central charms of Hazelwood's work is how it seamlessly blends the rigors of scientific inquiry with the vulnerability of love. The protagonist, Olive Smith, a Ph.D. student, approaches her personal conundrum with the same analytical mindset she applies to her lab work. The following quotes reflect this intriguing fusion:

• "Love is not a science, but it's still something worth studying."
• "Statistically speaking, I should be over him by now."

These lines highlight the juxtaposition of intellect and emotion that defines the unique flavor of the book. Through them, Hazelwood invites readers to ponder on the unpredictable nature of love and the futility yet necessity of trying to understand it.

Dissecting the Heart's Hypotheses

In The Love Hypothesis , Olive attempts to formulate theories to explain her evolving feelings, much like how a scientist generates hypotheses to interpret data. Both humorous and heartwarming, these quotes unveil the core of the human experience – to make sense of the senseless:

• " Experimentation is the step that comes after a hypothesis is formed. "
• "I don't need an algorithm to tell me how I feel, but sometimes I wish I had one."

Romantic Quips and Witty Banter

A significant source of the novel's appeal rests in its deliciously crafted dialogues — revealing quotes about achievement that sparkle with wit and romantic tension. Olive and Adam, her love interest, are at their best when their exchanges combine sarcasm, humor, and a touch of the unsaid feelings simmering beneath the surface.

• "I might be a scientist, but I'm not blind to chemistry when it's right in front of me."
• "My success rate with hypotheses in the lab might be high, but in love? Clearly, I need more data."

These snappy comebacks and clever retorts, illustrating their growing connection, will likely have readers laughing and sighing in equal measure.

Quotes That Inspire Empathy and Identification

The Love Hypothesis shines in its ability to make readers see parts of themselves in the characters, especially Olive. Below are quotes that encourage self-recognition and empathy:

• " In the grand equation of the universe, my feelings are a variable that’s not worth solving for. "
• "You might think you're an outlier, but maybe you just haven't found the right data set."

These reflections serve not only thank you message to retiring teacher develop Olive's character but also to speak to the reader’s own uncertainties and introspections about love and self-worth.

The Evolution of Romance: An In-Depth Analysis

In The Love Hypothesis , readers are treated to a modern tale of romance that refuses to follow worn-out tropes. Through Olive and Adam’s relationship evolution, mindfulness quotes for well-being drawn from the narrative serve as signposts of their journey from skepticism to a partnership that defies the odds.

From Academic Accomplices to Lovers

The progression from Olive and Adam's pragmatic arrangement to genuine affection is marked by pivotal quotes that trace the evolution of their characters':

• "He was an unexpected variable in my well-controlled life."
• "This hypothesis is becoming a theory — one that I’m more convinced of every day."

As the characters' relationship grows, readers find themselves invested in their story, propelled forward by each significant moment they share.

The Quotes That Define Their Bond

Key quotes from The Love Hypothesis offer insight into the dynamic between Olive and Adam, providing readers with the language to articulate the intricacies of modern love:

• " If my heart had a hypothesis, it would be that I'm falling for you. "
• "You're the proof to my theorem. Without you, it all falls apart."

Through these select phrases, the duo's connection is dissected and displayed, allowing those following their narrative to savor each stage of their romantic development.

Charting the Emotional Graph: Love and Loss

Within the ebbs and flows of The Love Hypothesis , the impact of love's trials and tribulations are depicted through quotes that stand out for their emotional depth and resonance.

When the Heart's Framework is Tested

Olive's challenges in reconciling her emotions delve into the heartache and risk that accompanies love. The characters endure trials that test their resolve and commitment, reflected in the following quotes :

• "He was an outlier in my life, the kind you keep even when they don't fit the curve."
• "If love is a variable, then loss is the constant that balances it."

The novel doesn't shy away from the pain inherent in relationships, wielding Olive's voice to articulate this timeless human experience.

Quotes Reflecting Love's Tenacity

Despite the struggles, The Love Hypothesis also affirms the enduring power of love through quotes that underscore its tenacity:

• "Our results might be inconclusive, but I'm willing to keep testing the hypothesis."
• "Like gravity, love seems to be a force with its own laws, and I've fallen into its orbit."

These poignant phrases encapsulate the strength and persistence required to nurture a love that can withstand adversity.

Synthesizing the Quotable Insights

What truly elevates the quotes in The Love Hypothesis is their ability to distill complex feelings into statements that resonate universally. Just as scientists compile their findings, it's useful to compile these quotes for easy reference and reflection, encapsulating various aspects of love and life.

A Compilation of Memorable Quotes

Below is a sample list of quotes extracted from the book, presented in a way that demonstrates their significance and place within the novel's theme and context:

• "Even the best hypotheses need revision when new data comes to light."
• "Being logical doesn't mean ignoring the existence of absurdity—sometimes, it just means embracing it."
• "In life, as in science, sometimes you have to admit that your initial assumptions were wrong."

Each quote functions as a window into the soul of the novel, providing readers with snapshots of wisdom and wit that echo beyond the pages.

The Impactful Takeaways

By examining these quotes , it becomes evident that love—much like science—requires a blend of empirical evidence and instinctual faith. Olive and Adam's story is marked by such revelations:

• "Certain elements, when combined, just have a natural affinity—like us."
• "In a world of variables, being someone's constant can be the most romantic promise of all."

In distilling the essence of The Love Hypothesis through its quotes , we gain insight into the delicate dance between knowledge and emotion, between logic and love.

Unpacking the Narrative Alchemy

The Love Hypothesis employs its narrative to blend humor, intelligence, and romance in a formula that appeals to a wide audience. The quotes sprinkled throughout the novel serve as potent reminders of how even the most calculated lives can be undone and beautifully remade by love.

The Intellectual Allure of Romance

The novel challenges the notion that intelligence and romance are mutually exclusive, offering quotes that perfectly embody this bridge:

• "Our laughter is my favorite chemical reaction."
• "Hearts aren't like chemical substances, you can't take them apart and analyze them. So maybe it's time to stop trying."

In supporting the story's romantic thesis, these quotes celebrate the merging of intelligence and passion, inviting readers to contemplate a love that is as smart as it is heartfelt.

Pearls of Wisdom from the Protagonists' Journey

Employing a comparison chart, let's explore key quotes and the core themes they represent, illustrating how love unfolds through scientific metaphor and heartfelt truths:

Through this chart, we encapsulate the essential messages conveyed by these quotes , further emphasizing their significance within the novel's narrative structure.

Conclusion: Beyond the Lab – Love's Universal Formula

The Love Hypothesis has achieved something exceptional in literature—transforming the abstract notions of love and attraction into a relatable and intellectual journey. The quotes extracted from the novel do more than add delight; they solidify the book's place as a modern classic of romance, filled with laughter, vulnerability, and the spirited pursuit of the heart's greatest experiment.

To readers and lovers of words alike, Ali Hazelwood's debut offers a treasure trove of poignant quotes that will continue to inspire and charm far beyond its final pages. As we close the chapter on our examination of these quotes, it's clear that sometimes, the most profound truths emerge from the exploration of the simplest hypotheses—those rooted in the heart.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

What is 'the love hypothesis'.

'The Love Hypothesis' is a romance novel written by Ali Hazelwood. It follows the story of Olive Smith, a brilliant physics professor, and Adam Carlsen, a cocky graduate student. The book explores their hilarious and heartfelt journey of love and academic pursuits.

Who are the main characters in 'The Love Hypothesis'?

The main characters in 'The Love Hypothesis' are Olive Smith and Adam Carlsen. Olive is a brilliant and determined physics professor, while Adam is a charismatic and cocky graduate student.

What are some memorable quotes from 'The Love Hypothesis'?

Here are a few quotes from 'The Love Hypothesis' that will tug on your heartstrings: 1. 'Sometimes, you find something you didn't know you were looking for until it hits you in the face.' 2. 'Love is like gravity—it pulls you toward the things that are meant to be yours.' 3. 'In love, sometimes, the biggest risk is not taking any risks at all.'

Is 'The Love Hypothesis' a standalone novel?

Yes, 'The Love Hypothesis' is a standalone novel. It tells a complete story within one book and does not have any direct sequels or prequels.

Where can I get a copy of 'The Love Hypothesis'?

You can purchase a copy of 'The Love Hypothesis' from various bookstores, both online and offline. It is available in paperback, hardcover, and e-book formats.

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30 Best The Love Hypothesis Quotes With Image

1. Love is not purely based on physical attraction: The Love Hypothesis explores the idea that love is more than just a superficial connection. It emphasizes the importance of emotional connection, shared interests, and genuine understanding between two individuals, rather than solely focusing on physical appearance.

2. Love requires vulnerability: The book teaches us that love involves taking risks and being vulnerable. Both the main characters, Olive and Adam, have their own insecurities and fears, but they learn to open up to each other and embrace vulnerability for the sake of their relationship.

3. Love can come from unexpected places: The Love Hypothesis challenges the notion of love being limited to certain types of people or relationships. Sometimes, love can come from unexpected sources, and it is important to remain open-minded and receptive to different possibilities.

4. Communication is essential in a relationship: Throughout the story, we witness the importance of clear and open communication between Olive and Adam. They learn to express their feelings, fears, and desires, leading to a stronger bond and a deeper understanding of each other.

5. Love takes time and effort: The Love Hypothesis highlights that love is not an instant or effortless process. It requires time, patience, and effort from both individuals involved. It showcases the ups and downs of a relationship, emphasizing the need for commitment and perseverance to make love work.

Introduction

5 key lessons from the love hypothesis, 30 best the love hypothesis quotes, related quotes.

The Love Hypothesis Quotes | Ali Hazelwood | Scribble Whatever

The best quotes by the author we have brought to you.

A good kiss will do that: make a girl forget herself for a while. Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

A heart will break even more easily than the weakest of hydrogen bonds. Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

Academia takes a lot from you and gives back very little. It’s hard to stick around without a good reason to do so. Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

Academia was very much an old boys’ club, where those who held the power liked to take advantage of those who didn’t without repercussions. Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“And then I’ll come find you, and I’ll take care of you.” – Adam” (The Love Hypothesis Quotes) Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

Approximately two out of three fake-dating situations will eventually involve room-sharing; 50 percent of room-sharing situations will be further complicated by the presence of only one bed. Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“Because I’m starting to wonder if this is what being in love is. Being okay with ripping yourself to shreds, so the other person can stay whole.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

 “Being okay with ripping yourself to shreds, so the other person can stay whole.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“But a good kiss will do that: make a girl forget herself for a while.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“Carry yourself with the confidence of a mediocre white man.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

 “Everyone likes tall, broody, sullen hunks with genius IQs.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“Expiration dates are for the weak.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“He opened his mouth, and then closed it. And then opened it again. You kissed that mouth, Olive. And it was a good kiss.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“He’d clearly never seen a rom-com or read a romance novel in his life.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“Her heart may be broken, but her brain was doing just fine.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“I am going to take care of this,” he told her. There was something determined, earnest in his eyes. Olive had never felt safer, or more loved. “And then I’ll come find you, and I’ll take care of you.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“I know it’s scary, being vulnerable, but you can allow yourself to care. You can want to be with people as more than just friends or casual acquaintances.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“I must say, the line between excellent career choice and critical life screwup is getting a bit blury.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“I wish you could see yourself the way I see you” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“I’m going to kill you,” he gritted out, little more than a growl. “If you say another word about the woman I love, if you look at her, if you even think about her – I’m going to f*cking kill you.” (The Love Hypothesis Quotes) Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“If you say another word about the woman I love, He’d clearly never seen a rom-com or read a romance novel in his life.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“I’m starting to wonder if this is what being in love is. Being okay with ripping yourself to shreds, so the other person can stay whole.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

In academia every position above the graduate student level required some degree of assness in order to be held for any length of time, with tenured faculty at the very peak of the ass pyramid. Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“It wasn’t until a few minutes later, when she was sitting on her bed staring at the Boston skyline and chewing on her lunch, that Olive realized that the protein bar Adam had given her was covered in chocolate.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“I’ve never been surer of anything. Except maybe cell theory.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

Not everyone has what it takes to be a scientist, and those who don’t should be weeded out.  Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“Not having a life came in handy, sometimes.”  Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“Olive had felt that he was on her side. Over & over, & in ways that could never have anticipated, he had made her feel unjudged.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“Only child of financially rich but emotionally poor parents. I could do whatever I wanted but had no one to do it with.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“Or, you could stay mad, and we could go to your lab and throw test tubes full of toxic reagents at each other until the pain of third-degree burns overrides your shitty mood? Sounds like fun, no?” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“She would have loved to run to the edge of campus and scream into the void until modern civilization collapsed, but that wasn’t exactly a pressing matter.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

That’s the thing with science. We’re drilled to believe that false positives are bad, but false negatives are just as terrifying. Not being able to see something, even if it’s in front of your eyes. Purposefully making yourself blind, just because you’re afraid of seeing too much. Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“There’s nothing bad about taking more than five years to graduate,” he offered in a conciliatory tone.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“This might be inappropriate but… Olive. You are really… You are extraordinary” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

Virginity is not a continuous variable, it’s categorical. Binary. Nominal. Dichotomous. Ordinal, potentially. Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“You can fall in love: someone will catch you.” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

“You kiss him and next thing you know he’s saving your ass and he’s buying you scones and calling you a smart-ass in a weirdly affectionate tone” Ali Hazelwood The Love Hypothesis

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Ali Hazelwood Quotes

Best 19 the love hypothesis quotes by ali hazelwood, the love hypothesis quotes.

“A good kiss will do that: make a girl forget herself for a while.”

“A heart will break even more easily than the weakest of hydrogen bonds.”

“Carry yourself with the confidence of a mediocre white man.”

“Everyone likes tall, broody, sullen hunks with genius IQs.”

“Expiration dates are for the weak.”

“False negatives are bad, too.”

“Her heart may be broken, but her brain was doing just fine.”

“How much do you hate this, on a scale from one to ‘correlation equals causation’?”

“Hypothesis: If I fall in love, things will invariably end poorly.”

“Hypothesis: The more I mention an attachment in an email, the less likely I will be to actually include said attachment.”

“Hypothesis: When given a choice between A (a slightly inconveniencing situation) and B (a colossal sh*tshow with devastating consequences), I will inevitably end up selecting B.”

“I do reserve the right to comment on your abysmal taste in men.”

“I have access to your Google Calendar, *sshole. You're not busy. If you don't want to hang out with me, you can just be honest.”

“I think that somewhere along the way I forgot that I was something. I forgot myself.”

“I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.”

“I'm starting to wonder if this is what being in love is. Being okay with ripping yourself to shreds, so the other person can stay whole.”

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“You can fall in love: someone will catch you.”

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The Love Hypothesis

Quick recap & summary by chapter.

The Quick Recap and Chapter-by-Chapter Summary for The Love Hypothesis by Ali Hazelwood are below.

Quick(-ish) Recap

Three years prior, Olive Smith talks to a guy when she's in the bathroom fixing her contacts (and can't see) after her Ph.D. candidate interview. She tells him about her passion for her research. She doesn't catch his name but remembers the conversation distinctly and wonders about the guy she met.

In present day, Olive is a biology Ph.D. student researching early detection methods for pancreatic cancer. She kisses a guy randomly in order to trick her best friend into thinking she's dating someone (so that her best friend Anh won't feel bad about dating Olive's ex). That guy turns out to be Dr. Adam Carlson , a young, handsome and highly-respected tenured faculty member in her department. He's also known for being hypercritical and moody.

Meanwhile, Adam's department chair is worried that he's planning on leaving for another university and has frozen some of his research funds. So, Adam he agrees to pretend to be in a relationship with Olive in order to give the impression he's putting down "roots" here, in hopes they will unfreeze the funds.

As Olive and Adam fake-date, they get to know each other. Olive sees that Adam is demanding and blunt towards his students, but not unkind or mean. Olive confides in him about her mother getting pancreatic cancer, which is why she's doing her research.

Olive soon realizes that she has feelings for Adam, but she's afraid to tell him. When he overhears her talking about a crush, she pretends it's about someone else. Olive also hears someone else refer to a woman Adam's been pining after for years and is surprised at how jealous she feels.

In the meantime, Olive needs more lab space and has been talking to Dr. Tom Benton for a spot at his lab at Harvard. When Tom arrives in town, it turns out he's friends with Adam. Adam and Tom are friends from grad school, and they have recently gotten a large grant for some joint research that Adam is excited about. After Olive completes a report on her research for Tom, he offers her a spot in his lab for the next year.

Olive and Adam's relationship continues to progress until they attend a science conference in Boston. Olive's research has been selected for a panel presentation, while Adam is a keynote speaker. There, Olive is sexually harassed by Tom, who makes advances on her. When she rejects him, he accuses her of someone who sleeps around to get ahead. He also says that he'll deny it if she tells anyone and that they won't believe her.

While Olive does finally sleep with Adam at the conference, she soon tearfully breaks things off since she doesn't want to complicate things with Adam's joint research project with Tom. Adam is also in the process of applying for a spot at Harvard.

Olive is certain no one will believe her about Tom until she realizes that the accidentally recorded the conversation where he made advances and threatened her. Meanwhile, Olive's roommate Malcolm has started seeing Dr. Holden Rodriguez, a faculty member who is a childhood friend of Adam's. Olive and Malcolm turn to Holden for advice, who encourages them to tell Adam about the recording. He points out that he thinks the main reason that Adam is considering a move to Harvard is because Olive is supposed to be going there.

Olive finds Adam and shows him the video. He is incensed at Tom and reports it to their faculty. When Adam returns from Boston, he reports that Tom has been fired. Meanwhile, Olive has been reaching out to other cancer researchers for spots at other labs, and she's gotten promising responses. Olive tells Adam that she loves him and that she never liked anyone else. Adam admits that he remembered her from the day he met her in the bathroom and that she's the one he's been interested in for years.

Ten months later at the anniversary of their first kiss, Olive and Adam re-create the kiss to mark their anniversary.

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Chapter-by-Chapter Summary

Olive Smith is an applicant for Stanford’s biology Ph.D program. After the interview with Dr. Aysegul Aslan , she ends up in a bathroom nearby unable to see and trying to wash out her eyes because she put in expired contacts.

She meets “The Guy” there, who she assumes is a Ph.D student there. As they strike up a conversation, she tells him that her name is Olive and talks about why she’s applying to the program. She tells him that she wants to do it in order to research a specific topic.

A few weeks later, Olive is accepted into the program.

Years later, Olive is now 26 and a Ph.D. student in Dr. Aslan’s lab. Olive has just kissed a random stranger (in order to trick her best friend, Anh , into thinking she’s on a date) — only to realize that the “stranger” is actually Dr. Adam Carlson , a 34-year-old tenured and highly-respected professor in her program with a reputation for being notorious moody, mean and hypercritical.

After they pull away, Adam accuses her of assaulting him. Olive insists she asked him and he said yes, but he says he merely snorted. Finally, she explains that her friend Anh had hit it off with a guy she’d been dating, Jeremy. Olive broke things off with Jeremy, but Anh felt too bad to go out with Jeremy. To make Anh feel better about it, Olive lied to Anh about dating someone and being on a date tonight. When Anh showed up at the lab, Olive needed to kiss someone so Anh would believe she was on a date.

Finally, Olive apologizes and leaves. She doesn’t notice that Adam had called her by her name (which she hadn’t brought up in this conversation).

A few days later, Olive is still embarrassed by what happened. However, she figures that she’d never crossed paths with Adam before then, so perhaps she wouldn’t cross paths with him again. Meanwhile, Olive is preoccupied with needing to find more lab space for her research on early detection of pancreatic cancer. Today, she also finds out Tom Benton , a well-known cancer researcher and an associate professor at Harvard, is interested in potentially allowing her to carry out her research at his lab at Harvard. He’s going to be in town in two weeks and wants to meet with her.

When Anh sees her, she confronts Olive about kissing Adam Carlson. Olive thinks back to how they met since they were the only two non-cis-white-male students in their class. Beyond that, Anh was her biggest support and best friend.

Today, Anh demands to know why Olive is dating Dr. Carlson. This conversation is interrupted when Adam walks in. He plays along and pretends that he and Olive are together. After they make formal introductions, he tells her to call him Adam, in case her friend Anh is around. Later, when Olive talks to Anh again, Olive continues to pretend she’s dating Adam, and she once again encourages Anh to date Jeremy.

On campus, Olive starts to notice that people are treating her differently and with some level of curiosity. When her roommate, Malcom , demands to know why she didn’t tell him about dating Dr. Carlson, Olive realize that everyone know about her lie. Olive goes to Adam’s lab to tell him what’s going on, and she apologizes to him for it.

Olive notes that he seems very at ease with everyone believing that they’re dating, and she wonders why. Finally, he admits that Stanford considers him to be a “flight risk” (that he wants to leave them for another institution) and that they’ve frozen some of his research funds because of it. Part of the issue is that he’s recently gotten a large grant with one of his collaborator’s at another institution, and the department is worried he’s planning on moving there. He hopes that the dating rumors will make them think he’s more likely to stick around since he’s dating someone here.

A few days later, Olive goes to Adam’s office and tells him she wants to proceed with pretending that they’re dating. Olive notices that she’s been treated much better by everyone since the rumor started. (Apart from Malcom, who dislikes Adam Carlson, and has been shunning her.) Adam explains that he’s looked into it and there’s no issue with it, though he can’t serve in any supervisory capacity for her or serve on her thesis committee or be a part of any decisions if she’s nominated for a fellowship or other awards.

They decide to set some ground rules for their fake-dating arrangement. They decide to be fake-dating while on-campus only, so no personal engagements. Olive stipulates that there’ll be no sex. They also agree not to date others in the interim, since it will make things messy. And they agree that they should get coffee or something regularly to make things believable.

They plan to continue their fake-dating until September 29, roughly a month from now, which is the day after the department’s budget review. Their first coffee “date” is planned for Wednesday at 10 AM.

Later, Olive talks to Malcom, who is still upset with her. Malcom comes from a long line of well-known scientists, and he dislikes that Adam Carlson’s criticism of his research had made his life so difficult. Olive confides in Malcom that they’re merely fake-dating and that she barely knows Adam. She says that he’s just helping her out with the Anh/Jeremy situation (and she doesn’t mention Adam’s reasons for participating).

On Wednesday, Olive and Adam have their first fake-date at the coffee house. They ask each other some basic questions, and Adam pays for her order.

The next week, they meet up again, though Olive is running late since she was getting ready for a meeting she has with Tom Benton later that day. Meanwhile, Adam is a little moody because his department chair has still not agreed to release his research funds. They discuss attending the fall biosciences picnic together so that his department chair can see that they’re together.

They’re interrupted when a friend of Adam’s walks in and greets him warmly. Adam introduces the man to Olive as his friend and collaborator — who turns out to be Tom Benton.

Dr. Benton reveals that he’s heard about Adam’s romantic exploits all the way at Harvard, and he’s surprised to hear the rumors about Adam’s new girlfriend being true. Olive also awkwardly tells Dr. Benton that they have a meeting planned for later that day. Tom is delighted to find out that his meeting is with Adam’s new girlfriend.

The three of them sit down to chat. As Tom asks her about her research, Adam rephrases it to help Olive organize her thoughts when he sees that she’s struggling to come up with an answer. Olive then tells Tom about her research on biomarkers in order to more easily and cheaply diagnose pancreatic cancer. As Tom inquires about her reasons for doing her research, Olive reluctantly admits that it’s because her mother had pancreatic cancer.

Finally, Tom asks Olive to spend two weeks writing up a report on the current state of her research. He says that he’ll make a determination of whether to give her the lab space and cover her research expenses depending on what he reads in that report.

When Tom steps away, Olive and Adam discuss that if she decides to go to Harvard then she needs to keep it a secret until the end of their arrangement, otherwise it’ll make Adam look worse. They also agree not to tell Tom that they’re only fake-dating.

The next day, Olive attends a well-attended talk that Tom is giving on campus. The auditorium is so packed that there’s no space anywhere. Anh convinces Olive to sit in Adam’s lap for the duration of the talk.

Afterwards, Olive and Anh head back to the biology building. Olive talks about the report she’s preparing for Tom and the presentation she needs to work on for a conference (the “SBD Conference”) coming up in Boston. Meanwhile, Anh is working on organizing an outreach event for BIPOC women in STEM for the conference.

As they walk back, they see that there’s a traffic jam involving a stopped car blocking an exit. Then they see Cherie , the department secretary, talking to Adam. Adam then proceeds to physically push a car out of the way to relieve the jam. Anh encourages Olive to go over and give him a kiss for his efforts. After some awkward negotiation with Adam, they kiss.

Olive is working on her report for Tom when Greg Cohen , one of Dr. Aslan’s other Ph.D. candidates, barges in, clearly agitated. Chase , another one of their lab mates, walks in uneasily after him. When Olive asks Greg what’s wrong, he angrily responds that Carlson is on his dissertation committee and he failed his proposal. They ask Olive whether she knew he was going to fail Greg, and Olive insists she didn’t know. Greg then yells at Olive and calls her selfish for not caring how Adam makes everyone’s lives miserable. Greg then storms off.

Later that day, Olive texts Adam. She asks him about failing Greg. She argues that he should be nicer, but Adam is unapologetic. He insists that his job is to make sure that students produce useful research. Olive gets frustrated texts profanity at him, and he doesn’t respond.

A few days later, Olive is on her way to the biosciences picnic, where she’ll be seeing Adam after their tense exchange. She, Anh, Jeremy and Malcom go together and are quite late. When they arrive, they see Adam playing Ultimate Frisbee shirtless, showing off his six-pack. Olive is surprised to find herself “viscerally attracted” to Adam.

As they put on sunscreen, Anh gives Olive way too much sunscreen. Meanwhile, the frisbee from the game lands near her. When Adam comes over to retrieve the frisbee, Anh offers Olive’s excess sunscreen to Adam. He accepts, and Olive rubs the sunscreen on him. Olive also apologizes for what she texted him the other day.

Tom then comes over and brings up that Adam will be going to Boston soon for a few days.

Olive is in the break room at night when she runs into Adam next. Olive is working on her report for Tom, but there’s a section she’s having trouble with since her lab equipment seems to be messing up. They chat and share snacks. Olive finds herself wondering why he’s single.

Olive also finds herself telling him about her mother and her death. She describes how, when she was 15, her mother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer too late and only had a few weeks left to live by then. Olive also says that her father was never in the picture and her grandparents were deceased, so she was sent into the foster system until she was emancipated at 16.

When she mentions needing to get back to work, Adam offers to let her use his lab equipment if she needs it. He also gives her some advice on the Western blot she’s working with to make sure she’s doing it correctly. Before Olive leaves, she asks Adam why he’s single, but before he can really answer, Jeremy walks in and interrupts them.

On Saturday, Olive sends in her report to Tom. He responds by asking her to meet to talk about it at Adam’s house (where he’s staying) on Tuesday before he leaves for Boston. At Adam’s house, she and Tom chat about her report for about 20 minutes. Before she leaves, Tom offers her a spot at Harvard for the next year, and Olive is thrilled.

Adam gives her a ride back to campus. He talks about how excited he is about the research he and Tom are working on. As they chat, Adam says something that The Guy she’d met in the bathroom all those years ago had said to her. Olive realizes then that Adam was The Guy she’d met. She marvels at how she’d wondered about The Guy for years. Olive then suggests that go celebrate her lab spot and him and Tom’s grant.

They agree to get coffee. Before then, she convinces him to go with her to get flu shots at the setup on campus, all the while she teases him for his fear of needles.

On Wednesday, Olive and Adam are texting and teasing each other when Anh comes in and comments on how in love with Adam she is. Anh says that she feels better about dating Jeremy, since she sees how much Olive likes Adam. As Anh leaves, it dawns on Olive that Anh is right.

Olive soon texts Malcolm asking to talk. When they get together, she tells him about how she thinks she’s fallen for Adam. She also tells him that she thinks that Adam was The Guy that she met all those years ago. Malcolm suggests that perhaps Adam feels the same way. Olive doesn’t think that’s the case, but moreover, she says scared of being vulnerable and possibly giving up the friendship she and Adam currently have if she’s wrong. Olive also says that everyone she cares about ends up leaving her — citing her mother, father and grandparents.

Olive says she’s certain she doesn’t want to say anything to Adam about her feelings — but then she turns around and sees Adam standing there.

When Adam acknowledges that he overheard her, Olive quickly lies and said she was talking about some other guy she has a crush on. Their conversation is interrupted by Dr. Holden Rodriguez , who is going to Boston with Tom and Adam. Dr. Rodriguez knows Olive since he was on her graduate advisory committee her first year.

As they talk, Holden explains that he and Adam are old friends. They grew up together because their parents were all diplomats. Holden tells Olive about how his boyfriend dumped him just before prom, so Adam went as his date instead.

After Holden leaves, Adam comments that Holden speaks highly of Olive and her research. Adam also explains a comment Holden made about Tom, saying that the two don’t really get along. He then tells Olive that she should just tell Jeremy how she feels, incorrectly assuming that the mystery crush Olive was referring to is Jeremy.

Malcolm continues trying to convince Olive to admit her feelings to Adam, but Olive refuses. With Adam out of town, she feels his absence. When Adam finally texts her on Sunday, she feels even worse about her stupid lie about liking someone else.

On campus, she runs into Holden, who mentions how glad he is that Adam and Olive got together. Holden days that Adam had talked about someone he wanted to ask out for years, and he’s glad Adam finally did it. When he says that, Olive thinks about how there must be someone else out there that Adam likes, then, since they only really met a couple weeks ago.

Holden also warns her to watch out when it comes to Tom and to watch Adam’s back, since he doesn’t trust Tom.

A little later, Olive is informed that her research has been accepted for the SBD conference as a panel presentation with faculty. Olive feels overwhelmed, since graduate students very rarely are selected for oral presentations. She goes to her advisor, Dr. Aslan, and explains that she’s terrible at talking. Of course, Dr. Aslan just gives her some encouragement and tells Olive she’ll help her practice her presentation.

Afterwards, Olive tells Malcom and Anh, who also volunteer to help her practice. They also mention, however, that they each got invited to stay with people in Boston for the conference (Anh with Jeremy and Malcolm with some friends who had a spare room), so they won’t be rooming with Olive. Anh says she figured Olive would stay with Adam.

Olive is trying to sort out some living arrangements for Boston when Adam, who is back in town now, comes up to her. She tells him about having trouble finding accommodations in Boston. Adam comments that there’s probably not anything left in the vicinity by now, but she could stay in his room at the conference center. He adds that he has the room for the whole conference, but he will only be using the room two nights, so they’ll only overlap for one night most likely.

When she tells him about her presentation, he offers to look over her slides. She also invites him to her talk, and she thinks about how one of the reasons she likes him is that she always feels like he’s on her side.

At the hotel in Boston, Olive takes the empty bed, and she rehearses the talk she’s about to give in a few hours. When Adam arrives, she thanks him for all the help he gave regarding her presentation.

He asks when her presentation is so he can attend, but it turns out it overlaps with the Keynote speech, which he is giving along with two other people. She offers to show him the recording of it afterwards.

When Olive goes to do her panel presentation, she sees that Tom is on the same panel. She gives her portion of the talk, and it goes well. Malcolm and Anh are there to cheer her on.

Afterwards, the room empties out, and it’s just her and Tom. As they talk, she notices him moving closer until he tries to kiss her. When she pushes him away, he keeps trying. Finally, he says that she’s clearly someone who sleeps around to get ahead, and so they both know she’ll sleep with him, too, for the same reason. He also says that she only got on this panel because someone wanted to kiss-up to Adam Carlson.

He also says that Adam is the reason he accepted Olive into his lab. When Olive threatens to tell Adam about this, he says that Adam won’t believe her word against his. Olive also says she won’t go work in his lab, but Tom says she knows it’s the best option for her, and if she doesn’t then he’ll just replicate her research since he already knows all about it.

When Adam gets back to the hotel, Olive is crying. She tries to pretend nothing is wrong, but fails at it. Finally, she lies and tells him that she’s upset because she overheard someone saying that her research was “derivative” and that she was only chosen because of Adam.

Adam comforts her, and then he says he has an idea for where they should go instead.

Holding her hand, they walk past all the people at the department social and instead head out to dinner. Adam asks what she wants to eat, and Olive sees an all-you-can-eat sushi place and wants to go.

After dinner, as they head back, Olive’s heels are hurting her, so Adam gamely picks her up and brings her to their room. She then suggests that they watch a movie. Olive goes to grab a quick shower, and Adam offers her a t-shirt since she forgot to pack pajamas.

When Olive’s mind wanders back to being called mediocre (by Tom, though she doesn’t tell Adam that), Adam tells her about how his advisor had once told him he wouldn’t amount to anything because of a mistake he made. He says that he had started preparing applications for law school as a result, since the comment shook his confidence. However, Holden and Tom (who also trained under the same advisor) convinced him to stick with science.

Adam says that later he realized that his advisor was abusive and a bad mentor who created a toxic environment. Comparatively, Adam says that he is critical since he wants students to be better, but it isn’t about belittling them as people or cutting down their self-worth. Adam also says that no one ever reported his advisor’s behavior because he was short-listed for a Nobel Prize, and they didn’t think anyone would listen. Adam also mentions how Tom had helped mediate thing with him and his advisor, so he was grateful to Tom for that.

Adam then tells Olive that the abstracts submitted to SBD go through a blind review process, so they definitely didn’t choose her because of him.

Finally, Olive moves to kiss Adam, but before anything can happen, he stops her. He points out that she’s upset and staying in his room and that the situation feels coercive to him. When Olive says she’s fine, he points out that she said she was in love with someone else and that he doesn’t want to regret this later.

Olive convinces him that she’s fine with the situation, and soon things get intimate.

They have sex.

Afterwards, Olive asks Adam about a book he’s reading. He says it’s in Dutch and that he learned it as a kid. He also says that his parents were busy all the time and that he was mostly raised by au pairs. They then talk more about their childhoods.

As they chat, Adam finally tells Olive that he might be going to Harvard. The reason he’s leaving the conference early is to go interview with them. He thinks that working together with Tom in the same lab would make them much more productive. He also mentions that he could show her around Boston when she’s there.

Olive wakes up to a barrage of texts from Anh and Malcolm. When she finally talks to them, it turns out the Malcolm hooked up with Holden at the department social. Malcolm also says that Holden mentioned that Adam’s funds had been released (though Adam hadn’t mentioned it to Olive).

That night, Olive meets up with Adam. He wants to go out and have dinner, but Olive breaks things off with him, since she doesn’t know what to do about the Tom situation. She thinks that taking herself out of the equation is the best thing for him.

As she starts to leave, they end up kissing, but he pulls away, and she leaves.

Olive spends the next day crying. Then, determined not to send up at Harvard, Olive takes Adam’s advice to reach out to people through her advisor and asks Dr. Aslan to e-mail various people she’d met at the conference to see if they’d be interested in her research.

Dr. Aslan agrees, and also asks to see her speech. As Olive edits the video recording, Malcolm talks about how he went on a first date with Holden, but they ended up running into his entire family (since they are all science junkies who attend science conferences).

As she’s editing, Olive realizes she recorded her upsetting conversation with Tom. Malcolm and Anh hear her listening to it. Once they’ve listened to the whole thing, they insist that Olive needs to tell Adam about it. Finally, Malcolm fills Anh in on what was really going on with Olive and Adam. However, they both agree it’s clear that Olive has feelings for Adam and that Adam would want to know about this. Still, Olive knows how important the collaboration with Tom is to Adam, and she is reluctant to complicate things for him.

They decide to call Holden to ask for advice. Olive asks Holden what he thinks about Adam moving to Boston and working with Tom. Holden says that he doesn’t trust Tom. He says he thinks there was a weird dynamic where Tom was secretly sabotaging Adam during grad school and then defending him. He thinks that Tom likes Adam’s loyalty towards him and having influence over him. Holden also tells them that he thinks Tom and Adam’s collaboration benefits Tom more than Adam. Finally, Holden implies that he thinks the only reason Adam is considering leaving Stanford is because Olive is going to Harvard.

Olive tracks down Adam’s location at a dinner with some Harvard people, including Tom. When he sees her, he gets up and asks what’s wrong. Tom comes over to try to get Adam to sit back down, but Adam insists on talking to Olive. Finally, Olive starts playing the video. Adam grows furious as he realizes what happened. He tells Tom that he’s going to kill him and goes after him, but Olive tells Adam that he’s not worth it.

As the Harvard people demand an explanation, Adam ignores them and kisses Olive. He then tells Olive to send him the recording immediately and then goes to talk to the Harvard people.

A few days later, Olive is back home, and Adam is on his way back to San Francisco. Meanwhile, Olive has received responses from four cancer researchers who are all interested in her research.

When Adam gets back, Holden insists on a double date. Adam reluctantly agrees. When they all sit down, they address the fact that Malcolm still has misgivings about Adam because of Adam’s harsh criticism of his work. Adam tells Malcolm that it wasn’t personal.

As they joke around about pumpkin spiced flavored foods, Holden mentions how Adam has liked Olive for years. Olive corrects him, saying they’ve only been dating for a few weeks, but Holden says that they met three years ago and that he’s liked Olive ever since. Olive then realizes that Adam was definitely the The Guy (from three years ago) and that he did remember her.

After dinner, Olive and Adam head home. Adam tells Olive that Harvard is going to fire Tom and that there will be other disciplinary actions. Olive then tells Adam that she remembered him, too, from all those years ago. But she didn’t piece it together until later, and she admits that she didn’t say anything once she figured it out.

Finally, she tells him that she loves him (in broken Dutch).

Ten months later, it’s the 1-year anniversary of their first kiss. Olive and Adam go to the lab and recreate and their kiss at precisely the same time as last year.

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As a third-year Ph.D. candidate, Olive Smith doesn't believe in lasting romantic relationships--but her best friend does, and that's what got her into this situation. Convincing Anh that Olive is dating and well on her way to a happily ever after was always going to take more than hand-wavy Jedi mind tricks: Scientists require proof. So, like any self-respecting biologist, Olive panics and kisses the first man she sees.

That man is none other than Adam Carlsen, a young hotshot professor--and well-known ass. Which is why Olive is positively floored when Stanford's reigning lab tyrant agrees to keep her charade a secret and be her fake boyfriend. But when a big science conference goes haywire, putting Olive's career on the Bunsen burner, Adam surprises her again with his unyielding support and even more unyielding...six-pack abs.

Suddenly their little experiment feels dangerously close to combustion. And Olive discovers that the only thing more complicated than a hypothesis on love is putting her own heart under the microscope.

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For Chapter 16, I think it’s important to include the part where Olive comes out to Adam as demisexual. But other than that this is a great summary.

this book is so good i couldn’t put it down. the only i wish is it was both POVS i would of loved to see what adam was thinking during all of this or have his thoughts on when they met each other during the bathroom scene. and i would of loved to see him actually hurting tom for saying that stuff to olive.

'The Love Hypothesis' won Amazon's best romance book of 2021, has a near-perfect rating on Goodreads, and is all over TikTok. Here's why it's such a unique love story.

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• " The Love Hypothesis " grabbed the attention of romance readers everywhere in 2021.
• It was named Amazon's Best Romance Novel of 2021 and was nominated for a Goodreads Choice Award.
• This book checks off all my boxes for a great romance read and is definitely worth the hype.

This year, Amazon named " The Love Hypothesis " by Ali Hazelwood the best romance book of the year. Even though it was only recently published in September 2021, "The Love Hypothesis" has quickly become a fan-favorite, with 88% of Goodreads reviewers giving it four- or five-star-level praise .

It was also nominated for a Goodreads Choice Award and is hugely popular amongst Book of the Month members , with only 1% of readers giving it a "disliked" rating.

"The Love Hypothesis" is about Olive Smith, a third-year Ph.D. candidate studying pancreatic cancer at Stanford. In an attempt to convince one of her best friends that she's moved on from an old crush, she impulsively kisses Dr. Adam Carlsen, the department's notoriously brutal (but undeniably attractive) professor. After the kiss, Adam and Olive agree to fake a relationship so she can prove to her friend that she's happily dating and he can convince their department that he isn't planning to leave anytime soon.

I'm a little picky about my romance novels , so giving this read every bit of a five-star review didn't come lightly. My standards are high because the best romance novels have the potential to expose readers to authentic and imperfect relationships and offer new topics of discussion without making us feel like it's a story we've already read. 

With all the hype surrounding this new romance read, I couldn't resist picking it up.

Here's why "The Love Hypothesis" is one of my favorite recent romance books:

1. the story focuses a lot on olive and adam's lives outside their romance, making their love story more believable and interesting..

Romance novels tend to fall into a few popular tropes such as " enemies-to-lovers " or "forbidden love." "The Love Hypothesis" combines two of the most popular tropes right now, "Fake dating" and "grumpy/sunshine," really well — I loved the contrast between Adam's serious attitude to Olive's bright and sugary one. 

But despite following these tropes, the story feels fresh because it's also largely about Olive's work and its meaning to her. The only other romance book I've read featuring a STEM heroine is "The Kiss Quotient" , so I loved seeing that representation and learning about something new. 

The story honestly reflected the challenges Ph.D. candidates face in academia and that authenticity — deepened by the author's personal experiences — brought the characters, the settings, and the romance to life even more as Olive and Adam faced challenges with funding, time-consuming research, and questioning their sense of purpose.

2. The steamier scenes are also awkward and realistic, which made them even better.

In romance books, there are a few different levels of how graphic a steamy scene can get , from little-to-no detail to explicitly outlined movements. (I personally prefer mine to "fade to black.")

There was only one chapter with adult content, and it was definitely graphic. While I made a ton of ridiculous faces while reading and tried to skim past the parts that made me audibly gasp, I loved that it wasn't a movie-made, perfect sex scene with graceful movements and smooth dialogue. The scene was a little awkward, imperfect, and full of consent and conversation, making it refreshingly real.

3. The book deals with other topics besides the main love story, making it a much deeper read.

While it's wonderful to get swept up in the magic of a romantic storyline, having a secondary plot that addresses real issues is what makes a romance novel truly great . 

Mild spoilers and content warnings ahead: While "The Love Hypothesis" is a fun romantic read, it also addresses the pain of familial death, power differentials, intimacy challenges, and, most prevalently, workplace sexual harassment. 

Love is beautiful, fun, and amazing, but "The Love Hypothesis" takes the opportunity to also include conversations about serious issues. While these topics may be tough for some readers, I think these plot points, hard conversations, and complicated emotions take "The Love Hypothesis" to the next level and make it a five-star read. 

The bottom line

"The Love Hypothesis" has everything I personally look for in a romance novel: A unique storyline, authentic characters, and an important message. If you're looking for a perfectly balanced romance read, "The Love Hypothesis" is worth the hype and definitely one of the best romance books to come out in the past year.

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The Top 16 The Love Hypothesis Quotes by Ali HazelWood

“Academia takes a lot from you and gives back very little. It’s hard to stick around without a good reason to do so.”

-The Love Hypothesis, Ali Hazelwood

“You can fall in love: someone will catch you.”

“Because I’m starting to wonder if this is what being in love is. Being okay with ripping yourself to shreds, so the other person can stay whole.”

“I know it’s scary, being vulnerable, but you can allow yourself to care. You can want to be with people as more than just friends or casual acquaintances.”

“Love is a hypothesis, a gamble that two people take, hoping that the sum of their differences will be greater than the challenges they face.”

“Her heart may be broken, but her brain was doing just fine.”

“I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.”

“I’ve never been surer of anything. Except maybe cell theory.”

“Not having a life came in handy, sometimes.” 

“Only child of financially rich but emotionally poor parents. I could do whatever I wanted but had no one to do it with.”

“Or, you could stay mad, and we could go to your lab and throw test tubes full of toxic reagents at each other until the pain of third-degree burns overrides your shitty mood? Sounds like fun, no?”

“How are you?”

“Good. Fine. I mean I wish I were dead. But aside from that.”

“He’d been going on and on about this amazing girl for years.”

“I think that somewhere along the way I forgot that I was something. I forgot myself.”

“She loved him even more for it. For looking at her like she was the beginning and end of his every thought.”

“Neither are eyes.”

After reading, The Top 16 The Love Hypothesis Quotes, you can buy the book from here .

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The Love Hypothesis Kindle Edition

• Print length 383 pages
• Language English
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• Publisher Berkley
• Publication date September 14, 2021
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From the Publisher

Editorial reviews, excerpt. © reprinted by permission. all rights reserved..

Chapter One

Hypothesis: When given a choice between A (a slightly inconveniencing situation) and B (a colossal shitshow with devastating consequences), I will inevitably end up selecting B.

In Olive's defense, the man didn't seem to mind the kiss too much.

It did take him a moment to adjust-perfectly understandable, given the sudden circumstances. It was an awkward, uncomfortable, somewhat painful minute, in which Olive was simultaneously smashing her lips against his and pushing herself as high as her toes would extend to keep her mouth at the same level as his face. Did he have to be so tall? The kiss must have looked like some clumsy headbutt, and she grew anxious that she was not going to be able to pull the whole thing off. Her friend Anh, whom Olive had spotted coming her way a few seconds ago, was going to take one look at this and know at once that Olive and Kiss Dude couldn't possibly be two people in the middle of a date.

Then that agonizingly slow moment went by, and the kiss became . . . different. The man inhaled sharply and inclined his head a tiny bit, making Olive feel less like a squirrel monkey climbing a baobab tree, and his hands-which were large and pleasantly warm in the AC of the hallway-closed around her waist. They slid up a few inches, coming to wrap around Olive's rib cage and holding her to himself. Not too close, and not too far.

It was more of a prolonged peck than anything, but it was quite nice, and for the life span of a few seconds Olive forgot a large number of things, including the fact that she was pressed against a random, unknown dude. That she'd barely had the time to whisper "Can I please kiss you?" before locking lips with him. That what had originally driven her to put on this entire show was the hope of fooling Anh, her best friend in the whole world.

But a good kiss will do that: make a girl forget herself for a while. Olive found herself melting into a broad, solid chest that showed absolutely no give. Her hands traveled from a defined jaw into surprisingly thick and soft hair, and then-then she heard herself sigh, as if already out of breath, and that's when it hit her like a brick on the head, the realization that- No. No.

Nope, nope, no.

She should not be enjoying this. Random dude, and all that.

Olive gasped and pushed herself away from him, frantically looking for Anh. In the 11:00 p.m. bluish glow of the biology labs' hallway, her friend was nowhere to be seen. Weird. Olive was sure she had spotted her a few seconds earlier.

Kiss Dude, on the other hand, was standing right in front of her, lips parted, chest rising and a weird light flickering in his eyes, which was exactly when it dawned on her, the enormity of what she had just done. Of who she had just-

Fuck her life.

Fuck. Her. Life.

Because Dr. Adam Carlsen was a known ass.

This fact was not remarkable in and of itself, as in academia every position above the graduate student level (Olive's level, sadly) required some degree of assness in order to be held for any length of time, with tenured faculty at the very peak of the ass pyramid. Dr. Carlsen, though-he was exceptional. At least if the rumors were anything to go by.

He was the reason Olive's roommate, Malcolm, had to completely scrap two research projects and would likely end up graduating a year late; the one who had made Jeremy throw up from anxiety before his qualifying exams; the sole culprit for half the students in the department being forced to postpone their thesis defenses. Joe, who used to be in Olive's cohort and would take her to watch out-of-focus European movies with microscopic subtitles every Thursday night, had been a research assistant in Carlsen's lab, but he'd decided to drop out six months into it for "reasons." It was probably for the best, since most of Carlsen's remaining graduate assistants had perennially shaky hands and often looked like they hadn't slept in a year.

Dr. Carlsen might have been a young academic rock star and biology's wunderkind, but he was also mean and hypercritical, and it was obvious in the way he spoke, in the way he carried himself, that he thought himself the only person doing decent science within the Stanford biology department. Within the entire world, probably. He was a notoriously moody, obnoxious, terrifying dick.

And Olive had just kissed him.

She wasn't sure how long the silence lasted-only that he was the one to break it. He stood in front of Olive, ridiculously intimidating with dark eyes and even darker hair, staring down from who knows how many inches above six feet-he must have been over half a foot taller than she was. He scowled, an expression that she recognized from seeing him attend the departmental seminar, a look that usually preceded him raising his hand to point out some perceived fatal flaw in the speaker's work.

Adam Carlsen. Destroyer of research careers , Olive had once overheard her adviser say.

It's okay. It's fine. Totally fine. She was just going to pretend nothing had happened, nod at him politely, and tiptoe her way out of here. Yes, solid plan.

"Did you . . . Did you just kiss me?" He sounded puzzled, and maybe a little out of breath. His lips were full and plump and . . . God. Kissed. There was simply no way Olive could get away with denying what she had just done.

Still, it was worth a try.

Surprisingly, it seemed to work.

"Ah. Okay, then." Carlsen nodded and turned around, looking vaguely disoriented. He took a couple of steps down the hallway, reached the water fountain-maybe where he'd been headed in the first place.

Olive was starting to believe that she might actually be off the hook when he halted and turned back with a skeptical expression.

"Are you sure?"

"I-" She buried her face in her hands. "It's not the way it looks."

"Okay. I . . . Okay," he repeated slowly. His voice was deep and low and sounded a lot like he was on his way to get ting mad. Like maybe he was already mad. "What's going on here?"

There was simply no way to explain this. Any normal person would have found Olive's situation odd, but Adam Carlsen, who obviously considered empathy a bug and not a feature of humanity, could never understand. She let her hands fall to her sides and took a deep breath.

"I . . . listen, I don't mean to be rude, but this is really none of your business."

He stared at her for a moment, and then he nodded. "Yes. Of course." He must be getting back into his usual groove, because his tone had lost some of its surprise and was back to normal-dry. Laconic. "I'll just go back to my office and begin to work on my Title IX complaint."

Olive exhaled in relief. "Yeah. That would be great, since- Wait. Your what?"

He cocked his head. "Title IX is a federal law that protects against sexual misconduct within academic settings-"

"I know what Title IX is."

"I see. So you willfully chose to disregard it."

"I- What? No. No, I didn't!"

He shrugged. "I must be mistaken, then. Someone else must have assaulted me."

"Assault-I didn't 'assault' you."

"You did kiss me."

"But not really ."

"Without first securing my consent."

"I asked if I could kiss you!"

"And then did so without waiting for my response."

"What? You said yes."

"Excuse me?"

She frowned. "I asked if I could kiss you, and you said yes."

"Incorrect. You asked if you could kiss me and I snorted."

"I'm pretty sure I heard you said yes."

He lifted one eyebrow, and for a minute Olive let herself daydream of drowning someone. Dr. Carlsen. Herself. Both sounded like great options.

"Listen, I'm really sorry. It was a weird situation. Can we just forget that this happened?"

He studied her for a long moment, his angular face serious and something else, something that she couldn't quite decipher because she was too busy noticing all over again how damn towering and broad he was. Just massive. Olive had always been slight, just this side of too slender, but girls who are five eight rarely felt diminutive. At least until they found themselves standing next to Adam Carlsen. She'd known that he was tall, of course, from seeing him around the department or walking across campus, from sharing the elevator with him, but they'd never interacted. Never been this close.

Except for a second ago, Olive. When you almost put your tongue in his-

"Is something wrong?" He sounded almost concerned.

"What? No. No, there isn't."

"Because," he continued calmly, "kissing a stranger at midnight in a science lab might be a sign that there is."

"There isn't."

Carlsen nodded, thoughtful. "Very well. Expect mail in the next few days, then." He began to walk past her, and she turned to yell after him.

"You didn't even ask my name!"

"I'm sure anyone could figure it out, since you must have swiped your badge to get in the labs area after hours. Have a good night."

"Wait!" She leaned forward and stopped him with a hand on his wrist. He paused immediately, even though it was obvious that it would take him no effort to free himself, and stared pointedly at the spot where her fingers had wrapped around his skin-right below a wristwatch that probably cost half her yearly graduate salary. Or all of it.

She let go of him at once and took one step back. "Sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"The kiss. Explain."

Olive bit into her lower lip. She had truly screwed herself over. She had to tell him, now. "Anh Pham." She looked around to make sure Anh was really gone. "The girl who was passing by. She's a graduate student in the biology department."

Carlsen gave no indication of knowing who Anh was.

"Anh has . . ." Olive pushed a strand of brown hair behind her ear. This was where the story became embarrassing. Complicated, and a little juvenile sounding. "I was seeing this guy in the department. Jeremy Langley, he has red hair and works with Dr. . . . Anyway, we went out just a couple of times, and then I brought him to Anh's birthday party, and they just sort of hit it off and-"

Olive shut her eyes. Which was probably a bad idea, because now she could see it painted on her lids, how her best friend and her date had bantered in that bowling alley, as if they'd known each other their whole lives; the never-exhausted topics of conversation, the laughter, and then, at the end of the night, Jeremy following Anh's every move with his gaze. It had been painfully clear who he was interested in. Olive waved a hand and tried for a smile.

"Long story short, after Jeremy and I ended things he asked Anh out. She said no because of . . . girl code and all that, but I can tell that she really likes him. She's afraid to hurt my feelings, and no matter how many times I told her it was fine she wouldn't believe me."

Not to mention that the other day I overheard her confess to our friend Malcolm that she thought Jeremy was awesome, but she could never betray me by going out with him, and she sounded so dejected. Disappointed and insecure, not at all like the spunky, larger-than-life Anh I am used to.

"So I just lied and told her that I was already dating someone else. Because she's one of my closest friends and I'd never seen her like a guy this much and I want her to have the good things she deserves and I'm positive that she would do the same for me and-" Olive realized that she was rambling and that Carlsen couldn't have cared less. She stopped and swallowed, even though her mouth felt dry. "Tonight. I told her I'd be on a date tonight ."

"Ah." His expression was unreadable.

"But I'm not. So I decided to come in to work on an experiment, but Anh showed up, too. She wasn't supposed to be here. But she was. Coming this way. And I panicked-well." Olive wiped a hand down her face. "I didn't really think."

Carlsen didn't say anything, but it was there in his eyes that he was thinking. Obviously.

"I just needed her to believe that I was on a date."

He nodded. "So you kissed the first person you saw in the hallway. Perfectly logical."

Olive winced. "When you put it like that, perhaps it wasn't my best moment."

"But it wasn't my worst, either! I'm pretty sure Anh saw us. Now she'll think that I was on a date with you and she'll hopefully feel free to go out with Jeremy and-" She shook her head. "Listen. I'm so, so sorry about the kiss."

"Please, don't report me. I really thought I heard you say yes. I promise I didn't mean to . . ."

Suddenly, the enormity of what she had just done fully dawned on her. She had just kissed a random guy, a guy who happened to be the most notoriously unpleasant faculty member in the biology department. She'd misunderstood a snort for consent, she'd basically attacked him in the hallway, and now he was staring at her in that odd, pensive way, so large and focused and close to her, and . . .

Maybe it was the late night. Maybe it was that her last coffee had been sixteen hours ago. Maybe it was Adam Carlsen looking down at her, like that. All of a sudden, this entire situation was just too much.

"Actually, you're absolutely right. And I am so sorry. If you felt in any way harassed by me, you really should report me, because it's only fair. It was a horrible thing to do, though I really didn't want to . . . Not that my intentions matter; it's more like your perception of . . ."

Crap, crap, crap.

"I'm going to leave now, okay? Thank you, and . . . I am so, so, so sorry." Olive spun around on her heels and ran away down the hallway.

"Olive," she heard him call after her. "Olive, wait-"

She didn't stop. She sprinted down the stairs to the first floor and then out the building and across the pathways of the sparsely lit Stanford campus, running past a girl walking her dog and a group of students laughing in front of the library. She continued until she was standing in front of her apartment's door, stopping only to unlock it, making a beeline for her room in the hope of avoiding her roommate and whoever he might have brought home tonight. It wasn’t until she slumped on her bed, staring at the glow‑in‑the- dark stars glued to her ceiling, that she realized that she had neglected to check on her lab mice. She had also left her laptop on her bench and her sweatshirt somewhere in the lab, and she had completely forgotten to stop at the store and buy the coffee she’d promised Malcolm she’d get for tomorrow morning. Shit. What a disaster of a day. It never occurred to Olive that Dr. Adam Carlsen— known ass— had called her by her name.

About the Author

Product details.

• ASIN ‏ : ‎ B08T6XN4FP
• Publisher ‏ : ‎ Berkley (September 14, 2021)
• Publication date ‏ : ‎ September 14, 2021
• Language ‏ : ‎ English
• File size ‏ : ‎ 3306 KB
• Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
• Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
• Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
• X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
• Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
• Sticky notes ‏ : ‎ On Kindle Scribe
• Print length ‏ : ‎ 383 pages
• Page numbers source ISBN ‏ : ‎ 1408725762
• #43 in Workplace Romance eBooks
• #62 in Workplace Romance
• #406 in Romantic Comedy (Kindle Store)

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About the author

Ali hazelwood.

Ali Hazelwood is a multi-published author—alas, of peer-reviewed articles about brain science, in which no one makes out and the ever after is not always happy. Originally from Italy, she lived in Germany and Japan before moving to the U.S. to pursue a Ph.D. in neuroscience. She recently became a professor, which absolutely terrifies her. When Ali is not at work, she can be found running, crocheting, eating cake pops, or watching sci-fi movies with her two feline overlords (and her slightly-less-feline husband).

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The Love Hypothesis

When a fake relationship between scientists meets the irresistible force of attraction, it throws one woman’s carefully calculated theories on love into chaos.

As a third-year Ph.D. candidate, Olive Smith doesn’t believe in lasting romantic relationships–but her best friend does, and that’s what got her into this situation. Convincing Anh that Olive is dating and well on her way to a happily ever after was always going to take more than hand-wavy Jedi mind tricks: Scientists require proof. So, like any self-respecting biologist, Olive panics and kisses the first man she sees.

That man is none other than Adam Carlsen, a young hotshot professor–and well-known ass. Which is why Olive is positively floored when Stanford’s reigning lab tyrant agrees to keep her charade a secret and be her fake boyfriend. But when a big science conference goes haywire, putting Olive’s career on the Bunsen burner, Adam surprises her again with his unyielding support and even more unyielding…six-pack abs.

Suddenly their little experiment feels dangerously close to combustion. And Olive discovers that the only thing more complicated than a hypothesis on love is putting her own heart under the microscope.

If you would like to read a list of content warnings for The Love Hypothesis (warning for mild spoilers), please click here . 

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The Love Hypothesis

48 pages • 1 hour read

A modern alternative to SparkNotes and CliffsNotes, SuperSummary offers high-quality Study Guides with detailed chapter summaries and analysis of major themes, characters, and more.

Chapter Summaries & Analyses

Prologue-Chapter 3

Chapters 4-6

Chapters 7-8

Chapters 9-11

Chapters 12-13

Chapters 14-15

Chapters 16-19

Chapter 20-Epilogue

Character Analysis

Symbols & Motifs

Important Quotes

Essay Topics

Different Types of Intelligence

Through the representation of academia , Olive’s difficulty to parse her emotions, and the differences between Olive and Malcolm , The Love Hypothesis shows how there are different types of intelligence. Olive, Adam, and others within the Stanford community possess intelligence, as evidenced by the fact they work in academia. Many of Olive’s thoughts about her experiment show how she understands the material and is always seeking new information with which to supplement what she already believes. Tom’s insults in later chapters reveal just how intelligent Olive is. While Tom also possesses a level of intelligence to remain in the field, even if that intelligence is only enough for him to copy and add to the work of others, his jealousy and view of Olive as a threat shows just how intelligent her thought processes are.

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• Feb 26, 2022
• 15 min read

The Love Hypothesis by Ali Hazelwood

The Love Hypothesis

by Ali Hazelwood

Published by Berkley Books

Book 1 in the Love Hypothesis series

As a third-year Ph.D. candidate, Olive Smith doesn't believe in lasting romantic relationships--but her best friend does, and that's what got her into this situation.

Convincing Anh that Olive is dating and well on her way to a happily ever after was always going to take more than hand-wavy Jedi mind tricks: Scientists require proof. So, like any self-respecting biologist, Olive panics and kisses the first man she sees.

That man is none other than Adam Carlsen, a young hotshot professor--and well-known ass. Which is why Olive is positively floored when Stanford's reigning lab tyrant agrees to keep her charade a secret and be her fake boyfriend. But when a big science conference goes haywire, putting Olive's career on the Bunsen burner, Adam surprises her again with his unyielding support and even more unyielding... six-pack abs.

Suddenly their little experiment feels dangerously close to combustion. And Olive discovers that the only thing more complicated than a hypothesis on love is putting her own heart under the microscope.

This gif made me laugh.

Age Recommendation:

Contemporary Romance

The Love Hypothesis by Ali Hazelwood is the first book in her Love Hypothesis series . It centers around Olive, a third year Ph. D. candidate, who finds herself forced to prove to her best friend that she is happily dating - by panicking and kissing the first man she sees. That man being the incredibly successful, and brutal young professor - Adam. Adam is a known ass, so Olive is surprised when he agrees to pretend they are in a relationship. Everything is going well - except for those pesky feelings Olive is developing for the man. When events at a science conference go down, putting Olive's professional dreams in danger, she is unsure how to move forward. But when the truth comes out, she is surprised by the support Adam shows her, and that maybe she isn't the only one who fell in love.

The Love Hypothesis easily made it on to my TBR with the sheer amount of recommendations and praise it gets on #booktok . And since I'm currently trying to get through Go Tell The Bees That I'm Gone , and I tried rereading a book I once loved, only to discover some MAJOR problems this time around, which ruins it for me, I needed something to perk me up a little. So I bought The Love Hypothesis - and it worked. It totally invigorated me, and I ended up putting Outlander down for a day, because I couldn't stop reading. Listen - I love a grump/sunshine trope, and while The Love Hypothesis is a known fake relationship trope (and even pokes fun at itself for it), the grumpy Adam had me at the get-go. And I liked Olive too. The chemistry between these two characters was great, they conversations were lovely, and the side characters added a nice balance to the story. The plot didn't feel cheesy, and was truly entertaining.

One thing that I couldn't help but notice - and this is more with the #booktok community, and not the book itself - is the steaminess of this book. More often then not, The Love Hypothesis is listed as super steamy. And I won't lie, there is one part in the book that IS steamy and intense. Adam's enthusiasm was absolutely delicious . But I argue that The Love Hypothesis isn't as steamy as it is reviewed to be. There is exactly one sex scene in this book. I mean, it's a night, and its multiple times - but it's actually a rather small part of the book. And while it was steamy, I don't think it sets itself apart from other contemporary romances when it comes to the sex. The romance in this book is where its at. But yes ... that sex scene is hot .

I wouldn't go into The Love Hypothesis thinking you are about to read some hot smut. I did, because of all those reviews from #booktok , but luckily, I do LOVE romance, so I wasn't disappointed. I wasn't disappointed at all. Ali Hazelwood wrote a wonderful story, with both plot and characters being huge winners for me. The romance and sex was top notch. And honestly, this book saved me from entering that dreaded book slump us readers hate.

The first time they meet

Olive proposing they fake date - and Adam's joke about having a wife and kids

Olive sitting on Adam's lap

The kiss after Adam helped pushed a truck off the road

The sunscreen

Adam and Olive's talk in the break room

The flu shot

Holden telling Olive about the prom

Adam offering to help Olive with her talk

Their dinner at the all you can eat sushi place

OH MY GOD THEM HOOKING UP AND THE ENTHUSIAM *cue drooling*

Holden and Malcolm <3

The Uber driver

How the truth comes out

Olive telling Adam she loves him in dutch

Adam : "Academia’s a lot of bucks for very little bang. What matters is whether your reason to be in academia is good enough. So, why the Ph.D., Olive?”

Olive : “I have a question. A specific research question. Something that I want to find out. Something I’m afraid no one else will discover if I don’t.”

Adam : “A question?”

Olive : “Yes. Something that’s important to me. And—I don’t trust anyone else to do it. Because they haven’t so far. Because . . .”

Because something bad happened. Because I want to do my part so that it won’t happen again. Heavy thoughts to have in the presence of a stranger, in the darkness of her closed eyelids. So she cracked them open; her vision was still blurry, but the burning was mostly gone. The Guy was looking at her. Fuzzy around the edges, perhaps, but so very there, waiting patiently for her to continue.

Olive: “It’s important to me. The research that I want to do.”

He nodded but said nothing as he straightened and took a few steps toward the door. Clearly leaving.

Olive: “Is mine a good enough reason to go to grad school?”

Adam : “It’s the best one.” Anh : “Listen, do you remember last spring, when I held your hair back while you projectile vomited the five pounds of spoiled shrimp cocktail you ate at Dr. Park’s retirement party?”

Olive : “Oh, yes. I do.”

Olive cocked her head, pensive.

Olive: “You ate more than me and never got sick.”

Anh : “Because I’m made of sterner stuff, but never mind that. The point is: I am here for you, and always will be, no matter what. No matter how many pounds of spoiled shrimp cocktail you projectile vomit, you can trust me. We’re a team, you and I." Anh : “Is he blackmailing you?”

Olive : “Huh?”

Anh : “Carlsen. Is he blackmailing you? Did he find out that you’re an aberration and pee in the shower?”

Olive : “First of all, it’s time efficient.”

Olive glared.

Olive: “Second, I find it oddly flattering that you’d think Carlsen would go to these ridiculous lengths to get me to date him.”

Anh : “Anyone would, Ol. Because you’re awesome. Except when you’re peeing in the shower.” Adam : “Ground rules?”

Olive : “Yes. You know. What we are allowed and not allowed to do. What we can expect from this arrangement. I think that’s pretty standard protocol, before embarking on a fake-dating relationship.”

He tilted his head.

Adam : “Standard protocol?”

Olive : “Yup.”

Adam : “How many times have you done this?”

Olive : “Zero. But I am familiar with the trope.”

Adam : “The . . . what?”

He blinked at her, confused. Olive: “For this to work we should probably . . . do things together. Every once in a while.”

Adam : “Things?”

Olive : “Things. Stuff.”

Adam : “Stuff,”

Olive : “Yep. Stuff. What do you do for fun?”

He was probably into something atrocious, like cow-tipping excursions or Japanese beetle fighting. Maybe he collected porcelain dolls. Maybe he was an avid geocacher. Maybe he frequented vaping conventions. Oh God. Olive: “I would never fake-date a dude who thinks that he has to pay for my coffee just because he’s a dude.”

He lifted an eyebrow.

Adam: “I doubt a language exists in which the thing you just ordered could be referred to as ‘coffee.’ ” Olive : “Yes, I’m Olive Smith, the—”

Tom : “Girlfriend I’ve heard so much about?”

Shit. Shit, shit, shit. She swallowed.

Olive: “Um, actually I—”

Adam : “Heard from whom?”

Dr. Benton shrugged.

Tom: “Everyone.”

Adam : “Everyone,”

Adam repeated. He was scowling now.

Adam: “In Boston?”

Tom : “Yeah.”

Adam : “Why are people at Harvard talking about my girlfriend?”

Tom : “Because you’re you.”

Adam : “Because I’m me?”

Adam looked perplexed.

Tom: “There have been tears. Some hair-pulling. A few broken hearts. Don’t worry, they’ll get over it.” Anh : "You’re taking up space we don’t have, and it’s only logical that you use Carlsen as a chair. I would, but he’s your boyfriend, not mine.”

For a moment, Olive tried to imagine what Adam would do if Anh decided to sit on his lap, and figured that it would probably end up involving someone being murdered and someone doing the murdering—she wasn’t sure who’d be doing what. The mental image was so ridiculous that she almost giggled out loud. Then she noticed the way Anh was looking at her expectantly.

Olive: “Anh, I can’t.”

Anh : “Why?”

Olive : “Because. This is a scientific talk.”

Anh : “Psh. Remember last year, when Jess and Alex made out for half of that CRISPR lecture?”

Olive : “I do—and it was weird .” Olive was here. Sitting. On. Adam. This.

Yep, this. This was her life now. Adam: “This is dull.”

Olive : “Maybe you should ask a question. To liven this up.”

Adam turned slightly to her.

Adam: “Me?”

She angled her head to speak in his ear.

Olive: “I’m sure you can come up with something. Just raise your hand and make a mean observation with that tone of yours. Glare at him. It might devolve into an entertaining outbreak of fisticuffs.”

His cheek curved.

Adam: “You are such a smart-ass.” Olive : "See you Wed— Hey, what about the picnic?”

Adam : “The— Oh.”

Adam rolled his eyes, looking a little more like himself.

Adam: “Right. That fu— That picnic.”

She grinned.

Olive: “It’s on Monday.”

Adam: “I know.”

Olive : “You’re still going?”

He gave her a look that clearly stated: It’s not like I have a choice, even though I’d rather have my nails extracted one by one. With pliers. Olive laughed.

Olive: “Well. I’m going, too.”

Adam : “At least there’s that.”

Olive : “Are you bringing Tom?”

Adam : “Probably. He actually likes people.”

Olive : “Okay. I can network with him a bit, and you and I can show off how steady and committed we are to the department chair. You’ll look like a wingless bird. No flight risk whatsoever.”

Adam : “Perfect. I’ll bring a counterfeit marriage license to casually drop at his feet.” Olive : “What are they even playing?”

Anh : “Ultimate Frisbee, I think? I don’t know. Did you put on sunblock? You’re wearing a tank top and shorts, so you really should.”

Olive : “You Americans and your fake sports.”

Anh : “I’m pretty sure there are Canadian tournaments of Ultimate Frisbee, too. You know what’s not fake?”

Olive : “What?”

Anh : “Melanoma. Put on some sunscreen.” Anh : “Olive has way too much and was wondering what to do with it. She’ll put some on you!”

No. No, no, no.

Olive: “I can’t. It would be highly inappropriate.”

Anh : “Why? I put sunscreen on Jeremy all the time. Look”

—she squirted lotion on her hand and haphazardly slapped it across Jeremy’s face—

Anh: “I am putting sunscreen on my boyfriend. Because I don’t want him to get melanoma. Am I ‘inappropriate’?”

Olive was going to murder her. Olive was going to make her lick every drop of this stupid sunscreen and watch her writhe in pain as she slowly died of oxybenzone poisoning. Olive: “Hey, you want half of this? Since I fully plan to eat what’s left of your chips.”

Adam : “Nah.”

Olive : “You sure?”

Adam : “Can’t stand chocolate.”

Olive stared at him, shaking her head in disbelief.

Olive: “You would, wouldn’t you? Hate everything that is delicious and lovely and comforting.”

Adam : “Chocolate’s disgusting.”

Olive : “You just want to live in your dark, bitter world made of black coffee and plain bagels with plain cream cheese. And occasionally salt-and-vinegar chips.

Adam : "They are clearly your favorite chips—”

Olive : “Not the point.”

Adam : “—and I am flattered that you’ve memorized my orders.”

Olive : “It does help that they’re always the same.”

Adam : “At least I’ve never ordered something called a unicorn Frappuccino.”

Olive : “That was so good. It tasted like the rainbow.”

Adam : “Like sugar and food coloring?”

Olive : “My two favorite things in the universe." Olive : “I do get what you’re saying. About not wanting to form a new generation of crappy millennial scientists.”

Adam : “I don’t believe I’ve ever used the expression ‘crappy millennial scientists.’ ”

Olive : “But FYI, I still think that you don’t need to be that harsh when you give feedback. We get the gist of what you’re saying, even if you give criticism more nicely.”

He looked at her for a long time. Then he nodded, once.

Adam: “Noted.”

Olive : “Are you going to be less harsh, then?”

Adam : “Unlikely.”

She sighed.

Olive: “You know, when I have no more friends and everyone hates me because of this fake-dating thing, I’ll be super lonely and you are going to have to hang out with me every day. I’ll annoy you all the time. Is it really worth being mean to every grad in the program?”

Adam : “Absolutely.” Olive : “Aww.”

He pinned her with a withering look.

Adam: “Don’t aww me.” Adam : “Please.”

He looked pained.

Adam: “Don’t make me.”

He was so adorable.

Olive: “It’s for your own good. And for the good of the elderly people who might come in any proximity to you. Even more elderly than you, that is.”

He sighed, defeated.

Adam: “Olive.”

Olive : “Come on. Maybe we’re lucky and the chair will spot us. And I’ll buy you an ice cream sandwich afterward.”

Adam : “Will I be paying for this ice cream sandwich?”

He sounded resigned now.

Olive: “Likely. Actually, scratch that, you probably don’t like ice cream anyway, because you don’t enjoy anything that’s good in life.”

She kept on walking, pensively chewing on her lower lip.

Olive: “Maybe the cafeteria has some raw broccoli?”

Adam : “I don’t deserve this verbal abuse on top of the flu shot.” Olive glanced at her gloved hands, and then back at her mouse, who was still holding on to the wire.

Olive: “Dude, stop trying so hard.”

She kneeled until she was at eye level with the cage. The mouse kicked around with its little legs, its tail flopping back and forth.

Olive: “You’re supposed to be bad at this. And I’m supposed to write a dissertation about how bad you are. And then you get a chunk of cheese, and I get a real job that pays real money and the joy of saying ‘I’m not that kind of doctor’ when someone is having a stroke on my airplane.”

The mouse squeaked and let go of the wire, flopping on the floor of the testing cage with a thud.

Olive: “That’ll do it.”

Text: Adam: My arm hurts.

Olive : From the flu shot?

Adam : It’s really painful.

She giggled. She truly had not thought she was the type to, but here she was, covering her mouth with her hand and . . . yes, giggling like a fool in the middle of the lab. Her mouse was staring up at her, its tiny red eyes a mix of judgment and surprise. Olive hastily turned away and looked back at her phone.

Olive: Oh, Adam. I’m so sorry.

Olive : Should I come over and kiss it better?

Adam : You never said it would hurt so bad.

Olive : As someone once told me, it’s not my job to work on your emotion regulation skills.

Adam’s answer was one single emoji (a yellow hand with a raised middle finger), Olive: “How could this happen? I am not like this. This is not me. How could I—and Adam Carlsen, of everyone. Who is into Adam Carlsen?”

Malcolm snorted.

Malcolm: “Everyone, Ol. He’s a tall, broody, sullen hunk with a genius IQ. Everyone likes tall, broody, sullen hunks with genius IQs.”

Olive : “I don’t!”

Malcolm : “Clearly you do.”

She squeezed her eyes shut and whimpered.

Olive: “He’s really not that sullen.”

Malcolm : “Oh, he is. Just, you don’t notice, because you’re halfway gone for him.”

Olive : “I am not—”

She smacked her forehead. Repeatedly.

Olive: “Shit.” Holden : “You’re leaving for Boston tonight, right?”

Adam : “Yeah. Can you still give Tom and me a ride to the airport?”

Holden : “Depends.”

Adam : “On what?”

Holden : “Is Tom going to be gagged and tied up in the trunk?”

Adam sighed.

Adam: “Holden.”

Holden : “I’ll allow him in the back seat, but if he doesn’t keep his mouth shut, I’ll ditch him on the highway.”

Adam : “Fine. I’ll let him know.” Holden : “Picture this, Olive. Early two thousands. Preppy, ridiculously expensive all-male DC school. Two gay students in grade twelve. Well, two of us that were out, anyway. Richie Muller and I date for the entirety of senior year—and then he dumps me three days before prom for some guy he’d been having a thing with for months.”

Adam : “He was a prick,”

Holden : “I have three choices. Not go to the dance and mope at home. Go alone and mope at school. Or, have my best friend—who was planning on staying home and moping over gamma-aminobutyric acids—come as my date. Guess which?”

Olive gasped.

Olive: “How did you convince him?”

Holden : “That’s the thing, I didn’t. When I told him about what Richie did, he offered!”

Adam : “Don’t get used to it,”

Holden : “Can you believe it, Olive?”

That Adam would pretend to be in a relationship with someone to get them out of a miserable situation?

Olive: “Nope.”

Holden : “We held hands. We slow-danced. We made Richie spit out his punch and regret every single one of his wretched choices. Then we went home and played even more Final Fantasy. It was the shit.” Olive : “Adam. There will be only one bed.”

He frowned.

Adam: “No, as I said it’s a double—”

Olive : “It’s not. It won’t be. There will be only one bed, for sure.”

He gave her a puzzled look.

Adam: “I got the booking confirmation the other day. I can forward it to you if you want; it says that—”

Olive : “It doesn’t matter what it says. It’s always one bed.” Olive : “How likely is it that your feedback will cause me to cry under the shower?”

Adam : “That depends on the quality of your slides.”

She smiled.

Olive: “Don’t feel like you have to hold back.”

Adam : “Believe me, I don’t.” Adam : “Should I buy you that disgusting”

—Adam gestured toward the register—

Adam: “pumpkin sludge now?”

Olive: “Oh, yes. I mean, if you want to.”

Adam : “I’d rather buy you anything else.”

Olive : “Too bad.” Adam : "How are you?”

Olive : “Good. Fine. I mean, I wish I were dead. But aside from that.”

He laughed silently and moved closer.

Adam: “You’ll be okay.”

She had thought sweaters were a good look for him, but only because she’d never seen him wear a blazer. He had a secret weapon all along, she thought, trying not to stare too hard. And now he’s unleashing it. Damn him.

Olive: “Agreed. After I die.” You just had to go and make me fall for you, she thought, blinking against his skin. You absolute ass. Olive: “Awesome. We could chat about how nice this place is—”

Adam : “It’s appalling.”

Olive : “—or the taste of the sushi—”

Adam : “Foot.”

Olive : “—or the best movie in the Fast and Furious franchise—”

Adam : “ Fast Five . Though I have a feeling you’re going to say—”

Olive : “ Tokyo Drift .”

Adam : “Right.” Adam : “You are not mediocre, Olive. You were not invited to speak because people think that you are my girlfriend—there is no such thing, since SBD’s abstracts go through a blind review process. I would know, because I’ve been roped into reviewing them in the past. And the work you presented is important, rigorous, and brilliant.”

He took a deep breath. His shoulders rose and fell in time with the thudding of her heart.

Adam: “I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.” Olive : “You’re so big.”

He groaned into her neck. His entire body was vibrating with tension.

Adam: “You can take it.” The truth, Adam, is that your friend, your collaborator, a person you clearly love and are close to, is horrid and despicable. He told me things that might be truths, or maybe lies—I don’t know. I’m not sure. I’m not sure of anything anymore, and I would love to ask you, so badly. But I’m terrified that he might be right, and that you won’t believe me. And I’m even more terrified that you will believe me, and that what I tell you will force you to give up something that is very important to you: your friendship and your work with him. I’m terrified of everything, as you can see. So, instead of telling you that truth, I will tell you another truth. A truth that, I think, will be best for you. A truth that will take me out of the equation, but will make its result better. Because I’m starting to wonder if this is what being in love is. Being okay with ripping yourself to shreds, so the other person can stay whole . Anh: “I don’t hate you.”

Olive : “You . . . don’t?”

Anh : “Of course not.”

Anh was indignant.

Anh: “I low-key hate myself for forcing you to do all that stuff. Well, maybe not ‘hate,’ but I’d write myself a strongly worded email. And I’m incredibly flattered that you’d do something like that for me. I mean, it was misguided, and ridiculous, and needlessly convoluted, and you’re a living, breathing, rom-com trope machine, and . . . God, Ol, you’re such an idiot. But a very lovable idiot, and my idiot.” Adam : “I’m going to kill you. If you say another word about the woman I love, if you look at her, if you even think about her—I’m going to fucking kill you.” Adam : “I am going to take care of this. And then I’ll come find you, and I’ll take care of you.” Adam : “I’m not having dinner out,”

Holden frowned.

Holden: “Why?”

Adam : “I have better things to do.”

Holden : “Like what? Olive’s coming, too.”

Adam : “Leave Olive alone. She’s tired, and we’re busy.”

Holden : “I have access to your Google Calendar, asshole. You’re not busy. If you don’t want to hang out with me, you can just be honest.”

Adam : “I don’t want to hang out with you.”

Holden : “You little shit. After the week we just had. And on my birthday.”

Adam recoiled slightly.

Adam: “What? It’s not your birthday.”

Holden : “Yes, it is.”

Adam : “Your birthday is April tenth.”

Holden : “Is it, though?”

Adam closed his eyes, scratching his forehead.

Adam: “Holden, we’ve talked daily for the past twenty-five years, and I have been to at least five Power Rangers–themed birthday parties of yours. The last one was when you turned seventeen.”

Malcolm attempted to cover his laugh with a cough.

Adam: “I know when your birthday is.” Olive : “ Ik hou van jou, Adam.” Olive : “May I kiss you, Dr. Carlsen?”

#fakerelationship #workplace #loveatfirstsight #agegap #grump

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The Love Hypothesis

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