How Self-Awareness Makes You a Better Counselor

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As a counselor, you are trained to observe your client’s behavior. It is equally important for the counselor to look within.

One of the most effective tools you will use, as a counselor, is your self-awareness. Self-awareness is having an objective knowledge about your strengths and areas in need of growth, within your personality.

In a therapeutic session, this perspective allows the counselor to question his or her own thoughts, feelings, and biases. Without this process, counselors may react to their own and their client’s subconscious programming.

Increasing your self-awareness, helps you become a more effective counselor in how you relate to your clients. This skill can advance your professional and personal development.

What is Countertransference?

It is important to address any kind of unconscious or conscious transference in the therapeutic relationship. This helps maintain appropriate therapeutic limits and allows you to offer empathic care to the client.

It is normal, as a counselor, to have positive or negative feelings towards your client. Countertransference often begins as unresolved issues related to the counselor’s family or cultural upbringing. When counselors become aware of these internal reactions and gain understanding from them, they become more successful counselors. Without proper understanding, countertransference can interfere with the therapy process.

Listed is the ethical code from the American Psychological Association (2017) regarding competence, personal problems, and conflicts.

APA 2.06 Personal Problems and Conflicts

“Psychologists refrain from initiating an activity when they know or should know that there is a substantial likelihood that their personal problems will prevent them from performing their work-related activities in a competent manner. When psychologists become aware of personal problems that may interfere with their performing work-related duties adequately, they take appropriate measures, such as obtaining professional consultation or assistance and determining whether they should limit, suspend or terminate their work-related duties. (See also Standard 10.10, Terminating Therapy.)”

How to Recognize and Avoid Biases

When counselors are engaged and working to increase awareness of their own thoughts, feelings, and biases, this will benefit the therapeutic relationship and avoid harm to the client. Knowing your personality and biases, allows you to manage your internal reaction and stay present with the client.

This is stated in The American Counseling Association Code of Ethics (2014) A.4. Avoiding Harm and Imposing Values:

A.4.a. Avoiding Harm and Imposing Values

“Counselors act to avoid harming their clients, trainees, and research participants and to minimize or to remedy unavoidable or unanticipated harm.”

A.4.b. Personal Values

“Counselors are aware of—and avoid imposing—their own values, attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors. Counselors respect the diversity of clients, trainees, and research participants and seek training in areas in which they are at risk of imposing their values onto clients, especially when the counselor’s values are inconsistent with the client’s goals or are discriminatory in nature.”

When diagnosing mental disorders, the American Counseling Association’s Ethical Codes (2014) E.5.c. Historical and Social Prejudices in the Diagnosis of Pathology states,

“Counselors recognize historical and social prejudices in the misdiagnosis and pathologizing of certain individuals and groups and strive to become aware of and address such biases in themselves or others.”

Having and Maintaining Competency

A part of competency is having the awareness of your skillset and admitting that you may not be qualified to work with certain client issues or populations. This does not make you less of a counselor. It is impossible for counselors to know about all topics in psychology.

Some of your clients may benefit from having other supportive services in addition to the therapy you offer. When you refer a client for additional services, obtain a release of information between yourself and the other provider to effectively coordinate care. If you determine you do not have the appropriate training or experience to work with a certain client issue, your client would need to be transferred to another therapist.

Various ethical codes from the American Counseling Association (2014) outline professional competence and also highlight the importance of maintaining competency throughout the professional career of the psychotherapist.

C.2.a. Boundaries of Competence

“Counselors practice only within the boundaries of their competence, based on their education, training, supervised experience, state and national professional credentials, and appropriate professional experience. Whereas multicultural counseling competency is required across all counseling specialties, counselors gain knowledge, personal awareness, sensitivity, dispositions, and skills pertinent to being a culturally competent counselor in working with a diverse client population.”

C.2.b. New Specialty Areas of Practice

“Counselors practice in specialty areas new to them only after appropriate education, training, and supervised experience. While developing skills in new specialty areas, counselors take steps to ensure the competence of their work and protect others from possible harm.”

C.2.c. Qualified for Employment

“Counselors accept employment only for positions for which they are qualified given their education, training, supervised experience, state and national professional credentials, and appropriate professional experience.

Counselors hire for professional counseling positions only individuals who are qualified and competent for those positions.”

C.2.d. Monitor Effectiveness

“Counselors continually monitor their effectiveness as professionals and take steps to improve when necessary. Counselors take reasonable steps to seek peer supervision to evaluate their efficacy as counselors.”

C.2.e. Consultations on Ethical Obligations

“Counselors take reasonable steps to consult with other counselors, the ACA Ethics and Professional Standards Department, or related professionals when they have questions regarding their ethical obligations or professional practice.”

C.2.f. Continuing Education

“Counselors recognize the need for continuing education to acquire and maintain a reasonable level of awareness of current scientific and professional information in their fields of activity. Counselors maintain their competence in the skills they use, are open to new procedures and remain informed regarding best practices for working with diverse populations.”

Using Transference to Help Your Client Grow

Clients often subconsciously transfer feelings towards someone in their past, onto the therapist. It is important for the therapist to maintain proper boundaries and self-awareness to recognize this common phenomenon. Often, client transference originates from their unresolved family issues and cultural upbringing.

One way to increase your self-awareness is through education. Research what types of reactions clients have with certain diagnoses. This way you will be more prepared in session when you encounter them.

As a counselor, you can decrease a client’s defensiveness when you point out your client’s transference in a reflective and empathetic manner. Rather than avoiding transference, which arises naturally, the counselor can utilize these feelings within themselves to direct and inform the work with the client. A part of the counselor’s job is to identify transference and interpret it to your client. Any transference can help your client gain awareness of their feelings, thoughts, and behaviors.

When transference happens, your job as the counselor is to not get caught up or attached to what is happening. Your own self-awareness can help act as a mirror, reflecting back to the client his or her emotions. It is best to have a curious attitude rather than a judgmental one when working with clients.

Remember that we all have preconceptions that can interfere with seeing each other clearly. Counselors and clients are going to be affected by one another.

Remember Your “Why”

Counselors can encounter doubts with their career choice as a counseling student, early in their careers, and even after many years of practice. Self-awareness can serve the counselor not only clinically but also personally.

Accessing this inner knowledge helps you connect with the reasons why you wanted to be a counselor in the first place. This reminds you why you chose to go to school or enter the field.

You may find your initial reason for entering the counseling field is not the same one as today. It is not unusual for your values to change over the time of your career. As you gain more experience, you grow and shift.

When you remember your “why,” you find purpose in the work you do. Your purpose becomes your professional identity. Knowing your personal “why” reminds you to hang in there when the clinical work gets tough and you need to find your direction again.

Four Ways to Build Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is one of those concepts that sounds easy, yet can be challenging to practice. Counselors can start by increasing self-care, practicing mindfulness or meditation, journaling, and seeking out support.

1. Increase Self-Care – NAADAC, the Association for Addiction Professionals Code of Ethics (2021) Principle III: Personal Responsibilities and Workplace Standards states,

“III‐18 Self‐Monitoring: Providers shall engage in self‐care activities that promote and maintain their physical, psychological, emotional, and spiritual well‐being.”

Self-care boundaries help you increase self-awareness by creating a distinct line between your inner experiences and those of your client. The more you care for yourself, the better able you are to be present and conduct therapy for others. It is important to give yourself times of silence and space away from the counseling work you do, in order to process and integrate. Make five to ten minutes each day to connect within, without any distractions.

2. Practice Mindfulness and Meditation – Mindfulness helps counselors become reflective rather than reactive, by keeping their focus on the present moment. This allows counselors the opportunity to release any triggering material from the client.

Mindfulness allows you to become aware of your feelings, thoughts, and behaviors, which could contaminate the counseling process. The more aware you are, the better able you can identify these sensations and thoughts as they arise. With this understanding, you can choose to release whatever internal blocks you have and move onto the next course of action.

Mindfulness and meditation help you learn how to observe your own thoughts and feelings without attaching a personal meaning to them. If you find you are having difficulty letting go of a certain sensation, thought, or feeling, take a mental or handwritten note of your reaction and revisit it later.

3. Journal Writing – Writing can help you reduce negative thoughts, emotions, and biases by focusing your internal experience outside of yourself onto the page. If you have made a notation during the session, later in the day you can explore your thoughts and feelings more in-depth through journaling.

After you have completed your writings, choose an alternative form of action through self-care, supervision, or your own counseling.

4. Connect with Support – It can often be helpful to gain an objective opinion from other counselors, whether it is through professional supervision, peer supervision, or your own counseling. Utilize professional and peer supervision, especially with challenging cases. Supervision sessions can help you identify countertransference and transference. Obtaining your own counseling can help you gain a different perspective, while you connect more in-depth with your feelings, thoughts, and biases. Cognitive-behavioral and affective techniques can help you reduce biased thoughts and emotions.

Lisa Hutchison, LMHC

Lisa Hutchison, LMHC

Lisa Hutchison , LMHC, is a licensed mental health counselor for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. She works for professionals who want to treat and prevent compassion fatigue. With over 20 years of psychotherapy experience, she helps her clients assert themselves, set boundaries, and increase their coping skills. Her specialty is decreasing stress, anxiety, and depression while increasing realistic methods of self-care for those who help others. Ms. Hutchison’s psychological advice has been featured in Reader’s Digest and the Huffington Post . Her articles have been published in numerous magazines, including Grief Digest and Today’s Caregiver .

Lisa is the bestselling author of I Fill My Cup: A Journal for Compassionate Helpers and a faculty member writer for NetCE. Her latest continuing education unit publication is “Setting Ethical Limits for Caring and Competent Professionals.” She has taught creative writing in colleges and presented on boundaries for the compassionate helper; the use of expressive art to heal grief, anxiety, and depression; inspirational and motivational topics; and creative writing techniques.

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Self-Awareness

Boost Your Practice: Self Awareness in Counseling Strategies

As counselors, we strive to provide the best care possible for our clients. To achieve this, it is essential to develop self-awareness in counseling. Self-awareness involves an understanding of our own thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, …

Written by: Larry Carter

Published on: August 20, 2023

Self Awareness in Counseling

As counselors, we strive to provide the best care possible for our clients. To achieve this, it is essential to develop self-awareness in counseling. Self-awareness involves an understanding of our own thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, which can aid in recognizing the same in our clients.

By incorporating self-awareness techniques into our practice, we can increase our empathy, improve our ability to self-regulate, and enhance our overall effectiveness. This article will explore the concept of self-awareness in counseling, the benefits of developing self-awareness, and strategies for improving self-awareness in counseling.

Key Takeaways:

  • Self-awareness is vital for counselors to improve their practice.
  • Developing self-awareness enhances empathy, self-regulation, and effectiveness.
  • Self-awareness techniques include mindfulness and reflection exercises.

Understanding Self Awareness in Counseling

Self-awareness is a crucial aspect of counseling that involves understanding one’s own thoughts, emotions, and biases. It allows counselors to recognize how their personal experiences and beliefs can influence the therapeutic process and enables them to respond more effectively to their clients’ needs.

Self-awareness is not only important for the counselor but can also benefit the client. When counselors are aware of their personal biases and emotions, they can better regulate them and provide a supportive and empathic environment for their clients.

Research has shown that self-awareness in counseling can lead to improved client outcomes, including increased client satisfaction, greater trust in the counselor, and reduced drop-out rates.

Some benefits of self-awareness for counselors include:

  • Improved empathy and understanding of the client’s perspective
  • Greater self-regulation, leading to better emotional management and reduced risk of burnout
  • Stronger therapeutic relationships with clients

Developing Self Awareness in Counseling

Self-awareness is a crucial aspect of effective counseling, yet it is a skill that requires continuous development. Counselors who prioritize developing their self-awareness can enhance their abilities to connect with clients and provide effective support. Here are some techniques and exercises that can help counselors develop self-awareness:

Self-Reflection

Self-reflection is the process of examining one’s thoughts, feelings, and actions in a non-judgmental manner. It can be done through writing, meditation, or simply taking time to think deeply. This practice helps counselors understand their own biases, triggers, and blind spots, providing a deeper understanding of themselves and their clients.

Journaling is another effective way to develop self-awareness. It involves writing down thoughts and feelings , allowing counselors to gain insight into their emotional states and thought processes. By tracking their experiences and reactions, counselors can identify patterns and gain a deeper understanding of themselves.

Mindfulness Exercises

Mindfulness exercises can help counselors develop present-moment awareness , enabling them to be fully present with their clients. These exercises can include deep breathing, body scans, and meditation. Practicing mindfulness can help counselors regulate their emotions and reduce stress, leading to more effective counseling sessions.

Supervision and Personal Therapy

Seeking supervision and personal therapy is an essential part of developing self-awareness. Supervision provides a space for counselors to discuss cases and gain feedback from experienced colleagues. Personal therapy gives counselors the opportunity to work through their own issues, improving their ability to support their clients.

By incorporating these techniques and exercises, counselors can develop their self-awareness and enhance their counseling abilities.

Enhancing Empathy through Self Awareness

Developing self-awareness can significantly enhance a counselor’s ability to empathize with their clients. By understanding and regulating their own emotions, counselors can better recognize and respond to the emotions of their clients. Here are a few strategies that can help enhance empathy through self-awareness:

Active Listening

Active listening involves paying close attention to what the client is saying, both verbally and non-verbally. This means avoiding interrupting the client and providing appropriate feedback to encourage them to continue to share their thoughts and feelings. Through active listening, counselors can better understand their client’s perspective and empathize with their experiences.

Perspective-Taking

Perspective-taking involves putting oneself in the client’s shoes and imagining their experiences from their point of view. This can be particularly helpful when working with clients from diverse backgrounds or with unique challenges. By attempting to see things from the client’s perspective, counselors can gain a deeper understanding of their experiences and respond more effectively.

Self-Compassion Exercises

Practicing self-compassion can help counselors develop greater understanding and empathy for their clients. Self-compassion exercises, such as self-care practices or self-reflection exercises, can help counselors develop greater compassion for themselves and, in turn, greater compassion for their clients.

“Empathy is about standing in someone else’s shoes, feeling with his or her heart, seeing with his or her eyes. Not only is empathy hard to outsource and automate, but it makes the world a better place.” – Daniel H. Pink

Integrating Self Awareness in Therapy

Integrating self-awareness in therapy sessions can greatly benefit both the counselor and the client. It creates a safe and welcoming space for clients to express their thoughts and emotions, while also enabling the counselor to create a more empathic and compassionate therapeutic relationship.

The first step to integrating self-awareness in therapy is for the counselor to be authentic and transparent with the client. This can be achieved through self-disclosure, wherein the counselor shares their personal experiences and emotions to create a more relatable connection with the client. However, it is important for the counselor to set clear boundaries and ensure that they are not over-sharing or taking away from the client’s experience.

Furthermore, counselors who practice self-awareness are able to recognize their own biases and limitations, and work towards creating a non-judgmental and accepting space for their clients. This allows clients to feel heard and validated, which can lead to a deeper understanding of their own thoughts and emotions.

Self-reflection is also an integral part of integrating self-awareness in therapy. Counselors who regularly engage in self-reflection are better equipped to understand their own emotions, thoughts, and reactions, which enables them to respond to clients in a more effective and empathic manner.

The Role of Self-Awareness in Therapeutic Outcome

Research has shown that counselors who are self-aware tend to have more positive therapeutic outcomes with their clients. This is because self-aware counselors are better able to manage their own emotions and reactions, which in turn allows them to be more empathic and compassionate towards their clients.

Self-awareness in therapy also helps counselors to recognize their own biases and limitations, which enables them to provide more personalized and effective treatment to their clients. It allows them to tailor their approach to each individual client, which can lead to more successful therapy outcomes.

Challenges and Limitations of Self Awareness

As crucial as self-awareness is to enhancing counseling skills, developing and maintaining it can be a challenging task. Counselors may face a range of obstacles that can impede their ability to become and stay self-aware. Two of the most formidable barriers to self-awareness are countertransference and blind spots.

Countertransference refers to the unconscious transfer of the counselor’s personal feelings or experiences onto the client, which can distort the counselor’s perception of the client’s needs and impair their ability to provide effective therapy. The subtle nuances of counseling relationships can make it difficult for counselors to recognize when they are experiencing countertransference.

Blind spots are those aspects of a counselor’s behavior or thinking that they are unaware of or fail to recognize as problematic. These blind spots can lead to ineffective therapy and potentially harm the client. The nature of blind spots makes them difficult to identify, as it requires a level of self-reflection and self-awareness that may be challenging for some counselors to achieve.

Overcoming Self Awareness Challenges

Fortunately, there are ways for counselors to overcome these challenges and continue developing self-awareness. One approach is to engage in regular self-reflection and introspection. Through journaling, contemplation, and mindfulness exercises, counselors can develop a deeper understanding of their thoughts, feelings, and motivations, which can help them recognize the signs of countertransference and identify blind spots.

Another effective way to develop self-awareness is to engage in regular supervision. In supervision, counselors can receive feedback and guidance from a more experienced colleague on their practice and gain new insights into their blind spots. Supervision can also provide a safe and supportive space for counselors to process and explore their countertransference experiences.

Personal therapy is also an important tool for counselors to develop and maintain self-awareness. Exposure to therapy as a client can help counselors gain a better understanding of the therapeutic process and how it feels to be vulnerable in the counseling relationship. It can also help them confront their personal issues and work through their blind spots.

In conclusion, self-awareness is a crucial element of effective counseling, and counselors must be aware of the challenges and limitations they may encounter when developing and maintaining this skill. However, with an ongoing commitment to personal and professional development and the utilization of tools like supervision and therapy, counselors can overcome these challenges and provide the best possible care for their clients.

The Impact of Self Awareness on Client Outcomes

Research has shown that a counselor’s self-awareness plays a significant role in the effectiveness of therapy and client outcomes. When counselors prioritize their personal growth and development, they are better equipped to provide clients with support and guidance.

One study found that counselors who integrated self-awareness in their practice were perceived as more empathic by their clients, leading to greater client satisfaction and engagement in therapy. Additionally, counselors who are self-aware are better able to manage their own emotions and reactions, which can positively impact the therapeutic relationship.

Through self-reflection and ongoing personal growth , counselors are able to identify and overcome their own biases and blind spots, leading to a more objective and client-focused approach. This can ultimately result in greater client progress and achievement of therapy goals.

It is important for counselors to engage in ongoing self-assessment and professional development to enhance their self-awareness and improve client outcomes. This may involve seeking supervision, attending trainings, and engaging in personal therapy, all of which can contribute to a counselor’s personal and professional growth .

In conclusion, the development of self-awareness in counseling is crucial for enhancing counseling skills and improving client outcomes. By understanding and exploring their own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, counselors can better understand and connect with their clients, resulting in a more empathetic and effective therapeutic relationship.

Through mindfulness techniques, reflective exercises, and ongoing self-assessment, counselors can continuously work on developing their self-awareness. Additionally, creating a non-judgmental and accepting therapeutic environment can further facilitate growth and change in clients.

Although developing self-awareness can be challenging and may present obstacles such as countertransference and blind spots, ongoing self-reflection and supervision can help counselors overcome these challenges.

Ultimately, prioritizing the development of self-awareness should be an integral component of a counselor’s professional development plan, as it can lead to improved counseling skills and positive client outcomes.

Q: What is self-awareness in counseling?

A: Self-awareness in counseling refers to the counselor’s ability to recognize and understand their own thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. It involves being conscious of one’s own strengths, limitations, biases, and values and how these may impact the therapeutic relationship and client outcomes.

Q: Why is self-awareness important in counseling?

A: Self-awareness is vital in counseling as it allows counselors to better understand themselves and how they may influence their clients. It helps counselors to identify and manage their own potential biases and triggers, allowing for a more effective and unbiased therapeutic relationship. Self-awareness also enhances empathy, self-regulation, and the ability to provide appropriate support and interventions.

Q: What are some strategies for developing self-awareness in counseling?

A: Some strategies for developing self-awareness in counseling include mindfulness techniques, reflection exercises, self-reflection through journaling, and engaging in personal therapy or supervision. These practices help counselors explore their own thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, leading to improved self-understanding and awareness of their impact on the therapeutic process.

Q: How can self-awareness enhance empathy in counseling?

A: Self-awareness in counseling can enhance empathy by enabling counselors to better recognize and understand their own experiences, emotions, and biases. This self-understanding allows for more accurate perspective-taking and a deeper understanding of the client’s worldview. It also helps counselors to respond with greater empathy, compassion, and sensitivity to the client’s needs and experiences.

Q: How can self-awareness be integrated into therapy sessions?

A: Self-awareness can be integrated into therapy sessions through the counselor’s self-disclosure, authenticity, and self-reflection. By openly sharing their own experiences and feelings when appropriate, counselors create a safe and trusting space for clients to do the same. The counselor’s self-awareness also allows them to recognize and process their own countertransference, providing a more accurate and empathic response to the client’s needs.

Q: What are the challenges and limitations of self-awareness in counseling?

A: Challenges of self-awareness in counseling can include potential blind spots, where counselors may be unaware of their own biases or triggers, and countertransference, where counselors may project their own emotions and experiences onto the client. Overcoming these challenges requires ongoing self-reflection, supervision, and continuing professional development to expand self-awareness and minimize potential limitations.

Q: How does self-awareness impact client outcomes in counseling?

A: Research has shown that the counselor’s self-awareness positively correlates with improved client outcomes and therapy effectiveness. When counselors have a deep understanding of themselves and their impact on the therapeutic process, they can provide more tailored and effective interventions, leading to better client engagement, satisfaction, and progress. Ongoing self-assessment and continuous professional development are important for maintaining and enhancing self-awareness.

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Self Awareness and the Effective Counsellor: A Framework for Assessment

Profile image of Max Uhlemann

2012, Canadian Journal of Counselling and Psychotherapy Revue Canadienne De Counseling Et De Psychotherapie

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self awareness in counselling essay

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Establishing an effective self-care habit is an important aspect to support a novice counsellor’s well-being and their counselling competencies. Novice counsellors would often encounter various challenges in the early period of their professional training. These challenges included unresolved personal issues, lack of professional experience, naive unawareness, rigorous training demands, role anxiety, scrutiny from professional gatekeepers, and the lack of preparation for treatment failure. Left unattended, these challenges could significantly impaired a novice counsellor’s well- being and their counselling competencies. Counselling competency is an integration of skills, knowledge, abilities, beliefs, motivation, procedure, behaviour, disposition, personality characteristics, self-perception, and motivation that enabled a counsellor to perform a task in various contexts. Self-care was a significant aspect to reduce the effects of burnout and to increase a counsellor’s counselling competency. Auto-ethnography was used to explore the researcher’s personal experience on self-care and counselling competencies during counselling practicum. The coding and thematic analysis process were conducted by Nvivo 11 for Mac. The major themes of the results were self-care and the experience of placements. The method of reflexivity in autoethnography was beneficial to identify and attend the researcher’s self-care needs. As the researcher attended her self-care needs, there was an increase in the researcher’s counselling competencies. It was recommended that personal self-care was to be complemented by organisational self-care. Further research would be required to understand other novice counsellors’ personal experience of self-care and counselling competencies in their counselling practicum. Keywords: self - care, novice counsellor, counselling competencies, placement, autoethnography

Jeffrey M Warren

Self-awareness represents the capacity of becoming the object of one's own attention. In this state one actively identifies, processes, and stores information about the self. This paper surveys the self-awareness literature by emphasizing definition issues, measurement techniques, effects and functions of self-attention, and antecedents of self-awareness. Key self-related concepts (e.g., minimal, reflective consciousness) are distinguished from the central notion of self-awareness. Reviewed measures include questionnaires, implicit tasks, and self-recognition. Main effects and functions of self-attention consist in self-evaluation, escape from the self, amplification of one's subjective experience, increased self-knowledge, self-regulation, and inferences about others' mental states (Theory-of-Mind). A neurocognitive and socioecological model of self-awareness is described in which the role of face-to-face interactions, reflected appraisals, mirrors, media, inner speech, imagery , autobiographical knowledge, and neurological structures is underlined.

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COUNS-EDU: The International Journal of Counseling and Education

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This research is begun based a purpose to increasing self-awareness of education personnel, so they can perform an excellent service for students in the university. This study aims to: (1) describe the module design to increase self-awareness of excellent service of education personnel (2) perform module validation tests and (3) perform module reliability tests. The study was descriptive involving four experts and 12 education staff at Padang State University as the subject of the trial. Instruments used to include (1) Validity Testing Instruments Module Contents (2) Ifdil & Taufik Self-Awareness Inventory and (3) Module Instruments. The results of this study reveal that the Self-Awareness Improvement Module for Excellent Services Education Personnel can be accepted and can be used for self-awareness programs for the staff in providing services.

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The terms of self-awareness and self-consciousness, which have been mentioned under various different names for centuries, they are also studied experimentally in social psychology. Within the concept of this study, the information about descriptions, raised theories, suggested concepts, significant studies and adjusted scales on these terms are reviewed from the perspective of social psychology. Although there are various different descriptions of these terms under various disciplines and a wide range of relevant literature, this study is approached only from the perspective of social psychology and limited with the most efficient studies included in the published social psychology literature. The review shall be an enlightening source for the researchers studying on social psychology and the self-concept and is concluded with suggestions on further research interests.

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Counselling and self-awareness

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Self-awareness is an essential component in the counselling process. It is necessary for a number of reasons. These will be discussed first before the questions of self-awareness itself are addressed.

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Burnard, P. (1994). Counselling and self-awareness. In: Counselling Skills for Health Professionals. Springer, Boston, MA. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-1-4899-3334-8_4

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What Is Self-Awareness? (+5 Ways to Be More Self-Aware)

self-awareness matters

While it may not be possible to attain total objectivity about oneself (that’s a debate that has continued to rage throughout the history of philosophy), there are certainly degrees of self-awareness. It exists on a spectrum.

Although everyone has a fundamental idea of what self-awareness is, we don’t know exactly where it comes from, what its precursors are, or why some of us seem to have more or less than others.

This is where the self-awareness theory comes in, offering some potential answers to questions like these.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Self-Compassion Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will not only help you increase the compassion and kindness you show yourself but will also give you the tools to help your clients, students, or employees show more compassion to themselves.

This Article Contains:

What is self-awareness theory, research on the topic, 4 proven benefits of self-awareness, 3 examples of self-awareness skills, 5 ways to increase your self-awareness, importance in counseling and coaching, meditation, mindfulness, and self-awareness, self-awareness & emotional intelligence, 4 tips for improving self-awareness in relationships, role in the workplace and leadership, self-awareness in students and children, a take-home message.

Self-awareness theory is based on the idea that you are not your thoughts, but the entity observing your thoughts; you are the thinker, separate and apart from your thoughts (Duval & Wicklund, 1972).

We can go about our day without giving our inner self any extra thought, merely thinking and feeling and acting as we will; however, we also can focus our attention on that inner self, an ability that Duval and Wicklund (1972) termed “self-evaluation.”

When we engage in self-evaluation, we can give some thought to whether we are thinking and feeling and acting as we “should” or following our standards and values. This is referred to as comparing against our standards of correctness. We do this daily, using these standards as a way to judge the rightness of our thoughts and behaviors.

Using these standards is a major component of practicing self-control, as we evaluate and determine whether we are making the right choices to achieve our goals.

This theory has been around for several decades, giving researchers plenty of time to test its soundness. The depth of knowledge on self-awareness, its correlates, and its benefits can provide us with a healthy foundation for enhancing self-awareness in ourselves and others.

According to the theory, there are two primary outcomes of comparing ourselves against our standards of correctness:

  • We “pass,” or find alignment between ourselves and our standards.
  • We “fail,” or find a discrepancy between ourselves and our standards (Silvia & Duval, 2001).

When we find a discrepancy between the two, we find ourselves with two choices: to work toward reducing the discrepancy or avoid it entirely.

Self-awareness theory (and subsequent research) suggests that there are a couple of different factors that influence how we choose to respond. Basically, it comes down to how we think it will turn out. If we believe there’s little chance of actually changing this discrepancy, we tend to avoid it. If we believe it’s likely that we can improve our alignment with our standards of correctness, we take action.

Our actions will also depend on how much time and effort we believe that realignment will take; the slower progress will be, the less likely we are to take on the realignment efforts, especially if the perceived discrepancy between ourselves and our standards is large (Silvia & Duval, 2001).

Essentially, this means that when faced with a significant discrepancy that will take a lot of consistent and focused work, we often simply don’t bother and stick to avoiding self-evaluation on this particular discrepancy.

Further, our level of self-awareness interacts with the likelihood of success in realigning ourselves and our standards to determine how we think about the outcome. When we are self-aware and believe there is a high chance of success, we are generally quick to attribute that success or failure to our efforts.

Conversely, when we are self-aware but believe there is a low chance of success, we tend to think that the outcome is more influenced by external factors than our efforts (Silvia & Duval, 2001). Of course, sometimes our success in realignment with our standards is driven in part by external factors, but we always have a role to play in our successes and failures.

Interestingly, we also have some control over our standards, such that we may alter our standards if we find that we don’t measure up to them (Dana, Lalwani, & Duval, 1997).

This is more likely to happen if we’re focused more on the standards than on ourselves; if we fail when we are focused on the standards more than our performance, we are more likely to blame the standards and alter them to fit our performance (Dana et al., 1997).

Although it may sound like merely shifting the blame to standards and, therefore, letting yourself off the hook for a real discrepancy, there are many situations in which the standards are overly strict. Therapists’ offices are filled with people who hold themselves to impossibly high standards, effectively giving themselves no chance of success when comparing themselves to their internal standards.

It’s clear from the research on self-awareness that it is an important factor in how we think, feel, act, and react to our thoughts, feelings, and actions.

Self Awareness – TalentSprout

Now, let’s shift our attention to research on the outcomes of being self-aware.

As you might imagine, there are many benefits to practicing self-awareness :

  • It can make us more proactive, boost our acceptance, and encourage positive self-development (Sutton, 2016).
  • Self-awareness allows us to see things from the perspective of others, practice self-control , work creatively and productively, and experience pride in ourselves and our work as well as general self-esteem (Silvia & O’Brien, 2004).
  • It leads to better decision making (Ridley, Schutz, Glanz, & Weinstein, 1992).
  • It can make us better at our jobs, better communicators in the workplace, and enhance our self-confidence and job-related wellbeing (Sutton, Williams, & Allinson, 2015).

self awareness in counselling essay

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self awareness in counselling essay

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So we know that self-awareness is good, but what does it look like? How does one practice self-awareness?

Below are three examples of someone practicing self-awareness skills:

Bob at work

Bob struggles with creating a quarterly report at work, and he frequently produces subpar results. He notices the discrepancy between his standards and performance and engages in self-evaluation to determine where it comes from and how to improve.

He asks himself what makes the task so hard for him, and he realizes that he never seems to have trouble doing the work that goes into the report, but rather, writing it up cohesively and clearly.

Bob decides to fix the discrepancy by taking a course to improve his writing ability, having a colleague review his report before submitting it, and creating a reusable template for future reports so he is sure to include all relevant information.

Monique at home

Monique is having relationship problems with her boyfriend, Luis. She thinks Luis takes her for granted and doesn’t tell her he loves her or share affection enough. They fight about this frequently.

Suddenly, she realizes that she may be contributing to the problem. She looks inward and sees that she doesn’t show Luis appreciation very often, overlooking the nice things he does around the house for her and little physical touches that show his affection.

Monique considers her thought processes when Luis misses an opportunity to make her feel loved and notes that she assumes he purposely avoids doing things that she likes. She spends time thinking and talking with Luis about how they want to show and receive love, and they begin to work on improving their relationship.

Bridget on her own

Bridget struggles with low self-esteem , which causes depressive symptoms. She doesn’t feel good enough, and she doesn’t accept opportunities that come her way because of it. She begins working with a therapist to help her build self-awareness.

The next time an opportunity comes her way, she thinks she doesn’t want to do it and initially decides to turn it down. Later, with the help of some self-awareness techniques, Bridget realizes that she is only telling herself she doesn’t want to do it because of her fear that she won’t be good enough.

Bridget reminds herself that she is good enough and redirects her thoughts to “what if I succeed?” instead of “what if I fail?” She accepts the opportunity and continues to use self-awareness and self-love to improve her chances of success.

These three stories exemplify what self-awareness can look like and what it can do for you when you tap into it. Without self-awareness, Bob would have kept turning in bad reports, Monique would have continued in an unsatisfying relationship or broken things off, and Bridget would never have taken the opportunity that helped her grow.

If you look for them, you can find these stories everywhere.

Ways to Cultivate Self-Awareness

There are many ways to build and practice self-awareness, but here are some of the most effective:

1. Practice mindfulness and meditation

Mindfulness refers to being present in the moment and paying attention to yourself and your surroundings rather than getting lost in thought or ruminating or daydreaming.

Meditation is the practice of focusing your attention on one thing, such as your breath, a mantra, or a feeling, and letting your thoughts drift by instead of holding on to them.

Both practices can help you become more aware of your internal state and your reactions to things. They can also help you identify your thoughts and feelings and keep from getting so caught up in them that you lose your hold on your “self.”

2. Practice yoga

Yoga is a physical practice, but it’s just as much a mental practice. While your body is stretching and bending and flexing, your mind is learning discipline, self-acceptance , and awareness. You become more aware of your body and all the feelings that manifest, and you become more aware of your mind and the thoughts that crop up.

You can even pair yoga with mindfulness or meditation to boost your self-awareness.

3. Make time to reflect

Reflecting can be done in multiple ways (including journaling; see the next tip) and is customizable to the person reflecting, but the important thing is to go over your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors to see where you met your standards, where you failed them, and where you could improve.

You can also reflect on your standards themselves to see if they are good ones for you to hold yourself to. You can try writing in a journal, talking out loud, or simply sitting quietly and thinking, whatever helps you to reflect on yourself.

The benefit of journaling is that it allows you to identify, clarify, and accept your thoughts and feelings. It helps you discover what you want, what you value, and what works for you. It can also help you find out what you don’t want, what is not important to you, and what doesn’t work for you.

Both are equally important to learn. Whether you like to write free-flowing entries, bulleted lists, or poems, writing down your thoughts and feelings helps you to become more aware and intentional.

5. Ask the people you love

It’s vital to feel we know ourselves from the inside, but external feedback helps too. Ask your family and close friends about what they think about you. Have them describe you and see what rings true with you and what surprises you.

Carefully consider what they say and think about it when you journal or otherwise reflect. Of course, don’t take any one person’s word as gospel; you need to talk to a variety of people to get a comprehensive view of yourself.

And remember that at the end of the day, it’s your self-beliefs and feelings that matter the most to you!

Self-awareness is a powerful tool that, when practiced regularly, can do more good for coachees and clients than anything else a professional can share with them. To make real, impactful, and lasting change, people need to be able to look inward and become familiar with that internal environment.

Building self-awareness should be a top priority for virtually all clients, after which the more traditional coaching and counseling work can begin. For example, you can counsel someone on their bad habits and give 1,000 ways to break their habits.

Still, if they don’t understand why they tend toward these bad habits in the first place, it’s almost a guarantee that they will either never break those habits or will quit for a while and simply pick up where they left off when things get tough.

Self-awareness is not only vital for the coachee or client; it is also important for the coach or counselor. In fact, self-awareness is prioritized as a core standard in the Council for Accreditation of Counseling and Related Educational Programs Standards (2017) for the profession, as both a requirement for counselors and a necessary skill to build in clients.

It takes a good amount of self-awareness to give competent counsel and provide actionable advice. Plus, self-awareness will help the caring counselor from getting too wrapped up in their client’s problems or seeing the issues through their own skewed lens.

To truly help someone, it’s essential to see things from their perspective, and that requires being self-aware enough to put our thoughts and feelings aside sometimes.

The link between meditation, mindfulness, and self-awareness is clear, meaning it’s no surprise that practicing the first two will naturally lead to more of the third.

When we meditate or practice mindfulness, we are paying attention to the things that can often get ignored in our busy day-to-day: the present moment and our own internal experience. Those who get to know their thought processes and patterns are more able to adapt and improve them, both by simply being aware of their processes and patterns and by giving themselves a mechanism for practicing and improving.

Indeed, a program intended to enhance self-awareness (among other things) through yoga and meditation resulted in a range of improvements, including more positive affect, less stress, greater mindfulness, enhanced resilience, and even greater job satisfaction (Trent et al., 2019).

Daniel Goleman

According to the most popular theory of emotional intelligence from psychologist and author Daniel Goleman (2001), self-awareness is not only crucial for emotional intelligence; it’s one of the five components.

These five components are:

  • Self-awareness
  • Self-regulation
  • Social skills

Other popular theories of emotional intelligence also include self-awareness as a core component, making it one of the factors that virtually all researchers and experts agree on (Goleman, 2001).

Self-awareness is a necessary building block of emotional intelligence; it is the building block upon which the rest of the components are built. One must have self-awareness to self-regulate, and social skills will be weak and of little use if you are not aware enough about when and how to use them.

If you’re looking to build your emotional intelligence, self-awareness is the first step. Make sure you have developed strong skills in self-awareness before giving the other elements your all.

Individuals do not want to be too similar or too dissimilar to others. They search for optimal distinctiveness (Brewer, 1991). Being too different and unaccepted can lead to stigmatization, prejudice, and isolation (Lynn & Snyder, 2002).

But being too similar can make you lose your sense of self. All humans have these competing needs to belong (Baumeister & Leary, 1995) yet stand out from others. People may vary in their need for uniqueness. Still, most people adjust their behaviors to set them apart when they feel too similar to others (Mengers, 2014).

In that respect, you can compare a person to an onion. Personal identities are at the core, with social identities building the different outward layers. Imagine, for example, you are traveling and asked where you are from. Answering the specific district you are from won’t relate to a person from a different continent, but telling your home country won’t differentiate you from others of the same nationality.

Other common social identities are race, ethnicity, religion, gender, sexual orientation, or age. Given the context, people can call their social identity to action, depending on their need to belong to or differ from a group (Brewer, 1991).

Individuals can fulfill their needs simultaneously by activating social identities associated with distinct groups, resulting in greater levels of wellbeing (Mengers, 2014).

Apart from benefits for personal wellbeing and life satisfaction, societies can benefit from encouraging distinctiveness (Lynn & Snyder, 2002). Open and accepting environments allow people to assert their uniqueness, engage in their interests and pursuits and fear negative consequences less (Mengers, 2014).

To know who you are and live authentically, you must also understand what you are not. Distinctiveness is an essential tool to help differentiate you from others. Openness and approval must be encouraged to enable individuals, especially teenagers, to thrive.

self awareness in counselling essay

If you want to be more like post-reflection Monique than pre-reflection Monique (referring to examples of self-awareness skills in action above), or if you’re going to help your clients with their relationship woes, here are some excellent tips for introducing more self-awareness within the context of a relationship:

1. Be mindful

Practice mindfulness, especially when interacting with your loved ones. Pay attention to the words they say, their tone, their body language, and their facial expressions. We often communicate far more information with the latter three than we do with our words alone. Give your loved ones your full attention.

Have regular discussions about the relationship. It’s important to keep things in perspective and ensure that nothing is falling between the cracks.

When you have regular conversations about your relationship with your loved ones, it’s much harder to avoid or ignore things that can turn into problems. It also helps you reflect on your part and come prepared to discuss your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors with your loved ones.

3. Quality time

Spend quality time together and apart. This is especially important for romantic relationships, as we often find ourselves spending most or even all of our free time with our spouse or partner. However much you love and enjoy spending time with your partner, everyone needs some quality time alone.

Make sure you and your partner are both getting some quality “me” time to think about what you want, what you need, and what your goals are. This will help you keep yourself from merging too much into your partner and maintaining your independence and stability.

Then, since there will be two independent, stable, and healthy adults in the relationship, it will be even more fulfilling and satisfying to both partners when they spend quality time together.

4. Be considerate

Share your perspective and consider theirs. It’s easy to get too caught up in our own perspective on things; however, healthy relationships require that we consider others’ needs in addition to our own.

To know what our loved ones need and to deliver on those needs, we must first identify and understand them. We do this by practicing our self-awareness and sharing that awareness with our friends and family.

If you never check in with your loved ones on their views or feelings, it can cause you to drift apart and inhibit real, satisfying intimacy. Ask your loved ones for their perspective on things and share your perspective with them.

self-awareness and self-love

It’s easy to see how self-awareness can lead to these outcomes in the workplace, as better self-evaluation naturally leads to improving the alignment between our actions and our standards, resulting in better performance.

According to Tasha Eurich (2018), self-awareness can be divided into two categories or types: internal self-awareness and external self-awareness.

Internal self-awareness is about how well we see ourselves and our strengths, weaknesses, values, etc., while external self-awareness is understanding how others view us with those same factors (Eurich, 2018). Good managers and leaders need both to perform well in their roles.

Although you might think that more experience as a leader and greater power in one’s role lead to better self-awareness, that may not be the case. Experience can be positive or negative in terms of learning and improving the self. Even positive experiences can lead one to attribute success to themselves when it may have had more to do with the circumstances, leading to false confidence.

In fact, only 10–15% of those in Eurich’s (2018) study displayed self-awareness, although most of us believe we are self-aware.

To improve self-awareness, Eurich (2018) recommends introspection , but with a focus on asking oneself the right questions. She notes that asking “why” might not always be effective, as many of our internal processes remain shrouded in our subconscious or unconscious minds; instead, asking “what” may lead to better introspection.

For example, instead of asking, “ Why do I fail at this task so often? ” you might ask yourself, “ What are the circumstances in which I fail at this task, and what can I do to change them? ” It’s not a foolproof method, but it can aid you in improving your self-awareness and increasing your alignment with your standards on certain activities.

self awareness in counselling essay

17 Exercises To Foster Self-Acceptance and Compassion

Help your clients develop a kinder, more accepting relationship with themselves using these 17 Self-Compassion Exercises [PDF] that promote self-care and self-compassion.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

Self-awareness isn’t just for managers and employees; it can also substantially benefit students, children, and adolescents. The same benefits that make us more productive in the workplace can make students more productive in the classroom and at home: better communication with teachers and peers, more confidence, and more satisfaction with performance can all lead to happier, healthier students.

These benefits also apply to advanced students. Increased self-awareness leads to more self-care in medical students (Saunders et al., 2007) and a better understanding of one’s strengths and capabilities along with a boost to emotional intelligence in law students (James, 2011).

In short, a little extra self-awareness can be of great benefit to anyone with the will to improve. This piece includes a description of self-awareness, an exploration of the theory of self-awareness, examples, and tips and tools you can use to boost your self-awareness. We hope you find this information helpful in increasing your self-awareness or that of your clients.

What exercises do you use to help build self-awareness ? What are some other benefits you’ve noticed? Let us know in the comments section below.

If you liked this post, head on over to our post about self-awareness books to further help you increase reflection.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Self Compassion Exercises for free .

  • Baumeister, R. F., & Leary, M. R. (1995). The need to belong: Desire for interpersonal attachments as a fundamental human motivation.  Psychological Bulletin, 117(3) , 497–529.
  • Brewer, M. B. (1991). The social self: On being the same and different at the same time.  Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 17(5) , 475-482.
  • Council for Accreditation of Counseling and Related Educational Programs. (2017). 2009 Standards. Retrieved from https://www.cacrep.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/2009-Standards.pdf
  • Dana, E. R., Lalwani, N., & Duval, S. (1997). Objective self-awareness and focus of attention following awareness of self-standard discrepancies: Changing self or changing standards of correctness. Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology , 16 , 359–380.
  • Duval, S., & Wicklund, R. A. (1972). A theory of objective self-awareness . Academic Press.
  • Eurich, T. (2018, January 4). What self-awareness really is (and how to cultivate it). Harvard Business Review . Retrieved from https://hbr.org/2018/01/what-self-awareness-really-is-and-how-to-cultivate-it
  • Goleman, D. (2001). Emotional intelligence: Issues in paradigm building. In C. Cherniss & D. Goleman (Eds.) The emotionally intelligent workplace. Jossey-Bass.
  • James, C. (2011). Law student wellbeing: Benefits of promoting psychological literacy and self-awareness using mindfulness, strengths theory, and emotional intelligence. Legal Education Review , 21 (2).
  • Lynn, M., & Snyder, C. R. (2002). Uniqueness seeking.  Handbook of Positive Psychology , 395-410.
  • Mengers, A. A. (2014). The benefits of being yourself: An examination of authenticity, uniqueness, and well-being .
  • Ridley, D. S., Schutz, P. A., Glanz, R. S., & Weinstein, C. E. (1992). Self-regulated learning: The interactive influence of metacognitive awareness and goal-setting. The Journal of Experimental Education , 60 , 293–306.
  • Saunders, P. A., Tractenberg, R. E., Chaterji, R., Amri, H., Harazduk, N., Gordon, J. S., … Haramati, A. (2007). Promoting self-awareness and reflection through an experiential mind–body skills course for first-year medical students. Medical Teacher , 29 , 778–784.
  • Silvia, P. J., & Duval, T. S. (2001). Objective Self-Awareness Theory: Recent progress and enduring problems. Personality and Social Psychology Review , 5 , 230–241.
  • Silvia, P. J., & O’Brien, M. E. (2004). Self-awareness and constructive functioning: Revisiting “the Human Dilemma.” Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology , 23 , 475–489.
  • Sutton, A. (2016). Measuring the effects of self-awareness: Construction of the Self-Awareness Outcomes Questionnaire. Europe’s Journal of Psychology , 12 , 645–658.
  • Sutton, A., Williams, H. M., & Allinson, C. W. (2015). A longitudinal, mixed-method evaluation of self-awareness training in the workplace. European Journal of Training and Development , 39 , 610–627.
  • Trent, N. L., Borden, S., Miraglia, M., Pasalis, E., Dusek, J. A., & Khalsa, S. B. S. (2019). Improvements in psychological and occupational wellbeing in a pragmatic controlled trial of a yoga-based program for professionals. Journal of Alternative & Complementary Medicine , 25 , 593–605.

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Counselling Tutor

Use of Self in Counselling

The therapeutic use of self in counselling is prevalent in the humanistic approach and relational approaches to counselling and psychotherapy.

The term use of self  in therapy refers specifically to the ways in which the therapist draws upon their own feelings, experiences or personality to enhance the therapeutic process.

In her book, The Therapeutic Use of Self: Counselling Practice, Research and Supervision , Val Wosket helpfully explains:

“Use of self involves the operationalisation of personal characteristics so that they impact on the client in such a way as to become potentially significant determinants of the therapeutic process.” (Wosket, 2016)

In order to work ethically, and in the interests of the client, the therapist’s use of self in counselling is employed thoughtfully and with therapeutic intent. The therapist must be reflective and reflexive in their approach.

Self-awareness

To consciously use ourselves in the therapeutic relationship, we must develop and nurture our self-awareness . If our responses and patterns remain outside of our awareness, we are unable to reflect on how they might be useful or detrimental to the therapeutic process.

Self-awareness and authenticity needed in the use of self in counselling - A double exposure image of a woman

"Authenticity and self-awareness go hand-in-hand... [they] allow for authentic and intuitive responses in our interactions with clients."

Personal therapy, counsellor supervisio n and other personal and professional development resources all contribute towards developing ourselves as reflective practitioners.

The Authentic Therapist

Carl Rogers emphasised the importance of a therapist’s authenticity in the therapeutic encounter, and indeed identified the therapist’s congruence as one of the six necessary and sufficient conditions for personality change. Authentic presence in the relationship is one of the most fundamental examples of use of self in counselling.

Authenticity and self-awareness go hand-in-hand; attunement to ourselves, our bodies and our experiencing allows for authentic and intuitive responses in our interactions with clients.

Examples of Use of Self in Counselling

Use of self in counselling may manifest in a number of ways. Here I consider and briefly explore some of the most prominent examples:

  • Presence – As we have already explored, the therapist’s authentic presence is central to the therapeutic encounter, and according to Rogers, is a facilitative element for client movement. Authenticity can model a new way of being for a client who struggles to access their own authentic self, and provides a relationship free from pretence, where difficult material can be explored safely.
  • Personal self-disclosure – The disclosure of personal information by the therapist can be a controversial issue. Some therapists prefer not to answer questions about themselves or their lives outside of the therapy room. Others argue that doing so can enhance the relationship and promote trust. There are no conclusive answers as to whether personal disclosure in the therapy room is helpful or detrimental to therapy. It is important that any disclosure is offered with the client’s needs in mind, and that the therapist asks themselves the question “Who does this disclosure serve?”. If there is no therapeutic benefit for the client, or there is a significant risk that the disclosure could be harmful, then it is likely to be better to refrain, and discuss the issue in supervision.

Use of self in counselling - open giving hands

"Authenticity can model a new way of being for a client who struggles to access their own authentic self, and provides a relationship free from pretence."

Free Handout Download

Therapeutic Use of Self

  • Relational self-disclosure – Relational self-disclosure refers to the therapist’s disclosure of feelings about what is occurring in the relationship in the here-and-now. For modalities which view the therapeutic relationship as central to the work, and even as a microcosm of what might be occurring for clients outside of the room, paying attention to what is happening in the relationship is especially important. When a therapist discloses their felt sense of the relationship, they are potentially offering a new perspective through which to view the process. Relational self-disclosure provides an opportunity for the therapist to reflect their sense of the client’s relational interactions whilst owning their own feelings and responses. This may be seen as less threatening than simply offering neutral observations or attempting to analyse the client. Wosket argues that relational self-disclosure can promote intimacy in the relationship, even where personal self-disclosure is kept to a minimum (Wosket, 2016).
  • Immediacy – Relational self-disclosure is likely to employ the therapeutic skill of immediacy. When the therapist uses immediacy, they make an intervention based on their experiencing in the moment, often inviting the client to consider what is happening in the here-and-now. Immediacy will usually involve sharing a feeling or an inclination and exploring it together in a therapeutic context. This skill requires a degree of intuition on the part of the therapist and trust in their own experiencing. This is where self-awareness is particularly important.
  • The therapist’s unconscious – Some of our feelings and experiences happen outside of our conscious awareness, and through self-reflection we can raise previously unacknowledged thoughts and feelings to our awareness. When it comes to our relationships with clients, this can happen in several different ways. Exploration of countertransference responses in supervision, work in personal therapy or even examining a timely dream could lead to a new insight about the therapeutic work. Whether or not these feelings and experiences are shared with a client (and it may not always be appropriate to directly share such experiences in the therapy room) engagement with our own unconscious material can be a very important part of how we use ourselves in the work.

Relational Depth and Use of Self

When working towards relational depth in therapy, Mearns and Cooper reason that the therapist’s willingness to be transparent in the relationship is key:

“...becoming more attentive to the whole of our clients, taking the risk of being transparent with them, inviting our clients to express themselves more fully and creating the kind of safe and containing environment in which clients may feel more willing to receive us.” (Mearns and Cooper, 2005)

From a relational perspective, ‘self’ as a tool for the therapeutic encounter enhances psychological contact between therapist and client, promotes trust and nourishes the therapeutic process.

Mearns, D. and Cooper, M. (2005) Working at Relational Depth in Counselling and Psychotherapy. London: SAGE.

Wosket, V. (2016) The Therapeutic Use of Self: Counselling practice, research and supervision. 2nd ed. Oxon: Routledge.

Further Reading

Rowan, J. and Jacobs, M. (2002) The Therapist’s Use of Self (Core Concepts in Therapy). Philadelphia, PA: Open University Press.

This article was written for Counselling Tutor by Erin Stevens.

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The Importance of Self-Awareness in Counselling

self awareness in counselling essay

Self-awareness is a crucial skill in counselling , aiding in understanding thoughts, emotions, and behaviours. It benefits both the client and the counsellor . Through self-awareness, counsellors:

  • Engage in personal growth by understanding their beliefs, values, and biases, which ensures effective sessions and management of personal reactions.
  • Enhance the therapeutic process, creating a safe environment for clients. Recognising their own triggers allows counsellors to be more empathetic, fostering trust and deeper client exploration.
  • Manage their emotions better, focusing on clients and minimising biases.
  • Drive their professional growth, refine their therapeutic techniques, and address personal blind spots.
  • Develop stronger therapeutic relationships by respecting and understanding clients’ diverse backgrounds.

Self-awareness enhances counselling effectiveness, promoting personal and professional growth, strengthening therapeutic relationships, and ensuring optimal client outcomes.

What is Countertransference?

Countertransference involves a therapist’s emotional reactions and biases during therapy, originating from psychoanalysis but now recognised across therapeutic modalities. While trained to remain objective, therapists have their emotions and experiences, which can lead to emotional responses towards clients, potentially mirroring clients’ feelings or projecting their issues onto them. This can affect therapeutic boundaries and processes.

Awareness of countertransference is vital, as it impacts therapeutic outcomes. Therapists must discern their emotions from their clients’ to avoid imposing their beliefs and remain client-centred. Regular supervision and personal therapy help therapists manage countertransference, offering insights and growth opportunities.

While countertransference can offer valuable client insights, it’s essential for therapists to stay self-aware, using such reactions as exploration tools without hindering therapy. Ultimately, therapists can provide more unbiased, effective client support by understanding and managing countertransference.

Using Transference to Help Your Client Grow

Transference, the unconscious transfer of feelings from past relationships onto a therapist, offers a potent opportunity for personal growth in counselling. 

Clients often replay old relational dynamics with their therapist, echoing feelings from past relationships. This allows therapists to delve into the client’s unconscious patterns and emotions. 

By navigating transference, therapists provide clients with a corrective emotional experience, helping reframe past traumas and foster healing. Therapists must ensure a safe therapy environment and awareness of their countertransference. Proficiency in handling transference, grounded in relevant theories, promotes client self-awareness and healing. When encountered, therapists should see transference as a chance for healing and growth.

How to Recognise and Avoid Biases

Recognising and mitigating biases is essential, especially in counselling, where unbiased support is critical. Biases can distort judgment and disrupt the therapeutic process. Professionals can pinpoint and address biases through self-awareness, self-reflection, and introspection. 

Seeking feedback from peers and clients offers insights into unrecognised biases, fostering personal growth. Exposure to diverse perspectives, literature, and cultural training expands understanding and challenges biases. Active listening, free from judgment, deepens client understanding. Challenging our assumptions and updating beliefs based on new information ensures effective client support. 

Addressing biases improves therapeutic outcomes, enhances professional competence, and promotes a just, empathetic society.

Having and Maintaining Competency

Competency is essential for professional counsellors, encompassing not just qualifications but also the ongoing refinement of skills. To maintain competency, counsellors should:

  • Stay updated with current developments, theories, and best practices through professional development activities like conferences and workshops.
  • Pursue additional training in areas of specialisation, offering tailored support to clients.
  • Engage in self-reflection and seek guidance from experienced professionals, identifying strengths, improvement areas, and biases.
  • Adhere to ethical guidelines and professional standards, ensuring integrity and professionalism.
  • Continuously evaluate their counselling methods using client feedback and assessment tools, adapting interventions for effectiveness.

Maintaining competency involves continuous learning, self-assessment, ethical practice , and evidence-based interventions, ensuring the highest quality care and positive client outcomes.

Remember Your “Why”

In counselling, recalling your “why” is vital – the core reason you entered this field. This deep-seated passion for aiding others can reignite your purpose, especially during challenges, keeping you resilient and focused. 

Embracing your “why” ensures authentic therapy interactions, fostering a trustful therapeutic relationship and enhanced outcomes. It offers perspective, reminding you of your larger impact and preventing burnout. 

Regularly revisiting your “why” and practising self-care in private practice promotes alignment with your values and continuous professional growth. In essence, your “why” is a grounding force in counselling, driving authentic, impactful practice for both client betterment and your own professional fulfilment.

Four Ways to Build Self-Awareness

Building self-awareness is critical to personal and professional development , especially in counselling. Self-awareness allows counsellors to understand better themselves and their emotions, which helps them navigate their own biases and better support their clients. 

If you’re looking to strengthen your self-awareness skills, here are four effective strategies to consider:

1. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness involves paying attention to the present moment without judgment. By engaging in mindfulness exercises, such as meditation or deep breathing, counsellors can increase their self-awareness by focusing on their thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations. This practice helps cultivate a deeper understanding of oneself and enhances the ability to respond consciously rather than instinctively.

2. Seek Feedback

Feedback or clinical supervision from others can be valuable in building self-awareness. Engage in open and honest conversations with colleagues, supervisors, or even trusted friends or family members about your strengths and areas for improvement. Actively solicit feedback from others and consider their insights objectively. This external perspective can offer valuable insights and help identify blind spots that may hinder your effectiveness as a counsellor .

3. Reflect on Personal Experiences

Reflecting on personal experiences can offer valuable insights into our emotions, triggers, and behaviour patterns. Setting aside regular self-reflection moments allows counsellors to understand better their internal experiences and how they may impact their counselling practice. Consider journaling or engaging in regular self-reflective practices to explore your beliefs, values, and reactions to various situations.

4. Engage in Personal Therapy

Personal therapy is a core component of the counselling profession. Counselling allows you to experience therapy from the client’s perspective and gain insights into your emotions, vulnerabilities, and barriers to growth. It provides an opportunity for self-exploration, helps identify unconscious biases, and enhances empathy and understanding toward clients. Personal therapy can be a transformative journey that strengthens self-awareness and improves your effectiveness as a counsellor .

Building self-awareness is an ongoing process that requires dedication and commitment. Incorporating these strategies into your daily routine can help you better understand yourself, enhancing your ability to connect with and support your clients. By cultivating self-awareness, you become a more effective counsellor and embark on a personal journey of growth and self-discovery.

How Software Can Help You Run Your Counselling Practice

Enhancing your self-awareness enables you to improve your effectiveness as a counsellor in your client interactions. WriteUpp, a cutting-edge practice management software , can streamline your practice and enhance your counselling journey.

Private practice software like WriteUpp is easy to use and affordable, and it lets you take client bookings online, reduce admin time, and improve the overall client experience. 

Learn more: Essential Systems and Processes for Healthcare Professionals

Because your software streamlines your admin, you’ll have more time to concentrate on building your practice and taking care of your clients. 

Basically, it’s there to save you time and worry!

You’ll spend less time looking for information, preparing notes, and writing client emails and text messages, giving you more time to grow your practice.

With just a few clicks, you can access a ton of features, including:

  • Taking bookings from your clients online, 24/7
  • Eradicating repetitive & time-consuming tasks
  • Accessing reporting to analyse your business income
  • Eliminating paper 
  • Improving your client’s experience 
  • Simplifying your compliance with key regulations like GDPR
  • Reducing the threat of virus transmission

You can grab us for a live chat if you have any questions about what an integrated practice management solution can do for you and your practice.

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Ellie is WriteUpp’s in-house Content Creator. Her research and writing for private practitioners focuses on marketing, business growth, data security, and more. She also hosts WriteUpp’s podcast The Healthy Practice; the show that guides practitioners in the early stages of their careers through every aspect of practice management. Outside of work Ellie writes a mental health blog, studies mindfulness and is a keen nature photographer.

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The Importance of Self-Awareness for Counselors

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