my aunt is my hero essay

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My Aunt Is My Hero: A Story of Love Spanning Beyond Parental Relations

Introduction.

Change of events in life can either work for or against one's fate. Here is a story of my life, "my aunt is my hero." The story revolves around my aunt who showed me with unconditional love. She was kind and good-hearted lady who did her best to re-establish happiness back in my life. She natured me just like my mother could have done or even better. I hold her dear to me for she made me believe that love can span beyond parental relationship.

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It began ten years ago when my family broke apart due to domestic violence. Initially, we used to live happily and together as a unit. The love between my parents was strong; thus, happiness prevailed. Great moments and stability prevailed for quite some time until my dad and mum started having a heated argument about infidelity. Things got worse after DNA test results showed that my dad was not my biological father. I have never seen my dad so angry, he could not believe that mum was unfaithful. He gave mum two options, either they get divorced or I move out of the family. The second option was favorable to both of them but very unfair to me, but my aunt decided to live with me. I hated the fact that I would be separated from my little sister. I had sleepless nights as I was haunted by nostalgic moments that we had with my family.

It was hard for me to adapt with a different life, living with a new family. I was used to shouting "mommy" anytime I felt like. It was evident to my aunt that I was mentally unstable, she tried everything to make sure that I at least wear a smile on my face but I could not afford one. She used to prepare some delicious cakes every day after school. One day after school, I asked her if I could be calling her mum. She took me in her hands, hugged me and broke into tears. I really enjoyed the way my aunt called me "my son". I felt confident in her and I told her everything that disturbed me. There existed no more secrets between us. She used to take me through my homework and later tell me a story before going to bed. Anytime I missed my mother and sister she hugged and reassured me that one day I would see them.

My academic performance was deteriorating despite the fact that I used to read daily. My aunt used to encourage me that things will be better even if I had no hope. The dreams that I believed for so long about my future were fading away. I felt lost and empty. She kept on promising change like it was so obvious to achieve. She did not give up with me until the change she confidently promised came true. This was a new beginning for my life as I fully understood that it is only me who can shape my future. I became fond of her love and care. I felt happy while in her companionship. I consider her my hero. It is my responsibility to make sure that she is always happy and she feels appreciated.

In conclusion, it is with indisputable evidence that I firmly believe that my aunt is my hero. My aunt supported me emotionally and socially. She gave me a shoulder to cry on and fought so hard to make sure that my dreams come true. I never believed that I could get so much love from my aunt. To pay it forward, I decided to love my cousins unconditionally, just the way I love my blood sister.

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My Top Inspirations

I think everyone knows that one person in their family that somehow manages to keep the entire rest of the family afloat. Whether it be dispelling tension or making sure everyone has what they need, that family member always remains calm and warm towards all. In my case, my aunt is the anchor of our extended family. My aunt, who I call Vinda Pachi, is one of the most calmest, stoic, and considerate people that I know. Over the years, she has taught me the importance of being humble and always doing the right thing not for the intention of getting attention but rather for the sake of being honorable. Like my grandmother, my aunt lives in India, so I only get to see her, at the most, every other year. However, every time I go to India, I talk to her as if I see her every day. Since I can remember, I have many memories of me telling her all my “problems”, worries, and dreams while she made breakfast and lunch for everyone. As she cooked, she would always lend excellent advice, comfort, and helpful criticism when needed. I knew I could tell her anything, even if it was extremely embarrassing or something she would disapprove of. Sometimes, I would even confide in her about things I hadn’t even told my parents. My aunt was always the ultimate guidance counselor and mom for me, and I hope that one day I can lend such sage to advice to a younger family member or friend.

I feel I really began to appreciate my aunt when I saw how gracefully and diligently she took care of my grandmother, not the same grandmother I spoke of last week. My grandmother was an extremely compassionate and loyal person to our family, but as she had gotten older, she had become more difficult to take care of. Unfortunately, my grandmother, who I called Pappama, was not always the most patient or understanding person, and when frustrated, she would often take her anger out on my aunt. While many other family members often got frustrated with my grandmother or talked back to her, my aunt always remained calm and never held a grudge against her. I have never seen someone be so understanding towards someone who treated them badly at times. When my grandmother became terminally ill, the need for my aunt’s constant care and love for my Pappama increased exponentially. My aunt had to travel long distances to see my grandmother in the hospital, cook her mashed food, and make sure my grandmother had everything she needed. Even though the experience was draining for the entire family, especially for my aunt and uncle, my aunt never complained, and continued to exhaust herself taking care of my grandmother until my grandmother took her last breath. After hearing all that my aunt and uncle went through in ensuring my grandma lived her last few months peacefully, I had a newfound respect for my aunt. She had handled a horrible and depressing situation with dignity and perseverance, and I will always admire her for that.

3 thoughts on “ My Aunt ”

Your aunt reminds me so much of my aunt! My aunt lives in Connecticut, and while that is definitely not as far as India, I do not get to see her as often as I would like too. It is really great that your aunt took care of your grandma as she was getting older. That is a hard job and one that requires love and patience. I hope your aunt is doing well and you get to see her again soon. Great post.

Your aunt seems like a really great women and it was inspirational to read about how she took care of your grandmother with no complaints even when she wasn’t very nice. It takes a special kind of person to take care of someone that is terminally ill. I don’t really talk to any of my aunts very much so I don’t quite know what it’s like to have someone other than my parents to talk to, but, from reading your blog, it sounds great and I’m glad you have someone like that. It must’ve been so scary when she had the stroke and heart attack but like you said, she probably pulled through because of all the great deeds she has done.

Your aunt seems like a she has such a beautiful soul. To have the ability to be so compassionate and understanding despite all that she has been through speaks greatly to her character. I believe that everyone needs someone like that in their lives. You should always have someone who can be there for you no matter what. As I get older, I truly strive to be a person like your aunt. I am glad that she made it through the stroke and heart attack, because to lose someone like her would be truly tragic.

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• My Grandmother

How to Write an Essay About My Hero

Writing an essay is difficult, but if it is about your favourite hero, it becomes even more challenging. You have to describe the main character, their heroic actions, and the unique skills that set them apart. A lot depends on the hero you have chosen to write an essay on. The first question that comes to your mind is who is your hero and why? It could be heroes or fighting soldiers from the war or a hero from a fictional story or your favourite cartoon movie. Once you have decided on the central figure of your essay, you can now describe and narrate all relevant details regarding your hero. The resilience, the character, and the personal traits that distinguish a common person from a hero can be elaborately discussed in the essay. If you are still in a fix and are wondering how to write an essay about my hero, then you have landed on the right page as we are about to give clear instructions on how to pen down a great compelling hero essay on your own. All you have to do is follow these simple guidelines and hints:

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Importance of Hero Essays

Catchy titles for an essay about my hero, how to get the best hero essay, how to start a hero essay, tips concerning writing a hero essay introduction, how to write body paragraphs, how to write conclusion for a hero essay, short example of a college essay about my hero.

Heroes or heroic figures have a great impact on the minds of young souls. Children who view cartoons and watch heroic actions of their favourite characters like to adopt their traits. That is why when writing a heroism essay, it becomes imperative to reflect on the qualities these heroes exhibit truly. This helps narrate how heroes transform the lives of ordinary people through their special attributes, chivalry, and characteristics. Some superheroes like Spiderman and Ironman depict special powers and are most children’s favourite. Children also consider authority figures like their father to be a superhero who can solve all kinds of problems and always help them.

Writing such kind of essays instil a sense of love and pride for their superheroes. Since students love their superheroes and look up to them for guidance, they would like to describe all the good qualities of their heroes. Writing an essay about my hero helps them use describing words and good writing skills, which will, in turn, help them excel in their life.

There are plenty of hero essay ideas you can choose from. If you are wondering how to write a title and heading for your hero essay, these shortlisted titles will surely help you.

• My Father: My Hero
• Heroes of the Second World War
• What Makes Superman a Superhero?
• Traits that Distinguish an Ordinary Man from a Hero
• Top Qualities of a Hero
• True Legends of Time
• Heroes for a Cause
• Life of Nelson Mandela
• Who is my Role Model?
• Finding Your Hero

Wondering how to write my hero essay outline? Here is a simple guideline that will help you organize your content professionally. Writing an essay outline, you must go through a proper format to convey all the points in an easy, coherent manner. You should be able to put it in the following way:

Introduction

In the heroes essay introduction, there should be a statement describing a hero's life and the attributes that make a hero. In the introductory paragraph, you should describe your hero briefly and what makes your hero different from other superheroes.

The other element important in the outline is background. Inform the reader about the heroic acts and details set against the background. If it is the entire life history you wish to explain, then mention it in the background.

Attributes of a Hero

Once you have explained the background information and the setting, you should now mention the characteristics and attributes of the hero. In this part of the essay, the positive and negative aspects of the hero should be properly explained.

Acts of Heroism

What are the different heroic acts or special powers that set your hero apart from other superheroes? When writing the heroes definition essay, you should put together the acts of heroism.

The concluding paragraph should sum up the details about your hero.

When writing an introduction, you should keep in mind the special powers of your hero. Don’t write down everything in the introduction. Here are some tips you should keep in mind:

• Keep it simple
• Choose your superhero
• Write it in a statement form
• Mention the key points that differentiate your hero from others

It should have the suggested length. The body paragraphs can comprise 3-4 paragraphs depending upon your content. It should have complete details and mention the special features and attributes of the hero you selected. You can break down the body paragraph into different points. In one paragraph, you can explain the setting, background, life history of the superhero. In the other consecutive paragraphs, you should explain the special features and attributes.

For a compelling who’s your hero essay conclusion, you must sum up the essay. Write down all the points that tie the essay together. From the beginning to the end, everything in the essay should be conveyed in a gist. A good conclusion leaves a great impact on the mind of the reader.

Finalizing Essay

Once you have written down everything, now is the time to finalize your essay. Make sure to edit, proofread, revise and provide citations where necessary.

Essay Revision

Revise your essay. Read it out loud. When you read the essay, you will be able to find mistakes.

Essay Proofreading

Proofread the essay. Keep a check on the grammatical errors and typos. There should be no mistakes. Students who have tight deadlines tend to miss this part and are in a hurry to submit their work. This might show serious issues in the essay, which will reflect badly on your work.

Make Citations

Write down the references. While writing down the essay, if you have taken from different sources, then you should mention it. These citations and references show varied sources from where you have taken material for your essay. It also reflects your researching skills.

An essay on my hero example is as follows:

For instance, your topic is ‘My father, my hero!’ Here is how you should begin writing your essay.

My father is a gem of a person. He knows how to take care of his family in times of distress. Apart from this, he is a great teacher, impacting the lives of millions of people. His noble ways of teaching and sharing knowledge make him a superhero not only for me but for all those people whose lives he touched.

My father had a small family. He was the only son of his parents. His parents loved him but were very strict. His childhood days were carefree, but he was a responsible kid, aware of his duty towards his parents. He would never disobey them. His love was unconditional for his parents, and he would go out of his way to serve them. Since he did not have his siblings to support him, he led quite a lonely life. He was a self-made man who struggled in his early years to make a name of himself. His teachers loved him for his honesty and intelligence.

As he grew up to be a man, he was loyal to his job and family. He left no stone unturned in serving his aging parents. He got married and had kids. His love continued to grow for his family. For the sake of our happiness, he would sacrifice his little acts of happiness. He would feel happy when we were happy. The students he taught learned acts of graciousness and nobility from him. They would yearn to be like him, striving in little ways to become a personality he would cherish. Simple acts of kindness made him a superhero. He became a hero in my eyes and in the lives of all those people he affected in one way or the other.

From the milkman to the newspaperman, every person would greet him with great respect. The respect he earned showed how loved and revered he was. His altruism, chivalry, and bravery were exhibited in daily activities. He was a man of integrity, values, and principles. All these things and a lot more made him different from other superheroes. He was neither a celebrity nor an action hero, but he was a great man of spirit who lived in people's hearts.

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77 My Hero Essay Topic Ideas & Examples

🏆 best my hero topic ideas & essay examples, 📌 most interesting my hero topics to write about, 👍 good research topics about my hero, ❓ heroes essay questions.

• Celebrities as Good Role Models In the conclusion, it was affirmed that celebrities’ accomplishments are easily identifiable to the public, as is the case with Angelina and Oprah, and this makes them good role models.
• Role Model: Nelson Mandela Through the African National Congress party, Mandela was determined to undergo any form of suffering for the sake of the South Africans blacks who were facing a lot of suffering at the hand of apartheid. We will write a custom essay specifically for you by our professional experts 808 writers online Learn More
• Willy Loman, a Poor Role Model to His Two Sons Biff and Happy The main theme in the play is sustained in the play with the sons of Willy attaining their personality from their father.
• Stereotyping Heroes in Cinema In mass media, representation usually involves the use of art and signs to change the concept of concrete reality, hence leading to stereotyping of characters and heroes in movies and other non-fiction programs from a […]
• My Hero: Bob Marley One of the things I admire the most about him is the possession of skills and the right attitude to influence positive change in society.
• Mythological and Modern-Day Heroes Myths and other forms of literature were the tools that the community used to pass the deeds of the heroes from one generation to the other.
• Father as a Male Role Model During the days when schooling was considered to be accessible only to the children of the opulent, those who were not privileged enough to go to school, remained at home and helped their parents in […]
• Education and Leadership Role Modeling Generally, the article is of great significance to education, for it provides a guideline on what leadership trainers should emphasize in their endeavors of ensuring that education builds all round and sound mind leaders, who […]
• Significance of a Male Role Model for Forming Tomas and Gabe’s Personal It is possible to pay attention to Tomas and Gabe’s visions of masculinity referring to the ideas developed by Tomas in relation to the question, to the opinion which is characteristic for Gabe, and to […]
• Parents as Failed Role Models: A Doll’s House and Fight Club The drinking culture of parents revealed in the story of the Fight Club underscores the elements that increase children’s exposure to alcohol and drug taking.
• The Life and Work of Jane Goodall, a Scientist and Role Model
• An Overview of the Reasons Why President Clinton Is a Role Model for Young People
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• A Feminist Role Model in the Character of Catherine Earnshaw
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• Oprah ‘s Role Model For Women Breaking Down Many Invisible
• Tennyson’s Ulysses as a Victorian Role Model
• The Police Officer as a Role Model for Children
• Role Of A Role Model For Employees
• Why Rey Is the Female Role Model I’ve Always Wanted
• The Role Model Qualities Shown by the Finchs’s Maid in To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
• Professional Athletes Should Be Role Model to Kindergartners in Modern Society
• Holden Caufield as a Role Model in The Catcher in the Rye
• Why I Chose Martin Luther King as My Role Model
• The United States as a Role Model Government
• Women Rhetoricians’ Role Model and Pan Chao
• What Makes A Role Model Like A Good Outlook
• The Constitution of India is a Role Model for The World
• The Importance Of A Good Leader And A Role Model On The Team
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• True Grit Is Not A Good Role Model For Young Women Today
• What Is the Concept of a Hero?
• How Do Heroes Inspire Us?
• What Is a Hero in Real Life?
• What Is the Importance of a Hero?
• What Is a Good Hero Statement?
• How Do Heroes Improve Our Lives?
• What Is a Hero to Humanity?
• What Are the Characteristics of the Hero?
• What Made a Person a Hero?
• What Is a Hero Leader?
• Is It Important to Have a Role Model That Influences a Person’s Life?
• Who Is the Greatest Hero in History?
• What Does a Hero of Our Time Mean?
• What Are the Qualities of a Hero?
• What Are the Ways to Be a Hero?
• What Makes a Hero Powerful?
• What Makes a Strong Role Model?
• What Are Role Models Responsible For?
• Why Are Role Models Important to Identity?
• What Are the Types of Heroes?
• Who Is the Best Positive Role Model?
• What Can Be a Positive Role Model in the Workforce?
• What Is the Difference Between Ancient and Modern Heroes?
• What Is an Anti-hero?
• How Are Heroes and Villains Represented in Films?
• How Did Education Affect the Success of Forbes Heroes?
• What’s the Difference Between Imperfection and Cultural Heroes?
• Chicago (A-D)
• Chicago (N-B)

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Essay on My Hero

Students are often asked to write an essay on My Hero in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on My Hero

Who is my hero.

My hero is my mom. She is the most important person in my life. She is always there for me, no matter what. She works hard to take care of our family.

Why is She My Hero?

She is my hero because she is brave. She never gives up, even when things are tough. She always finds a way to make things better. She is also kind and caring. She helps others without asking for anything in return.

What Makes Her Special?

She is special because she is selfless. She always puts others before herself. She is also very wise. She teaches me important lessons about life. She helps me become a better person every day.

My Hero’s Influence on Me

My mom’s bravery and kindness inspire me. I want to be like her when I grow up. She is my role model. I am lucky to have such a wonderful hero in my life. I love my mom, my hero.

250 Words Essay on My Hero

My hero is my father. He is the person who I look up to the most. He is not famous or a superhero from a comic book, but he is a hero in my eyes.

Why is My Father My Hero?

My father is my hero because he is hardworking, caring, and brave. He works long hours to provide for our family, yet he always has time for me. He helps me with my homework, listens to my worries, and encourages me to do my best. He is caring and always puts our needs before his own.

Bravery of My Hero

My father is also brave. He is not afraid to stand up for what is right, even if it is hard. He taught me to be honest, kind, and respectful to others. He leads by example and shows me how to be a good person.

Lessons from My Hero

From my father, I have learned the importance of hard work, honesty, and kindness. He has shown me that it is not always easy to do the right thing, but it is always worth it. He is my role model, and I hope to be as brave and caring as he is.

In conclusion, my father is my hero. He may not wear a cape or have superpowers, but he is a hero in his own right. He is hardworking, caring, brave, and teaches me valuable lessons. I am grateful for him and proud to call him my hero.

500 Words Essay on My Hero

Introduction.

Every person has a hero, a person they look up to and admire. For me, that hero is my mother. She is the one who has had a huge impact on my life. My mother is my hero because she is brave, caring, and hardworking.

One of the main reasons why my mother is my hero is her bravery. She has faced many challenges in her life, but she never gives up. When she was younger, she moved to a new country all by herself. She did not know the language or the culture, but she was brave and learned quickly. This showed me that it’s okay to face new things, even if they are scary. It’s okay to be brave and try something new.

Caring Nature

My mother is also my hero because she is very caring. She always puts others before herself. She takes care of me and my siblings, always making sure we have what we need. She also helps out in our community, volunteering at local events and helping those in need. Her caring nature has taught me the importance of kindness and helping others. It’s shown me that being caring and kind can make a big difference in the world.

Hardworking Spirit

Lastly, my mother is my hero because she is hardworking. She has a full-time job, but she also takes care of our family and our home. She wakes up early in the morning and works late into the night. She never complains about being tired or having too much to do. Her hardworking spirit has taught me the value of hard work and dedication. It’s shown me that if you work hard, you can achieve your goals.

In conclusion, my mother is my hero. Her bravery, caring nature, and hardworking spirit have had a huge impact on my life. She has taught me important lessons and has helped shape the person I am today. I am grateful for everything she has done for me. She is not just my mother, but also my hero.

This essay shows that heroes are not always famous people or characters from a book. They can be ordinary people like our parents, who show us every day what it means to be brave, caring, and hardworking. These are the true heroes in our lives.

That’s it! I hope the essay helped you.

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Home — Essay Samples — Life — My Heroes — My Mother is My Hero

My Mother is My Hero

• Categories: Idol Mother My Heroes

About this sample

Words: 610 |

Published: Feb 8, 2022

Words: 610 | Page: 1 | 4 min read

Works Cited

• Johnson, M. (2018). Parental Influence and Role Models in Adolescence. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 27(7), 1939-1951.
• Smith, R. (2016). The Importance of Parental Support in Adolescence. Journal of Youth Studies, 19(3), 369-385.
• Brown, S., & Manning, W. D. (2017). Family Boundary Ambiguity and Parent-Child Relationships: The Mediating Role of Parental Role Fulfillment. Journal of Marriage and Family, 79(2), 613-628.
• Williams, S. K., & Fredrickson, B. L. (2018). Mother-Child Relationships and Emotional Well-being: Associations of Positive and Negative Affection with Emotion Regulation and Depression. Journal of Family Psychology, 32(7), 909-919.
• Brooks, J., & Goodall, J. (2019). Teacher-Student Relationships: Adding a Touch of ‘Mothering’ to Effective Teacher Pedagogy. Teaching and Teacher Education, 83, 43-53.
• Steinberg, L. (2014). The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-teen-doctor/201402/the-ten-basic-principles-good-parenting
• Walsh, F. (2016). Family Resilience: A Framework for Clinical Practice. Family Process, 55(4), 550-566.
• National Alliance on Mental Illness. (n.d.). Understanding Depression. Retrieved from https://www.nami.org/learn-more/mental-health-conditions/depression
• Migraine Research Foundation. (n.d.). Migraine in Children and Teens. Retrieved from https://migraineresearchfoundation.org/about-migraine/migraine-in-children-and-teens/
• Sewing.com. (n.d.). Sewing for Beginners: Learn How to Sew with These Basic Lessons. Retrieved from https://www.sewing.com/sewing-for-beginners/

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Oral History Essay/Transcript

• Post author By Waneshka Mendez
• Post date April 10, 2024
• No Comments on Oral History Essay/Transcript

Waneshka Mendez  

Engl1100 

Prof Lobell  

Me: What is your name  

Aunt: Ana  

Me: When and where were you born? 

Aunt: I was born In Dominican Republic in 1962. 

Me: What languages do you speak? 

Aunt: I speak Spanish. 

Me: Where did you grow up? 

Aunt: DR. I lived there until I was 28.  

Me: How did you grow up? 

Aunt: Well, in total we were 10 siblings. My mother died when I was 6. At that time, my father was a farmer. With my mom’s passing he left that job and sold most of his property to be able to rent out a store closer to where we lived. This was his way of being able to raise us. My uncle played a crucial role in our childhood. He helped my dad out when he was working. When people came to our house, they would think we were being raised like animals in which you could ask to have one of us. But my father never separated us. He was our mom and dad; he gave us advice and taught us the ways of God. The love he gave us was enough to fill the void of our mom. When we made a mistake, he would explain what we did wrong in a way we would understand depending on our age. For all the good we did he would celebrate. Despite not having a lot of necessities and being poor, we were all happy. We had an unimaginable childhood.  

Me: What jobs have you had? What is your current job status? 

Aunt: I was a professional hairdresser. I am disabled now so I don’t work. 

Me: Where did you first settle here? Why? 

Aunt: When I first arrived here, I came with my daughter who at the time was a year old. I settled in Washington Heights because it was the only place in which I had a family member. My brother welcomed both me and my daughter with open arms.  

Me: What was the biggest difference between the two countries? 

Aunt: The temperature. I landed on January 15, so it was very cold for me let alone my daughter. As well as I did not have as much help with my daughter as I did before I came.  My brother helped as much as he could but there wasn’t much he could do. The language barrier was also very difficult. The salon I worked at was not in a predominately Spanish speaking neighborhood, so I was bound to come across people who didn’t speak Spanish at all. So, communicating with my clients was very challenging.  

Me: What was the most difficult part about moving?  

Aunt: The most difficult part of moving here was moving away from most of my family. As I said earlier at the time of my arrival, I only had my brother. Despite all the help he offered, it was still very hard for me to adjust to a new environment. 

Me: How important is religion to you?  

Aunt: Personally, religion is very important to me because growing up I was told through any ups and downs turning to God will help you prosper and give you the strength you need to continue. I really became more of a religious person after coming to America because it was hard to want to continue when it felt like everything was pinned against you. Having to start from scratch for two wasn’t easy. So, every time I felt like giving up, I turned to God in hopes he would give me the strength I needed to persevere. 

Me: What traditions do you have with your family?  

Aunt: The only tradition we really had was to celebrate anything. Birthdays, easter, Christmas, etc. Even if it wasn’t a big party, there would always be some sort of food made in a buffet style. Praying daily was also a big part of my life.  

Me: Did you pass on these traditions?  

Aunt: Yes. With my daughter I taught her the importance of religion. In my eyes if she sought a relationship with God, she will always be safe and never make any bad decisions. I taught her to consider whether whatever she wants to do would be seen as a good or bad thing in life. I never raised my voice at her or turned to violence to discipline her, just like my father I would explain her wrongdoing in a way she would understand. I taught her besides any negative you have going on in your life, turn to God and he’ll fix it for you. As for the celebrations, I celebrated all her successes and birthdays and significant events. Even if I couldn’t afford it.  

Me: What’s the biggest difference in the economy now than from when you first came? 

Aunt: Honestly everything is way more expensive now. 

Me: What’s one piece of advice you would give to future generations? 

Aunt: Never let any obstacle get in the way of achieving anything you want. Do not waste your time trying to make other people’s dreams come true, pursue your own dreams and don’t always please others. 

Not going to lie being able to complete this assignment quickly became more challenging than I expected it to become because life happens. The person I felt most comfortable with interviewing ended up experiencing serious medical problems, whenever she was available, I wasn’t and vice versa. Nevertheless, my work managers contacted me basically informing me that the store was closed and that I had the day off, which worked out perfectly because I was able to sit down and take my time to interview her. Before writing the transcript, I was going to have a voice recording, but she got a little too emotional and asked me if that there was another way I could present it, and if there was if I could shorten her answers. Despite all the challenges I faced getting started I was still able to learn a lot about how her life played out from an early age. Even though we are very comfortable and have a close relationship she has never gone into so much detail about her past, family, and upbringing.  

Honestly I just asked her the questions and allowed her to go in any direction she wanted with them. I allowed her to answer the questions however she interpreted the questions. Some of the things I learned more information about was the fact that her mom had passed away at such an early age. She had told me that her family struggled throughout her childhood, but I didn’t know that her dad had to give up so much just to raise them. As mentioned previously, there were some things that were left out of the transcript such as the fact that there were 5 boys and 5 girls, but the girls were being raised as housewives. Which entailed them cooking, cleaning, and taking care of the men even though they were younger. While the men were being taught to work physical labor jobs and take care of the household financially. She went into detail about how she tried to provide a gentle parenting style to her daughter the same way her father did for her, but she wasn’t able to teach her anything besides cooking, cleaning, and caring for other because that’s how what she was taught. I later came to find out that most of the things her daughter knows were self-taught, besides stereotypical housewife’s duties. I was always under the impression that my aunt was the one to teach her daughter everything she knew. Furthermore, the same way my aunt’s father had to play the role of mom and dad she had to do the same thing for her daughter. Even though my aunt made the decision to leave her family behind to start a new life in America she never forgot about her family and always looked out for them. For example, the same way her brother was able to bring her here she did the same for the rest of her siblings. I have never seen my aunt get so emotional speaking about this topic before.  

As a child I always wanted to be with my aunt because of the safety and stability she provided. She provided a of that for me which means a lot to me because I know that during her childhood, she was not always provided that. She stated that she grew up poor, and even though her dad tried his best to provide for her, they never really knew how big their next meal would be or even if it would be enough for all of them. She faced a lot of hardships in her youth, but she doesn’t allow that to impact the person she is today, if you were to sit down and have a conversation with her you would never assume she faced any of the challenges she did. She upholds herself as a loving god-fearing woman and maintains a very clean image of herself. Although I already looked up to her and had a lot of respect for her this shined a light I had never seen on her before.  

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• SOCIAL MEDIA

by Tina NasrAbadi from Tehran in Iran (Islamic Republic of)

In these days, we all know that nurses and doctors try so hard and help us as well. So I guess you will agree with me that our heroes are doctors and nurses.

Now I want to say that my hero is my aunt who is a nurse. She works in Firoozgard Hospital in the coronavirus department. She works hard to save the lives of these people. In my opinion, she is so brave and I love her very much.

Page created on 5/28/2020 6:18:55 PM

Last edited 4/27/2021 10:04:24 PM

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Critic’s Notebook

When Tom Ripley Stares Into the Mirror, He Sees Us

In the new series and in five previous movies, the character serves as a blank slate to examine the mores and concerns of the time.

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By Alissa Wilkinson

Tom Ripley’s background is always sketchy. Patricia Highsmith provides only a few rudimentary details in the first few chapters of “The Talented Mr. Ripley,” her 1955 novel that kicked off a series of five books about the elusive con artist. Tom lives in New York, in near-destitute circumstances. He has some friends — acquaintances, really — whom he hates, mentally labeling them “the riffraff, the vulgarians, the slobs.” He wants nothing more than to be rid of them, and after the first few chapters, he succeeds. He receives money from an aunt in Boston; she raised him after his parents drowned in the harbor there. He hates her, too.

When we meet Tom, he has been committing check fraud through the mail, amassing payments in the amount of $1,863.14 that he does not plan to cash. The con job was, he thinks, “no more than a practical joke, really. Good clean sport.” He’ll destroy the checks before boarding the ship that will take him to Europe, where he’s tasked with hunting down Dickie Greenleaf, the scion of a shipbuilding mogul who’s been wasting time, and money, in Italy.

The curious thing about these features of Tom Ripley’s life is that they add up to nothing. Highsmith structures them as telling details, the kinds of specifics that writers employ like shorthand to build a person in the reader’s mind. But in fact, we get very little from them, and at every turn our attempts to wrap our heads around this character are rebuffed. You might think Tom is a man of taste and talent, except he doesn’t exhibit any real taste, and the talent seems limited to a knack for forgery and impersonation. You might think he’s a malevolent mastermind seeking to bilk a wealthy family of their fortune, but he’s really just pathetic, far more concerned with making sure the Greenleafs view him as a man of their own social class. Unfortunately, he’s charmless.

Tom is not particularly handsome, clever or well-connected. He’s just miserable, but he doesn’t have much in the way of plans, or goals, beyond getting away from where he is.

This does not make Tom Ripley a screen-ready hero. He’s not even really a strong template for an antihero. But that has not stopped filmmakers from trying. Five films and now a Netflix series, starring a parade of alluring actors, have tried out various angles on the Ripley question. Who is this guy, really? A criminal? A climber? A sociopath? A thief?

Who knows? He’s a mystery, which is what makes him so primed for reinvention. A close look at the various Mr. Ripleys suggests something both confounding and fascinating: Ripley is less character than cipher, an outline of a figure onto which filmmakers (and audiences) have projected their cultural moments. Watching them all is like watching eras swing past you in living color. (And, eventually, in black and white.)

René Clément’s 1960 adaptation, “Purple Noon” (streaming on the Criterion Channel and on Kanopy ; for rent on most major platforms ) stars a very young Alain Delon. It’s a curious film, in that even the Americans speak and act French. (Dickie’s name is changed to Philippe.) Tom, as played by Delon, is gorgeously off-putting. He’s far more alluring than Highsmith’s version, but in an unsettling and grasping sense, as if something is not quite right upstairs. You can see the seeds of Barry Keoghan’s grifter Oliver from “Saltburn,” a vulnerable exterior concealing something more conniving beneath.

The Tom Ripley of “Purple Noon” is an existential hero, in tune with the tenor of his time, and with the novel, too — after all, the movie was released only a few years after the book’s publication. In his own strange sense, he’s self-made, the product of amoral choices that define his character, a man without wit or scruples. Held up against the book and its sequels, this seems like a perfect way to translate Tom, even if the details are transposed Frenchily. He is a character without a single essence — he’s not a born killer, not a smooth operator, not really anything in particular — who is slowly defined over the course of many books: an existential hero, in the classic Sartrean sense. It’s also why he’s so alarming and addictive. You cannot quite predict what Tom Ripley will do.

It took 17 years to see another cinematic Ripley, this time in “ The American Friend ” (streaming on Criterion and for rent on most major platforms ). Directed by Wim Wenders, this loose adaptation of “Ripley’s Game,” the third book in Highsmith’s series, stars counterculture icon Dennis Hopper as Tom, and it’s set in Hamburg, Germany — another city Highsmith’s Ripley never lives.

Tom, now involved in an art forgery scheme, feels slighted by an upright German framer (that is, he frames art) played by Bruno Ganz. It turns into a thriller, heightened noir, a terrifically fascinating take on the character that flamboyantly emphasizes his American-ness. What’s most arresting about this Tom is the outfits Wenders puts him in. He’s shown early in New York, purchasing a massive Stetson, which he dons proudly. “Do you wear that hat in Hamburg?” a friend asks.

“What’s wrong with a cowboy in Hamburg?” he replies.

Indeed. The film’s title emphasizes that Tom is American, but so does his get-up: jeans, a denim jacket, his Marlboros, his T-shirts, his loud taste in home furnishings, and of course his hat, all of which mark him out as an American on the streets of what was West Germany. Highsmith saw the film and at first didn’t like it; later, Wenders has said, she told him that she had changed her mind, and that it “captured the essence of that Ripley character better than any other films.”

What is that essence? It’s America. Tom belongs to a postwar world where American power and wealth are fresh and abundant, but American taste varied wildly based on social class. He is the most American of archetypes, the hustler, hawking art that’s fake. He is vengeful and loyal at the same time, a man with both power and an endearing simplicity. Couple that with the fact that the film was released one year after the American bicentennial — in a time of national ennui — and Ripley’s ostentatious Americanness, which contrasts starkly with the aestheticized Europhilia of Highsmith’s character, takes on even more significance.

Both Delon and Hopper deliver midcentury takes on Ripley; by the turn of the millennium, the film business wasn’t looking for their kinds of characters. In 1999, “ The Talented Mr. Ripley ,” Anthony Minghella’s take on the first novel (streaming on Paramount+ ; for rent on most major platforms ), ushered in a different type of Ripley. This version is sometimes held up as faithful to the novel, but that’s a misapprehension. Several prominent characters are completely invented. The body count is higher, too. Most important, though, Tom has undergone a transformation. He is now a relatively talented, or at least employable, pianist who is able to quickly develop an appreciation for jazz and to rub shoulders with wealthy Manhattanites. He’s pathetically needy but also goofily handsome, all teeth but, let’s face it, with the look of a movie star. (Damon was swapping in for Leonardo DiCaprio, the filmmakers’ first choice.)

In this version, Tom is also clearly gay, if closeted perhaps even to himself. There are hints in the novel that Tom may be gay, or more accurately worried about appearing gay, in a vague way that suggests he prefers not to look too hard at his own desires. (Highsmith said she didn’t think he was gay ; he deploys sex only when it’s absolutely necessary to secure his station.) But the film is propelled by his desire for Dickie — to be his, to be him. Watching it, you’re reminded of what movies aimed at general audiences were like in 1999, one of the greatest years in Hollywood history. Everyone was beautiful. Everyone was very thin. And everyone seemed to be driven, primarily, by sex.

That’s even more obvious in the subsequent movies, made to capitalize on Ripley fever (and its five Oscar nominations), “Ripley’s Game” (2004) and “Ripley Under Ground” (2005). The former, directed by Liliana Cavani (and for rent on most major platforms ), stars John Malkovich and treads much of the same ground as “The American Friend,” but with a very different kind of Tom. Malkovich always brings an air of the discomfiting to his roles, but his Tom is quite different from ravishing Delon or creepy Damon, and not just because he’s older. This guy is now just a seductive con artist, a genius with a knack for pulling off sophisticated deceptions and bedding beautiful women. He might freak a few people out, but only because he’s so ruthless.

This is not Highsmith’s Ripley. It’s Hollywood’s Ripley. Whereas the adaptation of “The Talented Mr. Ripley” gives Tom a healthy dose of shame and social climbing desperation, “Ripley’s Game” is about a suave monster, a cross between the hypercompetent antiheroes who would soon take over prestige television and a conscience-free serial killer.

“Ripley Under Ground” similarly features a hypercompetent Tom stripped of his weirdness. Directed by Roger Spottiswoode, it’s probably the most ludicrous of the five movies. (It’s also the hardest one to find; it’s not even rentable on digital platforms or, as far as I can tell, available on a DVD that will play in the United States.) The movie stars Barry Pepper, with flowing blond locks. He’s not good in it, but he is supposed to be not just a con man and a killer, but also a player, immensely desirable, irresistible. This is not a Tom Ripley I recognize.

The latter Ripleys reflect a Hollywood machine with a very narrow imagination. Could you even have a protagonist who wasn’t both sexually obsessed and insanely attractive? Would anyone watch a movie where the protagonist wasn’t trying to seduce beautiful people?

Thinking about the other Ripleys when watching the new Netflix series “ Ripley, ” stylishly adapted and directed by Steven Zaillian and shot by the great Robert Elswit, can provoke whiplash. It’s in black and white, the opposite of previous adaptations’ lush sensuality. Andrew Scott, who plays this Ripley, hews as closely to Highsmith’s character as I can imagine, aside from being much older (and thus, more desperate and pathetic). His face is often blank, leaving you wondering if he is great at hiding or, alternately, just has nothing to hide. Scott molds his handsomeness into ordinariness; you would never stop to look at him on the street. He seems almost simple, which is why his arc is so chilling. Perhaps a TV show was the right way to give us a window into Ripley’s strangeness all along.

But it’s not all that interesting to rank the Ripleys. Pop culture is most fascinating as a mirror reflecting us and the people who make it, and Ripley has provided unnervingly canny reflections. Highsmith’s Ripley gives a perfect blank slate onto which generations of filmmakers have projected their ideas about the world, and about what it is we want to watch. In the end, perhaps, the frightening, alluring, dangerous thing about Tom Ripley is that he is simply us.

Alissa Wilkinson is a Times movie critic. She’s been writing about movies since 2005. More about Alissa Wilkinson

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