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College Students’ Thesis Topics Are Hilarious, Depressing

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Even the most ardent academic must concede that there’s something darkly funny about devoting years of one’s life to a thesis question so abstruse that no one else had ever cared enough to ask it—and then answering it at such great length that few will ever care to read it.

Enter lolmythesis.com , a Tumblr started by a Harvard senior procrastinating on her own undergraduate thesis. The blog encourages fellow undergrad and graduate students to distill all their hard-won knowledge into a single sentence—a sort of self-mocking tl;dr of their years-long labor of love/hate. The concept is reminiscent of #overlyhonestmethods , the brilliant hashtag game that swept science-Twitter earlier this year. If lolmythesis is a little less piercingly witty than its forebear, it’s also more accessible to non-academics. And it’s been flooded with submissions: Three weeks after it launched, the blog stands at 54 pages’ worth of academic one-liners.

They range from the silly to the depressing to the stultifying to the actually kind of interesting. A few were intriguing enough that I found myself wanting to click on them like headlines and read the full story. How often can you say that about real thesis titles? But mostly they’re just funny, and a little sad. Here are a few of my favorites:

Rocks that are next to each other in Massachusetts now were also next to each other 400 million years ago. -          Geology, Amherst College

Jellyfish don’t like it when you acidify their tank. -          Marine Biology, St Andrews

Look at this zombie. Isn’t it racist and sexist? Yes, it is. -          English Literature, DePaul University

FML: All my feelings are constructed. -          Religion & Women and Gender Studies, Harvard

People get really bored listening to beeping for an hour, but they’ll do it when professors require experiment credit. -          Psychology, University of Chicago

Once there were some lost lobsters who were maybe a tiny bit different from some other lobsters, so I killed lots of their larvae to find out if they were actually a tiny bit different. Turns out I don’t know, so I have to do it again. -          Earth Systems, Stanford University

Just because there’s a bike lane on your street doesn’t mean your rent will be higher. Or lower. Bikes are statistically insignificant to your rent. -          Economics, Reed College

Online ads that claim you are the 100000th visitor are surprisingly effective. -          Computer Science, Harvard

I wanted to see if I could make a really really small circuit. I concluded that, yes, I can make a really really small circuit. -          Physics, Northwestern University

Mark Rothko was a huge asshole. -          Theatre, Dickinson College.

There was this Hittite king who might or might not have had a son, but definitely moved his seat of government from one place to another, and then his brother moved it back, and all 8 people who care are like “Why’d he do that? Tevs.” -          Cuneiform Studies, University of Chicago

I am going to write my thesis about how dicking around on the internet is important for art and intimacy and stuff, just as soon as I get off this tumblr. -          English and Gender Studies, University of Chicago

The full blog is here .

Update, Thursday, Jan. 2, 2013: The blog’s creator is Angie Frankel, and her own website is here . Via email, Frankel told me the Tumblr has grown bigger than she had imagined, and it’s now starting to draw more submissions from Ph.D. students in addition to undergrads. It has also led to a little more procrastination on her own thesis than she initially bargained for.

“I’m currently prepping for the MCAT and working on my thesis, and now moderating an unexpectedly popular blog,” she said. “It certainly succeeded as a distraction, but I’m enjoying it every day, and the blog reminds me to laugh and keep everything in perspective.”

Previously in Slate:

An Idiot’s Guide to the Reddit Thread, “What’s the Most Intellectual Joke You Know?”

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The Ridiculous Thesis Generator… a fun exercise for essay planning and writing introductions

One of my favourite jobs here at Flourishing Philosophy is providing a little extra help to students who want to improve their academic writing.

In philosophy, and I’m sure in many other subjects too, it is best to learn through doing the actual thing. If you want to write better essays, you need to write plenty of essays! More than this, at undergraduate level and beyond, the form of a philosophy essay should be at least partly determined by its content: different questions and arguments lend themselves to different ‘shapes’ of essay.

But sometimes it is helpful to focus on a particular aspect of the process, and at times the content can make this daunting. It can be hard to think about how to structure and introduce your arguments when you feel all churned up and anxious about whether the arguments actually work .

So this is where I use my super-hi-tech and highly sophisticated Ridiculous Thesis Generator. Here it is in all its complex glory:

That’s right, you are looking at three piles of notecards, each of which is a different colour.

On each set of notecards, I have written a different part of a thesis or statement to be argued for.

• The middle (pink) set are the sort of thing that you might recognise from exam questions (“…can explain…”, “…provides evidence for…”, “…can solve the problem of…”, etc.) You get the sort of thing.
• The last (blue) set are also vaguely recognisable from essay questions (“solipsism”, “moral obligation”, “freedom”). I also included a slight wildcard: “zombies”. This is actually a philosophical concept , but I was pushing it a little with that one.
• The first (green) set are mostly random nonsense that I cooked up with the help of my very obliging friends on Facebook (“politicians”, “mosquitos”, “biscuits”, etc.)

A student can then choose a card from each pile at random to generate the Ridiculous Thesis that they will defend.

So you can end up with combinations like this:

I have at least a few friends who take this one to be trivially true:

Well, the student is given a set amount of time to come up with some arguments, no matter how ridiculous, for the equally Ridiculous Thesis. This does not have to be very long (I gave 2-3 minutes). This part would work very well as a small group exercise.

It is important to stress that while arguments are needed, they don’t necessarily need to be very good . I don’t even know what good arguments would be for some of these.

In a recent version of this exercise, an amazing student I’m currently helping chose this combination. Since we were holding the session online, they picked by choosing a number instead of drawing one of the cards.

My student did not focus on philosophical zombies, instead choosing to consider the terrifying undead creatures from horror films. After a couple of minutes, they came up with these fabulous arguments:

• Cruise’s strange appearance resembles that of half-dead beings.
• Cruise frequently associates with lumbering crowds of creatures which move as one great mass and seem oblivious to the reasons and concerns that motivate most humans.
• Cruise’s diet would not sustain a living human being.

Now, before I am faced with a whacking great lawsuit from the Church of Scientology, I should stress that these do not need to be persuasive arguments, and there is no requirement for anyone to believe that they are true. The point is that we have three points written down, all of which support the Ridiculous Thesis. This is a game, and the Ridiculous Thesis is not being genuinely asserted (it is ridiculous, after all!)

So then we examine these points and look at how they might fit together, and how they result in the Ridiculous Thesis as a conclusion. In this case, my student decided that the first two points were supportive of the positive thesis that Cruise is a zombie. The third point was more of a negative argument suggesting that he is not a living human being. Often, the negative case (what something isn’t) works well at the start, so we put it there, with the other two following on from that.

But remember that the thesis being argued for is not that Cruise is a zombie, but that he provides evidence for their existence. So, even though it might look like it is stating the obvious, we need to connect those points. So we can say something like:

• If Cruise is a zombie, then zombies exist
• If there are reasons to suppose that Cruise is a zombie, then Cruise serves as (defeasible) evidence that zombies exist.
• There are reasons to suppose that Cruise is a Zombie (namely, those offered above, that he does not seem to be human, and that being a zombie is a better explanation)
• Therefore Tom Cruise provides evidence for the existence of zombies

So there we have it! A ridiculous argument for a Ridiculous Thesis, but importantly it has a structure that is starting to look like the stucture of an excellent philosophy essay.

All that was left was to write a mock introduction, which included this overview with a little additional explanation and clarification (see my guide here ). This took around five minutes.

After that, we practiced exactly the same exercise with a real question from a past exam paper, and suddenly, the whole thing seemed less scary.

But maybe that was just because it wasn’t as scary as zombies!

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Top 10 Funny Dissertation Topics!

It’s always hard to think of a title for your dissertation. The topic you choose will form the most important part of the whole project, so the pressure is on to come up with something good. However, if you’re stuck for ideas, here are Top 10 Funny Dissertation Topics: you can decide whether they were approved or not!

Netflix and chill: a study of modern day courtship

The end of the world: why we’re all going to die in a fiery inferno, a dissertation written entirely using emojis, can you take selfies in space, why does the human race find it so hard to make decisions (i haven’t decided why yet)., the freezer was too cold and ruined my laboratory samples, adding random chemicals to other random chemicals to see if anything happens., earplugs make sound less loud., the world might exist; the world might not exist., thou shalt check thyself before thou wrecks thyself: modernised shakespeare, you may also like.

Thesis Helpers

Find the best tips and advice to improve your writing. Or, have a top expert write your paper.

Thesis Summary: A Detailed Academic Writing Guide

A thesis summary is a highly condensed version of the longer paper. It highlights the main points that have been covered in the paper while concisely describing the content of the thesis. In most cases, the summary of a thesis and the abstract serve the same purpose. They provide an overview of all the major points of a thesis. Thus, a reader can quickly see the main content of your thesis when they read the summary. This enables them to determine whether they are interested in your work or not.

What is Included in a Thesis Summary?

When asked to summarize something, you’re simply required to condense the text to the main points. As such, a good summary of thesis research should include important elements only. It should capture the main idea in the paper and the supporting points that may be interwoven with content that is of lesser importance.

Many learners confuse a thesis statement summary with an analysis. An analysis is a discussion of the techniques, ideas, and meaning in the text. On the other hand, a summary does not entail responding or critiquing the ideas in the text. Analyzing a paper entails summarizing its content to establish the ideas that you will be analyzing. A summary does not substitute for analysis.

Here are some of the things that a Ph.D. or master thesis summary should include: A title that is similar to that of your thesis The main purpose of your thesis The main topic of your thesis The research methods used to gather the information The sub-sections of your thesis Recommendations, results, and conclusions

Essentially, a summary should present the points of the author in a straightforward structure. Therefore, read the thesis carefully to determine the major and minor components or points of the argument and summarize them in an organized manner.

A point that the author makes at the beginning and another one at the end should concisely be included in a summary of thesis to convey the main argument of the author. Thus, you should read, understand, and reconstruct the thesis into a more concise, shorter form.

How to Write an Executive Summary for Thesis

Perhaps, you have written a short thesis that is not longer than ten pages. In that case, follow these steps to write a summary thesis:

• Summarize every paragraph in one sentence
• Summarize the entire text in a single sentence
• Write a single paragraph that starts with a sentence that summarizes the entire text followed by a paragraph of summary sentences
• Rewrite and rearrange your paragraph to ensure that it’s concise and clear.
• Eliminate relatively minor and repetitive points and include transitions.

Make sure that the final summary is complete, coherent, and unified.

How to Write Summary of Ph.D. Thesis and Longer Texts

A longer text like a Ph.D. requires time to summarize. That’s because you have to read and understand the document before you summarize it. Here’s how to write a summary thesis for longer papers.

• Outline the thesis by breaking it down into different major sections. To do this, group the paragraphs that focus on a similar topic and then list down the supporting points for different sections.
• Write a sentence or two that summarizes every section.
• Create a single sentence that summarizes the entire text. Look for the topic sentence in the thesis to guide you.
• Write one paragraph or several to start the overall summary sentence. Follow it with sentences that summarize different sections.
• Rearrange and rewrite the paragraphs to make the text concise and clear while eliminating repetitious and relatively minor points. Also, include transitions in your summary.

The final summary should include the main supporting points of every idea. Make the final version coherent, unified, and complete.

When is the Summary of Findings in Thesis Necessary?

The summary and conclusion thesis serves the purpose of providing an overview of the paper. As such, students are required to write a summary in many instances. In some cases, an educator can assign learners to write a page or two after reading a paper or article. They can also be asked to come up with a summary of their text as part of their critique or response after reading a paper.

Students can also write article summaries as a part of their planning or note-taking process when writing a research paper. These summaries or their parts can be included in the final papers. When writing a research paper, an author can depend on the summary as their reference to source materials. A summary enables a writer to condense broad information so that they can explain and present the relevance of the sources that deal with a similar subject.

A paper can also be summarized in the introduction to present a precise and concise overview of the main ideas to be discussed in the rest of the text. The length of a summary should depend on the complexity and length of the paper. Additionally, the purpose of a summary should determine whether it will be a few sentences, a shorter paragraph, or even several paragraphs. You can even come across a thesis summary sample that looks like an entire paper.

Qualities of a Good Summary Thesis Sample

When learning how to write summary and conclusion in thesis, many students use samples as their guides. But, how do you know that you’re using a good thesis summary example? Here are the qualities to look for:

• Comprehensiveness : A good summary should be comprehensive. All important points should be isolated from the original passage and noted down in a brief list. These are the ideas that should form the summary because they are indispensable to the development of the thesis.
• Conciseness : An ideal summary should be free of repetitions. Do not repeat the same points even if they have been restated in the main document. The summary should be shorter while providing a brief overview of the paper. Therefore, avoid repetition of the main point and supporting ideas.
• Coherence : A good summary makes sense. It’s not a piece that looks like it’s been taken from the main document. It should also not sound like a collection of disjointed sentences from the main document that is being summarized.
• Independence : When writing a summary, your work is not to imitate the main text’s author. Instead, you are expected to showcase your style and voice in the summary. Thus, you should not just quote the main text’s author. Instead, express how you understand the document in your words. A summary should be based on your understanding and interpretation of the main ideas or points of the writer. Nevertheless, a good summary does not create distortion or misrepresentation through the introduction of criticisms or comments.

It’s also crucial to note that a good summary thesis example uses a structure that features an introduction, the body, and a conclusion. It presents the goal or purpose, results, and conclusion or recommendations. What’s more, it features logical connections of the included information without adding new information.

To write a great summary, work on this part after completing your thesis. Make sure that you’re guided by the main points of your thesis. What’s more, use a good executive summary for thesis sample to guide you. The length of your summary should depend on its purpose and the length of the main document. Once you have written the summary, read it carefully, and eliminate all errors when proofreading and editing it. Alternatively, ask our thesis editors to proofread the summary for you.

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Thesis Summary

Considering that you have finished writing your thesis, it is high time that you started working on your thesis summary or abstract as the last and final part of your research paper before submitting it to your instructor. Writing an abstract is actually the simplest way for your audience, the teachers and the panel of publishers (if you wish for it to be published) to know what your research paper is about without going through the bulk of your paper.

What is an Abstract?

According to an article found in the Simon Fraser University database, the abstract is deemed a critical part of your thesis and it is presented at the beginning of the thesis, as it is a summary of the whole thesis. The thesis summary is a substantive description of your work read by an external examiner by presenting all the major elements of your work in a highly condensed form.

Size and Structure

Normally, a thesis summary would only contain 120 or less (for undergraduate theses), 150 words (for Masters theses) and 350 words (for a doctoral dissertation).

• For doctoral dissertations, it is best to limit it to only 280 words with a format of one double-spaced page, to preserve visual coherence.
• The structure of the abstract should mirror the structure of the whole thesis, and should represent all its major elements.
• For instance, if your thesis has five chapters (rationale, literature review, methodology, results, conclusion), limit each chapter to only a sentence or two for each chapter in order to maximize some parts that need more substantial backing.

Clearly Specify Your Research Questions

• Research questions are important in making sure that the abstract is coherent and logically structured as they form the backbone to which other elements adhere; they should be presented near the beginning of the abstract.
• Depending on the length of your research paper, there is only room for one to three questions. If there are more than three major research questions in your thesis, try to rearrange them by reducing some to subsidiary status.

Don’t Forget the Results

• One of the most common mistakes in writing abstracts is the failure to indicate the results.
• The primary function of your thesis (and by extension your abstract) is not to tell readers what you did, it is to tell them what you discovered. Other information, such as the account of your research methods, is needed mainly to back the claims you make about your results.
• The final part of your thesis should be about summarizing your results as well as interpreting them.
• Although it is sometimes not necessary, you can choose to add keywords below your abstract as the most important terms that can be found in the thesis.

Listed below are some thesis summary examples:

This study aimed to analyze and identify the most frequent news category and rhetoric of the three local English dailies as well as assess whether they align to the readers’ news preference. These factors served as the sources of the data gathered by the researchers: ninety tertiary students, each local publication’s respective editorial board, and banner stories. Findings indicated that even though the editors would usually select their stories based on impact, the banner story content however focused more on news like crime and politics which are mostly conflict-based issues, instead of human interest stories that readers prefer the most. In conclusion, the respective editorial boards of each publication are not presenting the readers with their main interests in the banner story. Keywords: banner stories, news values, news categories, gatekeeping/gatekeepers, and readers’ preference

An example of a summary format The aim or goal or purpose of this graduation thesis (title) is to … (analyse, characterize, compare, examine, illustrate, present, survey, design, reconstruct) … The graduation thesis is composed of five chapters, each of them dealing with different aspect of … Chapter 1 is introductory and (defines, describes, reviews, deals with) … The chapter is subdivided into two parts. Part 1 describes … and explains … . Part 2 deals with … Chapter 2 examines … . The chapter consists of three parts. Part 1 focuses on … . Part 2 investigates … . Part 3 addresses the issue of … . Chapter 3 is subdivided into two parts and provides an outline of relevant … Part 1 illustrates … . Part 2 looks at … . Chapter 4 concentrates on problems resulting from … Part 1 describes …. Part 2 recommends changes to be made in legislation … Conclusions are drawn in Chapter 5. The main aim of the graduation thesis has been reached. The author suggests that …………………… should be changed/introduced/applied.

The aim of this graduation thesis entitled Development of Yamakawa Technologies to Ascertain the Existence of Cheese on the Moon is to test the use of Yamakawa technologies in ascertaining the existence of cheese on the moon. Yamakawa technologies have been successfully used to test the existence of water in Wakanda, but to date no further applications are known. For this reason the author decided to test further applications, with the aim of describing the technology’s suitability for further development. This thesis first examines the testing procedures for the water in Wakanda experiment, and presents the results. In a second stage several adaptations to Yamakawa for the testing of the existence of cheese on the moon are undertaken. Finally the technology is applied to the question of cheese on the moon, within a six-week testing phase. At the end of each week the testing apparatus is fine tuned, and experiment results are charted every twenty-four hours. The results of the experiment show that Yamakawa technologies are well suited to ascertaining the presence of water in Wakanda, but were unable to be sufficiently modified for the purpose of ascertaining the existence of cheese on the moon. The author recommends further modification to the technology before any other uses are considered.

After writing the said abstract in your research paper, then congratulations! You are now ready to move to the next step of your thesis journey, defending it. Just remember this, always know your thesis by heart. Believe me, if you do, you will not have a hard time and eventually, you will learn to enjoy it too. Good luck!

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Guide On How To Write a Thesis Summary In 2023

So, you just found out that you need to write a thesis summary. In most cases, students who encounter this requirement for the first time start to panic. Frankly, not everyone knows what this thesis summary is. And let’s not forget that most students have no clue how to write one. Don’t worry about it too much though.

What is a thesis summary?

Why use a thesis summary, how to write an effective thesis summary in 2023, master thesis summary example.

A thesis summary is a document that summarizes the points of a longer essay, thesis, or dissertation. Readers will often find a summary to be helpful as it offers a succinct overview of the document’s contents. A Thesis Summary should not be confused with an abstract as they both refer to separate documents that serve different purposes.

The steps involved in writing a Thesis Summary depend on what type of thesis you are summarizing. If you’re summarizing a text-based thesis, then your first step should be to read the Thesis and make note of any major key points and conclusions made by the author(s). You then assemble your notes into one coherent paragraph detailing each one of the major key points. Keep in mind that this initial paragraph will serve as an introduction to your Thesis Summary; therefore, it should not contain the thesis’ main points. Once you’ve completed this step, use these Main Points (identified in your thesis) as a guide for writing the body of your document.

If you’re developing a summary thesis that’s math-related, then you’ll first need to take note of the main conclusions. Second, you must determine how these conclusions were reached by noting each step in the proof. Finally, you’ll have to explain why each step is true using logic statements and definitions from the thesis.

These are the two standard ways to write a thesis summary. However, you can also include your insights, opinions, and comments if you choose.

The steps for writing a ‘ Thesis Summary in 2023’ are just about the same as they’ve always been. They’re pretty much set in stone because this is how students have written thesis summaries for decades.

For both types of thesis summaries, you should include a final paragraph that ties everything together with a brief conclusion. This final paragraph should highlight the key points and conclusions made throughout your document as well as offer a brief statement about why these points matter.

Step 1: Read the Text

The very first thing you’ll want to do is read the entire text. When you’re reading, make note of any major key points and conclusions made by the author(s). If you’re summarizing a text-based thesis, then these major points will form the basis for your introduction paragraph. However, don’t include these points in this introduction.

Step 2: Get to Work

After reading the entire document, it’s time to get started! Begin by taking notes on what you’ve learned from the text and organize them into one coherent paragraph. Make sure that this introduction doesn’t contain the thesis’ main points. Next, use these Main Points (identified in your thesis) as a guide for writing the rest of your thesis summary.

Step 3: Proof it Out

If you’re summarizing a math-related thesis, then you’ll first need to take note of the main conclusions and purposes stated within the document. Next, determine how these conclusions were reached by noting each statement or step in the proof. Finally, complete your Thesis Summary by explaining why each step is true using logical statements and definitions from the thesis.

Step 4: Wrap it Up

Once you’ve finished writing the body of your Thesis Summary, include a final paragraph that ties everything together with a brief conclusion. This final paragraph should highlight the key points and conclusions made throughout your document as well as offer a brief statement about why these points matter.

The best reasons to use a thesis summary are that it will both summarize the relevance of the document and add relevance to an argument. If someone is looking for a specific point or conclusion from the original text, then a Thesis Summary provides them with a quick breakdown of what they can find in the document’s introduction.

You should include a thesis summary in your writings when you believe that there may be too many arguments within your writing. It will help you put together the important points from the different arguments into one concise section.

If you’re summarizing a math-related thesis, they will ensure that you proof every step of the proof given in your paper. It will make sure that you do not miss any details.

There are a few key things that you should keep in mind when writing an effective thesis summary.

• When you’re summarizing a math-related paper, make sure to highlight the main conclusions and how they were arrived at.
• Tell the reader why these conclusions matter by explaining each one with logical statements and definitions from the original document.
• Include a brief conclusion paragraph that ties everything together and highlights the key points covered throughout your work.
• If your thesis is text-based, make sure to include important points throughout the body of your work.
• Last but not least, remember that you are writing a summary so don’t use big words or complex sentence structures! Your goal is to be understood by anyone who reads it in the future.

This Thesis Summary sample is based on a text-based document. Please note, as far as the format and structure are concerned, there’s not much difference between a summary of a bachelor thesis example, an example of a Ph.D. thesis summary, and a thesis chapter summary from a Master thesis summary.

The introduction to the original document should be written as such:

“In this thesis, we’d like to introduce a new framework for understanding how we learn and teach math. The topic of learning and teaching should be the focus of mathematics education.”

Then, point out the main points and conclusions made throughout the body of your work:

“One conclusion that we’ve drawn from our research is that children’s conceptions should be taken into account when designing an appropriate math curriculum for them.”

“A second conclusion that we’ve drawn from our research is that children are more likely to develop their ideas about math if they are encouraged to think critically.”

Finally, make a brief statement about why these points matter using logical statements and definitions from the thesis:

“These conclusions highlight how important it is to focus on children’s conceptions when designing curricula because if we don’t take them into account, we miss out on our student’s potential.”

“These conclusions also show that we need to emphasize critical thinking as a means for children to develop their ideas about math.”

Now, you’ve successfully written an effective thesis summary! Keep in mind that your goal is to highlight the main points and conclusions of the original document as well as boast about their significance. To make this process easier for you, we hope that our tips come in handy.

You should now have a good idea about what a thesis summary or dissertation summary is, why you should use them, and how to write one.

A thesis summary is an overview of the main points and conclusions made in a text-based document or simply put, a summary of the research paper. A Thesis Summary should be included when you believe there are too many arguments within your writing, or if you’re summarizing math-related papers for proofing purposes. Key things to keep in mind while writing one include highlighting important concepts that were previously mentioned, explaining why these new ideas matter with logical statements and definitions from the original work, and providing a brief conclusion paragraph that ties everything together. If you want thesis help with any part of this process from reading or understanding complex texts to organizing them into coherent paragraphs let us know! Our team of thesis writers will be happy to help you complete your thesis summary!

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Firoozeh dumas, ask litcharts ai: the answer to your questions.

When she’s seven years old, Firoozeh , along with her father, Kazem , her mother, Nazireh , and her older brother, Farshid , move from Abadan, Iran to Whittier, California. Kazem is an intelligent engineer working for a large Iranian petroleum company, and he needs to be in the United States for his work. Over the next two years, Firoozeh slowly adjusts to her American surroundings.

One of the first things Firoozeh decides about American society is that it’s kind and generous. On her first day of school, Firoozeh can barely understand what’s going on, since she speaks virtually no English. She and her mother get lost when they try to walk home, but a friendly American family lets them use the phone to call Kazem. Afterwards, Firoozeh quickly learns to speak English well, and very soon she can speak without any trace of an accent.

Although Kazem has lived in the United States years ago, when he studied in California and Texas as a Fulbright scholar, he’s largely ignorant of American culture, and his English isn’t great. He immerses himself in American culture, studying documents of any kind and watching hours of junky television. Nazireh is less interested in making friends with other Americans or improving her English, and even today, she doesn’t speak good English. Firoozeh perfects her own English learning how to translate for her mother. Kazem takes his family to various “all-American” places, such as Disneyland and Las Vegas, and he’s extremely enthusiastic about American pop culture—to the point where Firoozeh gradually comes to find Disneyland boring.

Firoozeh does well in school, but her classmates sometimes regard her as odd because she’s from a faraway country. Students asks her if there are camels in her country, and even parents assume that she speaks the same language as everyone else who lives in the Middle East. After two years, Kazem moves his family back to Iran, but shortly afterwards, his company sends him back to California, this time to Newport. During the early years of their second period in the U.S., Kazem takes him family on trips to Vegas, Hawaii, and Yosemite National Park, and Firoozeh goes to a summer camp, during which she refuses to bathe and spends all her time making key chains.

Many of Kazem’s relatives, with whom he’s extremely close, come to visit him and stay with him in California. Kazem loves his siblings, as well as his nephews and nieces, and whenever any one of them gets good news, the good news makes them all equally happy. As Firoozeh grows older, she learns more about her father. Unlike many other people in Iran, he doesn’t obey the Muslim ban on eating ham, and in general he’s not very religious at all. As a young man, Kazem did well on the prestigious Fulbright exam and earned a scholarship to Texas A&M. During his time in the U.S., Kazem met Albert Einstein and decided that he would raise his own family in the U.S., where his children would have lots of opportunities for success.

Firoozeh grows up with great respect for her family and Iranian culture. She’s very close with her uncles, aunts, and cousins, who provide her with lots of love and encouragement. However, she doesn’t admire everything about Iranian culture. Her mother, Nazireh , only has a sixth-grade education, and she had children with Kazem when she was only seventeen years old. Firoozeh admires other women in her family, such as her Aunt Parvine , partly because she became a successful doctor in Switzerland instead of doing what Iranian society expected her to do.

In the late 1970s, the Iranian Revolution breaks out, and Iran goes from being an important Middle Eastern country in America’s eyes to a symbol of danger. Revolutionaries take American hostages in Tehran and threaten to kill them. In the meantime, Iran reforms its oil economy, meaning that Kazem no longer has a job in the U.S. He tries to find other opportunities, but no American or Saudi companies want to hire an Iranian. Shortly after the hostage crisis ends, he gets a new job that pays much less money.

Firoozeh works hard as a teenager to pay her way through college. She excels at writing essays for scholarship money, and also wins a two-month stay in Paris to study French. Her visit to Paris is a little disappointing, however, since she doesn’t make any French friends, and finds the classes dull.

Firoozeh attends the University of California at Berkeley, and graduates with honors. There she also meets a French Catholic student named François Dumas , who later becomes her husband. In Iranian culture, marrying a non-Iranian is often frowned upon, but Kazem and Nazireh welcome François into their family. Unbeknownst to them, François’s parents are appalled that he’s marrying an Iranian woman, and many of his family members don’t attend the wedding. François and Firoozeh are married, first by a Catholic priest and then in the traditional Persian fashion. They move into a San Francisco apartment, and later have children. While she’s married to François, Firoozeh thinks more deeply about beauty standards and about the sexism of Iranian culture. She admires women who show confidence in their bodies and achieve success professionally. During a trip to the Bahamas, Firoozeh and François judge a beauty pageant and choose a conventionally unattractive but highly intelligent and articulate young woman as the winner.

Throughout her marriage to François, Firoozeh remains extremely close with the rest of her family. She admires her father for his extraordinary generosity to his friends, both in America and back in Iran. Kazem often tells her, “I’m a rich man in America … I just don’t have a lot of money.”

It's Kind of a Funny Story

75 pages • 2 hours read

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It’s Kind of a Funny Story was Ned Vizzini’s second Young Adult novel, published by Hyperion in 2006. It is a critically acclaimed Young Adult novel and coming-of-age story that was given a starred review by the American Librarians Association and adapted into a film of the same name (2010).

Content Warning: This novel and study guide include topics and themes that may be sensitive for some readers, including suicide, mental health, and references to illicit drug use and sexual abuse.

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Vizzini wrote the novel immediately after he was hospitalized for depression in 2004. The novel is written from the first-person perspective of its protagonist , Craig Gilner , who checks himself into the hospital after contemplating suicide. The novel takes place over his five day stay, showing his development and growing self-awareness as he navigates his mental illness, relationships, and the pressures of modern society. Vizzini wrote a total of four novels, all of which tackle themes related to mental health. He died by suicide in 2010 at the age of 32.

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The story is written in first person, allowing the narrator to follow Craig Gilner closely during his five day stay at the hospital and witness firsthand the events that contributed to his anxiety and depression.

The novel begins with Craig, a high school student who lives in Brooklyn, New York, and is facing immense pressure to succeed at Executive Pre-Professional, a fictitious Manhattan high school that he worked hard to get into. The novel rewinds to show Craig’s intense efforts to get into the school. Craig’s anxiety and depression develop as he struggles to succeed at school. He is further discouraged because his perfect score on the entrance exam is viewed as slightly illegitimate, since the test was “faulty” that year. In addition to pressures at school, Craig has a huge crush on his friend Aaron’s girlfriend, Nia . Craig begins struggling to sleep, focus, and keep his food down. He narrates his inner dialogue, using the terms Cycling, Tentacles, and Anchors to describe the different aspects of his internal experience. As his mind goes through these, he waits for a Shift, which is the moment when he finally feels relief.

Eventually, Craig tells his parents that he is depressed. They bring him to a doctor who prescribes him Zoloft, an antidepressant. He also starts visiting a therapist. Craig starts feeling much better, which he later calls the Fake Shift. He stops taking his Zoloft, which makes his depression return more severely. He starts having suicidal thoughts and decides that he will jump off the Brooklyn Bridge. Before setting his plan in motion, he realizes that he doesn’t want to die and reads one of his mother’s self-help books. He calls the National Suicide Hotline, who help him navigating checking himself into the hospital.

Craig is admitted to the adult psychiatric ward, called “Six North.” He meets a diverse group of residents who are eccentric but accepting. While Craig is hesitant at first and worries that he will fall behind in school while he’s in the hospital, he becomes more comfortable and invested in the community and the people there. He loans a dress shirt to one of the residents, Bobby , for an interview and arranges Egyptian music to be brought for his roommate, Muqtada. He also meets a girl his own age, Noelle , whom he shares a connection with.

In addition to finding a community of friends, Craig rekindles his childhood passion for drawing maps . He hasn’t had time for any hobbies since middle school and begins drawing maps of cities inside of the outline of a brain. These maps are personalized, showing his nuanced understanding of each of his fellow residents.

Craig deals with constant anxiety over what his classmates and friends are thinking of him. He is crushed when Nia, who he confided in, shares his location at the hospital with Aaron , who drunkenly calls from a party. After breaking up with Aaron, Nia visits Craig and the pair kiss in Craig’s room until Muqtada interrupts them and Nia leaves, upset. Aaron and Craig had previously argued over the phone and only reconnect when Aaron visits him on his last day at Six North. He apologizes for minimizing Craig’s mental health problems and explains that he and Nia are trying to work things out. Craig’s last day at Six North is also when his relationship with Noelle becomes romantic.

A combination of friendship, therapy, and what he’s learned from the other patients helps Craig understand and confront his anxiety. He begins to eat normally again and decides to pursue art. His counselor suggests that he transfer from his elite school to an art-focused one, which excites Craig, though he worries whether his parents will approve. While his father is not initially supportive, Craig stands up for his needs and explains that he needs to do this for his health. He leaves the hospital with a sense of hope and renewal, along with a more positive attitude about life and his future.

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Fallout review – an absolute blast of a TV show

This immaculately made, supremely witty post-apocalyptic drama is yet another brilliant video game adaptation. It’s funny, self-aware and tense – an astonishing balancing act

The following review contains spoilers for the first episode of Fallout .

The first thing to note is that, as with The Last of Us, there is no need for any viewer to be au fait with the source material of Fallout, Amazon’s new competitor in the field of hit video game adaptations (though a fan of the game who watched it with me assures me that there is much to enjoy in addition to the basic narrative if you are).

For newcomers such as me, this intelligent, drily witty, immaculately constructed series set in the Fallout universe fully captivates and entertains on its own terms. It opens in 1950s America, at the height of the cold war and the “red scare”, with former TV star Cooper Howard (Walton Goggins) reduced to appearing at a children’s birthday party after being tarred with the pinko brush. A mushroom cloud appears on the horizon, the blast wave hits, the apocalypse arrives.

All those who can afford it rush to the secure vaults they have had built in preparation. We cut to Vault 33 two centuries later, by which point they appear to be doing very nicely. All the naivety of the 50s and the better parts of its mores – politeness, consideration, cooperation, modesty and restraint – have been preserved, albeit with the occasional twist. Like daily weapons training, and chipper approaches to the avoidance of marrying one of your many cousins.

The underground idyll is shattered when they are brutally raided by surface dwellers led by a woman called Moldaver (Sarita Choudhury). Vault Overseer Hank MacLean (Kyle MacLachlan) is kidnapped and his daughter Lucy (Ella Purnell) defies orders from the remaining Council and leaves the Vault to find him. As a wide-eyed believer in the Golden Rule (do unto others as you would have them do unto you), she is wildly unprepared for the array of delights surface-dwelling holds. It’s not like she can disguise herself effectively either. As one gnarled resident of the desperate nearby town of Filly says – “Clean hair, good teeth, all 10 fingers. Must be nice.”

Surface threats include, but are not limited to: giant cockroaches, godawful sea monsters (the Gulper’s innards haunt my dreams), radiation poisoning, strung-out survivors, fanatics of various kinds, puppy incinerators and cannibalistic Fiends. The Brotherhood of Steel try to control the Wasteland but you can’t help but feel, committed warrior faction though they are, that they are on a losing wicket. The Brotherhood is divided into Lords (in battered Iron Man-esque suits), Squires who attend and hope to become them and Aspirants training as Squires. Aspirant Maximus (Aaron Moten) is our guy and we follow him as he rises from bullied victim to rogue Lord. His mission? Acquire the severed head that Lucy also needs to find, containing a chip that Moldaver wants (and which Lucy hopes to trade for Daddy MacLean).

The biggest threat of all, however, is the Ghouls, and one in particular – a noseless, mutated remnant of Cooper Howard who is also hunting for the head and the bounty on it. He is the first to cross paths with Lucy, and oh the fun we have! By the end of a fishing trip, she’s in such a state that if she were to return to Filly, they would probably accept her unquestioningly as one of their own.

Co-creators Geneva Robertson-Dworet and Graham Wagner somehow manage to combine traditional post-nuclear apocalypse tropes with semi-ironic takes on 50s motifs, B-movie conventions and horror-level blood and gore (and work in plenty of Easter eggs and other pleasures for gamers). It’s a perfectly paced story that is both funny and self-aware without winking at the camera, undercutting our increasing emotional investment in characters who reveal – and sometimes unexpectedly redeem – themselves layer by layer. If I tell you that the organ-harvesting robot is voiced by Matt Berry, that the Ghoul’s meeting with a long-lost, rotting colleague almost made me cry and that neither element jarred with the other, perhaps that will convey something of the triumphant balancing act that is maintained throughout the eight-episode series.

It is, if you’ll pardon the pun, an absolute blast. Goggins is wonderful as both the unsullied golden boy Cooper and the wretched Ghoul, Moten brings such nuance to what could easily be a one-note role and Purnell performs Lucy’s fall from innocence brilliantly. The growing mystery back at Vault 32, as Lucy’s brother Norm (Moises Arias) becomes suspicious of the origins of the murderous raid and the supposedly benign Council that has protected them all these years, adds yet another strand to the story and ratchets up the tension even further. In short, for Fallout, I’m all in.

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