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13 Mistakes to Avoid in Your Personal Statement

Without question, your grades and test scores are the most important part of your grad school application. But stellar grades and a high GRE score are not enough to make you stand out from the thousands of other applicants with similar scores.

So how can you distinguish yourself? The answer: A unique and thoughtfully crafted personal statement.

Think about all the study sessions, missed parties and hard work you’ve put into maintaining good grades and achieving a score that made your mother cry tears of joy. Don’t throw all that away by writing a weak personal statement. This is a valuable opportunity for you to show the admissions department why they would be remiss not to accept you.

On the other hand, it’s important to not get too creative. I’m sorry, but you should probably save your Quentin Tarantino-style statement for another time. Trust me on that one.

Instead, it’s time to channel your inner Goldilocks and express who you are in a way that’s not too much and not too little, but is “just right” to catch the admission department’s attention.

To help you navigate through the writing process, we’ve compiled a list of 13 mistakes you should avoid when writing your personal statement.

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Cliches can be hard to avoid. They’ve been lodged in our memory since the dawn of time. (See what I did there?) But they’re uninspiring, tired, and show a lack of creativity. Instead, come up with your own metaphors and similes to say in your unique way that you “have a thirst for knowledge,” and avoid clichés like they’re going out of style.

2. Redundancy

Don’t include your GPA in your personal statement. Let me say that again. Don’t include your GPA in your personal statement. In fact, avoid including any information – such as awards you’ve received, etc. – that can be found elsewhere in your application. It’s redundant. Think of your personal statement as valuable real estate and there’s only enough space for the best, most unique information.

3. Spelling or Grammatical Errors

Personal essay 5

This cannot be overstated. Admissions directors won’t be able to fully appreciate your powerful personal statement if they have to keep stumbling over spelling and grammar errors. Avoid errors by asking a friend or family member to help you proofread your statement. Another pair of eyes is more likely to catch if you misspelled “conscientious,” for example.

4. Profanity or Slang

This should go without saying, but some students forget to leave out certain inappropriate four-letter words. Just. Don’t. Do. It.

Quotes can be very inspirational, especially when they come from great writers and charismatic people like Martin Luther King, Jr. or E.E. Cummings. But they’re not YOUR words, and they don’t tell the admissions director who you are. Leave them out of your personal statement and post them on your Instagram instead.

6. Hyperboles

Personal essay 3

You want to show enthusiasm in your statement, but it’s not necessary to say that if you don’t get into grad school your “mother will kill you.” The admissions director will also likely not be impressed if you tell them you have studied no less than a million hours to get into their school. In fact, avoid any and all exaggerations.

7. Plagiarism

These days, it’s easy to find examples of great personal statements online. However, keep in mind that universities will be able to identify if you have copied any material from another source. It’s not worth the risk and, again, it doesn’t let the school see your uniqueness.

8. Other People

Remember, keep the focus of your statement on you and what makes you stand out. Avoid too much mention of mentors, family members, or other people who may have inspired your academic goals. Keep it all about you.

9. Negativity

mistakes in personal statement

Keep your personal statement upbeat and positive. Avoid talking about any past educational experiences. You should also avoid mentioning any personal circumstances that have caused you difficulty – unless you are able to highlight how you overcame the circumstances and what you learned from them.

Although you may be trying to secure a financial award from the school, you should leave out any mention of money in your essay. Period.

11. Arrogance

Of course you want to highlight what differentiates you from other students, but be sure to do so in a humbling way. Boasting about how awesome or great you are may be off-putting to those reviewing your application. Also, you should show , rather than tell how wonderful you are by describing certain unique experiences rather than listing superficial adjectives to describe yourself.

Often times, we immediately try to use humor to showcase what makes us unique. Being quirky, though, can be risky in an admissions essay. So proceed with caution. Keep in mind that those in the admissions department may not share your sense of humor, so it’s best to keep your weird jokes between you and your friends.

13. Confessions

This is an opportunity to describe your educational and professional goals in an intentional way. It is not an opportunity to reveal the deepest, darkest corners of your mind, so stay on point and avoid any irrelevant information.

  About the Author:

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Jennifer is here to help you navigate college and grad school while still maintaining your sanity. She is a graduate of the University of Florida (Go Gators!), with a major in Journalism and Communications and a minor in Psychology. She’s also a certified Montessori instructor and once witnessed a four-year-old correctly label all 54 countries on a map of Africa. She prefers to sing when not in the shower, and she’s not afraid of heights as long as she’s standing on something that is less than 15-feet tall.

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Jennifer Friend

Jennifer is here to help you navigate college and grad school while still maintaining your sanity. She is a graduate of the University of Florida (Go Gators!), with a major in Journalism and Communications and a minor in Psychology. She’s also a certified Montessori instructor and once witnessed a four-year-old correctly label all 54 countries on a map of Africa. She prefers to sing when not in the shower, and she’s not afraid of heights as long as she’s standing on something that is less than 15-feet tall.

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How to Write a Personal Statement (with Tips and Examples)

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Hannah Yang

How to write a personal statement

Table of Contents

What is a personal statement, 6 tips on how to write a personal statement, personal statement examples (for college and university), faqs about writing personal statements, conclusion on how to write a personal statement.

How do you tell someone who you are in just a few hundred words?

It’s certainly no easy task, but it’s one almost every college applicant must do. The personal statement is a crucial part of any college or university application.

So, how do you write a compelling personal statement?

In this article, we’ll give you all the tools, tips, and examples you need to write an effective personal statement.

A personal statement is a short essay that reveals something important about who you are. It can talk about your background, your interests, your values, your goals in life, or all of the above.

Personal statements are required by many college admission offices and scholarship selection committees. They’re a key part of your application, alongside your academic transcript, standardized test scores, and extracurricular activities.

The reason application committees ask you to write a personal statement is so they can get to know who you are. 

Some personal statements have specific prompts, such as “Discuss a period of personal growth in your life” or “Tell us about a challenge or failure you’ve faced.” Others are more open-ended with prompts that essentially boil down to “Tell us about yourself.”

No matter what the prompt is, your goal is the same: to make yourself stand out to the selection committee as a strong candidate for their program.

Here are some things a personal statement can be:

It can be funny. If you have a great sense of humor, your personal statement is a great place to let that shine.  

It can be vulnerable. Don’t be afraid to open up about hardships in your life or failures you’ve experienced. Showing vulnerability can make you sound more like a real person rather than just a collection of application materials.  

It can be creative. Candidates have got into top schools with personal statements that take the form of “a day in the life” descriptions, third-person short stories, and even cooking recipes.

Now we’ve talked about what a personal statement is, let’s quickly look at what a personal statement isn’t:

It isn’t a formal academic paper. You should write the personal statement in your natural voice, using first-person pronouns like “I” and “me,” not in the formal, objective language you would use to write an academic paper.

It isn’t a five-paragraph essay. You should use as many paragraphs as you need to tell your story instead of sticking to the essay structure you learned in school.

It isn’t a resumé. You should try to describe yourself by telling a clear and cohesive story rather than providing a jumbled list of all of your accomplishments and ambitions.

personal statement definition

Here are our top six tips for writing a strong personal statement.

Tip 1: Do Some Serious Self-Reflection

The hardest part of writing a personal statement isn’t the actual process of writing it.

Before you start typing, you have to figure out what to write about. And that means taking some time to reflect on who you are and what’s important in your life.

Here are some useful questions you can use to start your self-reflection. You can either answer these on your own by writing down your answers, or you can ask a trusted friend to listen as you talk about them together.

What were the key moments that shaped your life? (e.g. an important friendship, a travel experience, an illness or injury)

What are you proud of? (e.g. you’re a good listener, you always keep your promises, you’re a talented musician)

How do you choose to spend your time? (e.g. reading, practicing soccer, spending time with your friends)

What inspires you? (e.g. your grandmother, a celebrity, your favorite song)

Doing this self-reflection is crucial for figuring out the perfect topics and anecdotes you can use to describe who you are.

Tip 2: Try to Avoid Cliché Topics

College application committees read thousands of personal statements a year. That means there are some personal statement topics they see over and over again.

Here are a few examples of common personal statement topics that have become cliché:

Winning a tournament or sports game

Volunteering in a foreign country

Moving to a new home

Becoming an older sibling

Being an immigrant or having immigrant parents

If you want to make a strong impression in the application process, you need to make your personal statement stand out from the crowd.

But if your chosen personal statement topic falls into one of these categories, that doesn’t necessarily mean you shouldn’t use it. Just make sure to put a unique spin on it so it still delivers something the committee hasn’t seen before.

mistakes in personal statement

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Tip 3: Show, Don’t Tell

One common mistake you might make in your personal statement is to simply tell the reader what you want them to know about you, such as by stating “I have a fear of public speaking” or “I love to cook.”

Instead of simply stating these facts, you should show the committee what you’re talking about through a story or scene, which will make your essay much more immersive and memorable.

For example, let’s say you want the committee to know you overcame your fear of public speaking. Instead of writing “I overcame my fear of public speaking,” show them what it was like to be onstage in front of a microphone. Did your palms get clammy? Did you feel light-headed? Did you forget your words?

Or let’s say you want the committee to know you love to cook. Instead of writing “I love to cook,” show them why you love to cook. What’s your favorite dish to cook? What does the air smell like when you’re cooking it? What kitchen appliances do you use to make it?

Tip 4: Connect the Story to Why You’re Applying

Don’t forget that the purpose of your personal statement isn’t simply to tell the admissions committee who you are. That’s an important part of it, of course, but your ultimate goal is to convince them to choose you as a candidate.

That means it’s important to tie your personal story to your reasons for applying to this specific school or scholarship. Finish your essay with a strong thesis.

For example, if your story is about overcoming your fear of public speaking, you might connect that story to your ambition of becoming a politician. You can then tie that to your application by saying, “I want to apply to this school because of its fantastic politics program, which will give me a perfect opportunity to use my voice.”

Tip 5: Write in Your Own Voice

The personal statement isn’t supposed to be written in a formal tone. That’s why they’re called “personal” statements because you have to shape it to fit your own voice and style.

Don’t use complicated or overwrought language. You don’t need to fill your essay with semicolons and big words, unless that’s how you sound in real life.

One way to write in your own voice is by speaking your personal statement out loud. If it doesn’t feel natural, it may need changing. 

Tip 6: Edit, Edit, Edit!

It’s important to revise your personal statement multiple times in order to make sure it’s as close to perfect as possible.

A single typo won’t kill your application, but if your personal statement contains multiple spelling errors or egregious grammar mistakes, you won’t be putting your best foot forward.

ProWritingAid can help you make sure your personal statement is as clean as possible. In addition to catching your grammar errors, typos, and punctuation mistakes, it will also help you improve weaknesses in your writing, such as passive voice, unnecessary repetition, and more.

Let’s look at some of the best personal statements that have worked for successful candidates in the real world. 

Harvard Personal Statement Example

Love. For a word describing such a powerful emotion, it is always in the air. The word “love” has become so pervasive in everyday conversation that it hardly retains its roots in blazing passion and deep adoration. In fact, the word is thrown about so much that it becomes difficult to believe society isn’t just one huge, smitten party, with everyone holding hands and singing “Kumbaya.” In films, it’s the teenage boy’s grudging response to a doting mother. At school, it’s a habitual farewell between friends. But in my Chinese home, it’s never uttered. Watching my grandmother lie unconscious on the hospital bed, waiting for her body to shut down, was excruciatingly painful. Her final quavering breaths formed a discordant rhythm with the steady beep of hospital equipment and the unsympathetic tapping hands of the clock. That evening, I whispered—into unhearing ears—the first, and only, “I love you” I ever said to her, my rankling guilt haunting me relentlessly for weeks after her passing. My warm confession seemed anticlimactic, met with only the coldness of my surroundings—the blank room, impassive doctors, and empty silence. I struggled to understand why the “love” that so easily rolled off my tongue when bantering with friends dissipated from my vocabulary when I spoke to my family. Do Chinese people simply love less than Americans do?

This is an excerpt from a personal statement that got the applicant admitted to Harvard University. The applicant discusses her background as a Chinese-American by musing on the word “love” and what that means within her family.

The writer uses vulnerable details about her relationship with her grandmother to give the reader an understanding of where she comes from and how her family has shaped her.  

You can read the full personal statement on the Harvard Crimson website.

Tufts Personal Statement Example

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver. I saw it in my favorite book, Richard Scarry’s “Cars and Trucks and Things That Go,” and for some reason, I was absolutely obsessed with the idea of driving a giant pickle. Much to the discontent of my younger sister, I insisted that my parents read us that book as many nights as possible so we could find goldbug, a small little golden bug, on every page. I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon. Then I discovered a real goldbug: gold nanoparticles that can reprogram macrophages to assist in killing tumors, produce clear images of them without sacrificing the subject, and heat them to obliteration. Suddenly the destination of my pickle was clear. I quickly became enveloped by the world of nanomedicine; I scoured articles about liposomes, polymeric micelles, dendrimers, targeting ligands, and self-assembling nanoparticles, all conquering cancer in some exotic way. Completely absorbed, I set out to find a mentor to dive even deeper into these topics. After several rejections, I was immensely grateful to receive an invitation to work alongside Dr. Sangeeta Ray at Johns Hopkins.

This is the beginning of a personal statement by Renner Kwittken, who was admitted into Tufts University as a pre-medical student.

Renner uses a humorous anecdote about being a pickle truck driver to describe his love for nanomedicine and how he got involved in his field. You can feel his passion for medicine throughout his personal statement.

You can find Renner’s full essay on the Tufts Admissions page.

Law School Personal Statement Essay Example

For most people, the slap on the face that turns their life around is figurative. Mine was literal. Actually, it was a punch delivered by a drill sergeant at Fort Dix, New Jersey, while I was in basic training. That day’s activity, just a few weeks into the program, included instruction in “low-crawling,” a sensible method of moving from one place to another on a battlefield. I felt rather clever for having discovered that, by looking right rather than down, I eliminated my helmet’s unfortunate tendency to dig into the ground and slow my progress. I could thus advance more easily, but I also exposed my unprotected face to hostile fire. Drill sergeants are typically very good at detecting this type of laziness, and mine was an excellent drill sergeant. So, after his repeated suggestions that I correct my performance went unheeded, he drove home his point with a fist to my face. We were both stunned. This was, after all, the New Army, and striking a trainee was a career-ending move for a drill sergeant, as we were both aware. I could have reported him; arguably, I should have. I didn’t. It didn’t seem right for this good sergeant, who had not slept for almost four days, to lose his career for losing his temper with my laziness. Choosing not to report him was the first decision I remember making that made me proud.

These are the first three paragraphs of an anonymous personal statement by a Wheaton College graduate, who used this personal statement to get into a top-25 law school.

This statement describes a time the applicant faced a challenging decision while in the army. He ended up making a decision he was proud of, and as a result, the personal statement gives us a sense of his character.

You can find the full essay on the Wheaton Academics website.

Here are some common questions about how to write a personal statement.

How Long Should a Personal Statement Be?

The length of your personal statement depends on the specific program you’re applying to. The application guidelines usually specify a maximum word count or an ideal word count.  

Most personal statements are between 500–800 words. That’s a good general range to aim for if you don’t have more specific guidelines.  

Should Personal Statements Be Different for Scholarships?

Many scholarship applications will ask for personal statements with similar prompts to those of college applications.

However, the purpose of a personal statement you’d write for a scholarship application is different from the purpose of one you’d write for a college application.

For a scholarship application, your goal is to showcase why you deserve the scholarship. To do that, you need to understand the mission of the organization offering that scholarship.

For example, some scholarships are meant to help first-generation college students get their degree, while others are meant to help women break into STEM.

Consider the following questions:

Why is this organization offering scholarships?

What would their ideal scholarship candidate look like?

How do your experiences and goals overlap with those of their ideal scholarship candidate?

You can use the same personal anecdotes you’d use for any other personal statement, but you’ll have a better chance of winning the scholarship if you tailor your essay to match their specific mission.

How to Start a Personal Statement

You should start your personal statement with a “hook” that pulls the reader in. The sooner you catch the reader’s attention, the more likely they’ll want to read the entire essay.

Here are some examples of hooks you can use:

A story (e.g. When the spotlight hit my face, I tried to remind myself to breathe. )

A setting description (e.g. My bedroom floor is covered with dirty laundry, candy wrappers, and crumpled sheet music. )

A funny anecdote (e.g. When I was a little kid, my friends nicknamed me Mowgli because of my haircut. )

A surprising fact (e.g. I've lived in 37 countries .)

There you have it—our complete guide to writing a personal statement that will make you stand out to the application committee.

Here’s a quick recap: 

A personal statement is a short essay that shows an application committee who you are

Start with a strong hook that pulls the reader in

Tell a story to engage the reader 

Write in your own voice, not in a formal tone

Good luck, and happy writing!

Hannah is a speculative fiction writer who loves all things strange and surreal. She holds a BA from Yale University and lives in Colorado. When she’s not busy writing, you can find her painting watercolors, playing her ukulele, or hiking in the Rockies. Follow her work on hannahyang.com or on Twitter at @hannahxyang.

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13 Mistakes Students Make When Writing a Personal Statement

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Need help writing a personal statement? You came to the right place!

We've seen everything here at Scribendi, which means we know what makes a good personal statement and what makes a bad one. The bad news is that there's a very fine line. The good news is that we've compiled a list of common mistakes that students make when writing a personal statement. Now, you can learn from the mistakes of others so you don't have to learn them the hard way.

1. Ignoring the rules

If there's one time to think inside the box when writing a personal statement, it's with the technical rules. If there's a required word count, stay inside of it, whatever you do. If they want a specific font type or size, don't try to wow them with your downloaded font pack. If they need a specific file type, make sure your document is in it.

It sounds obvious, but little details like these can be easily overlooked. They're also the first step to getting your foot in the door and onto the desks of the application committee, so color inside of the lines. Doing so will prove that you know how to follow guidelines. Not doing so will get your personal statement a reserved spot in the trash.

2. Failing to answer the question

It's easy to derail from the topic at hand or to answer a question with which you feel more comfortable than the original question posed. However, it's so important to stay on track and show that you are more than equipped to deal with whatever is thrown at you. First, provide an interesting hook—a succinct and engaging sentence to draw readers in and make them want to read more. Then, ensure you follow a clear structure and present a logical flow of thoughts. When answering the question, get to the point as quickly as you can, and stay relevant. If you're not sure whether to include something, keep rereading the question or topic to make sure you're not off track.

3. Making it "one size fits all"

"One size fits all" isn't just a lie in the fashion industry; it's also a lie for personal statements. You shouldn't submit the same personal statement to multiple different schools, just changing the school and program names. Even though the application committee won't know this for sure, they'll get a sense that the whole statement is just a little too generic. Worse, you're proving to yourself that you don't have what it takes to write a different statement for each school, which is a little lazy and pretty insulting to the addressee. So don't do it!

Many hopeful students, especially at the post-grad level, make it a point to show they've done their homework, mentioning particular researchers at the school whom they'd love to work with. Remember that one size never fits all.

4. Taking the "personal" out of "personal statement"

Let's be honest. Nobody wants to hear about the rising tuition costs in America or how the field you're in is progressing at a steady pace. Generalized statements are a killer in personal statements because, of course, the focus should be on you. Talk about how these things affect you specifically. Make your personal statement personal!

Home in on a level of specificity, and keep zooming in until all of the broad statements are vanquished. Instead of talking about rising tuition costs, talk about how you worked two jobs to feed your cat.

On that note, though . . .

5. Telling a sob story

Don't tell a sob story. Everybody has one; it's part of being human.

But you can't let something bad that's happened to you become an excuse. You don't want to rely on it, and you don't want the application committee to think you're trying to gain pity, so it's important that you remain professional. If you have overcome a struggle or a tragedy and it has genuinely influenced or changed you, of course you can and should talk about it. However, try to put a new or positive spin on it when possible. Talk about how working those two jobs was worth it, the different things you learned from your two bosses, or how your experiences made you who you are today.

6. Blasting to the past

In writing a personal statement , you should present yourself as a well-rounded individual but outline your achievements in different areas like academics, athletics, the arts, and your work, volunteer, and social experiences. Make sure, though, that you've moved on from high school. Your experiences should be current and professional.

What you did last weekend is more important than a project you completed three years ago. The application committee wants to know who you are now, not who you once were. What will you do in your free time today, tomorrow, and in the future? It's important that the application committee gets a sense of who you really are.

7. Apologizing and making excuses

Maybe you lack experience. Maybe you've never had a job in your field, or you haven't volunteered enough. Maybe your marks fell halfway through school, or you lost a scholarship. Maybe you don't have any extracurricular activities to list, or you've been out of the game for a while. The worst thing you can do, when faced with these common problems, is to make excuses. Don't even make excuses when they're valid, and don't apologize. There are always explanations for doing poorly, doing nothing, or just not doing the right thing, but they should never be used as excuses. If you absolutely feel the need to address your mistakes, try to talk about what you've learned or how you've grown and changed for the better.

8. Putting on a show

Another common mistake on the flip side of the last is putting on a great big show. Drop the dramatics. If you haven't found a cure for the common cold, then don't act like you have. Can the over-the-top descriptors, adjectives, and adverbs, and let your accomplishments speak for themselves. Similarly, the jargon, the overly academic language, and the stuffy personality have all got to go. It's okay to keep your personal statement simple because that will make it genuine. Write like yourself, and the personal statement will not turn into a drama.

9. Taking the backseat

It's important, though, that you don't take the backseat. This is your personal statement. What is it about you that the application committee needs to know to understand who you are and how you function? How can you best demonstrate your strengths, achievements, and ability to overcome challenges? Which ones have made you the person you are? These are all worth considering.

There will be points where you have to brag a little bit, but do so subtly. Mentioning your achievements is important. Explaining how you made them and what you learned is more important.

10. Forgetting give and take

There's a very fine balance to strike in your personal statement, and it's one that's often overlooked. This is probably the most important tip! Here it is: you need to balance how you can benefit the school in question and how the school in question can benefit you. If you focus too much on the first, you'll come across as arrogant. If you focus too much on the second, you'll come across as desperate. So make sure you balance it out.

What does the school gain from accepting you? That's important to answer, and that's the whole point of writing a personal statement. Answering that question well will get you accepted. At the same time, you have to thoroughly explain what it is about the school that makes it so desirable. Without that, the application committee may believe that you don't think you need its school and that any school will suit your purposes fine. Make sure you give and take!

11. Failing to convey excitement

If you're enthusiastic about the prospect of attending a school, say so! Most students decide to apply for a program because they are excited about the material and the prospect of using the knowledge they'll gain in their future careers. You can also add a touch of altruism by explaining how you hope to harness your passion to help others. For example, if applying to a business program, express your excitement to take advantage of its prestigious alumni roster as well as your hope to help a particular nonprofit. Be specific about why you're excited about the opportunities a school or program will provide.

12. Turning into a cliche

Focus on highlighting unique experiences that could have only happened to you. This will help get your personal statement remembered and cared about. Show that you have energy and passion, that you are committed, and that you are unique (because you are). However, be humble. Unique does not mean "the best." There's always room for improvement, so instead of trying to sound like the best, try to sound irreplaceable. What makes your point of view your very own? That's what you want to demonstrate. Everybody's different, so make sure the application committee understands how you're different by the end of your essay.

13. Thinking it's finished when it's not

Here's the hard truth: one typo can make or break your personal statement. You need to have your personal statement edited and proofread, whether professionally or by a friend or colleague. Seriously, just do it. There's always, always room to improve. Even if you have flawless grammar and spelling (and no typos), perhaps you can work on clarity, tone, structure, or flow. Having others look at your document for you can provide a fresh perspective not unlike that of the application committee. An editor will not only improve the language in your piece but will also give you pointers on how to improve the content. Your personal statement isn't complete unless it's been edited!

Time to start writing!

Now that you know the common mistakes students make, you can avoid them. Writing a personal statement can be a little more than intimidating, but following these suggestions will at least put you ahead of the others. Here's to getting your personal statement on the top of the pile!

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Personal Statement for College: 8 Common Mistakes to Avoid

September 20, 2016

mistakes in personal statement

Writing a good personal statement for college is a tricky task. There are endless ways to write a good essay, as well as endless ideas to draw upon from your own individual life. The smallest experience can be the perfect example of a stand-out quality you want to highlight, and sometimes it is difficult to pinpoint these good experiences to write about. A good personal statement for college is one that is unique, well-written, and demonstrates who you are. The key word here is personal.

But while most of your experiences, honors, and activities are fair game to that end, there are certain topics which are either overly used, poorly executed, poorly received, or a combination of all three. The following list outlines topics to avoid in your personal statement for college.

1. Writing your resumé twice makes you seem boring and uncreative

Perhaps the most common mistake that college applicants make is to re-write their resumé or activities list and call it a personal statement. This is bad for several reasons.

First, it gives admissions officers no information about you that they didn’t already have. In general, the less they know about you, the less likely you are to be admitted.

Second, rewriting your resumé makes you seem uncreative. If you are incapable of writing a 2-3 page paper that doesn’t repeat the other 12 pages you’ve sent the admissions office, then you seem uncreative, or, worse, lazy.

This does not mean that you cannot discuss activities or experiences which also appear on your application; indeed, you almost always should discuss activities and experiences which appear elsewhere. Your personal statement for college is a great time to reinforce and highlight your unique interests and views. However, those activities which you discuss must be related to the broader theme of your personal statement. They should not be a simple recitation of your most impressive awards, honors, etc.

2. Overcoming adversity is only a viable topic in your personal statement for college if you’ve actually overcome adversity

A classic mistake is for college applicants to “invent” adversity in their lives. This often takes the form of re-imagining a small set-back as being equivalent to a life of hardship and tribulation. Students might write about having difficulty in a class, failing a test, or being unpopular in middle school, as evidence that they too have overcome adversity. While it is certainly true that everyone experiences hardship differently, you must understand that from a third party perspective, these sorts of problems do not register as true adversity.

Thus, if you are going to discuss how you overcame adversity in your personal statement for college , be sure that you are discussing a matter with which anyone could sympathize.

On the other hand, if you had to work the night shifts of a part-time job to save up for college, you can feel fairly confident that most admissions officers will not question the challenges you’ve faced. In short, if you have to ask yourself, “Is this really adversity?” the answer is almost certainly no. Remember that you will be applying against individuals who have endured unquestionable adversity: people who have endured war, crippling disease, traumatic violence. That is the standard by which you should assess your struggles.

3. Save the diversity for the diverse candidates

If you lack genuine racial, ethnic, or national diversity, do not depict yourself otherwise in your personal statement. Many applicants try to trump up their distant and attenuated lineage, in the hopes of getting “diversity points” for their application. This is almost always a bad idea. Admissions officers are easily able to spot this sort of ploy for the “diversity points.” So, if your diversity isn’t related to succeeding in college, then it doesn’t belong in your personal statement. That being said, colleges do look for people with varied backgrounds and perspectives - i.e. diversity - so if you come from a unique background, then you should of course highlight this in your personal statement for college or elsewhere on your application.  

4. The “Injured Athlete” Cliché

“After years spent honing my talents, it was devastating to leave the team...”

This is one of the essay topics that appears so frequently in the average  personal statement for college  that they make every admissions officer’s eyes roll. Most students applying to college participate in athletics at some point throughout their high school careers. Many get injured. Unless you were the top Division I field hockey recruit in the country, steer clear of this topic (and even if you were, this topic is still clichéd). The “injured athlete” story is usually similar to the “overcoming adversity” motif. So, to reiterate, you need to make sure that the adversity you face is objectively true.  

5. The “International Sojourn or Tropical Vacation” Cliché

“I learned so much about Mexican culture during my extended stay in Cabo San Lucas.” It is worth noting that tons of students write about the time they spent traveling. For the most part, admissions officers can easily determine when these trips were glorified vacations and when they were meaningful academic, intellectual, or philosophical experiences. It is tempting to write about global connections and experiences in your personal statement for college , but unless your experience abroad was highly standout and unique, this topic is best to avoid because it is overdone.

6. The “Inspiring Relatives” Cliché

“My grandmother has an incredible life story.”

Most of us can relate to being inspired by someone close to us. Our family members have gone through great lengths to help us get to where we are are today. But recounting the great feats that your grandmother met to arrive successfully at the present moment is a bad idea. An admissions officer in most cases would commend your inspiring relative. But they are not evaluating your grandmother’s application. They want to find out about you. Your personal statement for college needs to be, first and foremost, personal . You should be the main character in your essay. Always.

7. Writing about middle school

If you write about your middle school achievements, admissions officers will think you have accomplished nothing of value in high school. Unless your achievements were truly outstanding (for example, you started a successful company that is still in place today), or if the topic you write about is ongoing and still relevant, you should avoid writing about middle school. It is a personal statement for college - make it personal, and make it relevant to college.

8. Trying to do too much

You have 650 words on your personal statement for college , which in the grand scheme of things, is not very many. There is certainly not enough space to highlight everything you have ever done or achieved. Instead, you should focus on choosing a specific time or experience or topic that can stand as an example of your interests and background more generally. In trying to accomplish too much, you will in turn, accomplish very little.

Every part of the application is important. Your GPA and standardized test scores qualify you for certain schools. But sometimes you don’t have the highest SAT score . You can still get into top schools by using your personal statement for college as a chance to set yourself apart. Draw from experiences that are unique, that are personal, and that clearly display your individual interests.

Tags : personal statement tips , college admissions , applying to college , college essay , Personal Statement , personal statement for college

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Things to Avoid in a Grad School Personal Statement? Ultimate Guide with Examples

mistakes in personal statement

by Talha Omer, MBA, M.Eng., Harvard & Cornell Grad

In personal statement tips & advice.

In my earlier post, I shared an ultimate guide on how to write an effective graduate school personal statement and introduced an 8-point framework to guide you in evaluating your personal statement. Building on that foundation, in this post, I’ll delve into the things you should avoid when crafting your graduate school personal statement. 

Additionally, I’ll provide you with a 7-point framework that you can use to circumvent the common pitfalls often encountered in personal statements. By following these guidelines, you’ll be able to create a compelling and polished statement that effectively communicates your unique qualities, experiences, and aspirations, ultimately enhancing your chances of securing a spot in your desired program.

In this Article

1) Being too General or Vague

2) using clichés, 3) providing a lengthy autobiography, 4) overemphasizing your weaknesses, 5) being overly emotional or dramatic, 6) excessive use of jargon, 7) submitting a generic statement, 8) ignoring the prompt or requirements: , 9) plagiarism, 10) poor proofreading, sample 1: evaluate and rate a sample personal statement on the 7-point framework, sample 2: evaluate and rate a sample personal statement on the 7-point framework, sample 3: evaluate and rate a sample personal statement on the 7-point framework, what should you avoid in a grad school personal statement.

In a graduate school personal statement, you want to present yourself in the best possible light and demonstrate your suitability for the program. To avoid undermining your application, here are 10 things you should NOT do in your personal statement:

Summary: Make sure to provide specific examples, experiences, or goals related to your chosen field of study. Avoid generic statements that could apply to any candidate.

A vague statement lacks detail and might apply to many candidates, which doesn’t set you apart or demonstrate your unique qualifications.

To avoid being vague, you should:

  • Clearly articulate your academic and research interests, ensuring they align with the graduate program’s focus.
  • Highlight relevant experiences , such as research projects, internships, or volunteer work, that demonstrate your skills and passion for the field.
  • Discuss your specific goals for your graduate studies and how the program will help you achieve them.
  • Provide examples of accomplishments or experiences that showcase your potential for success in the graduate program.

By being specific, you make it easier for the admissions committee to understand your background, interests, and goals, which can significantly improve your chances of being accepted into the program.

Let’s look at an example from an applicant to a psychology graduate program to illustrate a vague/general statement (bad) and a specific statement (good).

Bad (vague/general):

“Ever since I was young, I have always been interested in psychology. My love for psychology has grown over the years, and now I am excited to pursue my passion at the graduate level. I believe that obtaining a graduate degree will allow me to make a difference in the world.”

This statement is generic and could apply to almost any applicant. It lacks specific details about the candidate’s experiences, skills, or goals in the field of psychology.

Good (specific):

“During my undergraduate studies in psychology at Columbia University, I became fascinated with the cognitive-behavioral approach to therapy. My involvement in a research project examining the efficacy of CBT for patients with anxiety disorders allowed me to develop strong analytical and research skills. I also volunteered at a local mental health clinic, where I co-facilitated a weekly CBT-based support group for individuals struggling with anxiety. These experiences have solidified my interest in pursuing a graduate degree in psychology, with a focus on CBT, to contribute to the development of more effective therapeutic interventions.”

This statement clearly communicates the applicant’s specific interest in cognitive-behavioral therapy and highlights relevant experiences that demonstrate their suitability for the program. It also shows a clear understanding of the field and a well-defined goal for their graduate studies.

Summary: Stand out by avoiding overused phrases and being original in your writing. Show your personality, unique perspective, and genuine motivations for pursuing your degree.

Clichéd statements often rely on overused phrases and generic sentiments that don’t set you apart from other applicants.

To avoid clichés and be original, you should:

  • Reflect on your personal experiences , motivations, and interests that led you to pursue a graduate degree in your chosen field. Authentic insights can help you stand out.
  • Avoid overused phrases and sentiments , such as “ever since I was a child” or “I want to make the world a better place.” Instead, use your unique voice and perspective.
  • Provide specific examples or anecdotes that showcase your personality, creativity, and critical thinking skills, which can help the admissions committee see you as a distinct candidate.
  • Focus on what makes you different from other applicants, such as your unique background, experiences, or perspective on the field.

By being original and avoiding clichés, you can make your personal statement more engaging and memorable, which can significantly improve your chances of being accepted into the graduate program.

Let’s consider an example from a hypothetical applicant to a graduate program in environmental science to illustrate a clichéd statement (bad) and an original statement (good).

Bad (clichéd):

“Ever since I was a child, I have always loved nature and wanted to make the world a better place. I believe that by pursuing a graduate degree in environmental science, I can help save the planet for future generations.”

This statement relies on overused phrases, such as “ever since I was a child” and “make the world a better place,” which don’t set the applicant apart from others. It lacks originality and personal insight into the candidate’s motivations and experiences.

Good (original):

“Growing up in a rural community that faced water scarcity, I developed a deep appreciation for the importance of sustainable water management. As an undergraduate, I focused on hydrology and conducted research on groundwater recharge in my region. My experiences ignited a passion for understanding the complex interplay between human activities and water resources. I am eager to pursue a graduate degree in environmental science to develop innovative solutions for water management challenges that communities like mine face.”

This statement provides a unique perspective, avoiding clichés and offering a personal connection to the field. It demonstrates the applicant’s genuine motivations, specific interests, and relevant experiences that make them a strong candidate for the graduate program.

Summary: Focus on the most relevant experiences and achievements that demonstrate your suitability for the program. Avoid sharing your entire life story or including irrelevant information.

Providing a lengthy, unfocused autobiography can make it difficult for the admissions committee to identify the most relevant information and may weaken the overall impact of your statement.

To be concise and focused, you should:

  • Prioritize your experiences , achievements, and interests that are most relevant to the graduate program you’re applying to. Focus on the aspects that showcase your suitability for the program.
  • Use clear and concise language , avoiding unnecessary details and overly complex sentences.
  • Create a logical structure for your statement, with each paragraph building upon the previous one and leading to a clear conclusion that reinforces your main points.
  • Edit and revise your statement multiple times, eliminating redundancies and ensuring that every sentence contributes to the overall purpose of your statement.

By being concise and focused, you can create a powerful personal statement that effectively communicates your qualifications and passion for the graduate program, which can significantly improve your chances of being accepted.

Let’s look at an example from a hypothetical applicant to a graduate program in business administration to illustrate a lengthy, unfocused autobiography (bad) and a concise, relevant statement (good).

Bad (lengthy autobiography):

“I was born and raised in a small town where my parents owned a local grocery store. As a child, I would often help out at the store, stocking shelves and assisting customers. In high school, I became involved in various clubs and organizations, such as the debate team and the student council. When I started college, I initially pursued a degree in political science but later switched to business administration after taking an inspiring economics course. During my time in college, I also took up tennis and played on the school team, which taught me valuable lessons about teamwork and perseverance.”

This statement provides a broad overview of the applicant’s life but fails to focus on the most relevant experiences and achievements related to the business administration graduate program. It includes extraneous information, such as childhood experiences and hobbies, which dilute the overall impact of the statement.

Good (concise and relevant):

“While pursuing my undergraduate degree in business administration, I interned at a fast-growing startup where I gained hands-on experience in marketing and project management. This experience sparked my interest in the intersection of innovation and business strategy. I also completed a capstone project analyzing the competitive landscape for sustainable packaging solutions, which deepened my understanding of strategic decision-making in the face of evolving market demands. I am eager to build on these experiences by pursuing a graduate degree in business administration, focusing on entrepreneurship and innovation to drive sustainable growth in today’s dynamic business environment.”

This statement highlights the applicant’s relevant experiences and achievements in the field of business administration, demonstrating their suitability for the graduate program. It avoids an extensive recounting of the applicant’s life story and instead focuses on the most pertinent details that showcase their qualifications and interests.

Summary: While it’s important to acknowledge any challenges you’ve faced, focus on how you’ve overcome them and grown as a person. Don’t dwell on negative aspects or make excuses for your shortcomings.

While it’s crucial to be honest about your challenges and setbacks, dwelling too much on them can create a negative impression and cast doubt on your ability to succeed in the program.

To avoid overemphasizing your weaknesses, you should:

  • Maintain a balanced perspective: Discuss both your strengths and accomplishments, as well as any challenges you’ve faced. This helps create a well-rounded representation of your experiences and growth.
  • Focus on resilience and growth: If you mention a weakness or setback, emphasize the steps you took to overcome it and what you learned from the experience. Show how you’ve grown and developed as a result.
  • Be strategic about addressing weaknesses: Choose which weaknesses to mention carefully, and only include those that are relevant and demonstrate your ability to learn from your mistakes. Avoid discussing weaknesses that might raise red flags about your ability to handle the rigors of the graduate program.
  • Keep a positive tone: When discussing weaknesses, maintain an overall positive and confident tone. Focus on your determination, adaptability, and commitment to improvement.

By carefully addressing your weaknesses without overemphasizing them, you can demonstrate your resilience and ability to learn from your experiences, which can create a favorable impression on the admissions committee.

Let’s look at an example from a hypothetical applicant to a graduate program in computer science, illustrating a statement that overemphasizes weaknesses (bad) and a statement that acknowledges challenges while focusing on growth and resilience (good).

Bad (overemphasizing weaknesses):

“In my first semester of college, I struggled with programming and received a C in my introductory computer science course. I was overwhelmed by the complexity of the material and the pace of the course. I often felt discouraged and questioned my abilities to succeed in the field. Despite these early setbacks, I still want to pursue a graduate degree in computer science.”

This statement highlights the applicant’s struggles and negative emotions, which may cast doubt on their ability to handle the rigors of a graduate program. While it’s important to address challenges, it’s crucial to avoid dwelling on them in a way that undermines your application.

Good (acknowledging challenges and focusing on growth):

“During my first semester of college, I encountered initial challenges in my introductory computer science course. However, I recognized the need to develop stronger problem-solving and programming skills to excel in the field. I sought out additional resources, such as tutoring and online courses, and joined a study group to improve my understanding of the material. By the time I completed my undergraduate degree, I had earned consistently high grades in my computer science courses and even served as a teaching assistant for the introductory course. This experience taught me the value of perseverance and adaptability, which I am confident will serve me well in a graduate computer science program.”

This statement acknowledges the applicant’s early challenges but shifts the focus to their growth and resilience. It demonstrates how they took initiative to overcome obstacles and ultimately succeeded, which can leave a positive impression on the admissions committee.

Summary: Share your passion for your field, but avoid excessive emotional language or melodrama. Maintain a professional tone and focus on conveying your ideas clearly and effectively.

While it’s essential to convey your passion and motivation, striking a balance between personal experiences and maintaining a professional tone is key.

To avoid being overly emotional or dramatic, you should:

  • Stay focused on your academic and professional goals: While sharing personal experiences can provide context for your motivation, make sure to connect these experiences to your academic and career objectives.
  • Use a measured and balanced tone: Convey your passion and enthusiasm for your chosen field without resorting to excessive emotion or dramatic language. Aim to maintain a professional and mature tone throughout your statement.
  • Be mindful of your audience: Remember that your personal statement will be read by an admissions committee composed of academics and professionals. They will likely appreciate a statement that is clear, concise, and focused on your qualifications and goals.
  • Show, don’t tell: Instead of relying on emotional language to convey your passion, demonstrate it through examples of your accomplishments, experiences, and commitment to your field.

By avoiding excessive emotion or drama, you can present yourself as a serious and professional candidate for the graduate program, which can enhance your chances of being accepted.

Let’s look at an example from a hypothetical applicant to a graduate program in public health, illustrating a statement with excessive emotion or drama (bad) and a statement with a balanced and professional tone (good).

Bad (overly emotional or dramatic):

“I will never forget the tragic day when my beloved grandmother passed away due to inadequate medical care. Her loss left a gaping hole in my heart, and I vowed to dedicate my life to ensuring that no one else would suffer such a devastating fate. I am determined to fight for better healthcare access, and I believe that earning a graduate degree in public health will give me the power to change the world and save countless lives.”

This statement relies heavily on emotions and dramatic language, which can detract from the overall professionalism of the application. While it’s important to convey your passion, maintaining a balanced tone is key to presenting yourself as a serious candidate.

Good (balanced and professional tone):

“The loss of my grandmother due to inadequate medical care deeply affected me and sparked my interest in healthcare access and equity. As an undergraduate, I volunteered with a local health advocacy organization, where I contributed to community outreach initiatives and policy recommendations to improve healthcare access in underserved areas. I also conducted research on the impact of socioeconomic factors on health outcomes. Pursuing a graduate degree in public health will enable me to develop the skills and knowledge needed to create meaningful change in healthcare policy and practice.”

This statement conveys the applicant’s personal connection and passion for public health while maintaining a professional tone. It focuses on relevant experiences and goals, demonstrating the candidate’s commitment to their field without relying on excessive emotion or drama.

Summary: While it’s essential to demonstrate your knowledge in your field, avoid using technical terms excessively or without proper context. Remember that the admissions committee may not be experts in your specific area of interest.

While it’s essential to demonstrate your knowledge and expertise in your field, relying too heavily on technical terms can make your statement difficult to understand, especially for readers who may not be experts in your specific area of research or study.

To avoid excessive use of jargon, you should:

  • Use clear and concise language: Aim to communicate your experiences, knowledge, and research interests in a way that is accessible to a broad audience, including admissions committee members who may have a different area of expertise.
  • Provide context for technical terms: If you must use technical terms, ensure that you provide enough context and explanation to make their meaning and relevance clear to the reader.
  • Balance technical knowledge with personal insights: While demonstrating your expertise is important, your personal statement should also convey your passion, motivations, and goals. Strike a balance between showcasing your technical skills and providing a personal perspective.
  • Seek feedback from a diverse audience: Share your personal statement with friends, family, or mentors from different backgrounds to ensure that it is comprehensible and engaging to a variety of readers.

By avoiding excessive jargon and focusing on clear and accessible language, you can make your personal statement more engaging and easier to understand, which can improve your chances of being accepted into the graduate program.

Let’s consider an example from a hypothetical applicant to a graduate program in biotechnology, illustrating a statement with excessive jargon (bad) and a statement that effectively communicates the applicant’s knowledge without overusing technical terms (good).

Bad (excessive jargon):

“During my undergraduate research, I employed CRISPR/Cas9-mediated genome editing, qPCR, and next-generation sequencing techniques to analyze the role of non-coding RNAs in the TGF-B signaling pathway and their implications in epithelial-to-mesenchymal transition (EMT) and tumor metastasis. My research elucidated the complex interactions between miRNAs and lncRNAs in modulating cellular response to TGF-B stimulation.”

This statement is heavy on technical terms and jargon, which can make it difficult for an admissions committee member who is not an expert in the specific area of research to understand the applicant’s experiences and accomplishments. It’s essential to provide context and explain the relevance of your work in a more accessible language.

Good (communicating knowledge without overusing jargon):

“In my undergraduate research, I investigated the role of specific RNA molecules in cancer progression, using advanced genetic editing and sequencing techniques. By studying how these molecules interact with a key cellular signaling pathway, I was able to contribute to our understanding of how cancer cells undergo changes that enable them to spread throughout the body. This research experience not only honed my laboratory skills but also deepened my passion for exploring cutting-edge biotechnologies to develop novel therapeutic strategies.”

This statement conveys the applicant’s knowledge and experiences in the field without relying on excessive jargon. It provides context and explains the relevance of the research in a way that is accessible to a broader audience, including admissions committee members who may not be experts in the specific area of research.

Summary: Customize your personal statement for each program you apply to, demonstrating your understanding of the program’s unique features and explaining why you would be a good fit. Avoid using a one-size-fits-all approach.

A generic statement lacks specificity and personalization, which can make it difficult for the admissions committee to understand your unique qualifications, interests, and fit for the program.

To avoid submitting a generic statement, you should:

  • Tailor your statement to the program: Demonstrate your understanding of the specific graduate program and its unique features, such as faculty, research opportunities, or curriculum. Explain why the program aligns with your academic and career goals.
  • Highlight your individual experiences: Share experiences, accomplishments, and insights that are unique to you and showcase your distinct background and perspective.
  • Demonstrate your passion: Convey your genuine enthusiasm for the program and your chosen field, using your own voice and experiences to express your motivations.
  • Research each program: Spend time researching each program you’re applying to, noting key aspects that attract you and set the program apart. Incorporate these findings into your statement to demonstrate your commitment and interest.

By avoiding a generic statement and creating a tailored, personalized personal statement, you can effectively convey your unique qualifications and demonstrate your genuine interest in the graduate program, which can significantly improve your chances of being accepted.

Let’s look at an example from a hypothetical applicant to graduate programs in creative writing, illustrating a generic statement (bad) and a tailored statement that addresses the specific program and institution (good).

Bad (generic statement):

“I have always loved writing and telling stories. Throughout my undergraduate studies, I have honed my writing skills through various workshops and classes. I am eager to pursue a graduate degree in creative writing to further develop my craft and become a successful author. I am confident that a Master of Fine Arts in Creative Writing will provide me with the tools and mentorship necessary to achieve my goals.”

This statement is generic and could apply to any creative writing program. It lacks specific details about the applicant’s interest in the particular program they are applying to and does not demonstrate an understanding of the program’s unique features.

Good (tailored statement):

“I am excited to apply to the Master of Fine Arts in Creative Writing program at XYZ University because of its strong emphasis on the craft of writing and its interdisciplinary approach, which encourages collaboration between writers and artists in other fields. I am particularly drawn to the program’s distinguished faculty, whose work I have long admired, such as Professor Jane Doe, whose innovative storytelling techniques have inspired my own writing. Furthermore, the program’s commitment to fostering a supportive writing community and its annual Writer-in-Residence program make XYZ University an ideal environment for me to grow as a writer and make valuable connections within the literary world.”

This statement is tailored specifically to the creative writing program at XYZ University, demonstrating the applicant’s understanding of the program’s unique features and explaining why they would be a good fit. It shows that the applicant has done their research and is genuinely interested in the particular program and institution, which can make a stronger impression on the admissions committee.

Summary: Carefully read the instructions and make sure to address all required aspects in your statement. Tailor your personal statement to the specific program and institution you are applying to.

Failing to address the specific questions or guidelines provided by the program can create a negative impression and suggest that you’re not genuinely interested in the program or haven’t taken the time to understand its expectations.

To avoid ignoring the prompt or requirements, you should:

  • Carefully read and analyze the prompt: Make sure you understand what the program is asking for and address each aspect of the prompt in your statement. Take note of any specific topics, questions, or themes you need to cover.
  • Follow the guidelines: Pay close attention to any specific guidelines provided, such as word count, formatting, or submission instructions. Adhering to these guidelines demonstrates your attention to detail and respect for the application process.
  • Tailor your statement to the program: Customize your personal statement for each program you’re applying to, demonstrating your understanding of the program’s unique features and explaining why you’re a good fit. Avoid submitting a generic statement that could apply to any program.
  • Review and revise: After writing your personal statement, review it to ensure that you’ve addressed all aspects of the prompt and followed the guidelines. If necessary, make revisions to better align your statement with the program’s expectations.

By addressing the prompt and adhering to the requirements, you can demonstrate your genuine interest in the graduate program and showcase your ability to follow directions, which can significantly improve your chances of being accepted.

Let’s look at an example from a hypothetical applicant to a graduate program in urban planning, illustrating a statement that ignores the prompt or requirements (bad) and a statement that addresses the specific prompt and program (good).

Suppose the prompt asks applicants to discuss their reasons for pursuing a graduate degree in urban planning, their long-term career goals, and how the specific program they are applying to will help them achieve these goals.

Bad (ignoring prompt or requirements):

“My passion for urban planning began during my undergraduate studies in geography, where I learned about the complex relationships between cities and their natural environments. I conducted research on urban heat islands and their impact on energy consumption, and I presented my findings at a regional conference. I have also volunteered with a local non-profit organization focused on creating more sustainable urban spaces.”

This statement provides an overview of the applicant’s background and experiences but fails to address the specific requirements of the prompt. It does not discuss the applicant’s reasons for pursuing a graduate degree, long-term career goals, or how the specific program will help them achieve these goals.

Good (addressing prompt and requirements):

“I am eager to pursue a graduate degree in urban planning to develop innovative and sustainable solutions to contemporary urban challenges. My long-term career goal is to work as a consultant, helping cities implement policies and strategies to mitigate the impacts of climate change and enhance the quality of life for their residents. The urban planning program at XYZ University offers a unique focus on sustainable design and policy, which aligns with my career objectives. Moreover, the program’s strong connections to local government agencies and non-profit organizations will provide valuable networking and internship opportunities that will help me gain practical experience and advance my career.”

This statement directly addresses the prompt by discussing the applicant’s reasons for pursuing a graduate degree, their long-term career goals, and how the specific program at XYZ University will help them achieve these goals. It demonstrates a clear understanding of the program’s unique features and the applicant’s suitability for it.

Summary: Never copy or borrow content from other sources. Your personal statement should be an original piece of writing that reflects your own voice and experiences.

To avoid plagiarism, you should:

  • Write in your own words: Express your thoughts, ideas, and experiences using your unique voice and perspective. Resist the temptation to copy phrases or sentences from other sources or personal statements.
  • Attribute sources when necessary: If you mention a quote, statistic, or idea from someone else, make sure to give proper credit to the original source. This is not common in personal statements, but if needed, ensure you follow appropriate citation guidelines.
  • Be authentic: Be genuine in sharing your experiences, goals, and motivations. Plagiarism is not just about copying words; it also involves presenting someone else’s experiences or ideas as your own. Focus on what makes you unique as an applicant.
  • Use plagiarism detection tools: Before submitting your personal statement, run it through plagiarism detection software to ensure that you haven’t unintentionally copied content from other sources. This will help you identify any issues before submitting your application.

By avoiding plagiarism, you can ensure that your personal statement is an authentic representation of your experiences and aspirations, which can make a positive impression on the admissions committee and increase your chances of being accepted into the graduate program.

Summary: Thoroughly proofread and edit your personal statement to ensure it is free from grammatical errors, typos, or awkward phrasing. Consider asking someone else to review your work for additional feedback.

Grammatical, spelling, and punctuation mistakes can create a negative impression and detract from the professionalism of your application.

To proofread your personal statement effectively, you should:

  • Review your statement multiple times , checking for spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors. Read it out loud, as this can help you catch mistakes you might miss when reading silently.
  • Use writing assistance tools , such as grammar checkers or spell checkers, to identify errors, but do not solely rely on them, as they may not catch every mistake.
  • Share your statement with a trusted friend, family member, or mentor who can provide feedback and help you identify any errors or inconsistencies in your writing.
  • Set your statement aside for a day or two and then revisit it with fresh eyes. This can help you spot errors and make improvements more effectively.

By carefully proofreading your personal statement, you can ensure that it is polished and free of errors, which can create a positive impression on the admissions committee and enhance your chances of being accepted into the graduate program.

A 7-point Framework for Things to Avoid in your Grad School Personal Statement

Based on the above key pitfalls that you should avoid in a grad school personal statement, now I will present a 7-point framework of the things that you should never do in your personal statement. By steering clear of these common pitfalls, you can create a powerful and persuasive statement that truly captures your strengths and ambitions, setting you on the path to success in your graduate studies.

Let’s break down each point to ensure that you have a thorough understanding of what they entail:

  • Being too general or vague: Stay specific and focused on your academic and research interests, relevant experiences, and specific goals.
  • Using clichés: Avoid overused phrases and sentiments; be original and authentic in expressing your motivations and experiences.
  • Providing a lengthy autobiography: Keep your statement concise, focusing on the most relevant experiences and qualifications pertaining to the graduate program.
  • Overemphasizing your weaknesses: Maintain a balanced perspective, addressing weaknesses strategically and emphasizing resilience and growth.
  • Being overly emotional or dramatic: Convey your passion without resorting to excessive emotion or drama; maintain a professional tone throughout your statement.
  • Excessive use of jargon: Use clear and concise language, providing context for technical terms, and balance technical knowledge with personal insights.
  • Submitting a generic statement: Tailor your statement to the specific graduate program, highlighting your unique experiences, and demonstrating your genuine interest.

By avoiding these common pitfalls in your personal statement, you can effectively showcase your qualifications, passion, and fit for the graduate program, increasing your chances of being accepted.

Here is a sample personal statement that was written by a grad school applicant to get admission into the JHU graduate program. Based on the 7-point framework, here’s how the personal statement rates:  

Being too general or vague: The statement does a good job of being specific, detailing the writer’s personal experiences, research background, and motivations.

Using clichés: The statement mostly avoids clichés, but phrases like “staggering number of deaths” and “significant difference in the health of our society” could be rephrased to sound less generic.

Providing a lengthy autobiography: While the statement delves into the writer’s background and experiences, it could benefit from a tighter focus on relevant experiences and achievements that directly relate to the field of breast cancer research.

Overemphasizing your weaknesses: The statement does not dwell on weaknesses, which is a positive aspect.

Being overly emotional or dramatic: The statement opens with a personal story that has emotional resonance, but it does not become overly dramatic. However, some readers might perceive the narrative as slightly emotional, so it’s important to maintain a balanced tone throughout.

Excessive use of jargon: The statement avoids excessive jargon and technical terms, making it accessible to a wider audience.

Submitting a generic statement: The personal statement is tailored to the writer’s experiences and goals, focusing on breast cancer research. However, it could be improved by mentioning specific programs or institutions and explaining why they would be a good fit for the writer’s goals.

Overall, the personal statement is strong in its specificity, focus on relevant experiences, and avoidance of jargon. To improve, the writer might consider refining some phrasing to avoid clichés, focusing even more on experiences directly related to breast cancer research, and tailoring the statement to specific programs or institutions.

Here is a sample personal statement that was written by a grad school applicant to get admission into the education graduate program at TUFTS. Based on the 7-point framework, here’s how the personal statement rates:

Being too general or vague: The statement has a mix of specific experiences and general sentiments, which could be improved by providing more concrete examples of accomplishments and goals related to special education.

Vague: “I believe this will give me tranquility and a realm of my own.”

Improvement: Explain how providing access to education for the less fortunate will specifically contribute to your sense of fulfillment or purpose.

Using clichés: While there are some clichés (e.g., “count my blessings” and “wisdom lies in knowing what to do next”), the overall content is unique and personal. Reducing clichés and replacing them with original insights will further strengthen the statement.

Cliché: “Wisdom lies in knowing what to do next.”

Improvement: Provide a unique insight or lesson learned from your experiences that will guide your future actions.

Providing a lengthy autobiography: The statement covers a wide range of experiences, which can be a strength, but also risks becoming unfocused. Streamlining the narrative to focus on the most relevant experiences related to special education will improve clarity.

Irrelevant detail: “Last year, while ascending Adams peak during a voluntary AIESEC internship at Colombo University, Sri Lanka…”

Improvement: Focus on experiences directly related to special education and how they influenced your decision to pursue graduate studies in the field.

Overemphasizing your weaknesses: The statement doesn’t overemphasize weaknesses, although it could better highlight the author’s growth and resilience in the face of challenges.

Being overly emotional or dramatic: The statement occasionally leans into emotion and drama, particularly in the opening anecdote. The author could consider revising these sections to maintain a more consistent professional tone.

Dramatic: “How lucky I am to have everything on my plate.”

Improvement: Maintain a professional tone by stating how you acknowledge your privileges and want to use them to contribute positively to society.

Excessive use of jargon: Jargon is not an issue in this statement, as it uses clear language and avoids excessive technical terms.

Submitting a generic statement: The statement is personalized with unique experiences and goals. However, it would benefit from more specific details about the graduate program of interest and how it aligns with the author’s ambitions.

Generic: “I believe everyone has a share in shaping the world (no matter how small or big)…”

Improvement: Describe specific ways in which the graduate program will support your goals and enable you to contribute to the field of special education

Here is a sample personal statement that was written by a grad school applicant to get admission into the MSW program. Based on the 7-point framework, here’s how the personal statement rates:

Being too general or vague: This personal statement contains specific experiences, anecdotes, and examples that effectively demonstrate the applicant’s background, interests, and goals.

Using clichés: The statement mostly avoids clichés, presenting unique insights and experiences that make it stand out.

Providing a lengthy autobiography: The statement covers a wide range of experiences, but it is focused on the theme of gender, sexuality, and policy. The content is relevant and effectively demonstrates the applicant’s background and interest in the graduate program.

Overemphasizing your weaknesses: The statement does not overemphasize weaknesses. Instead, it showcases the author’s resilience and determination in the face of challenges.

Being overly emotional or dramatic: While some emotional elements are present, they are appropriate given the topic and contribute to the overall narrative.

Excessive use of jargon: The statement avoids excessive jargon and technical terms, making it accessible and easy to understand.

Submitting a generic statement: The statement is personalized and tailored to the applicant’s unique experiences and goals, effectively illustrating why they are a strong candidate for the graduate program.

In conclusion, crafting a powerful graduate school personal statement is an essential part of your application process. By avoiding these common pitfalls and adhering to the 7-point framework, you’ll be well on your way to creating a captivating and persuasive statement that showcases your strengths, passions, and goals. 

Remember to stay focused, genuine, and professional in your writing, and always tailor your statement to the specific program you are applying to. With careful planning, self-reflection, and attention to detail, you’ll not only enhance your chances of securing a spot in your desired program but also embark on an exciting journey of self-discovery and personal growth.

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mistakes in personal statement

What To Avoid In A Personal Statement: No More Mistakes!

mistakes in personal statement

Making a mistake in your personal statement can have far-reaching consequences , from failing to get an offer to the complete rejection of your application.

Whilst it is rare to make them all, just one of these errors has the potential to derail your application completely!

But what are the personal statement mistakes that you must avoid?

Easily avoidable mistakes in personal statements include irrelevant, unoriginal and illogically structured content alongside poor spelling, punctuation and grammar. Excessive use of quotes, exaggeration and filler content are also serious mistakes, as is the fabrication of facts and experiences.

You can discover more about each of these mistakes below, and make sure that you never make them …

Make Sure all the Content you Write is Original

Borrowed your content from a UCAS personal statement Reddit?

The biggest mistake any candidate can make in their personal statement is copying or paraphrasing content from elsewhere.

When you see outstanding examples of content that seems to relate perfectly to your application, it can be tempting to cut and paste or rewrite elements to make them seem original.

This is always a mistake that you must avoid making.

There are two significant reasons why including unoriginal content in your personal statement is an error. Firstly, if you are copying content from elsewhere, it is highly likely that your personal statement will not pass the stringent plagiarism checks that each application goes through.

If your writing is flagged as unoriginal, the universities you apply to will be alerted to this and are unlikely to make you an offer. If your statement is entirely unoriginal, then your application has a good chance of being rejected , leaving you without any options.

If you’d like to find out more about plagiarism in personal statements, check out my detailed post here .

Don’t forget, your personal statement is an opportunity to evidence your suitability for the course or role you are applying for, and this is the second reason in support of originality. In planning, researching and writing it, you are proving that you have the skills and experience you need to succeed.

If your personal statement is copied from elsewhere, not only are you attempting to access the course fraudulently, but you aren’t preparing yourself as fully as you can for its demands.

You may even find that the course isn’t for you, but by that point, it could be too late to change your decision.

Don’t Tell a Story – Do Follow a Logical Structure

Lots of personal statements that do not make it past the scrutiny of an admissions officer are written in a narrative style. They start by outlining an important or apparently inspirational event in the applicant’s childhood before painstakingly describing each stage of preparation and education in chronological order, ending with a plea for admission.

Alternatively, some candidates try to tell a literal story in their application, often attempting to make allegorical connections between their own experiences and the story they are weaving.

These are not sound approaches to take, and will often put readers off before they have the opportunity to really get to know the candidate, or fully understand their achievements and suitability.

mistakes in personal statement

The extract above tries to draw a parallel and connect the applicant and the university. Still, in reality, this passage gives the reader no positive or relevant information upon which to make the candidate an offer. It is also a tremendous waste of a significant proportion of the available character count. 

This kind of mistake comes top of the list on the uniguide website , so do have a read of that post, when you are finished here.

Write Balanced Content Using your own Voice

If someone were to read your personal statement aloud, it should, with a few exceptions, sound like it was written in your voice . The reader should feel as though you are speaking to them directly, and they should be able to hear the individual quality of your personality coming through clearly.

That can be difficult to achieve without making your personal statement too informal, and it is undoubtedly a big mistake to use exclamations, slang or profanity .

The key to achieving this is to take the time to plan and revise your writing, so that by the time you achieve your final draft, every single phrase, sentence and point you want to make has been carefully considered and communicates its meaning with precision.

If you can achieve this, then the chances are you will have written a balanced and original statement that speaks in your voice and compels the reader to take notice of what you have to say.

UCAS has published a list of the top 10 ‘hackneyed phrases’ that applicants often rely on rather than taking the time to develop original content. If you can avoid these, not only will your application stand out, but you will inevitably be communicating more clearly and originally with the reader.

Unoriginal content is usually bland, generalised and unspecific in terms of its value to the applicant or the institution , so check all of your content against these criteria.

If you want some great advice on the right kinds of sentence starters to use, then take the time to check out my sentence starters post here . In the meantime, I have summarised the phrases that UCAS suggest you avoid in the table below and added several examples of my own for you to consider.

mistakes in personal statement

Write with Relevancy and Connect with Your Subject

Applicants often write about how much they enjoy a subject, or how excited they would be to study it. This can be extremely descriptive, and whilst admissions tutors want to know that you are dedicated and engaged, they are also looking for relevancy and evidence of connection to the subject.

Look at the contrasting examples below. In the first column, the writing is largely descriptive and irrelevant in terms of what the reader needs to know.

The same example has been rewritten in the second column and is not only more relevant, but shows that the writer has a tangible connection to their subject .

mistakes in personal statement

If you are not sure if you are achieving the right balance of relevancy and connection with your subject in your personal statement, then ask yourself these two questions:

Does each point I am making demonstrate that I have engaged with the subject beyond the demands of my current course of study? Does each point evidence the value of my experience in relation to the demands of the course I am applying for? Your Personal Statement Support

UCAS have put together a helpful video on the basics of a compelling personal statement, so check it out once you’ve read the rest of this post…

Get Your Spelling, Punctuation and Grammar Right

Not checking your spelling, punctuation and grammar is a mistake that can have costly consequences when it comes to the success of a personal statement. It is an essential piece of academic writing; consequently, universities will use it to help evaluate your academic potential.

If yours contains errors, it indicates that you may be a weak academic student, disorganised, or may not be dedicated enough to warrant an offer. You can read my helpful post here regarding the best ways to check your personal statement ; it gives you lots of helpful advice for making sure your spelling, punctuation and grammar reflect positively on you.

Another great way to manage this process is to use a software tool like Grammarly . I always recommend it to the applicants I work with because the basic functions are free, the support it offers you is incredibly valuable, and if you get accustomed to using it during your application, you’ll be familiar with it when you start your studies (and that’s where it will be incredibly useful as well).

You can check it out here , or click on the link below to find out more about how to install their free package.

mistakes in personal statement

Avoid Using Excessive Quotations and Titles

The reader wants to learn about the ambitions that drive you and the achievements underpinning them. Using a quote to illustrate your knowledge and understanding can be an excellent strategy, but too many will make your writing less personal, relevant and original.

Using too many quotes can also give the impression that you do not have enough content to complete the application under your own merits, and can become tiresome and predictable.

No one wants to read a list of the things that other people have said.

Equally, repeatedly listing the full titles of books you have read or videos you have watched will take up a valuable chunk of your word count.

The admissions officer or employer want to hear your thoughts, and whilst introducing a quote to argue against or to inspire a new compelling point can be a valuable technique, do not fall into the trap of thinking that quotes make you sound more intelligent.

Your best strategy is to use quotes sparingly, where relevant, and as an opportunity to make an original observation that demonstrates your suitability.

If you want to ensure you have this covered, there’s a detailed guide on quotes and how to use them here .

Don’t Forget to Write About Your Relevant Skills

A common error is to forget to evidence the ways in which the skills you have are relevant to the course. This mistake is based upon two key assumptions made by several candidates each year. If you can avoid making it, you will automatically increase the chances of your application being successful.

The first assumption that causes unsuccessful candidates to make this kind of mistake is failing to realise that universities and employers need to see tangible evidence of their suitability .  

If this is included in your personal statement, then the admissions tutor reading it can connect your experiences with the demands of the course and be reassured that you will complete it successfully. It is in no one’s interest for students to drop out.

Explain what you can bring to a course and try not to just list experiences, but describe how they have given you skills that will help you at university. James Seymour, University of Gloucestershire

The second mistake is more personal and is rooted in a misguided sense of modesty. Even when applicants realise that outlining the value of relevant skills is an important part of the process, they can fail to include this content as it seems to be boastful or too self-centred.

Simply listing skills and experiences that support your application isn’t compelling enough , but connecting academic, practical or experiential knowledge with the content of the course you are applying for is not boastful, it is essential.

Edit Your Content to Remove Irrelevant Filler

Not editing down your personal statement and removing excess content can have an incredibly damaging effect on your chances of success, for three reasons.

  • Admissions tutors and employers are busy. If it takes them a long time to work through the irrelevant content that you have included, then chances are that they will give up long before they get to the end. If that happens, some of the important content that is worth reading will be ignored or even missed entirely. You know how frustrating it is to read a blog post or an article that just won’t get to the point, so don’t put the reader in that situation.
  • If you include unnecessary material in your final draft, it can be a clear sign to the reader that you do not have enough content of value to include. In turn, that sends the signal that your application is not as prepared as it should be, by comparison with other candidates. This could be viewed as laziness, disengagement or simply as a lack of academic suitability. In any case, it is not the impression you want to give.
  • If you have not edited out all extraneous content, and you are working to a word or character count, there is every chance that you will not have the room you need to include all the elements a personal statement requires. That can lead to you cutting compelling content in favour of descriptive filler, or not including core elements in the first place.

Put simply, each word needs to earn its place by adding value, so remember your ABC’s …

  • Show APTITUDE
  • Evidence BROADER KNOWLEDGE
  • CONNECT with your subject.

Keep Everything Truthful and do not Exaggerate

Very few applicants set out to purposefully lie in their personal statement. Those that do quickly fall foul of the rigorous verification systems employed by organisations such as UCAS. Material that is purposefully plagiarised or included with the intention to deceive is taken extremely seriously. As UCAS reports:

We have a responsibility to our applicants, course providers, and stakeholders to screen applications for false, missing and/or misleading information, check personal statements for patterns of similarity, and to report our findings. UCAS

You must not knowingly include false material in your statement, or elsewhere in your application.

It is much more likely that, if you do include a falsehood in your application, it will be due to exaggeration or error. Whilst that can be understandable in a few contexts, the end result is still likely to be the rejection of your application.

Here are the top mistakes that you need to avoid when it comes to falsehoods and exaggeration in your personal statement:

Above all, remember that there are no secrets or unwritten rules to writing a mistake-free personal statement.

Most mistakes can be avoided through the application of some common sense, some technique and lots of time and effort spent developing the right content .

Writing a personal statement should be an exciting and fulfilling process that crystalizes your thinking and clarifies your suitability.

If that’s how you approach the task, then you are unlikely to make too many errors.

Good luck with your personal statement, and don’t forget to contact me if you’d like some 1-1 support. You’ve got this! D

Research and content verified by Personal Statement Planet.

David Hallen

I've worked in the Further Education and University Admissions sector for nearly 20 years as a teacher, department head, Head of Sixth Form, UCAS Admissions Advisor, UK Centre Lead and freelance personal statement advisor, editor and writer. And now I'm here for you...

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Personal Statement Mistakes: 5 Common Errors to Avoid

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by  Antony W

September 5, 2021

mistake to avoid when writing a personal statement

Nothing hurts more than a rejected college application, especially if the reason is that your personal statement wasn’t up to the standard that an admissions board expected.

Sure, a personal statement requires you to tell a story about yourself and answer important questions about the program you’d like to apply to. But completing this paper requires more than just your ability to meet the expected word count.

You need to know how to write a personal statement to get this assignment right. Still, it doesn’t actually end there. You also need to know the kind of mistakes to avoid if you want your personal statement to get an approval from the admissions team.

In the following section, we’ll highlight some of the most common mistakes that shouldn’t appear in a personal statement. If you notice any of these mistakes appearing in your write up, go back and fix them before submitting your application.

Common Mistakes to Avoid When Writing a Personal Statement

1. failing to answer the question asked.

failing to answer question as asked

When you first read the definition of a personal statement, the description may sound like this is a more open-ended assignment. While it’s more about telling an admissions panel about yourself so that they get to know you better to determine if you are fit for the program, it doesn’t mean you can write whatever you like.

More often than not, the panel will give questions that they would like answered in a personal statement.

The worst mistake you can make is to answer your own version of the question.

A right approach to getting the personal statement right is to read the questions asked alongside the requirements of the work. This will enable you to understand what the panel expects.

But how do you know you have answered all the questions correctly? It’s simple. Ask someone else to read the essay and give his or her neutral view.

Also Read: How to Write a Personal Statement

2. Using a Technical Academic Language to Look Showy Instead of Being Clear and Relevant

using a simple language in personal statement

There is nothing worse in writing a personal statement than dressing it up with complex words and phrases. If the statement requires an admissions committee to have cups of coffee and dictionaries on the table, then it’s already a big fail.

To be clear, there is nothing wrong with knowing a dense language, but what’s the point of merging it into your writing if the target reader won’t understand the message you intend to communicate?

Instead of adding complex and showy verbs, adverbs, adjectives, quotes, and vocabularies, dress your statement with a simple language that even a grade 6 student can read and understand.

Don’t worry; using a simple language won’t make you look too foolish to apply for a college diploma or university degree. On the contrary, it proves that you care more about being clear and precise with your application.

3. Using Generic Statements

not using generic statements in personal statement

A personal statement that features generic phrases can be very boring to read. Not only do they show your lack of disinterest in an application, they also fail to convince an admissions board that you’re a perfect candidate to consider.

When it comes to writing a personal statement, you have zero room for vagueness. So you can’t take your chances.

Remember that in this writing, every sentence count. To stand out from many other applicants, back every statement with your real life experiences as well as examples.

Re-read your personal statement and highlight vague words and phrases, and then improve them. Show how and why an event or experience is important to use instead of just stating it.

Also Read: Personal Statement vs Statement of Purpose

4. Writing More Words than Expected

stick to personal statement word count

Writing too much doesn’t mean you’ll stand out from the crowd. It’s the quality of the information that you provide that will matter at the end of the day.

To be clear, an admissions board may give you a word count to work with as you write your personal statement. In some cases, they won’t. Whether they give you a word limit for the essay or not, you shouldn’t write less than 500 words or more than 700 words.

In other words, a good personal statement should be between 500 and 700 words long.

Sure, you may have many good things to say about yourself and thus fall for the temptation of making the document longer. But if you’re honest with yourself, some of your points will be stronger than others are. So it’s best to include only the strongest statements to establish a good connection with the admissions panel while sticking to the suggested word count.

5. Poor Writing and Grammatical Errors

avoid grammar mistakes in personal statement

This is one of the personal statement mistakes that students make.

Your writing has to be up to the standard from the first sentence to the last. So you can’t compromise on your writing skills for any reason whatsoever.

From vocabulary and choice of words to grammar use and sentence structure, your writing skills must be up to the best standard if your personal statement must win the attention of an admissions panel.

As soon as you complete writing your personal statement, go back to the very beginning of the paper and proofread your work thoroughly. Identify words and phrases that neither add meaning nor make sense and delete them from the statement.

If it helps, get a friend or a family member and let them read your statement and give you their opinion. The advantage is that they will read the statement and give you their perspective. You can then go a step further and use their suggestions to improve the quality of your personal statement.

Let Help for Assessment Write Your Personal Statement

While writing a good personal statement isn’t impossible, it can be challenging. If you have no idea how to approach the project, chances are you may more than likely write a low quality personal statement.

But you don’t have to risk your chances of being accepted. Simply reach out to us and we’ll help you write a personal statement that will get you noticed by an admissions board.

Our team of writers and editors has what it takes to write the best in-class personal statement for you.

About the author 

Antony W is a professional writer and coach at Help for Assessment. He spends countless hours every day researching and writing great content filled with expert advice on how to write engaging essays, research papers, and assignments.

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