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Because they are both aggressively quirky globe-trotting caper comedies involving missing works of art, both were made by hugely popular producer/stars allowed to indulge in their every possible whim, and both seem destined to share the same ignominious box-office fate (if the otherwise completely empty screening I attended is any indication), there is the distinct possibility that many of the reviews of "Mortdecai," at least those written by people with longer memories, may refer to it as being Johnny Depp 's "Hudson Hawk." This is a patently unfair comparison to make and not just because I am one of those rare birds who actually found "Hudson Hawk" to be a fairly hilarious romp that will one day be rediscovered and properly worshipped. No, even if I hated that film as much as most people did back in the day, it would still stand head and shoulders above this absolutely bewildering waste of time, talent, energy and money.

The thing about bad movies is that in most cases, their badness is fairly self-explanatory in that you can quickly grasp what went wrong with them. A film like " The Boy Next Door ," for example, is utterly inept but considering the fundamental stupidity of its basic premise, that result could hardly be considered a surprise. With other bad films, you can sort of understand what the intentions of the filmmakers might have been before things went wrong. "Mortdecai," on the other hand, is one of those rare birds that is so off-putting in so many ways that all I could do for the most part was wonder how so many presumably intelligent people could be persuaded to sign on to produce and appear in something that could not have possibly seemed like anything other than a total mess from its earliest stages.

Depp stars as Charlie Mortdecai, a borderline dissolute roué and cad who works as an art dealer of questionable means and morals who, as the film opens, owes the British government over 8 million pounds in back taxes and is in danger of losing everything, with the possible exception of his recently cultivated walrus-style mustache. One person who wouldn't mind seeing him lose the stache as well is his otherwise loving and infinitely patient wife Johanna ( Gwyneth Paltrow ), whose gag reflex goes into overdrive whenever she comes into close contact with the soup strainer in question, a trait that is sympathetically shared by both Mortdecai and, presumably, most members of the audience. 

Because of his ability to navigate the seamier areas of the art world, Mortdecai is pressed into service by MI-6 agent (and long-standing rival for Johanna's affections) Martland ( Ewan McGregor ) to help in the search for a missing Goya painting that is even more valuable because of a rumor that it may have a code leading to a fortune in Nazi gold scribbled on its back. With his trusty manservant Jock Strapp--yes, Jock Strapp ( Paul Bettany )--at his side, Mortdecai bounces back and forth between London, Moscow and Los Angeles on the trail of the painting and stumbles into one desperate escapade after another that usually results in Jock getting shot, stabbed or otherwise injured along the way. Meanwhile, Johanna begins her own pursuit of the painting as well and uses her wiles to get Martland, who still has a thing for her, to fork over important information along the way.

Based on the 1973 novel "Don't Point That Thing at Me," allegedly the first in a series of books featuring the Mortdecai character, "Mortdecai" is a film whose entire comedic foundation is based on two elements--funny-looking mustaches and Johnny Depp's ability to do a mildly passable impression of Terry-Thomas . I will concede that these two things could be amusing under the right circumstances but only for a short amount of time and certainly not for a seemingly endless 106 minutes. And yet, screenwriter Eric Aronson keeps coming back to those particular wells over and over despite having thoroughly mined whatever comedic ore they might have held after the first five minutes. Beyond that, the screenplay is a ghastly collection of self-consciously plummy dialogue, jokes that aren't so much ribald as rabid, and, when all else fails, various forms of gagging and/or vomiting. Trying and failing to make something out it all is director David Koepp (" Premium Rush "), who knows how to direct smart, canny entertainments, but who hasn't done so here.

As for Johnny Depp, he delivers another one of the self-consciously campy turns that he has been giving viewers in lieu of an actual performances--not only is it a one-joke characterization, the joke is on the level of a below-average knock-knock joke. Like the film as a whole, this performance is such a spectacular miscalculation that it begins to generate a strange fascination in that you almost want to keep watching just to see how much worse it can possibly get before it finally comes to a merciful and long-overdue conclusion. While Depp is delivering enough bad acting for at least four movies, his co-stars (beyond those already cited, Jeff Goldblum and Olivia Munn also turn up as a sleazy American art dealer and his nymphomaniac daughter) barely bother to make anything resembling an effort, perhaps in the belief that if they do as little as possible, no one will notice that they are even there amidst Depp's flailings.

When the definitive biography of Johnny Depp is finally written, I know that I will immediately turn to the chapter focusing on "Mortdecai" so that I can finally figure out what in God's name he and everyone else involved was thinking when they made it. My guess is that it will prove to be far more entertaining and interesting than the film itself.

Peter Sobczynski

A moderately insightful critic, full-on Swiftie and all-around  bon vivant , Peter Sobczynski, in addition to his work at this site, is also a contributor to The Spool and can be heard weekly discussing new Blu-Ray releases on the Movie Madness podcast on the Now Playing network.

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Mortdecai (2015)

Rated R some language and sexual material

106 minutes

Johnny Depp as Charles Mortdecai

Olivia Munn as Georgina Krampf

Gwyneth Paltrow as Johanna

Ewan McGregor as Inspector Martland

Jeff Goldblum

Paul Bettany as Jock Strapp

• David Koepp
• Eric Aronson

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Summary Juggling some angry Russians, the British Mi5, his impossibly leggy wife and an international terrorist, debonair art dealer and part time rogue Charlie Mortdecai (Johnny Depp) must traverse the globe armed only with his good looks and special charm in a race to recover a stolen painting rumored to contain the code to a lost bank account ... Read More

Directed By : David Koepp

Written By : Eric Aronson, Kyril Bonfiglioli

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Mortdecai, film review: Johnny Depp is good value but the dialogue is dull and dim-witted

(12a) david koepp, 107 mins starring: johnny depp, gwyneth paltrow, ewan mcgregor, paul bettany, article bookmarked.

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Mortdecai is reminiscent of some of the wildly misfiring comedies that Peter Sellers used to make in the 1960s and 1970s – the worst of the Pink Panther films, or the star-studded fiascoes such as the 1967 Casino Royale. There are some laughs along the way but not nearly enough of them.

Johnny Depp, at least initially, is good value as the gap-toothed British aristocrat and art-thief hero, forever preening his moustache and speaking in a leering voice that is part Uncle Monty and part Leslie Phillips. As his wife, Johanna, Gwyneth Paltrow enjoys adopting a very supercilious English accent and playing the upper-class English rose type. There is a funny cameo from Depp's old mucker Paul Whitehouse as a Spanish car mechanic and some of the slapstick involving Paul Bettany as his priapic, injury-prone manservant Jock Strapp just about works in its own sub-Benny Hill way.

The downside is an incredibly convoluted script involving a stolen Goya painting, random changes of location (we are whisked, for no particular reason, from London to Moscow to LA), too many gags involving vomit and rotting cheese, and some incredibly dull and dim-witted dialogue that would barely have passed muster in a bad British 1970s sitcom.

The director David Koepp is a distinguished screenwriter but, on this evidence, he doesn't have much flair for staging comedy. The producers have suggested this might be the start of a Mortdecai franchise, but it is hard to see much point in giving the old cove a second outing.

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Review by Brian Eggert January 22, 2015

Lowbrow parades as highbrow in Mortdecai , a bauble-of-a-movie hoping to become the next generation of Pink Panther style comedies about an inept detective of sorts. Johnny Depp plays Charlie Mortdecai, a scampish fine art dealer who, well-versed in the trading and thievery of art, occupies a throwback farce akin to Gambit , How to Steal a Million , and the Inspector Clouseau series (all titles from the 1960s). Hollywood already tried—and quite miserably failed—to rehash such material last year with the Coen Brothers-scripted, Michael Hoffman-directed remake Gambit . And Mortdecai is just slightly more tolerable, if only because its cast and production values are top-drawer. Still, this madcap caper exists only to provide an excuse for the movie’s crude zaniness and gratingly repetitive gags.

An all-star cast assembles for director David Koepp, whose experience as the screenwriter of Jurassic Park and Mission: Impossible gives way to his recent, certainly lesser directorial aspirations. Until now, Koepp has proven a versatile workhorse filmmaker with solid genre exercises to his credit. His spooky thrillers Stir of Echoes (1999) and Secret Window (2004) at least benefited from his own contributions to those screenplays, as did his underrated comedy Ghost Town (2008) and his impressive actioner Premium Rush (2012). This isn’t the case with Mortdecai . Koepp directs and scripter Eric Aronson (whose sole credit prior to this was the Lance Bass movie On the Line from 2001) works from Kyril Bonfiglioli’s 1973 novel Don’t Point That Thing at Me , one of the author’s four books about the Charlie Mortdecai character.

Alongside his central star, Koepp wrangles a cast of attractive faces including Gwyneth Paltrow, Ewan McGregor, Paul Bettany, Olivia Munn, and Jeff Goldblum—all of whom take a distant second seat to Depp. The actor’s overwrought performance as a proper, yet absurdist English chap relies on Peter Sellers-level silly mannerisms. Mortdecai’s dim-witted, slight effeminate persona in Depp’s hands feels like the actor combined a number of earlier roles into one (if his Ed Wood and Ichabod Crane had a baby with his Hunter S. Thompson, and became a well-to-do British aristocrat, the child might be something like Depp’s Mortdecai). Followed by his tough, Cockney manservant Jock (Bettany), who’s always getting Mortdecai out of harm’s way, our hero is a bungling idiot. It’s no wonder that a subplot involves his wife Johanna (Patrol) flirting with a former college suitor-turned-MI5 agent Martland (McGregor); we’re constantly asking ourselves what this otherwise intelligent woman sees in such a man.

Mortdecai is all about putting a buffoon into a situation and allowing him to mess it all up. Around him are a number of straight characters, present to smooth things over as he perpetuates out-of-control situations. Jock, Johanna, and Martland each trail behind Mortdecai, picking up the pieces in one manner or another. Much like Trance , the caper itself involves a long-thought-lost Goya painting and a number of unscrupulous parties invested in recovering it. Since Mortdecai is an expert in such things, Martland tasks him to locate the painting, in part to settle the Mortdecai Estate’s past due balance to the country for previous indiscretions. While barely managing to stay alive and not come up with a single original idea, Mortdecai aimlessly floats from one locale to another, and finally takes part in a switcheroo at an art auction.

Several ongoing comedic bits consume the movie. None of them produce a laugh. There’s a recurring bit about Mortdecai’s unfortunate habit of shooting Jock by accident. Another concerns Jock’s talent for shagging random women. Yet another involves the barf-o-rama that ensues after an L.A. party serves bad shellfish. No recurring bit is more prevalent than the one about Mortdecai’s new mustache, which Johanna despises and causes her to gag, in turn causing Mortdecai to gag because he has a “sympathetic gag reflex.” (The gagging bit goes on and on too.) He’s proud of his coiffed upper lip, as mustaches run in his family, and so he stubbornly refuses to shave. Dull repetition also appears as the movie hops from Moscow to London to Los Angeles, and Koepp ties everything together with zoomy transitions that spin the movie’s locations like a cheap CG globe.

Though Mortdecai tries to pass a lesser painting off by hiding a masterpiece behind the surface in the movie’s climax, there’s nothing brilliant underneath this movie (except maybe the posh interiors as shot by cinematographer Florian Hoffmeister). But plot twists and double-crosses seem less important than the prevalence of moustache-, potty-, and sex-related humor. Strangely, the movie has been R-rated for language (one negligible derivation of “fuck”) and brief nudity, but those moments were throwaways and could have been trimmed for a wider PG-13 audience. Indeed, few adults will savor the grueling unfunny and childish brand of humor (for example, Jock’s last name is Strapp). The movie is better suited for younger audiences—namely those who enjoyed the Austin Powers series, or those who might find Depp’s cartoony, over-gestured onscreen presence entertaining, or those who haven’t yet grown tired of this actor’s neverending pageant of outlandish characters.

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Mortdecai (2015)

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Mortdecai Review

23 Jan 2015

107 minutes

A cross between The Fast Show’s “very, very drunk” Rowley Birkin QC and a particularly randy dandy, Johnny Depp’s Charlie Mortdecai is a degenerate art dealer who prats about the globe in this hyperposh panto based on the comic crime novels of Kyril Bonfiglioli. Broad and bonkers, the film revels in its verbosity – Jeff Goldblum is a “thick-fingered vulgarian” – but lacks solid jokes, instead relying on the outlandishness of its arch characters and some upper-class farce to see it through. Very close to disastrous, there's an unavoidable feeling that Gwyneth Paltrow and co. are having much more fun than you are, what?

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Johnny Depp portrays the debonair title character in director David Koepp's comic caper 'Mortdecai.' (David Appleby/Lionsgte)

• David Appleby
• Copy article link

Paul Bettany gives Johnny Depp a lift in director David Koepp's comic caper 'Mortdecai.' (David Appleby/Lionsgte)

Gwyneth Paltrow and Johnny Depp star in director David Koepp's comic caper 'Mortdecai.' (David Appleby/Lionsgte)

Johnny Depp, left, and Jeff Goldblum star in director David Koepp's comic caper 'Mortdecai.' (Stephne Vaughan/Lionsgte)

• Stephen Vaughan

Gwyneth Paltrow and Ewan McGregor star in director David Koepp's comic caper 'Mortdecai.' (Stephen Vaughan/Lionsgte)

'Mortdecai' movie reviews: What critics are saying about Johnny Depp's comic farce

• Mike Scott, NOLA.com | The Times-Picayune
• Jan 23, 2015
• Jan 23, 2015 Updated Jul 17, 2019
• 2 min to read

When it comes to the new Johnny Depp film "Mortdecai," you've got to say this much: It's a new Johnny Depp film. Beyond that, though, if you're looking for potential positives, all bets are off.

The quirky Depp tries on a quirky new character in director David Koepp's comic farce, which is based on the title character from a series of cult British novels -- and which Lionsgate is reportedly hoping to build a franchise around. While the trailer might look promising in a Wes Anderson-styled way -- and with an impressive supporting cast that includes Gwyneth Paltrow, Ewan McGregor, Paul Bettany and one killer 'stache -- it doesn't appear to be getting off to a good start.

Koepp's film wasn't screened widely for critics, which should be the first red flag for suspicious moviegoers. Now, the first reviews are trickling in, and the makers of "Mortdecai" should be mortified.

Of the 16 reviews posted on movie-review aggregator Rotten Tomatoes as of Thursday afternoon (Jan. 22), only one was positive, giving the film an abysmal 6 percent approval rating. At Metacritic , the results weren't much better, with "Mortdecai" earning a score of 23/100 (but on just six reviews), also as of Thursday afternoon.

Below, find a sampling of what critics are saying about "Mortdecai." If what they say is correct, reading them just might be more enjoyable than watching the film.

Stephen Dalton, The Hollywood Reporter : "Any film credited with its own 'mustache wrangler' really should have been much more fun than Johnny Depp's latest misfiring action-comedy. ... Despite a heavyweight cast and the solid directing skills of A-list screenwriter David Keopp ('Jurassic Park,' 'Panic Room,' 'Spider-Man'), this charmless farce ends up as another black mark on Depp's recent track record of patchy pet projects." ( Read full review .)

Alfonso Duralde, The Wrap: "While watching this new caper, I was reminded why movies like this are called souffles in the first place: if they don't stay perfectly aloft, they collapse." ( Read full review .)

Elizabeth Weitzman, New York Daily News : "Johnny Depp has done so much for us. Let us now return the favor and pretend 'Mortdecai,' a disastrously misjudged career low, never existed." ( Read full review .)

Robbie Collin, The (U.K) Telegraph : "It's hard to think of a way in which the experience of watching the new Johnny Depp film could be any worse, unless you returned home afterwards to discover that Depp himself had popped round while you were out and set fire to your house. ... Psychotically unfunny." ( Read full review .)

Guy Lodge, Variety: "The film shoots for the swinging insouciance of '60s farce, but this story of a caddish art dealer enlisted by MI5 to assist in a knotty theft case is longer on frippery than quippery: There's a fatal shortage of zingers to supplement its exhausting zaniness. Only particularly dedicated devotees of Johnny Depp's latter-day strain of mugging -- here channeling Austin Powers by way of P.G. Wodehouse -- will delight in this expensive-looking oddity." ( Read full review .)

And the one positive review on Rotten Tomatoes so far ...

Scott Mendelson, Forbes : "Johnny Depp's scenery-chewing lead occasionally grates, but 'Mortdecai' works as a low-stakes comic mystery that is refreshingly aimed squarely at adult moviegoers. It does not deserve the 'not screened for critics' badge of dishonor." ( Read full review .)

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• DVD & Streaming
• Action/Adventure , Comedy

Content Caution

In Theaters

• January 23, 2015
• Johnny Depp as Mortdecai; Gwyneth Paltrow as Johanna; Paul Bettany as Jock; Ewan McGregor as Inspector Martland; Olivia Munn as Georgina; Jeff Goldblum as Krampf

Home Release Date

• May 12, 2015
• David Koepp

Distributor

Movie review.

Lord Charlie Mortdecai is broke.

Well, as broke as a lord like him can be. After all, he still has a few days to come up with the 8 or 10 million pounds he needs to pay back taxes and the like. But, surely, with a bit of footwork and a little madcap Mortdecai elbow grease he can liquidate some of his estate’s lesser artworks and come up with the needed cash.

He’s even grown a very dashing mustache to show how serious he is in his quest. All the Mortdecai men, at some point, have grown a splash of debonair facial hair as a way of putting their best face forward, so to speak. And this is Charlie’s time.

Now, the fact that his impossibly leggy wife, Johanna, gags every time she even considers kissing his newly hairy upper lip is a tad disconcerting. But he’ll work through that. Wasn’t it Margaret Thatcher who once said, “Kissing a man without a mustache is like eating an egg without salt”? So that settles it! This is a new look and a new beginning for one Charlie Mortdecai.

And, indeed, no sooner has he grown out the first stages of his suave soup-strainer than his old college friend, MI5 Inspector Martland, approaches him with a case that will surely set his financial house aright. There is a murder to solve and a missing Goya painting to find, it seems. All Charlie need do is use his numerous art dealer contacts and find a few clues to the mystery.

Granted, there’s something dark in the midst of this tomfoolery. There are Russian thugs and an international terrorist in the mix. And even rumors of some rather nasty characters seeking out Nazi gold. But pishposh, Charlie can handle himself. Besides, his manservant, Jock, is a loyal sort and good with his fists. Together they can take care of anything dangerous that may pop up along the way.

Ah, this is all starting to feel so positive. Good breeding, good looks and a good mustache. What else does one possibly need?

A cleaner telling of the story, maybe?

Positive Elements

For all their flirtations with the idea of having an affair with someone else, both Charlie and Johanna ultimately make it clear that they’re dedicated to their marriage. And both are willing to make sacrifices to maintain that relationship. Jock repeatedly puts himself in danger to fight off Charlie’s attackers.

Sexual Content

Early on it’s stated that Jock has the ability to bed nearly any attractive female he happens upon. To prove it, apparently, we’re shown a number of his conquests in various states of undress—from a woman sporting an unbuttoned shirt to a lady dressed in nothing but panties and a cleavage-boosting top. In one case we hear Jock and his girlfriend (for the night) having loud sex in the next room over. And in another we see him and another woman—who turns out to be a newly minted mother who just stepped away for a moment from her husband and child—after they’ve had sex in an airplane’s lavatory.

When Charlie and Jock fly to Los Angeles, Charlie makes note of the fleshy sensuality on display around them (in the form of scantily clad women). “I feel as if we’ve taken a wrong turn and walked onto the set of a pornographic film,” he quips. While in the States, Charlie also meets up with a wealthy American businessman named Krampf and his “nympho” daughter Georgina. Georgina soon invites him to fondle and squeeze her breasts, and later makes other seductive moves on him. Krampf interrupts them but says there will likely still be time for Charlie to have sex with his daughter before dinner. Georgina and another man openly kiss and grope each other.

Johanna and Georgina both wear formfitting and revealing outfits that the camera gladly ogles. Johanna wears skimpy nightclothes, and we see her from the back (waist up) as she slips naked into a bathtub with Charlie. After a flirtatious interaction, Charlie walks out of his wife’s bedroom sporting a very visible (clothed) erection. In a flashback, a college student walks in on Johanna and Charlie’s sexual interlude. (The pair is naked but strategically covered.) We see a number of classical nude paintings hanging on the walls. Charlie makes mention of attending Eaton University where “b-ggery” was rampant. Thinly veiled sex jokes and double entendres pepper the script, dealing with topics ranging from infidelity to lust.

Violent Content

We see a woman slump over dead after being shot in the back with an arrow. A man keels over on his desk when he’s stabbed to death. One thug nearly lops off one of Charlie’s fingers with a large knife, and others attempt to do the same to Jock. Mobsters pull down Charlie’s pants and move to attach a car battery to his boxer-clad testicles.

On a number of occasions Jock takes on several foes at a time in visceral fistfights, smashing windows, doors, tables, shelves and various other bits of scenery around them. He’s set on fire. He’s attacked by a Doberman Pinscher. He’s shot multiple times.

Various car chases result in lots of smashed sheet metal and people being thrown around. A guy is thumped in the head by a chunk of wood. A man swings a straight razor while fighting in a car. Some stumbling buffoonery results in a chain reaction explosion that blows out an entire hotel room. Somebody gets sprayed in the face with Mace.

Crude or Profane Language

Two f-words. Three or four uses each of “d–n” and “h—.” And one or two each of “b–ch,” “b–tard” “bloody” and “b-gger.” Unusual yet evocative crudities are used to describe anatomical body parts (“bismark,” “bone” and “tagger” among them). Jesus’ and God’s names are misused a couple of times apiece.

Drug and Alcohol Content

Charlie generally has a glass of something like port at hand wherever he goes—from his sitting room to the back of his limo to the bathtub. In fact, Charlie directly addresses his unquenchable need for alcohol, saying, “I’ll have you know that I am not an alcoholic, I’m a drunkard. There’s a difference.”

And Charlie’s not alone in that department. Nearly everyone else around him is ready to down a glass or two at any bar or social gathering. Even Inspector Martland is instantly eager for a glass of wine, while on duty or not.

Charlie gets injected with some kind of knockout drug. And a vial of some noxious drug is sprinkled over a banquet table, causing some to get violently ill.

Other Negative Elements

That last scene is rife with vomit-filled sight gags.

In the mid- to late-1970s, English author Kyril Bonfiglioli created a very popular four-part series of comic-thriller novels about an aristocratic toff of an art dealer who unravels mysteries with the aid of his manservant Jock. To some, I’m sure the prospect of transferring that quirky and dryly British world to the big screen held a lot of promise. And, of course, who else would Hollywood hotshots pick but Johnny Depp to play the lead?

Those moviegoers hoping to step into a farcical, immersive cinematic world filled with jolly good charm and wit, however, are going to be sorely disappointed. Yes, Mr. Depp certainly wraps himself up gleefully in his prancing and roguishly mustachioed narcissistic character. But, quite frankly, words such as charming , witty and, well, even moderately amusing don’t apply in the slightest to this film or its cast.

The vintage post-swinging ’60s feel that the filmmakers were shooting for never quite congeals other than in the form of a fun musical underscore. The overwrought crime-caper script is rambling and borderline boring. And besides a running mustache gag that’s worth a grin or two, the sparse and sometimes shrill humor falls much closer to Austin Powers raunch than Inspector Clouseau madcap.

After spending more than two decades touring, directing, writing and producing for Christian theater and radio (most recently for Adventures in Odyssey, which he still contributes to), Bob joined the Plugged In staff to help us focus more heavily on video games. He is also one of our primary movie reviewers.

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Critics reviews.

"Crude Art Farce"

What You Need To Know:

(PaPa, B, LL, VV, SS, NN, AA, D, MM) Strong pagan worldview, mitigated by some moral elements, including marriage is extolled as protagonist and his wife are shown to be happily married; 10 obscenities (including two “f” words), one strong profanity using Jesus, seven light profanities such as “Oh God,” “Good Lord,” and “Dear God,” some British vulgarities like “bullocks,” one or two references to passing gas, and two scenes with vomiting; lots of comical action violence such as numerous slapstick, cartoonish gunfights and fistfights, a terrific scene of comical fencing/swordplay, thugs threaten to electrically shock protagonists private parts but he escapes, a hotel room is rigged to explode and does, causing property damage but not hurting anyone, a packed drinking bar accidentally goes up in flames though no one is hurt, and a funny car chase ends in a crash without anyone hurt; no explicit depicted sex but strong references overall includes man stumbles on a couple in bed, and it’s implied they’re nude, but the woman is strategically covered up, many double entendres and innuendoes intended for comedy (some are more crude than others), sounds of sex coming from next hotel room, comical sexual references, man’s moustache is compared to a woman’s private parts, woman tries to seduce married protagonist but fails, couple in bath together, but nothing explicit shown, married couple flirts with one another; painting shows upper female nudity, two women in very small bikinis, female cleavage, upper male nudity in bath scene, and implied nudity; much alcohol use; a painting shows Winston Churchill smoking cigar; and, strong miscellaneous immorality includes much deception, stealing and double-crosses, but couple repays their debts and restore a stolen painting to its proper place.

More Detail:

MORTDECAI is an action comedy about a comically unethical, globetrotting art dealer and his battle for a missing painting with secret codes worth millions. It has a strong pagan worldview, with plenty of innuendo intended to be funny and some foul language, mitigated by a few moral elements, especially toward the end when the lead characters do the right thing.

MORTDECAI stars Johnny Depp as Charlie Mortdecai, a wealthy, but financially imperiled, shady art dealer who travels the globe selling famous paintings at overpriced levels. His tendency to sell paintings that aren’t supposed to be sold (classics that are supposed to be in museums) for outrageous amounts frequently gets him into trouble and requires him to have an assistant named Jock (Paul Bettany), who’s always ready to help Mortdecai fight or shoot his way out of a tense situation with angry customers. Mortdecai’s other main associate is his wife Johanna (Gwyneth Paltrow), who jumps in to save the day when necessary.

As the movie opens, the couple are eight million pounds in debt to the British government in back taxes. Consequently, they are obligated to help out when an old friend of theirs, an MI-5 inspector named Martland (Ewan McGregor), shows up and asks them to help track down a painting by the famed artist Goya that’s been stolen and is being pursued by a Syrian terrorist.

Mortdecai and Johanna come to realize that the painting in question has long been rumored to have been in Nazi hands at one point, and that the back of the frame has codes to a bank account worth millions. While trying to get their hands on the painting for the British government, Mortdecai, Johanna and Jock must battle numerous private collectors dying to get their hands on the painting, along with the terrorist, some Russian spies, and assorted other angry past clients who want revenge for Mortdecai’s scheming by ripping him off in return. Globetrotting comic escapades ensue.

The studio didn’t have any advanced screenings for MORTDECAI, and most critics have savaged it as being heavy-handed. However, the audience that MOVIEGUIDE® saw it with laughed and chuckled throughout. Depp’s character is an utterly self-absorbed twit who, in a running gag, values his new mustache more than his wife (who hates it and threatens to leave him if he won’t shave it off).

MORTDECAI resembles the AUSTIN POWERS movies, if they were made in the lush visual style of Wes Anderson, the creator THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL. Also, like the Austin Powers movie, there are sexual innuendos at a rapid clip throughout the movie. Most of them are still less crass than those uttered by Mike Myers in the Austin Powers movies, but they push the boundaries of tastefulness. For example, in one of them, Mortdecai makes a crude comment about the Queen when talking about his tax debt. An example of one of the lighter ones is when Mortdecai asks Johanna how she’s doing as she precariously stands on a toilet trying to take the Goya painting off a wall, she replies tartly, “Great, for a woman who’s standing on a loo holding an old man’s Goya.”

Mortdecai and Martland, the MI-5 agent, were romantic rivals for Johanna in college. There is a brief flashback to those days when Martland stumbles across Mortdecai and Johanna engaged in illicit activity, in an implied nude scene. So, later, there is some teasing between the men. For example, Martland keeps joking that he’ll step in and replace Mortdecai if Johanna chooses to leave him over the mustache or their poor finances. Nothing ever comes of the teasing, however, and all three are ultimately just close friends.

In addition to the lewd content mentioned above, MORTDECAI also contains some foul language, including two “f” words, eight other obscenities and some profanities, one of which is strong. There is also plenty of comic action violence throughout, with shootings, bodies found stabbed, a couple of accidental fires, and a very funny car chase, but all of it is played at a level that’s cartoonish and relatively inoffensive. In addition, a painting shows upper female nudity. Finally, Mortdecai drinks a lot, but there are no scenes of drunkenness.

MORTDECAI has its moments of silly fun. Also, marriage seems to be extolled. However, MOVIEGUIDE® advises extreme caution for the movie’s foul language and stronger innuendoes.

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Mortdecai Reviews

• 27   Metascore
• 1 hr 47 mins
• Drama, Comedy, Action & Adventure
• Watchlist Where to Watch

A roguish art dealer seeks a stolen painting that could hold the code to a forgotten Nazi bank account filled with riches.

Oh the dismal depths to which Johnny Depp has sunk. The actor’s latest misfire, in which he plays a degenerate and nearly broke art dealer who dabbles in the black market, is an abysmal would-be comedy that sees the quickly falling star delivering a performance that’s as hammy and unfunny as it is dull and embarrassing. Someone, perhaps his manager or agent, should stage a career intervention ASAP. Mortdecai, based on Kyril Bonfiglioli’s irreverent 1973 novel Don’t Point That Thing at Me, is a dud from the get-go. The first scene, set in an upscale restaurant where Mortdecai attempts to unload a supposedly priceless vase on a suspicious thug and his henchmen, tries to achieve the same kind of comic, adventurous spirit that Steven Spielberg brought to the opening of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, in which chaos and gunfire erupt in a nightclub. But director David Koepp, who wrote or co-wrote War of the Worlds, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, and the first two Jurassic Park movies for Spielberg, is, unfortunately, no Spielberg. The scene fails to produce any laughs or thrills, and falls as flat as Depp’s late-stage career. Unfortunately, it’s all downhill from there. So, what is this mess of a movie about? Mortdecai is hired by an MI5 agent (a miscast Ewan McGregor) who is not-so-secretly in love with his gorgeous wife Johanna (Gwyneth Paltrow) to find a stolen Goya painting before it lands in the hands of a known terrorist, who will use it to fund his evil endeavors. Mortdecai accepts the mission; frankly, he has to, because the agent is aware of his dirty dealings in the art world and will prosecute him on a number of charges if he declines. But Mortdecai believes there is an invaluable secret hidden on the reverse side of the Goya, and it will make him rich again and bring an end to his financial woes. From there the story jets off to London, Moscow, and Los Angeles in an effort to find the missing masterwork and create silly mayhem along the way, but not a single laugh or chuckle is found. It’s not for want of trying: The movie tirelessly trots out three different running gags in an attempt to get viewers to laugh. The first and least funny focuses on Mortdecai’s newly grown mustache, which makes Johanna gag whenever she kisses him. The second involves Mortdecai’s inept handling of firearms, which continually end in his loyal manservant and bodyguard Jock Strapp (clever, huh?) being shot. The third revolves around Jock’s insatiable sexual appetite. Mortdecai desperately tries to invoke the same kind of light, breezy tone that the Pink Panther movies achieved with seemingly effortless flare. But those films were anchored by the brilliant Peter Sellers, a comic genius, and directed by Blake Edwards, who knew a thing or two about cinematic comedy. Suffice it to say that the missing Goya painting is eventually found and terrorism is averted. But the bigger mysteries raised by the movie are left unanswered. Among those questions: Is Johnny Depp capable of headlining another decent film whose title doesn’t begin with “Pirates”? What did David Koepp, who also helped write Spider-Man and Mission: Impossible, see in Eric Aronson’s laugh-free script that made him want to direct it? And why is Mortdecai rated R? It isn’t vulgar, violent, or filled with profanity. With a couple of minor trims the movie could easily have been rated PG-13, and thus might have attracted a family audience. As it stands now, families will stay away and the picture isn’t raunchy enough to attract older teens or young adults. It’s a missed opportunity on all fronts. Mortdecai is for die-hard Johnny Depp fans only, if there are any left -- but even they would be wise to avoid this disaster.

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ISS review – Ariana DeBose is ace as third world war sparks space station survival race

DeBose’s brilliant rookie astronaut navigates this moderately tense thriller about US and Russian crew fighting as Earth blazes below

A t first, the crew on board the International Space Station (ISS) mistake the tiny dot of fire on Earth for a volcano. But look: there’s another, and another. In fact, these astronauts have got a bird’s eye view of a nuclear tit-for-tat between the Russian and American governments that by the end of the movie turns the planet into a great glowing ball of fire. But for the six-person crew – three Americans and three Russians – nuclear Armageddon is only the start of their problems.

A lowish-budget, slightly muted survival thriller – moderately tense, with too few ideas to qualify as actively cerebral – what the movie does have is a brilliant performance by West Side Story ’s Ariana DeBose as biologist and rookie astronaut Kira. Like all the characters here, she’s a bit too thinly sketched, but DeBose brings real warmth and likability to the part, making Kira easy to root for. And there are some interesting moments as she adjusts to zero gravity.

The film’s director, Gabriela Cowperthwaite, made her name with the killer whale documentary Blackfish , and brings her documentary-maker’s curiosity to the mechanics of living in space. Sleep is the trickiest thing to acclimatise to, Kira quickly learns; one of the Russians, Nika (Masha Mashkova), shows her how to strap in to a harness at night. (Warning: some scenes are not suitable for claustrophobics.)

There’s a “no politics” rule on board the ISS – and the vibe is chummy and collegiate. But within minutes of the third world war breaking out, both the American and Russian crews get orders to seize control of the station “by any means necessary”. (Naturally, the villainous Russkies stick the knife in first.) And here’s where it gets implausible. Earth is burning below, but mostly these astronauts act as if there is something to play for: a government to report to, or a life to return to. No one seems to have an existential freakout about what awaits them if they survive: starvation, thirst, anarchy and a slow death.

Of course, the carnage on board is meant to be a microcosm of the mutual destruction below. One killing leads to another; it just doesn’t make much sense. Still, ISS does deliver one knock-out terrific death in space: a screwdriver to the neck, perfect little bubbles of blood floating prettily away in zero gravity.

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Dead boy detectives, common sense media reviewers.

Cheeky, action-packed ghost thriller has gore, language.

A Lot or a Little?

What you will—and won't—find in this TV show.

Do your best. Help people when you can. Speak up.

The Dead Boy Detectives themselves are committed t

Death is represented by a Black woman (The Sandman

Blood, gore, fighting with knives, fist fighting a

Flirting, kissing, hand holding, some sexual refer

Plenty of language includes: "f--k," and its varia

Some drinking among adults, smoking.

Parents need to know that Dead Boy Detectives is a comedy horror series based on comics by The Sandman creator Neil Gaiman, who wrote episodes of this show as well. Dead teens help solve mysteries in this fast-paced, humorous show, which is best suited for older teens. In it, an assortment of…

Positive Messages

Do your best. Help people when you can. Speak up. Don't give up. Persevere . Work with a team . Respect privacy. Speak in respectful ways. Think of the highest good in situations. Have a sense of humor. Don't give up.

Positive Role Models

The Dead Boy Detectives themselves are committed to helping fellow ghosts solve their problems so that they can move on to the next realm. They find a human psychic who uses her powers to help them solve cases among the living as well.

Diverse Representations

Death is represented by a Black woman ( The Sandman 's Kirby Howell-Baptiste) who wears an Ankh. The main characters are White, Black, Asian, and biracial teens, including Kassius Nelson and Yuyu Kitamura, who is an actress with Japanese heritage from Hong Kong. "Clients" in the boys' cases have diverse backgrounds and incomes.

Did we miss something on diversity? Suggest an update.

Violence & Scariness

Blood, gore, fighting with knives, fist fighting and kicking, peril, jump scares. Scary images and supernatural frights, stalking. Witches, demons, scary supernatural themes.

Did you know you can flag iffy content? Adjust limits for Violence & Scariness in your kid's entertainment guide.

Sex, Romance & Nudity

Flirting, kissing, hand holding, some sexual references.

Did you know you can flag iffy content? Adjust limits for Sex, Romance & Nudity in your kid's entertainment guide.

Plenty of language includes: "f--k," and its variants, "tw-t," "s--t," "Jesus," "damn," "hell," "God."

Did you know you can flag iffy content? Adjust limits for Language in your kid's entertainment guide.

Products & Purchases

Drinking, drugs & smoking.

Did you know you can flag iffy content? Adjust limits for Drinking, Drugs & Smoking in your kid's entertainment guide.

Parents Need to Know

Parents need to know that Dead Boy Detectives is a comedy horror series based on comics by The Sandman creator Neil Gaiman, who wrote episodes of this show as well. Dead teens help solve mysteries in this fast-paced, humorous show, which is best suited for older teens. In it, an assortment of historically varied ghosts bother the living. Violence includes ghouls, demons, and spirits chasing teens, scary faces, kidnapped children, demonic spirits being exorcised: lots of fist fighting, and knives. Language can be intense, including "f--k," and its variants, "tw-t," "s--t," "Jesus," "damn," "hell," "God," etc... Teamwork and courage are two character strengths that can be found in this unique series.

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There aren't any parent reviews yet. Be the first to review this title.

What's the Story?

Ghosts Edwin (George Rextrew) and Charles (Jayden Revri) stay in their ghostly forms to help malevolent spirits to move to the next realm. They're the detectives for hire in DEAD BOY DETECTIVES, and their reputation hangs on them finding the spells to get the nasty ghouls they're hired to tame into a level of existence that won't interfere with earthly life. Can they keep everything together to face their challenges? Or will their interactions with the living cause more destruction than they've been hired to control?

Is It Any Good?

The action kicks in and only lets up for snappy dialogue in this carefully crafted, spooky show. Dead Boy Detectives has the feel of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them -- if it was fed high voltage and injected with language and scares. Parents beware, though: expect blood, fighting, and supernatural scares. Families with older teens can enjoy this one together, but only if you're up for a shot of creepy thrills with a side of scary imagery.

Talk to Your Kids About ...

Families can talk about courage in Dead Boy Detectives. Do the scary scenarios in shows and movies help you face fears in real life?

Some of the violent things that happen in this show occur when people lose self-control . How does keeping control of your emotions help you stay safe?

Detectives like the young men in this show who work together help each other solve mysteries. How does teamwork help you get stuff done?

• Premiere date : April 25, 2024
• Cast : George Rexstrew , Jayden Revri , Kassius Nelson
• Network : Netflix
• Genre : Science Fiction
• Topics : Magic and Fantasy , Superheroes
• Character Strengths : Courage , Self-control , Teamwork
• TV rating : TV-MA
• Last updated : April 25, 2024

Did we miss something on diversity?

Research shows a connection between kids' healthy self-esteem and positive portrayals in media. That's why we've added a new "Diverse Representations" section to our reviews that will be rolling out on an ongoing basis. You can help us help kids by suggesting a diversity update.

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More From Forbes

‘challengers’ reviews: does zendaya tennis movie score with critics.

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Cropped "Challengers" movie poster

Challengers — Zendaya’s new romantic sports drama set in the world of tennis — is new in theaters.

Playing in previews Thursday night and opening nationwide in theaters Friday, Challengers is the hotly anticipated movie from the Euphoria star that was originally scheduled to open in theaters on September 15, 2023.

However, due to disruptions in the entertainment industry during the Screen Actors Guild strike against the studios last summer into fall, Challengers ’ studio, Amazon MGM, pushed back the release date to April 26.

Directed by Call Me By Your Name filmmaker Luca Guadagnino, Challengers tracks the love triangle between three gifted tennis players — Tashi Duncan ( Zendaya ), Patrick Zweig (Josh O’Connor) and Art Donaldson (Mike Faist) — and hops back and forth between the time Patrick and Art met Tashi in 2006 and the film’s crucial tennis match in 2019.

The film begins with the 2019 match between Patrick and Art — once close friends and doubles partners in the youth tennis circuit — who have become bitter rivals after Toshi begins dating Patrick. Art — who was just as smitten as Patrick was when they both met Tashi 13 years before — never lost his love for her and they marry and have a child together after she suffers a crushing career-ending injury.

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In addition to marrying Art, Tashi is the tennis pro’s coach. However, since Art has a confidence problem that may prevent him from reaching the pinnacle of his career, she talks her husband into entering the Challenger tournament, which includes Patrick. Unfortunately, that means Art will eventually face his old friend in a match and the two will need confront their past wounds.

At the time of publication, Challengers had received a stellar reception from critics on the review aggregation site Rotten Tomatoes , where it has earned a 92 percent “fresh” rating on the site’s Tomatometer based on 157 reviews.

What Are Top Critics Saying About ‘Challengers’?

Challengers has scored consistently high with some of the biggest outlets in the nation, particularly with the industry’s trade publications.

Calling Luca Guadagnino’s sports-romance combo “hip, sexy and ridiculously overheated,” Variety critic Peter Debruge has mostly positive things to say about Challengers . Debruge not only praises the trio of leads — he calls Zendaya’s performance “astonishing” — but he’s also impressed by Luca Guadagnino’s creative filmmaking, especially in scenes on the tennis court.

“Whether audiences identify as Team Patrick or Team Art, Guadagnino pulls a risky yet inspired trick, effectively scoring the winning shot himself,” Debruge wrote.

David Rooney of The Hollywood Reporter is just as high on Challengers , as he begins his review by writing how the film is “smart, seductive and bristling with sexual tension.” Rooney also calls the chemistry between Zendaya, Josh O’Connor and Mike Faist “off the charts.”

Like Debruge, Rooney praises the cinematography of Challengers as well as the film’s “peppy dialogue,” even though he writes, “In terms of nuts-and-bolts narrative, Challengers is relatively thin.”

Art (Mike Faist), Tashi (Zendaya) and Patrick (Josh O'Connor) in a scene from "Challengers."

Not every critic is as enthusiastic about Challengers as Debruge, Rooney or their Rotten Tomatoes counterparts.

Mark Feeney gives Challengers 2.5 stars (out of four) in his review for the Boston Globe pointing out that, unlike the Will Smith tennis movie King Richard , Challengers is “only masquerading as a tennis movie — extensively masquerading to be sure.”

Instead, Feeney said Challengers “really is a soap opera, a lively and very trickily structured one.”

Richard Whittaker of the Austin Chronicle , meanwhile, slams Challengers in his 1 star (out of 5) review, saying the movie is a “double fault after double fault.”

In particular, Whittaker goes after Guadagnino and his screenwriter, saying the director “rolls into the courtside thriller with all the sex appeal of a gym sock and a lousy script by Justin Kuritzkes, the poor man’s Whit Stillman. It’s trashy Eurosleaze with none of the sumptuous debauchery.”

Challengers is now in theaters.

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‘Unsung Hero’ Review: Music Dedicated to the One They Love

In fact, there’s a lot of singing in the clan whose members inspired this movie and who have racked up five Grammy Awards for their Christian recordings.

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By Nicolas Rapold

In the faith-based drama “Unsung Hero,” an Australian concert promoter trying to earn a living makes a last-ditch move to Nashville with his wife and six children. Based on an actual family of musicians, it mostly plays as a treacly tribute to the parents of Joel and Luke Smallbone — a.k.a. the Christian pop duo For King & Country — and their sister, the singer Rebecca St. James.

Viewer beware: Between the uplift and the cringe, this movie may cause whiplash. Joel Smallbone plays his own father, David, who faces financial and reputational ruin after booking a big concert and failing to pack the house. He resettles the family in the United States, but no job materializes. His pep-talking spouse, Helen (Daisy Betts), and their beatific children pull up bootstraps and practically whistle while they work, but it’s not enough.

Community, humility and the power of prayer are the lessons on offer in their story, set in the 1990s, bathed in warm light and interspersed with home video segments. Fellow churchgoers pitch in, and David gets over himself; he secures auditions for his teenage daughter, Rebecca (Kirrilee Berger), who keeps breaking into dulcet song about how everything is beautiful. The outcome of “Unsung Hero,” as written and directed by Richard L. Ramsey and Joel Smallbone, is never in doubt, though the climax has a kicker line that genuinely surprises with its laughable shamelessness.

The family business has become a success: Rebecca, Joel and Luke have won five Grammys among them. But despite the fuzzy good intentions, it’s tough to make much of this making-of story.

Unsung Hero Rated PG. Running time: 1 hour 52 minutes. In theaters.

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‘Nowhere Special’ Review: Understated Terminal Illness Drama Earns Your Tears

'Still Life' filmmaker Uberto Pasolini delivers a subtle and caring statement on navigating grief through terrific leads James Norton and young newcomer Daniel Lamont. 

By Tomris Laffly

Tomris Laffly

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Meanwhile, his often silent and always observant toddler Michael deals with his own share of grief, at an age he doesn’t have any context or vocabulary for the mortality of a loved one. As most parents do, John tries to protect Michael as best he could from the grim idea of death. Still, the little one can’t avoid the truth entirely, not when he accompanies John from home to home in his dad’s attempt to find the perfect family to take in and raise Michael. A young, kindly adoption agency employee helps them out in John’s quest, as he interviews those desiring to become Michael’s caregivers in a future John won’t be a part of. Elsewhere, John is tasked with projects like creating a memory journal for Michael to read in the future — spiritually taxing undertakings he wants to avoid as long as possible.

So, what kind of a future should John hope for his child when his own life is about the expire? What should he (what should anyone ) prioritize: love, capability, financial security? How does one explain that choice to their offspring? Or better yet, how does one involve him in the decision? These are the weighty questions posed by writer-director Pasolini (who bears no relation to the legendary Pier Paolo, but is a descendant of the neorealist master Luchino Visconti). And he asks them through a lens both socially aware and emotionally layered.

“Nowhere Special” is the kind of confident, understated film that doesn’t need to pound the audience with its sentiments in order to make us feel alive and human in front of it. There are no great declarations about sickness or death here (even the death of Michael’s mom is mentioned in passing), or grand emotional explosions you’d expect from a lesser picture. Instead, Pasolini leans closer into his visual language to show (and not tell), constructing a world of mirrored images and subtle reflections that suggest fractures in characters, all challenged by notions like “what if” and “if only.”

Even costuming choices demonstrate Pasolini’s thoughtful eye for visuals in support of the film’s narrative textures. For instance, instead of burdening the young newcomer Lamont with mawkish dialogue lines, he telegraphs Michael’s innocence through a charmingly faded red baseball cap, placed awkwardly over the little one’s bowl cut and bangs, making him look both impossibly cute and vulnerable at once. One exception to the movie’s overall restraint is perhaps Andrew Simon McAllister’s lovely yet heavy-handedly sentimental score. Luckily, Pasolini doesn’t overuse it, mostly allowing the organic journey of the heartbreakingly burdened father and his troubled son speak for itself.

Much of that journey surely rests on the shoulders of the terrific Norton (“Happy Valley,” Greta Gerwig’s “Little Women”) and Lamont, who jointly give heartrending performances as characters navigating an unbearable situation. Since actors as young as Lamont can only be only as good as the adults holding their hand, Norton and Pasolini both prove they know how to tap into a child performer’s capabilities with care and compassion. That care is what makes “Nowhere Special” a refreshing tearjerker, one that doesn’t manipulate, but lets audiences cry on their own terms when John finally makes the only right choice.

Reviewed online, April 25, 2024. In Venice Film Festival 2020. Running time: 96 MIN.

• Production: A Cohen Media Group release of a Red Wave Films, Picomedia, Digital Cube, N.S.L. production, in association with Rai Cinema. Producers: Uberto Pasolini, Roberto Sessa, Cristian Nicolescu.
• Crew: Director, writer: Uberto Pasolini. Camera: Marius Panduru. Editors: Masahiro Hirakubo, Saska Simpson. Music: Andrew Simon McAllister.
• With: James Norton, Daniel Lamont, Eileen O’Higgins, Valerie O’Connor, Stella McCusker.

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